A/N: I know I have been gone for a while, and I double know I have a fic half finished and pending, but like... here have a cute V-day Merthur and forgive me a little bit?

This was humiliating.

Table for two, with candle stands and beautiful table linen, the cutlery glinting in the dim, intimate lighting of the place. Arthur's seat was next to the wall length window but for today, the blue curtains were drawn across it, so as to shut out the outside world, and let you feel like you are in a different world altogether. He could hear the hushed whispers from the tables around him, and something slow and melodic was playing on the speakers- so mesmerizing that you didn't even realize there was music; it felt like part of this surreal world. Sometimes a tinkling laughter would break the quiet but that was a little bit magical on its own.

Hotel Camelot, on Valentine's Day, was everyone's dream date venue.

Things were different of course, if your date was late!

The waiter had come twice to ask him his order, and if he had to face that one more time, he was going to get up and leave- damn his vow to Morgana. She was the reason he was in this awkward situation in the first place. Worse than that, the couples on the tables adjacent to his had starting giving him sort of pitying looks.

Where the hell was Vivian?

He drummed his fingers on the table, fidgeting. He decided to wait five more minutes. If Vivian still did not arrive, he would leave, Morgana's teasing be damned. Arthur sent the third text in last half hour to the number, punching in the words "Where are you?" angrily, and adding a little smiley at the end to soften the blow. He willed the mobile to chime back, giving him an answer.

Startling at the sound of door opening, he quickly looked away from glaring at his useless phone, putting a smile on his face for his Valentine- even though he felt more like strangling her than kissing her at the moment- and froze.

No way.

No fucking way.

He was going to murder Morgana.

A beautiful girl with curly hair done in an elaborate up do, a dark shining skin, wearing a gorgeous red outfit was coming in. By her side was a tall, sinfully sexy man, in a dark suit and a red tie matching the girl's dress. They both made a stunning couple- which was no strange sight on V-day- but there was only one little problem.

This was Arthur's ex and his best friend.

Oh, he was going to eviscerate Morgana.

He had dated Gwen for two years. Even though he was expecting the breakup, it had still stung. When she and Lance started dating, he couldn't say he was surprised. The day the two of them had met, Arthur had a sinking suspicion they were meant to be. So when Lance had come to him, asking for permission, he had clapped him on the back and laughed.

It still hurt though. Not the fact that Gwen chose Lance over him, but that he wasn't what she was looking for. Worse than that… that she wasn't what he was looking for. He had wanted so badly for her to be the one, because if not her, than he had no idea who would fill the hole in his life. He tried not to let it show. Which was exactly what this day was about. Proving to Morgana that he was not still pining over her.

Arthur should've known Morgana was nothing if not devious.

He caught Gwen's eyes and promptly looked away, staring at the design on his plate, hoping she would ignore him. Guinevere, though, was too kind a soul to expect that from.

"Arthur." He heard an excited and pleased voice coming towards him and winced.

"Hi Gwen," he looked up and smiled a little, looking at the beaming Lancelot at her back. He shrugged, as if to say 'what can you do?' The man had a point. Gwen was a force of nature. Nobody could do anything about her.

He stood up when she approached, kissing her on the cheek, and then moved to shake Lance's hand. "Hi Arthur. Good to see you mate." He punched him lightly on the shoulder, before forgoing the handshake and giving him a hearty hug.

"So it's true," Gwen exclaimed happily, "Morgana told us but we couldn't believe it. You actually have been dating someone in secret." She was so excited about the prospect that Arthur felt bad lying. But there was no other way.

"Yeah. They are running a little late." He tried not to let his displeasure show.

"That's good man. I am happy for you," Lance said, as Gwen bounced on her feet and squealed. Happily-in-love look suited her, Arthur thought bitterly. He had never seen her glow quite like this.

"Anyway, what are you two doing here?" He looked between the two of them, already suspecting the answer.

"Oh it was Morgana. She is such a dear. She reserved us seats here, even though you have to do it months in advance. I don't know how she pulled it off but I can't thank her enough. This has been my dream… Valentine's day at Hotel Camelot." Gwen sighed happily, looking at Lance, who was smiling back at her. It was such a personal moment that Arthur looked away, uncomfortable.

