Shin's Random Pairing Interview~

=INTERVIEW 1 ver. Shingeki no Kyojin=

This is not a story. This is not a tale. But this is definitely fiction. And I'm undeniably a fan.

Hello everyone! I welcome you all to my written talk show: Shin's Random Pairing Interview~as the name suggests, I'm Shin but sorry to disappoint. I'm not the guy from Amnesia. Seriously. It just turned out that my name translation is the same as him. But! Let's not brood over that fact and move on to what this is all about.

Random Pairing Interview. Meaning, I'll interview all sorta pairing everyone's buzzing about- straight, yaoi, yuri and even out of this world pairings. And ask them the same five questions ( different set of questions for different pairs) a fan wants to know. So, I'd like to welcome my audience- yes, it's you. And also the friends of the characters I've invited to join in this... whatever you call it. xD

P.S. there are no or little actions contained here since this is like a script form or drama cd form. I'd like everyone to rely on their imaginative skills for this. =u=

\words contained in * are little actions

\words contained in / are little reactions

Without further ado~ let's start!

Shin: okay... our first ever pairing to be interviewed today is -gawd. I'm nervous. Drumroll please! *opens le envelope* ohwait. I'll give clues. Hehehe.

Bare. /ohmygod!/

Cutters.

Killers.

Squinty-eyed.

And a Lizard.

Tadadada! Riere! From the most popular recent anime today, Shingeki no Kyojin!

Yes. This is a yaoi pairing peeps. If ya don't like, don't continue.

On the blue corner! He is clearly defined by "small but terrible" The strongest soldier of humanity! The sadist clean freak of a heichou, Lance Corporal Rivaille! *spotlight on Rivaille* /kyaaaa. Heichou! Suteki desu!/

On the red corner! His childhood was tainted with brutality. The soldier paired with revenge! The masochist crybaby of a titan shifter, Eren Jaeger! *spotlight on Eren* /kyaaaa. Eren-chii! Show us some muscle!/

And they are known in the fandom world as Riere or Ereri!

Let's sit down first, gentlemen (?) xD Hello the both of you. It's an honor to you know, interview the most hot pairing of the yaoi world today. =u=

Rivaille: Who the fuck cares? Why am I even in this piece of shit anyway? And what's with my introduction? I'll accept being a clean freak but never am I a fucking sadist.

Shin: Well, we have no choice since that's your character, heichou. That's why we've invited Eren and some guests to talk about that later. So, Eren, any first words?

Eren: ugh. Well. Th-thank you for i-inviting me here today. It's my first time here so-

Rivaille: Nervous already? Damn brat.

Eren: I-I'm not! I just don't accept the masochist crybaby part...

Rivaille: ha! Though I'd gladly narrate how you'd whine at be-

Eren: waaah! Look who's talking! Shin-san, you forgot to add in his introduction how bad his mouth is!

Rivaille: my mouth is bad? Do you really think that way, Eren? /faints/

Eren: ... *blushes*

Shin: o-ho~ love is in the air around here folks! I can already feel the S & M sensation starting from my nape. xD And so, before anyone could faint, let's move on to the five questions since we're also time restricted. First up! *opens le first question envelope* If you guys were dating, do you think you're compatible with each other? And who do you think is the other option to that question? Rivaille, you first.

Rivaille: tch. What a meddlesome question. Well, lizard brat may be weak and a crybaby but that's exactly why we're compatible, IF we are dating. *smirks* Plus, he looks easy to possess since he follows my every command. Like EVERY command, just like a fucking dog. Other option huh? Let's see... everyone else is shitty so I'd choose the lesser shit. And by that, I mean Petra.

Shin: oh...*whispers* heichou-san, your mouth is really bad... OKAY. I felt a sudden chill through my bones so I'll stop. Just a follow-up, why Petra?

Rivaille: I already said that she's lesser of a shit. What? Do you expect me to choose Hanji instead? *glances at Eren* well, Petra looks pretty unlike someone, we've been together longer unlike someone and she' damn good at fighting WITH THINKING FAST FIRST UNLIKE SOMEONE. /ooohh/

Shin: *gulp* th-that was intense...ha-ha-ha. So, what about you Eren?

