Title: A Love Affair With Distance
Author: natushka & phantom
Summary: But self doubt and guilt were slowly eating him alive, and he started to wonder if perhaps he'd been wrong about Karen and Karen had been wrong about him, that maybe this love affair with distance they were carrying on wouldn't work.
Pairing: Bill/Karen, with a hint of Jack/Chloe
Rating: PG
Spoilers: Up until 6x19
Disclaimer: Sadly Bill and Karen are not ours. Elizabeth is though
A/N: This is our Baby, we cared for it, loved it, and watched it grow. It is complete and for me, ridiculously long. I'll add a long A/N at the end of the fic, just so I don't ruin it, also since the final, this kinda isn't canon anymore...
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Bill Buchanan looked out though his office window, staring without really seeing onto the ground floor of CTU. A few computer monitors glowed, illuminating the faces of the staff still working, the office relatively quiet after a full day.
His eyes tracked Chloe O'Brian, who was walking purposefully towards the stairs leading up to his office. He inwardly groaned. What ever it was, he didn't want to have to deal with it. Not now.
Chloe paused outside of his door, and with a wave of his fingers he allowed her to enter. He was standing in front of his desk, hand on his briefcase, paused to leave and he'd been working with Chloe long enough to realise he would have to speak first.
He cut her off before her mouth had even fully opened, "Is there anything that can't wait until tomorrow?"
She paused, then glanced down at the folders in her hand. He watched her brain working, then she looked back at him, "No..."
"Good." He moved before she could change her mind, "Then I'll talk to you tomorrow."
Picking up his briefcase, he moved around his desk and past Chloe, opening the door to let her out first. As she passed him, she paused in the door way and looked back at him.
"Are you going to see Karen then?"
Bill stopped, his eyes narrowing at her.
"I just assumed," Chloe stammered, hastily trying to explain, "Since she left those 5 messages today it would make sense that you would want to see your wife…I figured she must be back in LA. Not that its any of my business, it's just that I know that she's been in DC for a while now and that must be hard, especially after that day…" Chloe stopped, her facing screwing up, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't be-"
"Chloe," Bill cut her off gently, "Its ok. And no, Karen's still in DC."
"Oh" He watched her as the wheels turned over in her head and then she looked up at him, the tiniest of sad smiles hovered over her lips, her eyes conveying an understanding that he never thought he'd find from her. Then it was gone, and she stepped over the threshold, folders still in hand, "Well, goodnight then Mr Buchanan."
He stood there and watched her go down the stairs, a smile on his lips at the growth he'd seen in her during the small moments she offered every now and then. He noticed Jack waiting for her down by her station, an easily placed smile on his lips that Bill can't remember seeing on the younger man for a long time. Jack waited patiently as she shut down her computer and gathered her things, and as the banter flowed easily between them, Bill watched Jack slip his hand into Chloe's. She squeezed it tight, and as they rounded the corner Bill caught the smile directed at the other man, and he admired them for finally finding each other.
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Bill walked along the sidewalk, watching the evening traffic, his eyes occasionally glancing at the patrons of the numerous café's he passed. His eyes never lingered on one spot though, instead he let them pick up trivial detail while his thoughts wandered.
It had been 6 weeks since that day and he had been reinstated at CTU rather quickly, the call coming from the Vice President himself. He'd been almost too glad to be back at work, his days spent pouring himself into meetings and paperwork not giving him a chance to think about what had happened, and why the hell had he been reinstated? He'd heard it from Karen herself, DOJ were looking for a scapegoat and from what he'd heard, if was going to be him, or her.
The problem was that if he was back working for CTU then…
In the short times he'd spoken to her, she had never once mentioned if she had lost her job or resigned, and she was still in DC, so he could only assume. But most of her calls where strictly business related and she seemed to have the distinct ability to know when he was busy and couldn't take her call, leaving various messages on his voice mail.
Every time he called her office, she had her assistant filtering her calls like a hawk.