"Alright now, why don't you go to our table, and let poor Arthur relax, yeah?" Lance asked her, lovingly.

"Okay," she whispered back, still staring into his eyes, and then seemed to shake her head a bit and direct a dazed look at Arthur, "Oh Arthur, I am so glad that you're dating again. We were all very concerned and…" She clapped her hand on her mouth before she could complete her sentence, and Arthur knew there was a grimace on his face.

"Enjoy your date Gwen," he said instead, wanting this conversation to be over already.

"You too." She nodded at him, giving Lance another lingering look before going away.

"Don't keep the lady waiting Lancelot. Go." Arthur really wanted him to leave so he could sit down and wallow in self-pity. No matter what Morgana said, he wasn't still in love with Gwen, but he definitely was envious of what she had now. The way she radiated joy. He wanted to be the cause of that in somebody. He wanted to feel that!

"In a minute. I actually have to ask something," Lance confided, in a small voice.

"Oh no." Arthur dreaded.

"You don't even know what it is."

"You're gonna propose aren't you?" Arthur made it is sound like it was the end of the world.

"How-" Lance gaped, and Arthur couldn't help chuckling at that.

"Because you are a giant sap and I know you."

"So." Lance looked down and shuffled, "Do you think she will say yes."

"Is the sky blue? Is the sun bright? Is Gwen in love with you?"

"Alright alright. Don't be dramatic." Lance rolled his eyes, but he looked pleased.

"Don't keep your bride-to-be waiting. Not on Valentine's day. And definitely not on the day you plan to propose!"

"I am going. I am going. Jesus! Can I just say how good it is to see you? Introduce us to your date yeah." Lance gave him an awkward shoulder pat before turning around, and his whole world seem to get transfixed at the sight of his girlfriend again, drawn to her like a magnet.

Arthur sat down with a sigh, eyeing Lance's fit ass as he moved away- it was a very nice ass. Distantly glad they were too engrossed in each other to look around- or notice him- he stretched back in his chair and groaned. He was happy for them, he really was. There was no lingering jealousy in his heart.

He was just so fucking lonely.

He was tapping his phone unconsciously when it pinged. Sitting bolt upright he opened it eagerly, delighted to see the notification of a message from Vivian. Finally!

Vivian Olaf (6:43 pm) : I hope this makes you realize what I felt like when I asked you to accompany me to the company meeting and you declined.

Wtf.

That was two years ago. He was in relationship with Gwen back then! What was Vivian talking about?

Vivian Olaf (6:44 pm) : Been looking forward to this day for years.

Vivian Olaf (6:44 pm) : Revenge is the dish best served cold.

Vivian Olaf (6:45 pm) : In other words. Fuck you.

There is no other thing choice. Arthur dropped his head down on the table and closed his eyes. Damn it.

Why did he have to choose Vivian for this? He could've asked anyone. Anyone would have agreed to be his emergency date to soothe his sister's paranoia about his mental health, but of course he had to go for the beautiful, but famously petty Vivian. She had smiled, and swung her blond hair and fluttered her big eyelashes when he had asked her out on a date; he was such a fool.

Arthur clenched his fingers tightly under the table and weighed his options. One option actually. He had to get up and leave- nothing else he could do. He would leave a generous tip, and avoid this establishment for the next century. There was only one problem though…

Gwen and Lance would definitely see him leaving. Alone.

Goddammit.

Steeling himself, he raised his head and stood up. He planned to keep his eyes on the exit and not stop till he was home. Because he was so focused on the goal, he was startled to find himself face to face with a stranger as soon as he was standing.

"Excu-" His sentence was cut short before it began because the man leaned forward and placed his lips on his cheek lightly, stunning him into a frozen statue. It was followed by a sentence that made him deflate,

"She is looking this way. Just go with it darling," the stranger spoke into his ear, and then nudged his arm slightly to make him sit back.

Arthur fell back into his chair, thoroughly confused.

"Who even are you?" he asked, keeping his voice low and forcing a smile on his face- he could practically feel Gwen and Lance's eyes on him.

"A good Samaritan. A bleeding heart. An angel who saves people from social embarrassments. Take your pick." The man- young, Arthur's age, tall and lean, with black hair was now pulling out the chair in front of Arthur and settling himself.

