This is the story of Mr Bonk. Mr Bonk is one of the Mr Men. He is a dirty blue colour and he has a large bump in his trousers which he likes to bonk people with.
Mr Bonk lives in Soholand, which is a very blue place indeed. There are lots of shops in Soholand selling lots and lots of different things. Toys, blue movies and even blue underwear with frilly bits on.
Mr Bonk likes to take walks down the main street of Sohotown, which is the bluest town in Soholand. He likes to look at the people in the shop windows in Sohotown, and he also likes to visit people for an hour, or sometimes two hours, depending on how much money and stamina he has.
A few weeks ago, Mr Bonk met Little Miss Lady Lumps. Mr Bonk liked Little Miss Lady Lumps and Little Miss Lady Lumps liked Mr Bonk. Mr Bonk bonked Little Miss Lady Lumps several times, and Little Miss Lady Lumps screamed Mr Bonk's name very loudly several times.
Mr Bonk thought a lot about Little Miss Lady Lumps, and sometimes Mr Bonk had little accidents in his bed at night because he thought about Little Miss Lady Lumps so much.
Mr Bonk had not seen Little Miss Lady Lumps for several weeks, so he decided to pay her a visit. He thought she might like a bonk or two, as they had not seen each other for a while.
So Mr Bonk set off for Little Miss Lady Lumps house. He was quite excited, and the bump in his trousers seemed to be a little larger than normal today. On the way he met two of his friends, Little Miss Fun and Little Miss Naughty. Mr Bonk liked bonking his two friends very much.
"Fancy a good time?" asked Little Miss Naughty with a smile.
"Yes please!" said Mr Bonk.
So Mr Bonk, Little Miss Naughty and Little Miss fun rented a room in Sohotown for an hour and had a good time. Mr Bonk bonked Little Miss Naughty while Little Miss Fun watched and took photographs, then Little Miss Fun said she was hungry so Mr Bonk gave her some of his sausage to eat, and then he gave her some of his cream.
After their hour was up, Mr Bonk said goodbye to Miss Naughty and Miss Fun and set off again on his way to Little Miss Lady Lumps' house.
He almost ran all the way and knocked loudly on the door when he arrived.
The door was opened by Little Miss Lady Lumps.
"Hello Mr Bonk!" Said Little Miss Lady Lumps.
"Hello Miss Lady Lumps!" said Mr Bonk with a gleam in his eye. But then he noticed something different about her.
"I've changed my name since I saw you last." said Miss Lady Lumps. "I'm not Miss Lady Lumps any more. Now I'm called Miss Lump"
Miss Lump opened the door fully and Mr Bonk saw that shed had a big lump in her tummy.
"How did that happen?" asked Mr Bonk.
"It was too much bonking." replied Miss Lump. "But my husband says it wasn't his bonking that gave me the lump as he had an operation to stop him giving ladies lumps"
"Your husband?" asked Mr Bonk. "Who's that"
"Me!" said Mr Angry very loudly form behind Miss Lump. "What did you do to my wife, Mr Bonk"
"Nothing!" said Mr Bonk, noticing the evil look in Mr Angry's eyes and the golf club in his hand.
"You'd better be going now." Said Mr Angry. "Or else"
"OK, I'm going!" said Mr Bonk.
"Not without me, you're not!" Said Miss Lump.
"What?" shouted Mr Angry.
"Mr Bonk is much more fun than you are," said Miss Lump, "and he bonks better than you ever will! I'm leaving you"
So Mr Bonk and Little Miss Lump ran as fast as they could all the way back to Mr Bonk's bachelor pad, and they all lived happily ever after. (Except Mr Angry, who was never happy whatever happened).