Another Cliche
"My name is Cassie. I can't tell you my last name because....blah, blah, blah. God! I'm tired of the same old stuff. For once, I'm not going to say it."
And what do you think you are doing?
"Oh, no..." not another fanfic writer.
He he he he!!!! Yes, it is I......hey, does this bold type make me look important?
"No, actually, it makes you look just like other stupid fanfic writers who write these cliche things." Marco says coming in with Jake, Rachel, Tobias and Ax. "Oh, I'm not dissing Steve-0, he's cool."
"Hey!" Jake yells," Why did we all come in at the same time? Do you have any imagination at all?"
Geeze, sorry. I just wanted to get you on the page quickly.
< Yea, well you could have made it more interesting.> Tobias grumbled,
Man, what crawled up your ass and died? And how can you say it's boring with me. I've only written one other story.
"Oh yea, The Smurf." Marco replied sarcastically." How can we forget that one? YOU KILLED ME!!!! What is with killing me? You and that stupid Andalite Girl are always bumping me off."
Don't insult Andalite Girl! And, I only killed you because you were the only character who would fit into my plot.
< Great Plot. I did off with Marco then fled to Mexico.>Tobias grumbled,< The only good part was that I was surrounded by women in bathing suits.> Tobias smiles wickedly.
"And what's up with me twitching? I don't twitch." Rachel added.
Would you all SHUT UP!!!! Okay, I'm getting control of this story. I'm the writer.
< Is that what you call your self? > Tobias quietly adds.
OKAY! That's enough from you Bird-Boy. First I'm morphing you to human.
< What the....>
"Hey, I'm human."
Now I'm going to speed up time in the story.
"Can you do that?" Jake asks.
< She can do anything, Prince Jake. She is the writer. > Ax answers.
Thank you Ax. You will not be punished in THIS story.
Now I will add that totally cliche line....
"Don't call me prince..."Jake says.
"Hey, I didn't want to say that!"
Thank God. I have you in my control! Now, to coin a phrase, LET THE GAMES BEGIN!!!
"Games? What do you think this is Monopoly or Uno?" Marco asks.
You dirty little boy. Take that.
Instantly, duck tape appears over Marco's mouth and he is tied to a chair.
"Whahumm! Lemm meee gohhhh!!! Yu mmmmhhh funnnchfffffff!!!!!"
Marco! What language! I'll keep you like that for a while till you calm down.
"What did you do that for?" Cassie asks.
He said a bad word.
"All he said was Monopoly and Uno." Tobias adds.
Tobias is suddenly gagged and tied to a chair along with Marco.
Now, could you please explain why you are tying people up?" Jake demands.
I told you. They said a bad word.
"What? Monopoly? Unnnn." Cassie put her hand over Jake's mouth.
"Shut up. That's the bad word." Cassie whispers.
You learn fast, Cassie. That is the bad word. I know it only means one. But, in my mixed up little world it is very bad. So is uno-stack-o. That's the worst. Do you understand yet?
Everyone nods "no".
Well, I'm not going to explain.
"mahhh. Yu suffff!" Marco tried to yell.
What was that my dear sweet Marco?
" I saff...Yu suck....hey I'm free." Marco stood up relieved. "Thanks! Did I mention you're the best fanfic writer in the world?"
Sit down and shut up before I make you fall in love with Rachel.
"OH, please. I'm sick of those kinds of stories." Rachel grumbles. "And why don't I have more lines in this dumb story thing?"
Sorry. I forgot about you. Don't worry. You are a main character in my next story.
"Yea!" Rachel falsely exclaims.
Shut up. Oh, earlier I said I'm going to speed up time in this story. So hold on for a sec.
Everything spins for a sec then slows down.
"What was that.." Marco's gasps.
I just sped up time in this story by two hours. So, now, Tobias, you are stuck as a human forever.
"WHAT!" Tobias screams.
You heard me. And now, something to really make you pissed.
Marco suddenly grabs Rachel and gives her one of those big kisses you see in the movies.
"Aaaahhhhh!!!!"Tobias screams.
Hey! Tobias! How about a pillow. Ah, never mind. I don't want to do a repeat of the Smurf.
"Neither do I" Marco says. " It isn't pleasant being suffocated by a pillow."
I imagine it's not. I'm going to have to end this cliche. It's not very good.
"No, It's not." Tobias adds, still steamed.
Okay. I'm going to do away with you. First... Oh, don't worry, you'll be back. It will only hurt for a little while.
