The 'Character Protection Team'

Author: Otaku Neko Ninja Miko Tenshi

Posted: 1st of August, 2014

Edit: Minor alterations contributed on the 5th

Full-story disclaimer: Everything belongs to its respective owner(s); I don't own any existing creations that appear within this fanfiction.

*FIRST PERSON*

Present tense.

"Let me explain you a thing."

I'm sat on a comfortable leather armchair in what appears to be a study, legs crossed with my right hand infront of me, pointer and middle finger pinched to my thumb as my other digits stick up in a refined manner. Irritation rolls off me in waves as I lean forward, staring frustratedly over the top of my glasses.

"We have gathered here today to address a very prominent and thoroughly exasperating issue regarding canon characters: as you may be aware, 'bashing' is a popular activity among fandoms in which fans of the franchise slate characters that they do not like. Through attacking them, they achieve a form of angry satisfaction through being able to find others who agree with them.

This is unacceptable."

I exhale loudly through my nose, falling back against the chair. My eyes close as I reach up to delicately touch the side of my head, hand standing erect to solidate the annoyed pose.

"You are all probably wondering what brought this irksome attitude to my usually neutral self. Truth be told, I was purposely browsing for Mary Sues in the Shugo Chara! series via a Google search when I came across this monstrosity."

I flip up a sheet of paper with a printed screencap of a Yahoo! Answers search. Without the gaps, the address is as follows:

h-t-t-p-s-:-/-/-u-k-.-a-n-s-w-e-r-s-.-y-a-h-o-o-.-c-o-m-/-q-u-e-s-t-i-o-n-/-i-n-d-e-x-?-q-i-d-=-2-0-1-0-0-7-2-6-0-8-0-7-2-7-A-A-b-N-s-2-b

"Needless say that once I scanned through the spectacle, I was consumed with rage. Now, don't get me wrong: everyone is entitled to their own opinion; I will never deny any living being of their own view, but when they phrase it as a fact and a statement… That's where I come in."

I smirk, anime cat-fang peeking over my bottom lip as I subdue the oncoming sourness in favour of taking joy from being able to shoot down the page's comments.

"I, Otaku, will hereby form an intangible establishment wherein common-sense users and logically-thinking individuals may gather to defend the honour of various characters from an array of shows (animes), books (mangas) and games. Our motto?"

Jumping to my feet, I slap the nearby wall, a plaque forming beside my hand.

"With regards to the respectable Yahoo user wchmara, the only user to reason with the bashers in that atrocious article (though patricia :) did deny the enquirers claim), I have adapted their statement to create the rule-of-thumb for this team to use:"

The fundamental difference between a main character and a Mary Sue or Gary Stu lies in how Sues and Stus can only exist in fan-written work. In professional work, the main character must have outstanding qualities to BE the main character; therefore, canons are excused for whatever Sueish/Stuish qualities they bear.

Planting my hands on my hips, I stand proud and tall.

"Now, writers and readers alike!" I call, spreading my arms "Let us join forces – let us purge the world of insecurities regarding characters, and may we protect the canon 'till the end!"

My words cause a stir in the study – a gale whips past me, sending my long hair flying forward. The room begins to glow bright white, shapes altering, twisting and shifting. Grinning, I drop my left arm to my side, right hand reaching out in invitation. The camera floats south, backpedaling out of the room at a steady pace. It exits the room, still facing me as I call, eyes sparkling and voice tinged with laughter:

"Until then, I bid you adieu!"

And the so the doors closed.

Author's note: I am back! :D *party poppers* At long last, I have returned from my hiatus, now equipped with a shiny new netbook *pats mini-laptop*

So, I hope you enjoyed that little prelude! As goes my writing style, I figured that a little background would be lovely, but all chapters after this will focus on protecting the actual characters, with the methods and ways differing per person, all told through story format so as to avoid breaking FanFiction's regulations. Yay for sticking to the rules!

I'm thinking of actually forming a forum dedicated to these discussions, so be sure to let me know your thoughts~! Hell, flame if you must – the hate only makes me stronger! If you want to join the Character Protection Team, just leave me a message tagged with #Supporter.

Love cha,
-ONNMT

(Word count: 885)

Next time on the CPT:

What kind of trigger would that Yahoo article be if this story didn't feature the one who started it all? That's right – next chapter, we will be covering the kuudere herself, Hinamori Amu!