But one night fatigue and guilt must have got the best of her, and he'd been too tired and disorientated to get to his cell before she hung up. He listened to her message, hearing the exhaustion creeping into her voice and revealing more than she wanted. He couldn't get her whispered plea that she was so sorry out of his head.
He looked up from the side walk to see the familiar sign, worn with time and weather, the recognizable sound of bells as he pushed his way through the door. Instantly his senses were flooded with the smell of bacon and warm apple pie. He'd been a customer at this dinner for more than a decade, and was friends with the owner, Danny, a quite friendly guy, whose father had worked here all his life, until he passed it onto Danny and Danny one day hoped to pass it onto his son.
It was a warm, welcoming establishment, with parents and their children tucked into booths, and an old jukebox pressed against the far wall, around it the wall was covered in photos and old newspaper clippings from major events in LA that stretched over the past three decades.
His eyes scanned the patrons, searching out someone in particular. He spotted her in seconds, although there was nothing particular about her that set her apart from the crowd. She was facing him, but didn't see him across the crowded diner, the general murmurings of the cliental masking his entrance. He took a moment to study her as he made his way towards her, his eyes critical. Long dark hair fell down around her shoulders, framing her face. Crystal blue eyes finally caught a hold of his, and her smile at seeing him tugged at his heart. She stood as he approached, and he enveloped her in to his arms, breathing in her familiar sent of perfume.
For just a perfect moment, he and she were the only two people on the planet.
The moment passed, she pulled away, her eyes sparkling with the joy of seeing him. He smiled at her, giving her hand a final squeeze before they both sat across from each other.
"You look tired."
Typical, Bill thought, ignoring the comment as he settled his briefcase down by his feet. Under the table, identically placed, is the woman's own briefcase. Bill frowned.
"Working late, Elizabeth?" He enquired.
She gave him a tight smile, "I learnt that from my father."
"I never taught you that." Bill studied his daughters face again, searching for fatigue. Any indication he could find that she's been working herself too hard. Although fully grown, and recently married, Bill had never been able to shake his protectiveness of her.
"Oh no?" A delicate eyebrow raised, amusement on her words, "Just come from a game of croquet then, did you?"
He couldn't help the smile that tugged at his lips, she always was quick, her mind even sharper, one wrong word and she was waiting there to pounce on it, even as a child nothing got past her, as she got older it became a game of sorts who could out wit the other.
His silence answered the question for her.
"Ahh, that's what I thought. So again I say: you look tired."
He almost rolled his eyes, because as protective as he is of her, she's just as protective of him, the constant nagging that he works too hard might one day actually wear him into the ground before his job does.
He nodded to the waitress for coffee and waited until she had moved away before looking back up at his daughter.
"And again I'm going to ignore it."
"You know you didn't have to go back to work straight away." Her eyes are piercing now, and Bill – not for the first time – feels sorry for anyone sitting in a witness stand when she gets unleashed upon them. There is something scarily disquieting about those probing eyes, although they must be handy for her profession. He wondered if she isn't perhaps the most competent prosecutor in the country.
Bill suppressed the urge to snort his disagreement with her statement. He had spent enough time at home after that day... it was driving him insane. His house so deathly empty, with nothing but his thoughts to occupy him... nothing but his anger and his guilt. No... he was much better off working.
"It's Karen... isn't it?"
He closed his eyes and took a breath, then opened them back up to stare into Elizabeth's. Her hands were wrapped around her own coffee cup, and she looked genuinely concerned for him. He wished he could just ignore it. He'd become good at ignoring a lot of things lately.
"Everything's fine." He didn't know why be bothered lying. He hadn't been able to lie to her since she was eight years old.
"Dad, you know Karen feels incredible guilt for what happened that day, and all she wants to do is come home to you, but she's not going to until you let her know she's welcomed and you want her too." Elizabeth sighed and took a sip of her coffee.