Arthur snorted, "An uninvited guest more like."

"Do you want me to leave? Because I could leave." The stranger gestured, and Arthur's eyes snapped to the side to see Gwen's attention focused on him. She gave him a thumbs up from where she was sitting. He grabbed the man's hand- surprisingly delicate- and placed it back on the table.

"That's what I thought." There was an infuriating smirk on his face and Arthur wanted to wipe it off all of a sudden.

"Why are you even here?" He moved forward a little and bit out in low voice.

"That woman is your ex; isn't she?" He countered his question with a question. Softening his face- if only for the benefit of the onlookers- he nodded.

"And your date bailed?" It would help Arthur hate the man less if he sounded even a little sorry. Instead, he just sounded like a self-assured jerk.

"Yes," he answered, grinding his teeth. "Still doesn't answer the question as to why you are here."

"Honestly. Why does nobody appreciate good intentions anymore? I saw a man in a tight spot and thought I would help."

"Am I supposed to believe you are doing it out of the goodness of your heart?"

"What other reasons could I have?" he asked, completely innocent.

Arthur turned it around in his head, and could not come up with a response so he went with the other question that popped into his head, "Why would you even think I date men?"

"Oh please." The man snorted. His eyes twinkled. In the dim light, Arthur suddenly noticed how blue they were.

"What?"

"The way you were staring at your ex's boyfriend's backside… A blind man could see it."

"A blind man can't actually see you know."

"Semantics." The man casually shrugged, and then placed his elbow on the table and his chin on his palm to blink at him prettily.

Huh.

Where did that thought come from?

"Okay. I accept that… but what made you think I would be interested in you?"

"Firstly. You don't have to be. I am your rescue date. You can pretend to have ditched me tomorrow… but you could be nice to me. I am doing you a favor here. And secondly… Have you seen me? Who wouldn't be?"

The dark haired man was grinning, and Arthur thought it was time to actually look at the situation- or the stranger- properly. He was clothed in a blue dress shirt- which brought out his eyes- and black pants, no tie, untidy but sexy hair- seriously where were these thoughts coming from?- and the sharpest cheekbones Arthur had ever seen. It wasn't misplaced over confidence. Arthur had to give the man that much. He was definitely easy on the eyes.

But that was beside the point.

"I don't even know your name," Arthur complained.

The man grimaced a bit, and muttered, "Its Merlin."

"Is that a joke?"

"Oh hey look! The waiter is here," the man- Merlin- chirped happily as a waiter dropped a drinks menus on their table. Merlin's expressions suddenly changed into coy and flirtatious as he looked at Arthur and asked sweetly,

"Honey, did you already decide what we are going to eat?"

Arthur wanted to gag. Instead, grudgingly, he ordered the man to bring champagne and proceed with the three course meal Arthur had already ordered to impress Vivian. The server picked the menus back and left with a smile and a nod.

"You're such a typical guy." Merlin grinned at him.

"Excuse me?"

"Pre-ordering the meal before the lady shows up. A little presumptuous isn't it? What if she didn't like it?"

"I assure you… there is no way she wouldn't have liked the food."

"Oh. So it's just you she doesn't like then. Is that it?"

Arthur groaned.

"Gotcha."

"You're a horrible person you know that?"

"And you are a prat."

"Come again?"

"Considering you still haven't given me your name, that title seems fitting." Merlin raised his eyebrows at him in a completely infuriating and not at all adorable way.

"Like how you gave me a fake name?" Arthur countered.

"It's not a fake name!"

"You're absolutely right. You are the great wizard Merlin."

"Hence proven. Prat." Merlin spread both of his hands as if demonstrating to a crowd.

"My name is Arthur. Also, you're an idiot."

"Oi. Is that any way to talk to your savior?'

"And what… pray tell me, are you saving me from?"

"The mortification of spending Valentine's Day alone?"

"You…"

Before he could say anything else, the server appeared with a bottle of champagne and two long stemmed glasses, and their appetizer.

"Shrimp Arthur," Merlin commented once they were alone again, because he was a smartass, "What if she was allergic?"

"She isn't."

"How do you know?"

"I just do okay."

"Did you ask her?"

"Jeez. Would you let it go?"

"No wonder she dumped you!"

"She dumped me because she is an immature child who is still upset over something that happened two years ago."

