Disclaimers:
These characters are not mine, but CLAMP'S. If you did not know this, you have probably entered the wrong fanfiction domain, but - stay anyway, and please R this contains shounen-ai (non-explicit male-male relationship), if this offends you I suggest you do not read this or indeed fics of mine containing Yue, Yukito and Touya. . . i.e. any of them.
^_o Enjoy! _____________________________________________________________________
Sleeping. . .
Full moon tonight, simply perfect. . . There was no-one about to disturb his rooftop contemplation of the glorious night sky. Sunset had long faded into the deepest, most spacious expanse of stars he had seen since moving to this populated area, a great canopy of stars, dominated, tonight, by the moon's full glowing face.
It was tempting to take to the air and escape the dim glow of the streetlamps beneath his feet, dive ever closer to the shining orb, but. . . in the deserted street and calm air the streetlamps were unobtrusive, the air sweet and cool and refreshing. And the scene was wonderfully, blessedly free of interruptions. . .
Then Yue frowned. He didn't need anyone to interrupt him when part of his subconscious was embodied by Yukito, his false-form and cheerful expert on all things culinary. He'd be willing to bet the snow bunny was dreaming about food again. . . of course, he didn't need to bet: Yue could take a peak at Yukito's dreams any time he chose, and in the past had often done so. After all, they were, technically speaking, different aspects of the same person. However, lately he'd refrained from doing this, partly because Yukito would soon start to realise that the exchange operated both ways. . . It was ridiculous! He was tip-toeing mentally, around his own false-form. It wasn't as if Yukito had any direct control over Yue at all: sharing memories and thoughts were one thing, but the snow rabbit had no ability to create false memories, as Yue had done for him, nor any hold over the transformation process. Yue could simply wipe him out of existence if he became too troublesome, and incorporate his thoughts and feelings back into his own psyche. Sometimes he thought he might. . . But. . . Yue hesitated to do this. Yukito was a part of the community here, accepted and trusted and liked by those surrounding his mistress. Yue was, in fact, despite his magical powers and duty to Sakura-sama, much more of an outsider than his false form.
And besides, Yue didn't deny that he was fond of Yukito, not quite in the same way a parent loves a child - for in many senses, Yukito was more experienced than he was - but he did care for him, in an odd way. His old master, the magician Clow Reed, had always considered his creations with the utmost care, and he would nurture them to their highest potential once they were realised. To Yue's knowledge, Clow had never, ever destroyed any of his creations, even when they turned out differently than he had intended. Life wasn't easy to grant and it shouldn't be easy to take away. So Yue left Yukito alone and hoped that the snow bunny, newly initiated into the world of magic and sorcery his true form was embroiled in, would not realise the influence he had over his creator. Creator. . . Yue winced. His mind was running in circles tonight, always back to his beloved master, and then in turn. . . hold that thought. He was here to enjoy the quiet atmosphere and absorb the healing magic of the moon, *not* to angst over his. . . well. . . Yukito's. . . *relationship* with his mistress's onnichan. san. Yue put a lot of effort into making the thought sarcastic, but it came out, as always, as slightly wistful. Guilty, even. He sighed. And that was the other reason he left his false form's dreams alone. There was something mortifyingly embarrassing about witnessing any of his false form's fantasies. Whenever he had done so it felt as if he was intruding on something too personal for his eyes, absurdly: weren't he and Yukito supposed to be the same person? A ghost of a smile flitted over his lips. It's always *false form* when you don't want to be associated with him, isn't it? But those are as much your dreams as his. That is why you look away. That was something Yue was reluctant to acknowledge, even to himself.
He sat down, feeling restless. The night's calm had drained away. This always seemed to happen. He would begin meditating in the cool night air, and then all these thoughts and feelings and memories would seep in to ruin it for him. And of course, it was all mixed up in his head with the anguish of coming to terms with his old master's death, centuries ago for the rest of the world, but only months for him. He missed the warm blue eyes - blue could be warm, warmer than gold and red and orange, the colours of Keroberos's armour. Yue knew no armour that could protect you from memories, though. . . only Yukito's protection, forgetfulness. And hard as it was, cold as it was, he did not want to forget the past.
