This is my very first story on FanFiction, and I intend to make it very funny. Also, while I like constructive criticism, I don't like trolls, and I know how to report other users. Anyways, let's start the show!

Captain Toad: What show?

Chapter 1: The Start of a New Adventure!

Club 64, in Toad Town

"I would like a Citron Surprise, please. And Toadette would like a Neapolitan Shake." I patiently remarked. Toad Town was as busy as ever, and yet peaceful, in a way. I was thirsting for adventure ever since Super Mario Galaxy 2, but you know what? I want a shot at being the main character for once! The bartender's words interrupted my thoughts.

"One Citron Surprise and one Neapolitan Shake coming up. But I must warn you, the Citron Surprise is remarkably sour."

"I think I could handle it. After all, I traveled through many different galaxies in two games!"

"And you spent most of the time crying like a little baby and letting Mario do the dirty work." Toadette "lied". Do NOT notice the quotations, it will make it more obvious.

"How would you know? You didn't even make an appearance in Super Mario Galaxy 2! And the only appearance you made in the original Super Mario Galaxy was a brief cameo in the intro! I was MUCH more vital to those games!"

"Yes, THOSE games, but I had multiple appearances in spin off games, all of them as a playable and/or major character! That's at least 18 more games that you have ever been in!"

"Your orders are ready, sir, madam." the bartender interrupted, ending our argument. "And it seems one of our trainees would like to see you."

"Hi there! Bet ya didn't expect me, huh?" I could NOT believe who the trainee was, but it became more sensible once I thought about how a lot of characters from other series have been popping up in random places in the Mushroom Kingdom lately.

"Why're you staring into space?" our fellow pint-sized, pointy-eared, idiotic person I don't care about pondered. In case if you still didn't figure it out yet, this is Toon Link we're talking about. YES Toon Link, the chibi-ish doppelganger that I'm not jealous of at ALL. Ok, maybe I'm a little jealous. (Why is he so much more popular than me?)

It's because my games were out longer than yours, and I'm cuter, funnier, nicer, AND more heroic.

GET OFF THE COMPUTER, CAT-EYES!

"It's rude to ignore someone who wants to talk to you, 'Captain'." Toadette remarked as I was typing on my laptop. Excuse me for wanting to type down every detail of every single second like a creepy Shy Guy in the bushes.

"But he just…" I started, only earning a couple of glares, "Ugh, OK, fine, what was it that you wanted to tell me?" I mumbled with an irritated expression on my face. THAT'S RIGHT, MAH FACE!

"As I was trying to say," Lier. "there's supposed to be some guy who would like someone to collect Power Stars and Super Gems for him."

"Why can't he do it himself?"

"Apparently he has Ornithophobia."

"WHAT DOES THE FEAR OF BIRDS HAVE TO DO WITH ANY OF THIS?!"

"He never told me! But he did recommend bringing a large group to help you."

"OK…"I then took a sip of my drink. "WHEEEEE AAAAAAAAAAAA! WHY IS IT SO SOUR?!" I squealed with a puckered face.

Wait, Poker Face? I didn't know you liked Lady Gaga.

'I TOLD YOU TO GET OFF THE COMPUTER!' I somehow successfully typed as we played tug-o-war with my 1,000 COIN COMPUTER!

'You didn't tell me, you just typed it.' I typed after winning the game of tug-o-war and editing the part where Captain Toad insulted me so it would be more appropriate for little kids to read.

"Ha ha! I got my laptop back!" I shouted victoriously. Take that, Toon Link!

"I bet you forgot what he said already, so I'll say it again. There's a guy with a fear of birds who wants you to collect Power Stars and Super Gems and he recommends bringing a group." Toadette said for some weird reason. In response, I questioned her totally random response. I would tell you readers what I actually said, but Toon is kinda right about the whole 'cutting-back-on-the-bad-language-just-for-the-kids' thing.

"What an idiot. A rude, incompetent idiot." Toadette, why you gotta be so rude? It's not like I asked you if you wanna build a snowman.

"Anyways, we should go now. Shokuhin itadaki arigatōgozaimasu!" FYI, I don't speak Japanese, so I can't translate that for you. Where's Toadette going?

"DON'T LEAVE ME BEHIND!" I rushed out the door, or at least I TRIED to until that Floppy-Christmas-Tree-Hat-Wearing-Know-It-All grabbed my arm.

"Don't even think about leaving without paying for your drinks! Too many people do that already! Club 64 is closing down soon because of people like you!" Uh-oh, he's making THAT face again. What is he gonna do to me? Am I gonna survive? Is he really going to...

"Here's your check. NOW PAY UP OR ELSE!" OH NO! IT'S JUST AS I EXPECTED! I was so scared, that I literally threw my wallet at him to knock him out, and avoid getting killed after he regains consciousness! I became so proud of myself that I ran to celebrate! Time to go back to my secret base located under Princess Peach's basement!

I am not responsible for three balloons popping, animal abuse, stealing coins, spending those coins on a poison mushroom, feeding it to a scam artist, child abuse, yelling into an elephant's ear, eating all of the cheese samples, having ADHD, being forgetful, stomping on grapes, or cutting drapes along the way. But an angry mob accusing me of doing those things is still chasing me! And even though I do have ADHD and forgetfulness, there's nothing wrong with that, so DEAL WITH IT!

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHH! I SWEAR I DIDN'T DO THOSE THINGS! AND THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH HAVING ADHD OR MEMORY DISORDERS, YOU PREGIDOUS RANDOM PEOPLE!" Yes, this time I'm telling the truth. I didn't do those things and I have no idea why they are blaming me for those things. Seriously, I don't. Oh well, time to get back to my super secret base!

End of Chapter 1

So what did you guys think of what I wrote?

Toon: It was pretty funny, but I don't appreciate you knocking me out...

Toadette: Uh-oh...

You're judging the way I do things, eh? Well, I can take you out of this story as easily as I brought you in. (Evil laugh)

Toon: Uh, never mind. By the way, is the captain still being chased?

Toadette and I: Yes.