"Wait, wait. Stop." Merlin raised his hand, making Arthur pause, and then waved it going, "Oh yeah. There it is. Your prattiness is showing again."

Arthur grinded his teeth, unable to come up with a response to that utter nonsense.

"Eat your food Arthur," Merlin gestured as he took a forkful and placed it into his mouth. Arthur stared at him only in annoyance. There was nothing enticing about how his lips closed around the metal. And even if there was, he was allowed to appreciate beauty in aesthetic sense. Nothing wrong with that.

Forcing himself to go back to offense, he asked, "If you are such a charmer, why are you lonely today?"

"Who said I am lonely?" Merlin widened his eyes in amazement.

"You're saying you didn't come here alone?"

"I most definitely did. But doesn't mean I am lonely. I am basically taking my favorite person out on a date." Merlin straightened his shoulders proudly.

"Huh."

"Myself." Merlin grinned as if he delivered the world's cleverest punchline.

"That was the world's lamest joke," Arthur pointed out, trying to keep his lips from twitching into a smile.

"Your face is the world's lamest joke," Merlin retaliated.

"What are you? Five?"

"I am if you agree you are a clot pole."

"A WHAT?"

They were both grinning at each other and smiling, as they continued with their pointless banter- which Arthur was enjoying more and more- while the waiting staff took away their starter plates and came with the main course.

"So, Merlin. You never did say why you were here alone? Did your date ditch you too?" Arthur asked after a while, sobering up a little as he cut into his steak.

"No. I really wasn't joking about the coming alone part."

"Why would you come to a famous couple's spot today of all days… alone?" Arthur asked, amazed.

"Well," Merlin rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, "You see… I am a reporter."

"A reporter?" Arthur raised his eyebrows at that.

"Yeah. I am to publish an article about the dating culture of Valentine's Day. Which is why I have reserved tables at different restaurants at different times of the day. This is actually my third restaurant since noon."

Oh this was interesting. The way Merlin looked downright embarrassed by that, the tips of his –adorably large- ears flushing, and a pink tinge creeping on his cheeks. Arthur watched, enchanted, and decided a distraction was in order.

"So… what have you learned so far?"

"Well… it's the story of diabetes inducing cheesiness, proposals, and of rare tantrums where the girl throws flowers on the ground and tramples them before stomping out."

"Oddly specific." Arthur noted.

"Yeah." Was all Merlin said in reply. The shudder that followed it was explanation enough.

Arthur finished his steak and leaned back in his chair, comfortably sated and slightly buzzed because of the alcohol, and contemplated his situation. Objectively, he knew he was fucked.

Merlin was everything he never knew he was looking for. He was leggy, and mouthy. He gave as good as he got, and then some. To top it all off he was as gorgeous as sin.

Merlin relaxed in his chair too and looked at him over the top of his glass, smiling fondly, and Arthur realized he wasn't just fucked. He was fucked!

That was when the applause started.

Arthur sank lower in his chair, hiding his face and Merlin looked startled for a moment. He looked around and then stared at Arthur with wide eyes.

"Is that…?"

"Yes." Arthur nodded.

"No way."

"Yeah."

"Oh you poor man!"

"Oi. I would let you know that I am completely over her, and very happy for her."

Merlin's face softened. "I know. I can see that. I am sorry I was just pulling your leg."

Arthur did not know what to do with this sudden sincere Merlin, so he just took another sip of his drink and mumbled a low thanks.

He was immensely grateful when the waiter cleared the table again and came back with the dessert. Once again, Arthur realized his mistake too late and let out a disappointed groan. Merlin looked thoroughly entertained.

It was molten lava cake with ice cream. Served in one bowl with two spoons.

"How thoughtful sweetie," Merlin teased in that fake-sweet voice of his, batting his eyelashes before digging in with the spoon. The moan he emitted after tasting it was obviously exaggerated but it went straight to Arthur's groin. Shifting a little, he picked up his own spoon.

He bloody loved this dessert. Wasn't going to let a little awkwardness get into his way of enjoying it.

"I have to say, she missed out. The food was definitely difficult to dislike," Merlin stated halfway through demolishing the cake.

"So gracious of you." Arthur bit out sarcastically.