Instead, he wished for the cold to envelop his heart and steal the pain away, but it wasn't going to happen, not when everyone seemed to have a foothold in Yukito's heart and therefore, however unwillingly, in his own. Was he unwilling? Yue squeezed his eyes and senses shut to try and will the confusion away.
He sat there for a long time, lost in thought, then tiredly, finally, he got to his feet. He would return to Yukito's form. There was absolutely no point in staying like this. Sakura was in no trouble, he was not called upon for action, and he didn't want to be alone with himself anymore. . . Perhaps he should have fought harder at the judgement, past the point where he had been defeated. He could have fought beyond that, destroying any hope of assuming this new role, this new life, but go back to sleep and reimmerse himself in the clarity of memories of the old. Perhaps there was nothing for him now but confusion. The guardian was about to transform, when he heard someone trudging up the path. He instantly sprang into the air, a defensive move, sending his mane of shimmering hair whipping about his face. Despite this, he could make out the growling figure below him plainly enough. What the. . . ? Touya? _____________________________________________________________________
The vocab:
Iie - empathic 'no', and probably used in the wrong context here; 'chigau' might have been more suitable. Onnichan - 'big brother', familiar term Onnisan - 'big brother', polite term Gomen nasai - very sorry Arigatou - thank you Ano - my favourite word, 'umm.' Ohayo - hello Minna-chan - everyone
I usually stick author's notes at the end of my stories. . . 'usually' being the couple of times I've posted any, eheh. . . but, what can I say? It's Touya. It's Yue. It's fluff. Non-explicit fluff, but fluff nonetheless. With the occasional thinking-point thrown in where I could find one. o_0 Also a very short chapter, in order to accumulate more reviews over the entire fic (hint^_^)
For better fics, read those written by my favourite authors on ff.net, namely Dr Megalomania, MorganD, and Suppichan. Oh - especially try to read the following by Dr Megalomania: she wants to reach 400 reviews in her fic 'In this tainted soul. . . there lies hope' so in the name of writer's solidarity, folks, please go and help her!
These characters are not mine, but CLAMP'S. If you did not know this, you have probably entered the wrong fanfiction domain, but - stay anyway, and please R this contains shounen-ai (non-explicit male-male relationship), if this offends you I suggest you do not read this or indeed fics of mine containing Yue, Yukito and Touya. . . i.e. any of them.
^_o Enjoy! _____________________________________________________________________
Sleeping. . .
Full moon tonight, simply perfect. . . There was no-one about to disturb his rooftop contemplation of the glorious night sky. Sunset had long faded into the deepest, most spacious expanse of stars he had seen since moving to this populated area, a great canopy of stars, dominated, tonight, by the moon's full glowing face.
It was tempting to take to the air and escape the dim glow of the streetlamps beneath his feet, dive ever closer to the shining orb, but. . . in the deserted street and calm air the streetlamps were unobtrusive, the air sweet and cool and refreshing. And the scene was wonderfully, blessedly free of interruptions. . .
Then Yue frowned. He didn't need anyone to interrupt him when part of his subconscious was embodied by Yukito, his false-form and cheerful expert on all things culinary. He'd be willing to bet the snow bunny was dreaming about food again. . . of course, he didn't need to bet: Yue could take a peak at Yukito's dreams any time he chose, and in the past had often done so. After all, they were, technically speaking, different aspects of the same person. However, lately he'd refrained from doing this, partly because Yukito would soon start to realise that the exchange operated both ways. . . It was ridiculous! He was tip-toeing mentally, around his own false-form. It wasn't as if Yukito had any direct control over Yue at all: sharing memories and thoughts were one thing, but the snow rabbit had no ability to create false memories, as Yue had done for him, nor any hold over the transformation process. Yue could simply wipe him out of existence if he became too troublesome, and incorporate his thoughts and feelings back into his own psyche. Sometimes he thought he might. . . But. . . Yue hesitated to do this. Yukito was a part of the community here, accepted and trusted and liked by those surrounding his mistress. Yue was, in fact, despite his magical powers and duty to Sakura-sama, much more of an outsider than his false form.
