Author note: A written for GTA on 6 degrees of AOL. Takes place during the episode of Click, after Mick has been run over by a car and Beth spends the night at Mick's place.
Disclaimer: You recognize it, then chances are slim to none that I own it. I'm just borrowing them…
Rated PG-13
Please read and review
He lay staring at the frosted lid of his freezer. His mind spinning. Going through a myriad of what ifs. All of them a result of Beth's few innocent little words that had dumped him in a sea of questions. None of which his trusty freezer lid had managed to answer as of yet. Not that he really expected it to. A freezer lid was after all only a freezer lid. Not capable of answering such complex questions.
After all, how was an inanimate object such as a frosted freezer lid supposed to be able to answer questions he had been struggling to answer for himself the past few weeks, if not months. When she had said the words. Those innocent sounding words but put together they held a world of subtext. "From dating to speed-dating." As usual he had bolted as fast as he could. Taken refuge in his freezer and closed the lid.
He never really knew what to reply when she touched upon the subject of them getting intimate. He wanted it. God knew he wanted it badly. There were moments when he thought he would jump her and just take her, but he always managed to calm down and pull back. Always managed to think with his big head.
One of his worst fears was that he would loose control and hurt her if they got intimate. Loosing control sort of came with the territory when making love. Especially if it was as special and passionate as he thought it would be.
His absolute worst fear. It wasn't so much that she would get hurt as how hurt he could get. He loved her in a way he had never loved anyone before which left him wide open to her. Every day he waited for that moment. That one fact about him and his past, about whom and what he was, that would be too much for her. The one fact that would send her running for the hills just as she should.
He was certain it would happen one day. One of these days something she learned about him or about vampires would be too much for her. One of these days he would loose her and that, that would kill him. He knew it. When she left him, he would be dead. As sure as if she'd cut his head off.
Maybe, just maybe, if he tried to keep them from being intimate he would at least have some shred of honour left. At least he wouldn't have to live with the memory of hurting her as he bit her during the act.
No, he would wait. He would continue to stall and maybe. Maybe one day he could find himself putting his own issues aside for her and trust himself for her.