Bill looked over at his daughter; she could be persistent when she wanted too. She'd been calling him for weeks asking when Karen was coming back to LA, he should have been over the moon that his daughter got on so well with Karen, that they spent time together going for coffee and shopping trips. Elizabeth had even taken Karen to a day spa for her birthday.
But now, it just served as a painful reminder of how things were before…
He continued to stare out the window, bitterness flowing through him.
"How would you know how she feels? You just want someone to go shopping with." he muttered, instantly feeling guilty for letting his irritation get the better of him.
Elizabeth, unfazed by her fathers jab or his disintegrating mood, continued to stare at him unflinching.
"I've spoken to her."
Instantly he stiffened, "You've spoken to Karen?"
"Well yeah, I figured when she said to me 'Don't hesitate to call' she actually meant it, plus I'm going to DC next week on business remember, and I wanted to make sure we could have coffee together." Elizabeth paused, looking pointedly at her father, her next words full of attitude, "Plus, I want to go shopping."
He rubbed a hand over his eyes, sighing, knowing there was so much more she wasn't telling him. Knowing his own daughter had been having longer conversations with his wife over the past four weeks then he had. The knowledge deflated him further, and suddenly the miles of separation between them seemed all too much. The stubborn game they were playing suddenly seemed too stupid and the idea of not having the woman he loved by his side threatened to overwhelm him, guilt slowly seeping through.
She watched him over the rim of her coffee cup, a wicked little grin twitching her lips as she watched the effect her words had had on him. She'd known, of course, how he would react. Her words had been chosen carefully. In fact, the entire conversation had been playing out in her mind for weeks now. Elizabeth knew her father almost better then she knew herself, and she had learnt from a very young age how to manipulate him. Although she never saw it that way. She was merely steering her father on to the best course.
Naturally, when she'd been younger, it had been so he would make the best decision regarding her Birthday present. As the years went by, however, she'd put it to better uses. Like now.
She reached out, placing her hand on top of his, her eyes full of concern, "She misses you."
She almost saw the fight literately drain from his body. Her three words sending another pang of guilt shooting through his body. Bill Buchanan suddenly felt the entire weight of Karen's absence crushing down on his shoulders. His heart ached and he wanted nothing better then to hold her in his arms...but it wasn't enough.
"It's complicated."
Inwardly she groaned in frustration. Maybe this was going to be harder than she thought, she could see it, he was safe in his little bubble of denial, and without Karen being in LA he didn't have to deal with the issue up front. He could just ignore it and hope that it'd work itself out or that Karen would ring him and make the first move. But she knew that wasn't the case.
They were so stupidly perfect for each, Karen as equally stubborn as her husband. She refused to return to LA until she knew they were ok, but still wouldn't make the first move, saying she was 'giving Bill time' to accept what she did and to come to terms with it. Elizabeth was hoping that seeing Karen next week face to face, she'd be able to convince her to come back to LA, to come back to her father.
She narrowed her eyes at him.
"Uncomplicated it then."
Bill suppressed a smile. He'd always admired his daughter's ability to be so straight forward. He liked to look on his daughter as an innocent by stander to the world... a step just aside of the crowd. She seemed to be able to watch them all, playing their games with each other, and marvel, without ever being caught up. She understood the way the world worked, participated and accommodated and had become wildly successful... all the while detached and composed and clear headed.
Bill had come to her, years ago now, when his relationship with Karen Hayes had moved beyond simple dinner's and coffee. Elizabeth had looked him straight in the eye and asked him if he loved her. When he answered yes, she had cut off any other objections he could have raised.
Her words had been simple enough.
"Then love her."
He wanted to be like his daughter, to be able to shrug off Karen's betrayal, to move on. He didn't want to hold on to it, and he needed Karen. She was the part of him he hadn't realized had been missing until she'd come into his life. He knew it was corny. He knew, sometimes, he was like a teenager, so in love with Karen it made him almost burst at just the sight of her. He couldn't let her go. He didn't think for a moment that it could be over. Wouldn't let himself think that it was a possibility.