And besides, Yue didn't deny that he was fond of Yukito, not quite in the same way a parent loves a child - for in many senses, Yukito was more experienced than he was - but he did care for him, in an odd way. His old master, the magician Clow Reed, had always considered his creations with the utmost care, and he would nurture them to their highest potential once they were realised. To Yue's knowledge, Clow had never, ever destroyed any of his creations, even when they turned out differently than he had intended. Life wasn't easy to grant and it shouldn't be easy to take away. So Yue left Yukito alone and hoped that the snow bunny, newly initiated into the world of magic and sorcery his true form was embroiled in, would not realise the influence he had over his creator. Creator. . . Yue winced. His mind was running in circles tonight, always back to his beloved master, and then in turn. . . hold that thought. He was here to enjoy the quiet atmosphere and absorb the healing magic of the moon, *not* to angst over his. . . well. . . Yukito's. . . *relationship* with his mistress's onnichan. san. Yue put a lot of effort into making the thought sarcastic, but it came out, as always, as slightly wistful. Guilty, even. He sighed. And that was the other reason he left his false form's dreams alone. There was something mortifyingly embarrassing about witnessing any of his false form's fantasies. Whenever he had done so it felt as if he was intruding on something too personal for his eyes, absurdly: weren't he and Yukito supposed to be the same person? A ghost of a smile flitted over his lips. It's always *false form* when you don't want to be associated with him, isn't it? But those are as much your dreams as his. That is why you look away. That was something Yue was reluctant to acknowledge, even to himself.
He sat down, feeling restless. The night's calm had drained away. This always seemed to happen. He would begin meditating in the cool night air, and then all these thoughts and feelings and memories would seep in to ruin it for him. And of course, it was all mixed up in his head with the anguish of coming to terms with his old master's death, centuries ago for the rest of the world, but only months for him. He missed the warm blue eyes - blue could be warm, warmer than gold and red and orange, the colours of Keroberos's armour. Yue knew no armour that could protect you from memories, though. . . only Yukito's protection, forgetfulness. And hard as it was, cold as it was, he did not want to forget the past.
Instead, he wished for the cold to envelop his heart and steal the pain away, but it wasn't going to happen, not when everyone seemed to have a foothold in Yukito's heart and therefore, however unwillingly, in his own. Was he unwilling? Yue squeezed his eyes and senses shut to try and will the confusion away.
He sat there for a long time, lost in thought, then tiredly, finally, he got to his feet. He would return to Yukito's form. There was absolutely no point in staying like this. Sakura was in no trouble, he was not called upon for action, and he didn't want to be alone with himself anymore. . . Perhaps he should have fought harder at the judgement, past the point where he had been defeated. He could have fought beyond that, destroying any hope of assuming this new role, this new life, but go back to sleep and reimmerse himself in the clarity of memories of the old. Perhaps there was nothing for him now but confusion. The guardian was about to transform, when he heard someone trudging up the path. He instantly sprang into the air, a defensive move, sending his mane of shimmering hair whipping about his face. Despite this, he could make out the growling figure below him plainly enough. What the. . . ? Touya? _____________________________________________________________________
The vocab:
Iie - empathic 'no', and probably used in the wrong context here; 'chigau' might have been more suitable. Onnichan - 'big brother', familiar term Onnisan - 'big brother', polite term Gomen nasai - very sorry Arigatou - thank you Ano - my favourite word, 'umm.' Ohayo - hello Minna-chan - everyone
I usually stick author's notes at the end of my stories. . . 'usually' being the couple of times I've posted any, eheh. . . but, what can I say? It's Touya. It's Yue. It's fluff. Non-explicit fluff, but fluff nonetheless. With the occasional thinking-point thrown in where I could find one. o_0 Also a very short chapter, in order to accumulate more reviews over the entire fic (hint^_^)
For better fics, read those written by my favourite authors on ff.net, namely Dr Megalomania, MorganD, and Suppichan. Oh - especially try to read the following by Dr Megalomania: she wants to reach 400 reviews in her fic 'In this tainted soul. . . there lies hope' so in the name of writer's solidarity, folks, please go and help her!