Lizzy leaned her head against the window and wondered when she had become such a scrooge about Christmas. It used to be her favorite holiday, just like every other holiday in the world. She could still remember the Christmases spent at her Granny Bennet's house, singing carols and waiting for the song that they always sang right before opening up the presents. Why her granny picked Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer as the opening presents song, she'd never know.
Lizzy sighed, deep in reflection. The Christmas she was giving the hula hoop always was a favorite memory. It wasn't so funny when she was 5 and was given a hula hoop, but now, with age, she could look back and laugh. Her Granny had taken gift wrapping paper and cut it into thin strips and then wrapped the strips around the hoop, following the curve, so when Lizzy went to play with it, she didn't even have to unwrap it. Lizzy smiled a small smile as she remembered frantically trying to find her present under the tree that year; surely the hula hoop wasn't hers. The disappointment of the hula hoop diminished over time as she remembered spending time with cousin seen too little through the year and getting to play in the guest parlor of the house.
Thanksgivings were held at her Great Aunt Linda's. Lizzy and her sisters never really liked going there. Great Aunt Linda's children were her parents' ages and had no children, so no toys were available to play with. Another reason to not like her Great Aunt Linda's was the fact that she liked to make ceramics. Ceramics were all over the house (as well as painting, as she was quite artistic). Thanksgiving was always spent being told not to touch or to get away from that or just plain NO! Lizzy liked Thanksgiving much better after her Great Aunt Linda had passed away and they just had Thanksgiving at home, even if she still had to wear a dress and use proper "company" manners. Using her mother's china was kind of special, but her family always seemed to break at least one piece every year while putting it up and because it was a pattern that wasn't made any more, eventually that tradition was fazed out for practical reasons.
New Years were always a little more loose growing up. With five children, her parents didn't tend to go to parties, but didn't throw them either. By the time she was 16, New Years was an excuse to go party with her friends. Not that Lizzy was a big partier, drinking wasn't her favorite thing to do. New Years tended to be at home events, surrounded by family (sometimes even willingly) and on occasion, by friends. Her most memorable New Years was 1999-2000. Her friend, Jason, had decided that the world was going to end at the stroke of midnight. Lizzy scoffed, charlotte argued, and they sat around the TV watching New Years around the world. Jason was disappointed by the lack of excitement for the New Years for a while. Charlotte decided that he needed have the traditional New Years Kiss and they dated off and on for several years after that.
As Lizzy grew up, the holidays became less magical and more stressful. The first holiday season away from home was a little heart wrenching, but what college student has enough money to fly home, when college is more than 1000 miles away? College was chosen for several reasons (Jane, for one, was a student there and her mother's influence was less when not as close) and was purposefully far away. Lizzy thought she had accepted the loneliness of Christmas not near her family, but she hadn't. Lizzy brushed away a stray tear as she thought about that first Christmas away from home. Her mother, angry that Lizzy chose to go to college far away (forgetting that Jane went there too) and even more disappointed that she was unable to find and keep a boyfriend decided that Lizzy would not get any presents that year. She had lied to her husband and other daughters, assuring them that Lizzy had been sent a package full of gaily wrapped packages and candy and other treats that make Christmas so special. Her roommate (also unable to go home for financial reasons) could not understand why her mother wouldn't send her anything for Christmas, just because she was at college. Chrissie had snuck out and spent precious money being saved to buy the latest book from her favorite author and bought Lizzy a present. She bought Lizzy a beautiful blue sketch book. Lizzy was a closet artist, drawing just for her, but always afraid to show her work to others. The book was special and had helped Lizzy through many emotional phases in her life. Her mother eventually forgave her (somewhat) for going to college so far away and was repentant (somewhat) for not sending her anything for Christmas. Thomas Bennet being incensed at his wife for not sending her anything and then lying about it probably sped up the half hearted apology. That Christmas was the start of her "grinch phase" as her friends called it.
Lizzy really didn't understand why they would call her the Grinch. She couldn't understand the practicality of decorating for one day. She especially didn't get into the commercial aspect of Christmas. Of course she bought presents, but they were heartfelt gifts, nothing too expensive and not the latest "hot" or "it" item her sisters (Lydia, it seemed always wanted more and more expensive designer things the older she got) for her family. She wondered why it felt different as she grew older. Was she just looking through the lenses of an adult? Her dad always told her Christmas was best as a child or a parent perhaps that was it. She no longer saw the magic of behaving so Santa will leave the doll she wanted, but as an adult. Helping her mother wrap presents didn't help (particularly wrapping her own presents, which her mom swore wasn't hers).
Her mother was still upset about Thanksgiving this year. Lizzy had insisted Thanksgiving be the one holiday they (William Darcy, her husband and herself) spent absolutely by themselves. Lizzy enjoyed the whole process of cooking and baking (not to mention the minimal 3 freak outs of "oh no, I forgot [insert random, not important item and now dinner is ruined!") for him and the few friends they would invite over. The one thing about Thanksgiving, it gave her an anchor. When she spent Christmas with her family, about ready to go over the edge about something ridiculous all she had to do was think of how cozy and comforting it was to eat too much while talking to friends about nothing important. She was glad she didn't cave this year. This year her parents had Thanksgiving by themselves. All of the girls were either married or couldn't afford to fly in for just three days from college and Lizzy, even though she was driving distance from her parents refused to come. Thanksgiving had always seemed like an intimate family holiday, one that was spent with immediate family members, not the Thanksgivings spent at Great Aunt Linda's being told not to touch things.
Sighing, Lizzy looked to her left. Her husband of 3 years, Fitzwilliam (or William) Darcy was driving, humming off key to the Christmas music playing on the radio. He was focused on the road and not at all looking forward to spending time with his mother in law. Lizzy knew her mother drove him crazy trying to convince him that his job was to marry her and impregnate her immediately. Fanny Bennet lectured Lizzy for two hours when she found out that Lizzy planned on working for a while until starting a family. Most of the lecture revolved on why would William stay with her if he didn't have an heir to his family's fortune? Fortuitously, Lizzy was adept at ignoring her silly mother.
Looking to her left again, she smiled, placed her hand on William's leg and said, "Thank you". William looked startled for a moment, but smiling at her, took her small hand in his and continued driving to the Bennets for Christmas.
A/N: I based some of the memories on my own holiday experiences (names have been changed, but I did get a hula hoop one year for Christmas, exactly as I have Lizzy getting hers and My Great Aunt wasn't named Linda but did exsist w/ ceramics). Any Who, I don't own P&P, I just drool over Darcy.