But self doubt and guilt were slowly eating him alive, and he started to wonder if perhaps he'd been wrong about Karen and Karen had been wrong about him, that maybe this love affair with distance they were carrying on wouldn't work, and they weren't as perfect for each other as Elizabeth always made out.
It wasn't even the fact that she'd fired him that bothered him. He'd understood what she had to do; would have done the same thing if push came to shove. But it was the way she'd handled it, not letting him in, not letting them decide this together: the fact that hours earlier in the day she had been willing to quit her job to protect him, and then later he wasn't worth it.
She should have known he would have done the right thing, she did know, but was still willing to let him hang out to dry for it. God it still stung now.
"You know she resigned right? And that she's only staying in DC as a favor to Vice President Daniels until he can find her replacement?" Elizabeth stated as she leaned forward to place her empty coffee mug on the table.
Yes, he'd heard the rumor, but figured it was just that, a rumor, because she had yet to return to LA and to him and it made little sense for her to stay in DC if she'd actually resigned, unless she had resigned, and just didn't want to see him. He wanted to believe she was the one that fought for him to be reinstated as CTU director, and now with the news of her resignation, it makes him wonder if she took the fall after all.
All the what-ifs were frustrating him so much he almost wanted to just pick up the phone and call her to find out the truth.
He looked back up at Elizabeth, lost in thought; he'd almost forgot that she's there, but she has always had patient's beyond a saint when it comes to him. She smiled at him knowingly, almost as if she could read his mind.
"She made a mistake, but at least give her the chance to win back your trust."
He'd believed in second chances all his life, tried not to judge people too quickly and always gave people the opportunity to explain themselves... but Karen had broken on to ground still raw and tender from the last time.
He thought back to Elizabeth's mother, and how cliché his life had become when Elizabeth was still a young girl. Although at the time, Bill hadn't let himself believe his wife could be cheating on him, when he looked back, all the signs were there. But it hadn't seemed possible. Things like that only happened to other people, and he and his wife Susan had been so very much in love. Bill had long since moved on, but there was still a dull ache somewhere inside of him when he thought of her. Perhaps a reminder of his own stupidity. Susan had begged forgiveness when he'd caught her with another man. Begged at his feet and cried a river of tears... and forgiveness had come... It wasn't even weeks later that Bill had caught her again, so suspicious and alert now.
Bill remembered taking Susan back. And Bill remembered it blowing up in his face a second time. And so that tiny little voice inside of him couldn't help but ask if Karen might hang him out to dry again
He so desperately wanted to trust her again. He missed her. For spending almost a life time without knowing her, his world seemed so empty now. He didn't want to forget their history and their vows and their love. But a part of him was slowly trying to convince himself that it just was never meant to work between them.
He had no words for his daughter to explain that maybe he just wasn't strong enough to survive another heart break. Maybe a clean break was for the best…
"Dad!"
Bill's head shot up.
"Don't even think about it, and don't for a second think that I'd let you just walk away from her. Just because it hurts, because your hearts out there on the line as much as Karen's is. It won't be easy, but just don't give up on her okay?"
She could almost see the moment he shut down, closing himself off, and she knew what was coming next. She might just let him change this subject because she could see the toll the conversation was taking on him and she doesn't want to push him that much.
Bill straightened, nodding slightly.
"Let's talk about something else… How's work?"
He sat and listened to his daughter talk about her work, about her life, about being a newly wed, and he smiled and commented, watching her eyes shine, flecks of blue sparkling brightly and it made him feel so warm inside that she's happy and content because this is all he ever wanted for her, but he can't help but feel a sadness radiate through him, Elizabeth's words playing around in his head, and he can't help but think of Karen in DC, and wonder if she's ok and that if this whole mess is tearing her apart like it is him.
They mutually decide to call it a night once they realize how late it is and Bill pays for the cheque after they both fight over it for a minute or two. Holding the door open for her, they step out onto the street, the heavy evening traffic dispersed and left to a light flow of headlights.
Elizabeth slipped her hand into the crook of his elbow, sliding up close to her dad, resting her head on his shoulder as they walk. She raised her eyes and looked into his, care worn by the years, burdened with sadness and fatigue and the demands of his job. Familiar eyes she knows so well
Her heart breaks for him, this man who has done so much for her in this life, and asked for so little in return. She'd wept with joy the day he'd told her he was going to marry Karen... she'd thought that finally, her father had found someone he deserved, someone who made him truly happy. A sort of cosmic repayment. She wanted nothing else in this world then to see the joy return to his eyes.
"Dad." She stopped him before he could open her car door for her, and he looks at her questioningly, "You need a break." He opened his mouth to protest, but she cut him off, "And so do I. Please. I'm going to be in Chicago late next week, after my trip to D.C. Come with me? We can do all those stupid touristy things and be silly and make you feel better. What do you say?"
Bill can think back to the first time he saw those bright blue eyes pleading with him. He believes she was four at the time. And still, after all those years, he's no better at saying no now then he was then.
Karen Hayes flipped her phone open for the fourth time in the space of ten minutes. Elizabeth's not even late, she's just obsessively early. It's the first time in weeks she's actually been somewhere that doesn't include the White House and her apartment and when Elizabeth had called, Karen had been more than willing to take a break and go catch up with the younger woman over coffee.
The past few weeks had been… god, well a nightmare really. The fallout from the terrorist attacks had seemed to push everyone over the edge, not to mention President Palmers deteriorating health. Vice President Daniels was a fine substitute, but even she could see the toll that day had taken on him, especially the betrayal of his former lover. Cracks were beginning to form, and Tom and herself were left to hold the pieces together.
Even she wasn't untouched from that day. Her choices had done what seemed irreparable damage between her and her husband and god, if she could take it back she would, she would be completely unselfish and take the hit herself, like she'd end up doing anyway. But the whole thing still tore at her like it had happened yesterday. The pain of knowing she'd hurt him, maybe beyond repair, left her with the decision to stay completely away from him until he was ready to talk. With the exception of one night, where she had foolishly had one glass of wine too many with dinner, and the exhaustion from too many sleepless nights alone when she knew it didn't have to be this way, had her dialing his number.
"Karen!"
A voice startled her from behind, and she whirled around to find Elizabeth walking towards her, dressed like she'd just come from a meeting, the wind picking up and tossing her hair around her shoulders. Her ever present smile in place and Karen couldn't help but smile back; it was so good to see her.
Elizabeth pulled her in for a quick hug, then pulled back eyeing Karen critically, the older woman almost felt the urge to squirm. Elizabeth's clear blue eyes, identical to her fathers, bore down on her and were too much of a reminder of what she was missing. She bit her lip, waiting for Elizabeth to say something, the weight of her gaze staring through her and making her feel like she could see all her guilt and pain that she'd bottled up since that day.
Then Elizabeth softened her expression to one full of understanding and compassion and Karen felt herself visibly relax. A lump formed in her throat, and she could feel the first prickles of tears behind her eyes. Before she could even stop herself she asked, "How's Bill?"
"Being his usual, stubborn self." Was Elizabeth's reply, and Karen inwardly kicked herself. She'd promised herself she wouldn't involve Elizabeth into her domestics with Bill. She hadn't wanted to put the younger woman in the middle of them both.
Although friends first, Karen was Elizabeth's step-mother... the title of Bill's wife came with an almost automatic inclusion to care about Elizabeth as though she were her own child. And no mother wanted their child to witness the breakdown of their parent's relationship, no matter what the age of the child.
Elizabeth squeezed Karen's hand, "He's okay..." How could she tell her surrogate mother that the man she loved wasn't sleeping, didn't eat properly, and spent every moment he wasn't working moping about her – but still refused to do anything about it?
Karen smiled, a forced smile that didn't quite reach her eyes. She wasn't sure what she'd wanted to hear... but apparently that wasn't it. The first real doubts started to creep into her thoughts. Up until now, she'd been convinced that Bill would see reason, that, given time, he would forgive her, that they would talk and she could apologise and they would get back to the way things were. She'd never really entertained the idea that Bill wouldn't take her back.
But now... she started to wonder. Was Bill really okay? Had he so easily forgotten what they'd shared? Karen was a practical woman, she didn't believe in fate, or destiny, and she knew the foundations of her and Bill's relationship had been born from tragedy. But when they'd both emerged from mourning all those lives that had been lost the day they'd met, they'd emerged together. Karen had witnessed first hand the depths of Bill's feelings... had fallen in love with him when he was at his worst... and she still truly believed that their love was enough.
Was it now perhaps that Bill just didn't love her enough?
Elizabeth watched Karen carefully, saw her smile falter, saw the sadness in her eyes and instantly she knew Karen was struggling with this, just as much as her Father was. She knew that the normal strain of maintaining their long distance relationship before that day even happened was starting to get to them both, but now the added pressure of everything that had happened was taking its toll, every day they spent apart was just another lingering doubt now that they couldn't survive. In her head she knew that if something didn't give, they'd both give into self doubt and guilt and the marriage that had once been a savior for both of them would disintegrate.
Linking her arm through Karen's, she motioned the other woman inside of the small café and hoping to lift her mood she gave Karen her most devious grin.
"So Karen, tell me all the dirty White house gossip!"
Karen let out a chuckle, pushing all thoughts of Bill aside and concentrating on his daughter instead. She allowed the younger woman to steer her to a table and tried to keep all thoughts away from work and her personal troubles. Elizabeth had always been good company, and Karen didn't want to spoil what little time she had to spend with her focusing on Bill.
They settled themselves, Karen knowing that Elizabeth's comment was meant to be a quick, light change in subject, but there was some truth around it… she couldn't help but think about Vice President Daniels and the fact that he'd been sleeping with his Chief of Staff… and god hadn't that just been a mess and a half, that fact that she'd been sleeping with someone else who was spying on her for information-
Karen shook her head, smiling at Elizabeth.
"No dirty gossip… we're all workaholics, you know that." She paused until a waiter poured coffee for her, then looked back at Elizabeth, "How's work? Are still saving humanity by locking the bad away and providing justice to the wronged?"
Elizabeth rolled her eyes, and laughed. "You know it... one bad guy at a time... actually, Karen, speaking of bad guys..."
Karen wasn't sure, but had Elizabeth started talking just that little bit faster?
"... there is a seminar in Chicago at the end of this week dealing with behavioral science. How to better understand body language and speech nuances, that sort of thing. I know you've been wanting to get a better understanding, and I could always do with a refresher course. Will you be free?"
Karen only had to take a minute to think. Of course she would be free, her replacement would be at the White House by then. They would, officially, no longer need her. Karen felt a hard lump form somewhere between her stomach and her chest at the thought of, literately, having no where to go.
But she knew a weekend with Elizabeth would be a welcome change. She should figure something out.
"Of course I'd love to come."
Elizabeth smiled, practically split her face open at the news, but instead of wondering at the other's over reaction, all Karen could think about was how much like Bill she was.
Bill Buchanan's daughter never usually jumped to conclusions. She was methodical and painstakingly thorough when making decisions. Not that she wasn't ever spontaneous - the first time she met her husband had certainly been a night for random acts – but as a general rule, she liked to get all the facts before committing herself.
However, the moment she saw her father, only a bare week after their dinner at the diner, Elizabeth was certain he'd forgotten to actually sleep the entire time. It would have almost been comical, this man in his expensive suit, immaculate tie and leather briefcase looking like he'd spent a night binge drinking, if it didn't break her heart.
By the time they'd landed in Chicago, she'd learnt that yes, he had slept, and no, he didn't want to talk about it. His behavior confused her since usually they talked about everything. But then she supposed she'd never actually seen her father with heartbreak before. She was only a toddler when her parents had split. She barely remembered, let alone had insight into her father's feelings at the time. It was tragically sad and not a little pathetic, because really, she mused, as they claimed their baggage, he was doing this to himself.
