*That was it,* Amanda Stetson thought to herself as she slowly made her way downstairs. This was the third morning in a row that she was sick. *Maybe I should call the doctor,* she thought reluctantly. She convinced herself that it could be just the stomach flu. She walked into the kitchen to fix herself some breakfast. When she entered she still smelled the remnants of her family's breakfast in the air. She paled and decided that breakfast was definitely out of the question. She poured some juice and decided that maybe she'd better make an appointment with the doctor after all.

Later that morning, Amanda sat in her Doctor's office in a state of shock unable to believe what she'd just heard.

"Are you sure?" She asked, stunned.

"Yes, Amanda," the doctor answered confidently. "You are six weeks pregnant."

"Oh my gosh!"She exclaimed softly, her mind spinning in a million different directions at once. How was she going to tell her husband the news? Or her mother and the boys? She and Lee were the only ones who knew of their marriage with the exception of her ex-husband, Joe. *That's it,* she thought decisively. *Joe's the only one who knows all the information. I'll ask him for advice.* That settled she rose to her feet to leave. "Thanks, Doctor," She said, shaking his hand.

"Make sure you make an appointment to see me for next month on your way out, "He reminded her.

"I will, "she answered absentmindedly, having more on her mind than making an appointment.

About an hour later, she was sitting at her desk in the Q Bureau talking to Joe on the phone.

"Hi, Joe. How are you?"

"Hi, Amanda," Joe replied. "What's up?"

"Not much." *Where to begin?* She couldn't just blurt it out over the telephone. "Look, are you busy for lunch?" That would give her time to think about what she'd say.

"What's wrong?" Is there something wrong with Phillip or Jamie?" He asked apprehensively.

"No, they're fine." she reassured him quickly. "It's got nothing to do with the boys. I just - I need to talk to you."

"Are you all right? You sound funny."

"I'm fine! She laughed uncomfortably. "I just need your advice on something, that's all. It's pretty important." She bit her lip nervously, hoping he wouldn't say no.

Even though they'd been divorced for a few years he knew her well enough to know that there was something wrong, despite her objections to the contrary. "All right," He said calmly, not wanting to upset her right now. "I'm free for lunch."

She smiled in relief. "Great! About 12:30 at Dooley's?"

He checked his calendar. "How about 1:00. I have a meeting at 11:30 and I don't know if I'll be finished by 12:30."

"1:00 is fine." She sighed gratefully, glad they could get this over with as soon as possible. "Thanks for agreeing to meet me. I'm sorry it's such short notice."

Lee walked into the room, smiling when he saw Amanda. She looked up with panic in her eyes. "I've gotta go," She said nervously. "Lee's here." She hung up abruptly.

Joe stared into the telephone in puzzlement, wondering just WHAT was going on. Why on earth did she have to hang up the phone when Lee came in? He couldn't wait until lunch time now.

"What was that all about?" Lee asked curiously at his wife's unusual behavior.

"Oh, I was just talking to my mother," she lied, laughing nervously. She certainly couldn't tell him now. "We're having lunch together this afternoon."

"Then why'd you hang up as soon as I came in the room?" He asked her point blank.

"I wanted to devote all my attention to you." She stood up and put her arms around him, effectively changing the subject for now.

"You'll get no argument from me on that one," Lee whispered, kissing her passionately. "But I thought you were having lunch with me today," He reminded her. He'd been looking forward to it all day.

"Was I?" She asked in confusion. It had completely slipped her mind.

"Yes, he remarked, staring at her in concern. This wasn't like her at all. She was usually the organized one while he had to be reminded about appointments. "It's the only day this week we'll be able to have lunch together, remember?"

"Was that today?" She moaned.

"Don't tell me you forgot."

She looked down at the floor uncomfortably and nodded slowly. "I'm sorry, Sweetheart."

"That's okay," he reassured her. She was probably just overwhelmed with family stuff at home. "I'm sure your mother will understand if you cancel on her."

"I'm not canceling on her, Amanda corrected, frowning and looking up into his face. "I don't get to spend very much time with her as it is."

"What do you mean?" Lee asked in frustration. "You live with her. When am I going to get to see you?" He pleaded. This secret marriage thing just wasn't working. It was more frustrating that he could possibly have imagined.

"We see each other every day," She reminded him, deliberately being obtuse, but knowing exactly how he felt. But she just couldn't cancel on Joe now. She desperately needed someone to talk to and unfortunately he was the only person who could help her.

"Only when we're here, " Lee pointed out sharply. "We haven't spent an evening together in..."