Eren: Is that even a question?! Me and heichou are certainly NOT compatible! *pouts* since I need someone to rely on! Someone strong, cool, good-looking and I personally prefer black hair. Oh! But I like someone shorter than me.

Shin: And by that... do you mean Rivaille?

Eren: wah?! Nooooo.

Shin: Since the characteristics you mentioned are that of either heichou-san over here ORRR Mikasa but Mikasa doesn't seem to fit the last description. Kufufufu.

Rivaille: hey!

Eren: ... *blushes*

Shin: anyway, who's your other option? I'm guessing the one I mentioned earlier since you like "black"hair. Sadly, it's not short this time.

Rivaille: damn you. I'm still fucking here you know. And Eren could justify that I'm not at all short. /kyaaa. Heichou! You're so aggressive!/

Shin: I certainly don't want to know the details though... ANYWAY, Eren, your answer?

Eren: *glances at Rivaille* I prefer blonde actually! Petra-san is pretty but Krista-san is more so! since Armin said that she's like a goddess. AND she's nice UNLIKE SOMEONE.

Rivaille: Hah.

Shin: okay. god. It's only the first question and I'm getting a heatstroke already... well then, here's QUESTION #2 * opens le second envelope* then again, if you guys are dating, who would you get jealous of and why? Heichou answered first in the first question so it's your turn now Eren.

Eren: w-why would I get jealous of someone close to heichou? Bu-but, if you guys insist... I think it's... Erwin-san. datte! He's really close with heichou and he looks like he knows a lot about him. I guess...

Shin: sou nee... they really look close right? *arrow shot to Eren* And they're like captain and vice-captain! *another arrow shot* Plus, they trust each other so much. *fatality arrow shot* how more jealous can you get! xD before you answer heichou, any reaction about that? Is it true that Erwin knows a lot about you?

Rivaille: you could say that...but tell Eren that if he wants to know something about me, I'll gladly tell him everything. Though, I'm no asshole to say things without a price. /we'll be waiting for your advances, heichou!/

Shin: so, there you have it Eren! Rivaille is willing to tell you everything about himself. Lucky~ let's now hear his side:

Rivaille: Is there really a need to put it into words? It's obvious that I'm going to be jealous of that shitty kid Mikasa. Hell. I hate those overly clingy types. But of course, before I get drowned by my damn jealousy, I'll annihilate those who get in my way.

Shin: yikes. There's gonna be a blood bath later. Since Eren-chii is speechless over here, let's not waste time and move on to QUESTION #3* opens le 3rd envelope* : If ever things got worse and you got married to your other option in #1, what would be the baby's name and why?* looks at Eren* ah... heichou, I think you should still be the one to answer...

Rivaille: hmmm... I want to have a son and I'll name him EDWIN. Japanese names are now cliché so a foreigner type would be a nice choice.

Shin: ^THAT sounded like bait... Eren, your side?

Eren: hmph! I want to have a daughter because a boy might grow up like someone bad-ass. And I'll name her MIKAN. You know, it's a Japanese term for orange. Since, I like orange! It's almost the color of our uniform!

Shin: ANDDD there he goes, catching the bait...

Rivaille: what a retarded naming sense you have there. Well, what would I expect from a shitty brat like you?

Eren: wh-what's retarded about it?! I think "Edwin" sounds a lot worse! Because you just derived that from a certain someone!

Rivaille: oh really? Don't lump me in with you and your jealousy.

Eren: wh-wha! I-I'm no-

*sudden ring*

Eren: what the hell's that?

Shin: oohh. I didn't notice the time. In this segment, except for the five questions, two of your cast members would personally ask a different question each because they can observe the two of you more than us. And so, let's welcome Hanji-san and Armin-san!

Armin: Hello.

Hanji: Ya-ho minna! Okay, I'll go on ahead since I still have to get back to Sawney and Bean . /Hanji, you're epic!/

Shin: anou... they're already dead though...

Hanji: yosh Rivaille! Here's my awesome question: Why do you always like to clean things up like a freak?