Admittedly, she'd gone over the top trying to get him out of his mood, but it was vital to her that he not spend their spontaneous vacation wrapped in his blanket of guilt and regret. She dragged him into a small souvenir shop just after they'd had lunch and with a pair of ridiculous sunglasses and giant hat declaring 'I love Chicago' he'd finally cracked a smile, shaking his head and laughing at her.
On the walk back to their hotel they were staying at, he had wrapped his arm around his daughter's shoulders and pulled her closer, squeezing her shoulder gently. The last of the tension draining from his body letting him relax. Pressing a quick kiss into her hair, he leant down and whispered thank you into her ear.
Bill wondered if perhaps this holiday was what he needed after the last week had passed in a complete caffeinated blur. The words from his daughter had stuck in his head and left him to think about nothing else. Although work had been a welcome distraction, even it hadn't been enough to take his mind completely from his emotional turmoil. What was worse, as his time apart from Karen dragged on, he was even starting to feel a little foolish.
The longer their separation continued, the more Bill couldn't help but think it was his fault. Not necessarily the fight between them, but the overall backlash of the entire affair.
Elizabeth had been right. Not that Bill had ever known his daughter to be wrong, and not that she'd ever said it outright, but Bill realised the underlying meaning behind her words. He was being a complete idiot. If nothing else, Karen deserved better from him. He knew his anger and his resentment at being fired had been justified, but Karen deserved a chance to make it up to him. He owed her that. He owed their relationship that. Their marriage. Bill had vowed to love Karen until the day he died, and he couldn't believe he'd been seriously considering throwing that away at the first roadblock they hit.
He knew he was out of practice. He'd spent too many years being alone, and only having to worry about his own feelings. He'd become selfish. He only hoped, now that he'd had his sudden epiphany, that Karen still wanted him.
He wanted to talk to Elizabeth about it more. To try and gauge what Karen's reaction would be to his making contact. If she'd receive him. He knew Elizabeth had spent some time with her during the week, he figured she would have an updated version on Karen's feelings.
As they walked through the hotel lobby, stopping at the elevator, Bill turned to face his daughter.
"Elizabeth… I'm thinking about going to DC next week to see Karen…" He paused, trying to find the right words, because he never really asked for his daughters help during all of this, she just seemed to situate herself in the middle, even though she loved both of them. But he was determined to fix this himself, and it just seemed ridiculous to be asking Elizabeth, 25 years younger than him, and only recently wed for help with his own marriage. God he was the Father here, he was supposed to be giving her the advice, helping her.
But being in the middle had its advantages and Elizabeth had the unique gift of being unbiased.
"I was just wondering if you thought it would be too much... if maybe I should just call her instead?" He stopped again, sighing.
Elizabeth reached out and touch his arm gently, Bill's eyes flicking up to hers and she smiled softly at him. "Dad, I think she'd love to see you."
"Yeah?" Bill said, a hint of a smile on his lips, "I mean good, I'll go next week then."
For the first time in weeks Bill felt lighter, the weight suddenly lifted. He could see Elizabeth's relief in her eyes, the way she seemed to be containing her excitement that he was finally going to fix this, that finally Karen might come home and they could hopefully pick up where they left off. He had to look away from his daughter so she wouldn't see him smiling stupidly to himself.
And that's when he saw it, the flash of a familiar blonde walking across the hotel lobby, cell phone at her ear.
He blinked, wondering if maybe the week had finally caught up with him and he was hallucinating. The blonde disappeared behind a support pillar just as the elevator arrived. Elizabeth, not catching her father's distraction, took a step forward, but Bill stood rooted on the spot.
Had it really been her?
"Dad?" Elizabeth frowned, ignoring for a moment the other passengers of the elevator who glared at her while she kept the door open.