"Still could've been allergic to shrimps though."

"Do shut up Merlin."

"As you say My Lord."

"God. You're insufferable aren't you?" Arthur's complaint was too fond to hold any bite.

"And you're a massive Prat. But still… the company wasn't half bad." The sentence started as a taunt, but it ended up being soft and genuine. Arthur glanced up to find Merlin looking at him with warmth in his eyes, enhanced by the candle light and almost giving them an ethereal glow. His breath caught in his throat, enraptured by the moment, as he stared back… not exactly sure what his face was showing, but helpless to hide it.

Clearing of throat next to their table made them jump. Arthur looked around startled, only to find Gwen standing there, biting her lip in mirth.

"Welcome back," she teased and Arthur looked between her and Merlin, wondering what to do.

Merlin, bless his soul, took over the situation comfortable, getting up from his seat and offering his hand with a "My Lady," and then took her hand and kissed it. "I am Merlin. Also, I guess congratulations are in order."

Gwen giggled, "Arthur. He is such a gentleman. Can we please keep him?"

"He's a nuisance. You don't know him yet."

"I am afraid he is quite right. But considering he is a giant pain in the ass too, I would say we are evenly matched. Don't you agree?" Merlin said in conspiratorial tone.

"I would."

"Guinevere. I thought you were on my side."

"He congratulated me. You haven't yet. I have already picked sides."

Arthur clapped his hand on his forehead, "I am so sorry, how did forget? Congratulations Gwen. Lance is a lucky man."

"Damn right I am." Lance appeared at her side, wrapping an arm around her. "And I don't think we can blame you for forgetting though. You are quite… otherwise occupied." He winked, looking at Merlin. Merlin threw his head back and laughed, while Arthur rubbed the bridge of his nose in exasperation.

"Shall we go?" Lance asked Gwen, who nodded. They shared a chaste kiss, before Lance left again, probably to get the car around.

Gwen looked at the two of them, and then threw her arms around Arthur. "I am so happy. For myself yes, but also for you," she said, loud, and then quietly just for his ears, "he is lovely Arthur. And you look happy around him."

Arthur felt almost guilty when she stepped back, her eyes glistening. Merlin made to grab her hand for a gentlemanly kiss again, but she shook her head and hugged him as well, asking him to take care of Arthur, before leaving. She turned at the door to give them a little wave, which they both returned in a daze.

Soon after that, Arthur motioned for the bill, and left a generous tip, completely ignoring Merlin's protests. "I can pay for my bloody food," "I am sure you can, but this is my date," "you're really obnoxious," "fine, as long as I still pay," "Prat!"

When they were done with everything, Arthur looked at Merlin and realized that he did not want this evening to end… not just yet. Maybe not ever. But Merlin was making for getting up. Arthur stood up too, and walked with him out of the Camelot Hotel. Once outside, Merlin turned towards him and said,

"Well. That was fun."

"Where do you think you're going now?" Arthur asked, feeling for his next move.

"Onto my next haunt. Stalking more couples."

"No you aren't." Arthur crossed his arms across his chest.

"I am not?" Merlin looked at him in confusion.

Arthur swung an arm around Merlin's neck, and then ruffled his hair, forcing him to keep walking, "You decided to be my fake-valentine. You don't get to half ass it. Show some commitment. "

"Oh yeah," he was sure he wasn't imagining the smile in the man's voice, nor the relief, "and what does that entail?"

"I dunno… I was thinking we could go watch a movie."

"Sounds like typical V-day culture. I could write about that. This is for research."

"It sure is." Arthur agreed, smiling broadly.

"Arthur?" Merlin said, after they had walked a few paces in quiet.

"Yeah?'

"You say I can't half ass being your Valentine… though I can't help but notice that you haven't even kissed me yet."

Arthur's lips had frozen into a perpetual smile. He could not remember feeling so happy in a long time, nor so charmed- maybe not ever, "That can be remedied." He said, stopping and turning around to face Merlin.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Happy Valentine's Day Arthur," Merlin said, when Arthur's breath was ghosting over his lips.

"Happy fucking Valentine." Arthur returned the sentiment, before sealing his fate by leaning forward the remaining few inches.

A/N: I had this cute scenario in my head and it really wanted to be written. Happy Valentine's day you all!