Suddenly a Taxx.....
Hey! I know! He he he.
Suddenly there's a flash of light. And out of it steps a lone figure.
How's this for cliche? I stepped into my own story. Now, say good-bye, Tobias.
Knowing what is going to happen Tobias frowns and says good-bye.
Brat Girl shoots him with a dracon beam.....no, make that a 40-calaber rifle...no, an atom bomb....no.....
"GET ON WITH THE STORY!" Tobias screams, yet again." KILL ME ALREADY!"
Okay. Okay. I'll just........
Brat Girl reaches into the air and a needle and vile appears.
In this vile is a very dangerous poison. It is concocted of stuff I found when I snuck into the science lab to free the frogs.
Brat Girl fills the needle full of the poison. Rases the needle high and plunges it deep into Tobias. Tobias cry's out and falls to the ground stone dead.
Rachel faints.
"I've never seen Rachel faint before." Marco says.
I didn't want her opinion. Well, that wasn't too cliche, I haven't seen a story where the author killed off someone with poison. But, hey, I'm probably wrong.
Now, let me introduce my friends.....Andalite Girl and Veggie Freak!!!
From somewhere there is the sound of applause. It lasts only a few seconds.
Cheap special effects.
Out of another ray of lights two more people appear.
"Okay. I know Anadlite Girl. But who is this Veggie person?" Jake asks.
Veggie Freak has only written one story. More are on the way.
"So what are they doing here?" Cassie demands.
"Why, to kill you of course." Andalite Girl says evilly and advances towards the Animorphs.
"Oh, no! Not a torture story! I hate those!" Marco groans.
"Were not going to torture you." Veggie Freak replies. "We're going to kill you real quick so we can get to bed. Brat Girl writes these stories way to late at night.
It's only a little after midnight. You can sleep tomorrow. I wanted to give you the honors of killing two of these guys.
"Great!" Andalite Girl says gleefully."Can you get *N'SYNC in this story?"
Sorry. You can write about *N'SYNC. I want to get my ratings higher, not have people want to kill be because I totally dissed their fave group.
Okay, now, back to business. Andalite Girl, kill Marco. Veggie, you get Ax.
< Hey! I thought you said you were going to leave me alone. > Ax demands.
Oh I did didn't I? Sorry. hmmm....okay, I got it.....I said I wouldn't punish you.....but I'm just killing you....there's a difference.
< That's not fair! > Ax yells.
Sorry.
"I can't believe you're letting Veggie Freak kill Ax." Andalite girl said.
"You're killing Marco, you stupid hoe." Veggie Freak replied."It's only fair."
You guys stop arguing. Get it over with. I want to go to bed.
"Okay, Okay."
Andalite Girl quickly tied Marco to a chair and gagged him. She then put some headphones over his ears and turned the cd player on.
Marco's eyes went wide and he tried to scream.
What are you making him listen to?
"What else? *N'SYNC." Andalite Girl smiles wickedly.
"That's cruel." Veggie Freak adds disgusted. "When's it my turn?"
Just a sec.
Andalite Girl unplugs the headphones and then unties Marco. She then picks up a dracon beam, fires it at Marco's head, then gleefully laughs as he drops down dead.
"Your turn." She smiles at Veggie Freak.
Veggie Freak snaps _____(I'm not telling you Veggie Freak's gender, find out yourself) fingers and in a flash, Ax turns into a super model, well.....an andalite super model.
"NO!!!!!!!!!"Andalite Girl screams.
This is interesting.
After a few minutes of letting Ax parade around in a dress and high heels. Veggie Freak turns Ax back into himself.
Then smiling evilly. Veggie Freak causes a big tub of boiling oil to appear and quickly makes Ax jump in.
There is a few very unpleasant sounds then silence.
Well, I don't need you anymore. You guys can go now.
Brat Girl snaps her fingers and Andalite Girl and Veggie Freak disappear.
Now who's left. Aww.....Jake, Cassie and Rachel.
Brat Girl ties them to a chair.
I better make this quick.
Brat Girl thinks for a minute then grabs a few pieces of TNT, lights the fuses, lays one on each of their laps and runs for cover.
BOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well, that's that. Now I can go to bed.
Brat Girl stands up and stretches. "That was fun" she says out loud. She quickly saves and prepares to shut down the computer.
Just before the computer goes off....from deep inside the computer an evil little laugh is heard......
"Sweet dreams Brat Girl.......Till we meet again..........pray for your safety.......