Huh... this is a very dark fic I set on 25th June 2010. I know it's not that date yet, but I couldn't wait. Please don't flame Michael, and much less the poor girl for killing herself after him. Lol to IvyRaven.

I stare out the window, hot tears blurring my vision. The sun rays, turned into light swords, tear the night's black velvet cloak, and make her drop crimson blood. The Moon, merciful, turned them into gold, aqua, royal violet, baby pink and even ivy green. A dawn is always beautiful; when the colourful slaughter of the night is finished and the sun shines bright, I wipe away my tears and look up. Your smiling face, frozen forever in the photo which looks down at me, greets me once again, as every morning. As every day of the last year. Year, I think to myself, yes, it makes today your first anniversary in Heaven. Are you happy there? , I cannot help but wonder. You were so perfect. I sigh. As always, I haven't slept in the whole night. I am so lost without you… why didn't you take me on your eternal trip? I rise from bed, my tired body screaming in pain and asking me to lie down again… but I can't. I wander through the house, it's empty. My relatives are gone; they know exactly in what mood I would awaken today. I'm just so gloomy.

I drop myself to the cold marble floor of the bathroom, coldness welcoming me with open arms, numbing my pain. I look over me, the little wounds from the last few days healing slowly and still reopening and bleeding a little with my moves. My legs, thighs, arms, hands, belly, hips, chest and shoulders are covered with those little cuts, because I cannot reach my back, pity. My young blood poured in sacrifice for yours, day by day, slowly, each time the sun fell behind the horizon.

I rise slowly from the marble's numbing embrace, and I reach out to catch the razorblade. I slice my arm across delightfully, and I'm surprised to see that I still have blood to spill. It leaks to the floor and pools there, soaking my feet, but I don't notice. Today's the day I will return to your dearest arms, to your warmness, which never greeted me. Today I'll meet you. And you'll love me, I'm sure, because fate can't be that harsh… can it?

I change arm, and another time I slice my tender flesh. I watch my crimson blood run until a numbness which has nothing to do with the cold floor invades me. I smile. Rewarded, at last.

See you very soon, Michael, my King.

Happy anniversary.