The Doctor and River were sitting in some alien bar on one of their nights. Both of them were drunk beyond recognition after having started a game of Never-Have-I-Ever that was entirely River's idea.
"Never... have I... ever," the Doctor said slurring, "Uh... been slapped."
River looked offended, as most of the times she knew for a fact he had been slapped, were her fault, "Yes you have!" she protested, "Multiple times!"
The Doctor, in his super-drunk state, thought he was clever enough to fool his wife, or just about anyone into thinking anything for that matter, "Never-Have-I-Ever." He repeated factually, surprisingly un-slurred.
"Oh I can fix that." River said dangerously. She leaned forward and slapped him so hard that the timelord fell ungracefully off his seat. Perhaps it was a combination of his inebriated state or the force of River's slap, but he ended up on the floor no less.
"Damn." the Doctor said, climbing up onto his seat. He grabbed the colour-changing alcohol bottle from the space between them and poured himself another-shot-too-many, downing quickly.
A/N:
I know there are tons of other drunk fics out there (And tons of other fics called Never Have I Ever, at that), so add mine to the pile I suppose ;)
I came up with this idea at about 10:37-ish at night after my sister stated that she had never been slapped to which I replied "I can fix that." and leaned in threateningly close.
But anyway, who doesn't enjoy a good River-And-Doctor-Getting-Drunk-And-River-Slapping-The-Doctor-Fic?
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