"...six weeks." They finished together morosely.

"So you're keeping track too, huh?" He said playfully as he pulled her closer and kissed her passionately.

She closed her eyes and kissed him back hungrily. He was right. It had been too long. After a few seconds she pulled away. "Lee, someone could walk in."

"I'll lock the door," He promised, eyes dancing in anticipation., as he reached for her again. She knew that look all too well. He wanted her but she just wasn't in the mood after her appointment this morning. She needed some space to think things through.

"No, we have a lot of work to catch up on," she said softly as she pulled away from him.

"Right. Work," He sighed in annoyance, knowing she was right, but not happy about it.

"That is why we're here, Lee, she explained quickly before he became too suspicious. "We have a million reports to write up that have been sitting here not getting done. Not to mention we promised Billy we'd reorganize the vault two months ago and we haven't even started on it yet."

"That's because we've been too busy running around chasing the bad guys, he pointed out honestly. "If you'll recall just a moment ago you said you wanted to devote all your attention to me."

"How about letting me make it up to you tonight?" She compromised. "I'll come over and cook you a nice dinner and we can talk."

"Talking wasn't exactly what I had in mind," he smiled wryly, kissing her again quickly and going to his desk reluctantly.

"Well, I do have something very important to talk to you about," She said slowly.

"What?" He asked curiously, looking up at her.

"Later," She promised, definitely not up to talking to him right now. She just didn't know what she was going to do."Now, back to work."

"Slave driver." He pouted.

A little while later, Joe and Amanda were sitting in s corner booth at Dooley's, They'd finished eating and she was doing her best to make small talk. Joe took her hand in his.

"Okay, Amanda, That's enough of that," he said. He could only here her say it was too hot in the restaurant so many times.

"What?"She asked uncomfortably, smiling a bright and utterly false smile.
*This was a mistake. I shouldn't have come here. I should be talking to Lee about this.* she thought.

"Since we got here, we've talked about the weather, the boys, your job, your mother's new boyfriend and the weather again, but you still haven't told me what you called me about." He reminded her. It must be really be something if she couldn't bring herself to say it aloud. He mentally steeled himself for the worst. The more she'd been chattering the more apprehensive he'd gotten.

She sighed and stared at the table cloth, absently tracing the pattern with her fingertips. She knew he was right. She'd been hoping that somehow the inspiration would strike and she'd be able to just say what was on her mind. Now she wasn't so sure she could tell him at all. It wasn't like when she was carrying Phillip and Jamie. Things were so much different then. Now, she and Joe were both married to other people. How could she tell him this? But she needed advice and soon. "It's difficult to talk about."

"So was telling me you were getting married and that you wanted me to help you keep it a secret from the boys, but you managed to tell me that.," He reminded her softly.

"This is even more serious.," She admitted softly, still unable to look in his eyes.

"Uh-oh.! Do I even want to hear this?" Joe asked teasingly, sitting back. Surely she wasn't talking about being relocated to another country where he wouldn't be able to see his boys anymore?

"Well, I...I...God, this an awful thing to talk to your ex-husband about, but you're the only one I knew I could talk to who knows all of my secrets.," She said uncomfortably.

"Except Lee.," he pointed out.

"Yes, but he can't be objective in this situation."

"Amanda, what exactly is the situation?" Joe demanded, getting a little impatient. He couldn't sit here all day waiting for her to trust him enough to open up to him. He had clients he had to see.

"I might as well just come out and say it. I'm pregnant. To be quite honest, I'm really not sure how to handle the situation."

He pulled his hand away from hers abruptly and stared at her wide-eyed. "You're not thinking of having an abortion?"

She looks startled at that. What on EARTH gave him THAT idea? "No! NO! Nothing like that! I want this baby more than anything. It's a part of Lee, but you know what our circumstances are. What are the boys going to think? How am I going to tell them that I've been lying to them for six months?" Once she started talking all her worries and fears started pouring out. "Lee and Jamie are just starting to form a solid relationship and I have a feeling if we just blurt out the truth that will just be destroyed." She looked down again and back up at Joe. "Jamie has just let his guard down enough to trust Lee and I don't want to jeopardize that. You know how Jamie is. He'll just clam up again."

"I can see your point," Joe admitted, taking her hand again in sympathy. "Don't worry. I'm sure it will work out for the best."

Meanwhile, back at the agency, Francine strolled in to the Q bureau. Lee glanced up from the file he'd been looking at, happy for the distraction. All this paperwork was beginning to make him cross-eyed.

"What's up, Francine?"

"Where's Amanda?" She asked , looking around.

"Out to lunch with her mother,." He answered readily.

"Damn! I wanted her advice on something." Francine stated unhappily.

"You want Amanda's advice? Why do I find that hard to believe?"

"Why is that so hard for you to believe? Amanda and I do occasionally have a civil conversation."

Lee chuckled at the idea of Francine coming to Amanda for advice. "She probably won't be back from lunch for a while. You know how she and Dotty both like to talk. Will I do?" Lee offered. " We have been friends for a long time, after all."

"Sure,." Francine replied in relief, glad to be able to talk to someone, but not really expecting him to understand the way Amanda would.

"Why don't we go to lunch?" He offered, thinking that it might be easier for her to talk where there were less likely to be interruptions "I haven't eaten yet."

"Great."

At the same time, Joe and Amanda were still talking at the restaurant.

"Have you told Lee, yet?" He asked her with concern.

"No. I was planning on telling him tonight. I just don't know how to approach the subject," she admitted. "This isn't something we ever planned on or even talked about."

"Hmmm," Joe said reflectively, thinking for a minute. "My advice would be to just tell him. He loves you and I know the two of you can decide what's best. As for the boys..."
As they were talking, Lee and Francine entered. Francine saw Amanda talking with Joe and nudged Lee.

"I thought you said Amanda was having lunch with her mom,." Francine stated to Lee in surprise.

"She is.," Lee insisted, having no reason not to trust his wife's word.

"No, she's not," Francine corrected, indicating with her head where Joe and Amanda were sitting. "She's right over there with some guy."

Lee glanced over in the direction she indicated and saw Amanda reach over and take Joe's hand. His eyebrows rose in surprise and stunned hurt.

Neither Joe nor Amanda spotted Lee or Francine. "Thanks, Joe," Amanda said gratefully. "It helps talking to you."

"Hey, what are ex-husbands for?" Joe teased. Amanda smiled.

Lee clenched his fists in fury as he watched. How could Amanda do this to him? Why did she lie to him about who she was having lunch with?

"Everyone I work with thinks it's strange that you and I still get along even after our divorce," Joe admitted honestly. She nodded her head in agreement. People she worked with didn't understand it either, especially Lee.

Amanda glanced at her watch. "Speaking of work, I should be getting back. Lee's going to be wondering where I am."

"Actually, I need to get going too. I have another meeting at two." They stood up and walked toward the door.

Lee ducked out of sight as they walked out of the restaurant. He watched as Amanda gave Joe a hug. Joe kissed her quickly to say good-bye and they went their separate ways.

Francine has been watching this scene with some interest and, in fact, hadn't even noticed that Lee was no longer by her side. She'd been so caught up with the scene before her.

"My, my,!" She stated gleefully in surprise. "Looks like Amanda has a new boyfriend."

Lee came out of his hiding place back to her side. "He's not a new boyfriend," Lee grated out. "He's her ex-husband."

Lee was trying very hard not to lose his cool in front of Francine. He and Amanda were supposed to have broken up.

"Well, it looks like they were trying to rekindle the old flame to me.," Francine stated suggestively.

Unfortunately that's what it looked like to him as well. "Look, Francine. I'm not hungry anymore!" He turned and stormed out, not waiting for her answer.

She smiled after him for a few seconds, then suddenly realized that she was stranded at the restaurant with no car. At least Lee's troubles seemed more serious than hers. She smiled a little as she realized that in spite of his objections to the contrary, Lee wanted Amanda back. She walked over to a pay telephone to call a cab to take her back to work. As she was dialing, she realized that she still hadn't talked to anyone about her problem. *Oh well,* she though. *I'll just catch up with Amanda at the office. Then I can get all the dirt on her relationship with her ex.*

Back at the agency an hour later, Francine cornered Amanda as she was coming down the stairs leading to the Q Bureau.

"Amanda, I was just coming up to see you. I really need to talk to you. I tried talking to Lee, but he was...preoccupied."

"Can it wait, Francine?" Amanda pleaded, really not up to dealing with anyone else's problems at present. Her own seemed almost insurmountable. "I really need to talk to Lee." *before I lose my nerve,* she added silently to herself.

"Sure," Francine said agreeably. "He's upstairs in Billy's office."

They got in the elevator together. *So, Amanda's going to tell him the truth about her ex.* Francine wasn't about to miss this scene for the world!

Meanwhile, Lee is in Billy's office pacing. He'd just finished relating the entire scene to Billy. Normally he wasn't the kind of person who spoke of his concerns to anyone aloud. Amanda was the only exception to that rule. After they'd gotten married he started discovering how good it felt to be able to let down his guard and just be himself and still be loved by her. He just couldn't talk to her about this right now. He and Billy had been friends for a long time and he knew what he told Billy would stay in his office. His world was just suddenly shaken to its core and he needed some constructive advice. Unfortunately he was just too furious to listen to it right now.

"Scarecrow, calm down," Billy said placatingly. He knew that Lee had to be imagining things. He knew that they'd been seeing each other for some time, so he could understand Lee's attitude now. He never was objective when it came to her. However, Amanda having a fling was just incomprehensible . "I'm sure you're just overreacting. There had to be a logical explanation."

"Overreacting?!" Lee shouted angrily. "Billy, my wife lied to me! She told me she was meeting her mother. Then what does she do? She sneaks off and meets her ex-husband! Why?" Lee was just too hurt for words. She'd never lied to him…at least not about something like this.

"Lee, did you just say your wife lied to you?"

Lee looked at Billy in horror. Had he said wife? Had he let his temper get so out of control that he'd blown the secret they'd been trying to keep for months? "Wife? No. Where'd you get that from, Billy. I said my partner lied to me."

"Wife, partner. Yeah, those words sound so much alike." Billy laughed. "I know what I heard, Lee. You said wife."

"Yeah, ok. So, I said wife. it's high time you knew the truth anyway," Lee started, but Billy put his hand up to stop him.

"It's ok, Lee. I've known since the day you got married."

"I just don't get it, Billy. Is the honeymoon over already? Why is she lying to me?" Billy looked out the window and saw Amanda and Francine in the bullpen walking toward his office.

"Well, here she comes. Why don't you ask her?" He sighed in relief.

"I will." He yanked open the door and stalked toward Amanda. Billy followed him, not wanting to see things get out of hand.

"Lee, just stay calm."

"It's too late for that," Lee snapped. He turned to face Amanda. "So, where've you been all this time?"

Amanda looked taken aback by this interrogation. "I - I told you I was having lunch with my mother.," she stammered, never seeing him this furious before, at least not directed towards her.

"Oh, did your mother have a sex change operation then? I was at Dooley's and saw you and Joe together! "

At this point, all the agents in the bullpen had stopped what they were doing to watch this spectacle unfolding before them.

*Uh-oh!* She thought to herself desperately. She glanced at the floor, mortified that they were having this conversation in public. "Oh. Look, Lee we need to talk."

"Is that what you were going to tell me tonight?" He demanded furiously, voicing his worst fear aloud. "That you're going back to him?"

She glanced up at him then. "No! That's crazy!"

"Crazy, huh? That's why you hung up the phone so fast when I walked in this morning?!. You were talking to Joe. Maybe that's why you pull away from me every time I touch you. Whenever I want to see you lately, you always have an excuse."

The bullpen was so silent that you could hear a pin drop. No one moved. Everyone's attention was drawn to the show in front of them.

Amanda glanced around uncomfortably. "Lee, this isn't the time or place for this. People are watching."

"Well, I don't give a damn what any of these people think anymore!" He turned to the room and shouted, "Do you hear me? I don't give a damn what anyone thinks!" At this several people tried to feign interest in their work. Amanda paled. He turned back to face Amanda. "I'm through putting on this charade and trying to pretend I don't love you. What I wonder, though, is if you still love me."

"Of course, I do," she whispered heart brokenly. How could he think anything else? She reached out to him. He jerked away from her.

"Then why did you lie to me?" He asked in a hurt voice "Why were you meeting in secret with your ex-husband?" He hesitated, not wanting to ask the real question that'd been plaguing him since he left Dooley's. "Are you still in love with him?"

"No! Of course not. He's married to someone else for one thing," she tried to explain reasonably.

"So are you, but that didn't stop you from meeting him today," Lee countered icily.

At this, there's a faint murmuring from the crowd, buzzing about the "married" part, everyone wondering if it was really true.

Amanda winced at the mutterings going on all around her. She scanned the room self-consciously. "Lee, let's go somewhere so we can talk in private," She whispered softly. Her stomach was in knots and her head was spinning. This was the last thing she'd expected. She just wanted to talk to him about their future, their baby. She didn't want to fight with him about Joe. She knew she shouldn't have lied to him, but she only did it because she wasn't sure how he'd take the news.

"No, I'm through talking, Amanda.! I just want to be left alone." He stormed out of the bullpen, heedless of anything and everything that was in his way.

Several agents who were in his direct path hastily moved out of his way as they didn't want to incur his wrath.