Shin: well, THAT indeed is an interesting question

Rivaille: tch. Isn't it obvious? Because I want to be the only one to MESS with the things I own. / O;-;O /

Hanji: o-ho. That sure is getting me hyped up to investigate about. Anyway, good luck Eren! Ciao!

Shin: whew. I didn't expect that answer. You certainly are smart, Rivaille. Thank you for that question, Hanji-san and now its Armin's turn.

Armin: ah. Hai! This is a question for Eren. If you were seriously injured and a titan will almost eat you-

Shin: *whispers* he has already been eaten though... you know, the time when he saved you...

Armin: *clears throat* who do you think you will unconsciously call out for?

Shin: shit. I wish he really did call someone's name back then and also the times he was saved. Armin, nice job! *thumbs up*

Eren: ugh. Heichou. Since it's UNCONSCIOUSLY and ONLY because I'm quite adapted to always say his name...

Rivaille: Then you finally spit it out. Little crybaby or should I say my princess? *smirks* Since, I always saved you like a knight and shining cape.

Shin: Is that a joke? Pffft.

Armin: It doesn't suit you, corporal...

Eren: WHY do you always treat me like this? I'm NOT A DAMN PRINCESS. E-especially not yours!

Rivaille: *playback of ep. 22* what are you saying again?

Eren: ...

Armin: ah... I think I'll bring bad news to MIKA- ehem-N. Never mind. I have to go now because I promised Jean to accompany him for dinner. See ya, Eren! / we smell another pairing!/

Shin: Anddd that concludes our special question portion. Aw. Too bad we didn't invite Mikasa, Krista, Petra or Erwin. :I But no matter! The show must go on! And by that, *opens le 4th envelope* here's QUESTION # 4: What gift will you give to each other's birthday and how will you give it? Eren first.

Eren: hmmm...I'll give him a mop and a broom!

Rivaille: hah?!

Eren: I mean, maybe I'll give him a set of modern clothes since I want to see him wearing one. Oh, but before that I'll invite him to an Onsen because he really likes to be clean . Ehehehe...also, if it's a hot spring bath, I can also get to see him-

Shin: naked?

Eren: what the?! NO. In a yukata! Jeez...

Shin: ooh... how about you, Rivaille?

Rivaille: Shit this is endless. Let's see... I'd first invite him to go skiing or whatever, as long as it's adventurous. Then, I'd give him a ring on top of some mountain. Because it's skiing. You know how he's been babbling about how he fucking wants to see what's outside the walls. So, if it's on top of a mountain, the view is great. I think I'd also bring a hanky and be ready to lend my shoulders since he'd cry.

Shin: oh cut it out. That's really sweet so it's so unlike you :3 tell us that you're dating already not that it has been obviousss. Yosh. The last question, before I see blood splatter from noses everywhere... *opens le last envelope* ohmy! Jaa... QUESTION # 5: Who gets to top who and how would you do IT when you're doing IT. Ohcrap. My fan heart. *coughcough* I don't wanna die early so Eren first again.

Eren: holy mackerel. Where did you get all of these questions?! Especially THAT.

Shin: hohoho~ from... myself and other sources xD

Eren: do I really have to?

Shin: uh... yes.

Eren: ...ah...erm...gah! I give up! I'll go with whatever heichou answers. I can't take this anymoreee *teary eyes*

Shin: okay! okay ! I don't want to be sued or killed for making you cry! You heard that, heichou-san! You have to take responsibility.

Rivaille: weak as usual, Eren. I told you that I'd gladly narrate it but I'll make it short since you're about to cry. Of course, I'll be the top. Can you even imagine how can he make an advance considering THAT *points at Eren* situation? As if I'll let some kid fuck me. And you're asking how'd I do it? I'll kiss him, make him crazy about me, touch his everything then in-censored- / kyaaaa /

Eren: waahh! Heichou! Yamero!

*and they left as Eren chased Rivaille to the depths of the walls* xD

Shin: Wow. Well, I think I've heard enough of the revelations. I personally ship Riere though. Bwahaha xD all hail canon pairings! I leave the actions and imaginations to all of you. – bows-

Thanks minna-san! 'till next random time!

\credits to some of my friends for suggesting some of the questions C: