A Mother's Job

by lovelyinksmudge

disclaimer: I do not own Sailor Moon in any way, shape, or form.

When her daughter trudged in late after four o'clock, watery eyes glued to the floor and her small shoulders slumped, Ikuko knew it was time to break out the cookie dough. Wondering what had upset Usagi this time, the blue-haired mother quickly got to work pulling out all the necessary ingredients and tools.

Usagi sulkily shuffled into the kitchen and placed her bookbag softly on the table, almost collapsing into the nearest chair. Ikuko finished tying her favorite apron around her waist and placed a comforting hand on Usagi's back. "Usa-chan," she cooed gently, "What's the matter, darling?"

The sixteen year old young woman let her head fall heavily onto the table in sheer depression. "Mama, do you think Mamo-chan really loves me?"

Ikuko blinked. Out of all the things to come out of Usagi's mouth, a reluctant question of Mamoru's love for her was the last thing she had ever expected to hear. Although Usagi frequently complained about her "Mamo-chan" spending too much time with Chibi-Usa or with his nose in a book, never had she questioned the depth of his feelings. In truth, Ikuko had oftentimes found herself surprised that her daughter remained so confident in her relationship with an older, sophisticated man. As time went on, however, and Ikuko had obtained many opportunities to observe the unlikely couple, the lingering anxiety and worry for her daughter's heart dwindled to nothing after seeing the way Mamoru simply looked at Usagi.

"Of course he loves you," Ikuko finally managed to say, smoothing back Usagi's gorgeous pigtails. "What makes you ask that?"

Silently, Usagi retrieved a crumpled up ball of paper from her skirt pocket and shamefully handed it to her mother. Ikuko unfolded it, already knowing where this was going, and frowned in dread. The paper turned out to be a geometry quiz Usagi had taken last week, marked at the top with a large, red "45." Underneath that number, in small, loopy letters, Usagi's teacher had written "suggests after school help."

"Oh, Usagi-chan," Ikuko muttered disappointedly, shaking her head in that all-too-familiar way that all mothers adopt when chastising their child. "A forty-five? I thought you said you studied for this!"

Usagi flushed a dull red, dropping her meek gaze from the table to the floor. In all honesty, the studying excuse had only been used to cover Usagi's absence from dinner (ugly, nasty youma, in the park, ten feet tall, oozing red eyes, sharp claws, stealing energy, horrible wordplay concerning swords). "Well, uh..." She responded smartly, blue orbs focused on her twiddling thumbs. "We may have, um, gotten a bit distracted…"

"By what?" Ikuko asked sharply.

Usagi's mind worked in overtime and she blurted out the first thing she could think of. "Rei has a lot of manga stashed in her room." Feeling quite idiotic, she slid even further down her seat as her mother shook her head and pinched the bridge of her nose tiredly.

Ikuko sighed. "Oh, Usagi, I don't know what to do with you… Do most of your study groups with the girls end up with you totally distracted?"

"NO!" Usagi hurriedly denied, waving her hands vehemently back and forth. This was not the direction she had wanted the conversation to go in, not at all! "No, Rei had… had just gotten some new books this time, so we started looking over them and lost track of time! I'm – I'm sorry, Mama…"

Casting a critical eye over Usagi's guilt-ridden, distraught face, Ikuko gracefully let the matter drop, mentally reminding herself to hash out this studying issue again later (honestly, if she had been allowing her daughter to go to study meetings for the past two years, there better have been some actual studying going on!). Shuffling across the kitchen, Ikuko began to measure out some flour to start the batter; as she did so, she gently began again, "So what does your awful grade have to do with Mamoru-kun's love for you?"

Usagi began smoothing out the horrible crinkles in her quiz paper, eyes stuck to the table and teeth worrying her dry bottom lip. "I ran into him on my way home…"

"Did you show him your grade?"

"Mmhm," Usagi replied mournfully, as if that had been the worst mistake of her entire life. "Well, no, not really, actually. I wasn't paying attention when I was walking and he snatched it out of my hands from behind. That sneak."

Ikuko stifled a small giggle at her daughter's commentary, knowing that if Usagi caught her laughter, she would instantly become annoyed and distracted from her story.

"He told me…" Here, Usagi hesitated, eyes beginning to mist over slightly, "He told me that he was very disappointed in me and that I need to work harder. I know my bad grade was my own fault, but when he said that, it just made me feel ten times worse. Then he told me that we wouldn't be going on any more dates until I start improving in school. He said that I may be focusing too much on our relationship in addition to everything else in my life and that I may not be mature enough to balance schoolwork and dating. And if that's not the reason for my horrible grades, at least I'll have some motivation to work hard."

Her daughter looked utterly miserable as she finished. Ikuko tapped an egg against the counter carefully, the noise of the soft shell cracking filling the kitchen. "Hasn't he done this before, though? Suspended your dates so that you could concentrate more on school?"

"Yes," Usagi mumbled. "But the fact that this is like the fourth time he's done it… Mama, he uses our relationship like a toy, like a thing! It feels like our dates don't mean anything to him because they're always the first thing he takes away from me. I practically live from one date to the next, they're that special to me. But it seems like he wouldn't mind if we never dated at all."

"You and I both know that that isn't true, Usa-chan," Ikuko said gently, sympathetically. She brought all the ingredients together into one big bowl and began stirring, skillfully smoothing the choppy mess into a smooth batter suitable for the best comfort food on earth.

"I know in my head it isn't true, but I don't feel like it isn't true, Mama. My heart needs a little more convincing," the blonde muttered quietly. She sighed and fought back the urge to cry – getting bad grades was enough, Mamoru would certainly not want to date a crybaby on top of that.

A good ten minutes passed in silence. Ikuko finally placed a tray of cookies in the oven and quickly washed her hands, sliding into the seat across from Usagi while drying her wet fingers. Her daughter sat with her upper half lying flat out on the table in a defeated posture, head down and nestled defensively in the crook of her elbow. She laid a gentle hand on Usagi's head.

"Come now, Usa-chan, sit up straight and look me in the eyes," Ikuko murmured, nudging gently. Usagi groaned, but slowly did as told, looking red-eyed and pouty, as she always did when on the verge of crying.

Ikuko used her no-nonsense voice. "That boy is head over heels for you. Anyone with a pulse can see that. Even your father sees how much Mamoru-kun loves you – why else do you think he's so desperate to chase him off? He knows that Mamoru-kun is the man who will eventually steal you away from him."

This made Usagi look even more miserable. "So then why, Mama? Why does he –"

"Hush, darling, let me finish," her mother urged. "The strength of his feelings is not something you should question. What I think you and Mamoru-kun really need to do is slow down and talk. Usagi-chan, you two started this relationship when you were very young. I know it didn't feel like it at the time, but you were still a child in many ways when you met Mamoru-kun. Now that you're older and the relationship isn't so new, you can see that some things need to change if you want this to last."

Swiping at the small tears running down Usagi's cheeks, Ikuko wrapped her hands around her beautiful daughter's face. It hurt sometimes – to look at Usagi and see just how fast she was growing up. But it was a good type of pain, and one she was always proud to bear. "It seems to me that you and Mamoru established early on that he was the more experienced and mature partner in the relationship. He looked after you, took care of you, directed the path your relationship would take.

"But you need to understand that he's not a perfect human being, and he can make mistakes like anybody else. Right now, he's stuck treating you like you're still fourteen years old. Well, it's time you sat him down and let him know that you're ready to be an equal part of this relationship. Let him know how you feel and what you think, because a true partnership, Usagi, in love and in everything else – one person does not make all the decisions. Now is the moment to fight for your right to help make those decisions."

"Fight… against Mamo-chan?" Usagi murmured, uneasy. She had never seriously fought with Mamoru about anything… sure, bickering about what time she had to go home, which restaurant to go to, how many ice cream cones he owed her – those were all small things! Those were easy fights to wager. But actually arguing against him about something so important? It seemed like an insurmountable challenge.

Except… that wasn't really true, was it? Memories flashed by: an untransformed Usagi refusing to run from danger, even after Tuxedo Kamen told her to… Usagi using the Maboroshi no Ginzuishou to save her friends on the asteroid, though Mamoru desperately asked her not to… When it was important, her strength as Sailor Moon seemed to triumph over everything. She had known what was right, and it didn't matter if Mamoru disagreed with her in those moments – she'd had the courage to do what needed to be done anyway.

And in every single one of those instances, Mamoru came to support her. He had never once rejected her or refused to help her merely because she hadn't listened to him. Because he loved her, and ultimately, he trusted her, too.

Maybe it was time to take some of that Sailor Moon strength and apply it elsewhere in her life. Okay, so her relationship wasn't exactly a life or death situation, but it was extremely important to her. Her Ikuko-mama was right: just this once, Usagi needed to fight for her love, against her love.

She took a deep breath. "You're right, Mama. He loves me and I love him, but that's not all there is to a relationship. He has to stop treating me like a kid! First though, I need to let him know that I'm unhappy with how things are." Usagi sat up straighter and rubbed furiously at her sore eyes. The look on her face was no longer lost and uncertain; it was the disposition of a girl on a mission. "I want to talk to him right away about all of this. Mama, do you think I could –"

"Yes, you're excused from dinner," Ikuko smiled at Usagi, feeling that mix of pain and pride in her heart as she watched the young woman in front of her collect herself and find the determination to move forward. "Why don't you take these cookies to go, dear? That way, once you two get things sorted out like I know you will, you'll both have a reward waiting."

Usagi looked at her mother in wonder as Ikuko bustled about the kitchen. When the chocolate chip cookies were neatly wrapped in her favorite pink and white bunny handkerchief and placed on the table, Usagi stood up and caught Ikuko in a big hug. "Thank you for saying all of that, Mama, I needed to hear it. You're the absolute best."

"Oh, anytime, Usa-chan." Ikuko returned the hug tightly and smiled into Usagi's golden hair. "Just remember your kind feelings towards me when I inevitably bring up your failed Geometry quiz again."

Usagi buried her face into her mother's apron. "Ugh, Mama."

Small rant: This was always something in the anime that bothered me. In my opinion, Mamoru in the manga loved Usagi in a much more obvious way. The way he held her, the way he spoke to her, and the way he looked at her oftentimes showed just how precious he thought she was. In the anime, Mamoru was much more aloof and distanced. A lot of times, he treated Usagi like a child - like they grew up together and he always saw her as a younger sister almost, and he was just indulging her crush on him.

In the first episode of the Heartsnatchers-arc, when Usagi finds out she can no longer transform, there's a funny little scene where Usa is pouting over an awful test score; when Mamoru sees it, he gives her a disappointed look and then decides that they shouldn't date for a while so she can focus on her studies. What always bothered me about it was how he made the decision so easily, without even talking to her about it, and how Usagi seemed to be the only one upset about their canceled dates.

Obviously, I read a lot more into that scene than I should have (it was supposed to be funny, for one, not angsty or dramatic), haha! But it got me thinking on how I would feel if my boyfriend talked and acted like towards me all the time... and who I would turn to if it got to be too much. The answer was obvious: my mother, who I am so lucky to have!

There WILL be a second chapter that focuses specifically on Usagi and Mamoru actually having that talk. So please keep an eye out!

Thanks for stopping by! Please drop me a line and tell me if you enjoyed the story!

a quirky little tune