Title- Dreaming is Bliss
Summary- A dream that takes place during the summer of '02. Lorelai's POV.
Pairings- Luke and Lorelai
Disclaimer- I own nothing.
Authors Note- I have changed this into a one-shot. Sorry.
"Hey," Luke said stiffly, standing behind the counter in his usual position as I sulked into the seat in front of him, barely noticing the emptiness of the place and the darkness that had fallen over the sky.
"Hi," I mumbled, throwing my head onto crossed arms set the counter. I was obviously tired, and I had yet to be rejuvenated by a cup of Luke's wondrous coffee that day.
"You okay?" He asked, finally showing concern for me. If I had known that all it took to get some emotion out of him was for me to collapse on the counter, I would have done it weeks ago.
Weeks ago. That was that very unfaithful day Jess had crashed Rory's car and horrible words were exchanged between me and my ex-best friend. He still wasn't over it, though I had apologized profusely. He was still giving me the cold shoulder- I hated it.
"Tired," I managed to get out. I somehow untangled my arms and slightly lifted my head to allow my finger to point at the coffee maker. "Please," I whined, pouting slightly though I was sure he couldn't see it.
Without any protestation, he set a mug in front of me, filled all the way to the top with a heavenly good smelling liquid.
"Thank you," I moaned graciously, gulping down the cup in less than two minutes.
"It's what I do," He told me in a monotonous tone, making me glare subtly at him.
"It's what you used to do," I corrected bitterly, leaning over my empty mug being clutched tightly by my two hands. "Now it's all you seem to want to do."
I didn't have to look up to see him shake his head in protest. It was something I'd grown accustomed to whenever this subject was brought up.
"I mean, I accidentally let those three words slip- but I apologized, a lot. I want you in my life, Luke. I miss talking with you and having you around my house to fix things. It was a mistake, I was worried about my kid and I was used to you always being on my side- being there for me and Rory. It scared me how you weren't helping me calm down because you had someone else to take care of. I was confused and a mess." I pleaded desperately. "Just, what else do I have to do to have you back as a friend?" I questioned, trying to keep my voice even.
"Lorelai," He sighed, still shaking his head. "Don't," His voice was full of agitation and annoyance. I hated it how he could be so stubborn.
"I told you I was sorry, that I didn't mean it, I just really want my best friend back," I hated showing vulnerability, but here I was, begging my ex-best friend to accept my apology and let me back in his life.
"I can't," He stated, throwing his hands up in defense. He grabbed the rag off his shoulder and moved from around the counter to the tables, wiping them down in frustration, his back to me the entire time.
"What? You can't forgive me? I say one hurtful thing and then you'll never be my friend again? Never talk to me or help me out? Just like that?" I asked bitterly, throwing my hands around to make frustrated gestures.
"I can't be just friends with you," He told me in exasperation as he spun around to face me with a firm look on his face. "I'm sick of only being there as a person to pick up the pieces and help you on occasion, I don't want to be the go-to guy that'll only be able to pour your coffee and help you around your house. I want more than that," His tone was distressed and his hands were clenched into fists by his side.
I was stunned to the spot as he ranted on desperately, with a look of adoration and love mixed in with his array of emotions. "Luke," I managed to sputter, smiling a soft, timid smile. I was overwhelmed to say anything else. That and the fact that I had no clue what to say kept me silent as he stared at me from across the room.
"No, I know you just want to be friends, I get it, but I can't go back to just being friends. I can't stand to watch you and your boyfriends walking around town, it hurts that you'll only ever see me as a friend and nothing more." He stated pleadingly, staring me directly in the eye.
"I-I don't, um, know what to say," I whispered weakly, letting his words sink in and my thoughts to increase at a rapid speed, trying to figure out what to do.
I noticed his saddened look as he set his head down on his chest in disappointment. He slowly walked over to a stool three away from me and sat down with his arms crossed over his chest. "You should go; coffees on the house." He suggested, back to his monotonous voice.
I ignored him completely and turned to face him. He was staring strait ahead out the window and into the town square. He seemed lost in thought, I noticed, as I slowly slid over to the stool next to him, mirroring his actions. "I didn't realize it," I admitted quietly, trying to maintain a calm demeanor.
"I thought it was obvious," He stated dully, leaning back against the counter and slowly swaying his feet back and forth.
"I just thought you were being you. I didn't know that you were giving me a sort of special treatment," I teased, trying to lighten the conversation, though it seemed to have no effect on him.
"It began as just me helping you out so you didn't become to stressed out, you know?" He asked, shrugging as if it were nothing. "Then I wanted to help you out because you seemed to need someone- you know, a partner to help pick up the slack and as I helped you out more and more, I began to admire your strengths, support you during your weaknesses and then I just began to want more than that. So I tried to drop subtle hints to show you that I'd always be there. I'd drop whatever I was doing to help you, go along with your bits, and even send away my nephew because you didn't like him, though he was my family." He explained, still not looking at me once. Throughout his explanation, though, I noticed how he kept a distant look and I immediately felt bad for not noticing anything sooner.
"I was just so used to you doing everything and anything for me; I barely noticed that there could have been something more behind your actions. And as much as I feel relieved that you sent Jess back home, I'm sorry you felt you had to. I was still adjusting to the fact that me and Rory weren't no longer your family, that you had someone else to look after." I clarified, letting my hands drop to my sides. I turned to look at him, hoping to see a reassuring smile, but he still kept his gaze focused on the town square.
"Just because Jess came didn't mean you two stopped being my family," He told me softly, mimicking my motions and letting his hands drop to his sides. "I was still there for you when you needed me." He told me gently.
I subtly slipped my hand into his, lacing our fingers together. "But when Rory was in the hospital, you weren't there. I had to do it alone because you had Jess to take care of," I reminded him, trying not to sound selfish.
"I just needed to make sure he was okay, too. I didn't know if he was hurt or what had happened." He said, squeezing my hand in acknowledgment. He finally turned to look at me, a solemn look upon his face as he traced my features with his dark blue eyes. "He told me it was an accident. That he would ever intentionally hurt Rory. Then I let him know that I was obligated to you and Rory and he had to go back home."
"Thank you," I smiled softly, hoping he would understand the double meaning behind my words. His eyes glistened and I knew. He understood. And I wanted to be more than just friends.
I slowly leaned in towards him, noting how his grip on my hand tightened. I gently brushed my lips over his, letting him know I wanted this. He softly brought his free hand up to my face, cupping my cheek while tenderly stroking it as he brought our lips together, slowly deepening it with his tongue. I willingly obliged, moaning quietly at the sensation. I gradually slipped my free arm around his neck to pull him closer, but due to the lack of oxygen, we mutually parted lips, leaning our foreheads against each others.
"You really want to do this?" He checked, still breathing heavily.
"With lips like that, there's no way you can get rid of me," I retorted, smiling in reassurance. "I'm not going anywhere," I told him, letting the confidence shine in my tone before slowly capturing his lips in yet another mind-blowing kiss.
And then I woke up.