Chapter 1
BPOV
As I begin to think back to the good ol` days, I realize that I'm not really missing out on much. It's not that I hate my new life, its more like I am at a loss as to how to carry on. The way I look at it I could do two things: find the one person who would make this experience a lot better or I could live on my own and find my own coven. I personally am leaning towards the latter option just because I'm a coward. At times like this my EX-love would tell me that I don't see myself correctly but now I know that everything he said was just like a script for him. Making me think he loved me then ripping my heart out. In a round-about way what happened to me to make me this way could be blamed on him and his acting.
I remember the last three years of existence perfectly. Moving in with Charlie. My first day at Forks High. The first time I saw Edward (even just thinking his name makes me tremble). It took awhile but me and him eventually became an item. Everything about him was perfect. His hair. His eyes. His build.....EVERYTHING! He never agreed with me that he was perfect. He thought of himself as a monster. We knew everything about each other. I knew stuff about him that only few knew. Like how when he was hungry his eyes turned a smoldering onyx and when he was full they were back to their original caramel color. Like how when he is mad or agitated he pinches the bridge of his nose with enough pressure to turn rocks to dust. I also know that he is a Vampire....I also remember other life-altering events such as the baseball game where I met Victoria, James, and Laurent. The Ballet studio where Edward fought for me. And then a few months later when he left me for good.
Eventually all of that lead to where I am today. I am the one thing he never wanted me to be. One of his kind. That is why I don't want to go and find the Cullens. Although they were my second family they left me and that hurt. People say that the transformation from human to Vampire is the most painful experience ever. Well to me it was nothing compared to the pain of the person you loved, your life, leaving you saying that he didn't love you anymore.
I remember the day that I was changed. I went to work like every other Saturday, except this time I felt as if I was being watched but I never gave it a second thought. Even if I would have worried about it the outcome would still be the same for I was no match for Victoria and Laurent. I assume they watched me go through my day at work at the publishing company I was working at. Then I guess they followed me home where they found me in my room going over stuff that interns go over. I sat there staring at my Mac Book when next thing I know I'm slammed against the wall and feel pain in both my wrists and neck. Then 3 days later I awake in my room but everything seemed more focused and brighter and when I saw my reflection I knew exactly what had happened. I had been bit by not one but two vampires.
If what had happened to me would have happened to anyone else they surely would have freaked out; but to me it was a blessing, what I have always wanted. Edward would have never changed me. It was the one thing I wanted that he never gave to me. The only thing that bothered me after the change was what would happen to Charlie and Renee? They had both been there to help me through the break up with Edward and we had all grown closer, kinda like a actual family. They will surely be heartbroken to learn that their only daughter is "dead".
Back to the present, I'm sitting in a restaurant looking at the people walk by. Soon after my change I learned that as long as I fed immediately before, I could be around humans. It is hard but it is how I plan on learning my self control. For some reason I think this would be easier to do if I had one person I could confide in. As I sit there wallowing in my own self pity I start to hear the conversations of the men around me. They are all whispering things back and forth about me that their mothers would highly disapprove of. After about 20 more minutes I decide that it is time to go. I get up from my table and gracefully walk to the exit. As soon as I step out side a man around the age of 24 approaches me and said "Hey there. I see your here alone does that mean that I can have you for myself?" The man was around 189 and had ugly brown patches of hair EVERYWHERE that was visible. I better scram and fast. "Actually I was just here with my boyfriend he had to leave early for a business meeting.", was what I said to the pedophile looking man. He simply replied, "Kay." and then walked away, As I turned to leave I caught a scent that was all too familiar and brought back memories that all but burned during my Senior year.