"Just a minute." Bill took a step forward, still undecided. To his logical mind, there was no way Karen could be in Chicago. But there was no way he was walking away from the lobby without checking. Another step, this time to the right his eyes sweeping over a small waiting lounge. Elizabeth watched her Father move away from the elevator, turning to smile apologetic at the other passengers, she moved off, letting the doors close as she followed her father.
Maybe he was just imagining things, and he almost had to laugh at the irony.
But…
Frowning he scanned the crowd again, forcing himself to slow down…
And then he saw her, her back slightly to him, but he had no doubt in his mind that it was Karen, even after months of separation. Her blonde hair, longer now, swirled around her shoulders as she moved, her sharp designer suit sleek and molded to her curves perfectly, the skirt dropping just above her knees and as always, her ever present black heals giving her that inch that Bill knew she loved. She looked like she'd lost weight which meant she was working too hard and eating less, an occupational hazard she'd called it the first time he'd noticed early in their relationship.
But still, she's the most beautiful thing he's seen in months.
She moved again, turning slightly, her cell phone still at her ear, the diamonds on her wedding band catching the light and sparkling brightly.
"Karen..." He breathed, and he's absolutely sure she couldn't have heard him from across the lobby, but she turned anyway, cell phone still to her ear.
Her eyes widened, and she stopped, then carefully snapped shut her phone without another word and everything else seems to fade into the background. The people bustling around the lobby, the bell boys hauling luggage, the child that just wouldn't stop crying and all the constant niggling in the back of his mind about how they might not make it, just disappeared and its just him, and its just her, like the day it was when they first met and he was asking her to breakfast.
"Dad," he heard Elizabeth next to him, but he can't take his eyes from Karen, because if he does she just might disappear again, "Call me when you and Karen want to have dinner tonight, ok?"
He felt her kiss his cheek then and he looked down for a brief second to see a look of smugness on her face. If he'd give himself time to contemplate, he'd probably come to the conclusion that she had something to do with Karen standing bare meters from him, but he doesn't because he's nodding at her and moving towards Karen before he can even think about anything.
It took him mere seconds to reach her, but it might as well have been hours. Days. A lifetime or two. Over the crowded lobby, two people who were so lost suddenly found each other, their eyes locked as they both dodged the pedestrian traffic unconsciously.
They stood facing each other, Karen's fingers wrapped so tightly around her cell phone that her knuckles were white. Her face betrayed her confusion, her eyebrows knitted together while she tried to process the sudden turn of events.
It was like the entire world had slowed down. Karen could have written a thesis between the time they stood facing each other to the moment Bill made his first move. Almost as if he didn't believe she was really there, he reached out with his hand, the back of his fingers gently brushing the edge of her cheek.
Her eyes closed at the feel of him, the dull ache in her heart suddenly flaring.
Her name bubbled to his lips and it was the sweetest thing she'd ever heard. His hand traveled down from her cheek, his fingers gently brushing her body until it reached her hand. His fingers curled around hers, and his other hand, by its on violation, pushed her hair from her eyes.
She opened her mouth to speak, but he silenced her with his finger against her lips, all the time not ever breaking contact with her eyes.
As his finger retracted, he bent down to kiss her, and the moment before his lips met hers stretched into eternity. She unconsciously squeezed his hand tighter, as his other hand weaved into her hair pulling her closer, hoping she would understand how much he wanted this, how much he needed this, how much he still loved her.
When he kisses her, it's just barely a brush of lips, tender and warm and she can't help but feel a shiver run down her spine, the kiss a sweet prelude for things that will come later.
Bill pulled back only slightly, letting his nose bump against hers gently as he smiled down at her softly just absorbing the moment, letting them just be. She's been gone for so long he doesn't want to let her go again, and he knows they have things to talk about, and things to sort out, but he can't bring himself to say anything because he can finally feel her skin beneath his fingertips and smell her perfume and it just reminds him how badly he did miss her.
Karen smiles up at him beautifully, a tad shy, not knowing what comes next, her thoughts whirling around her head to fast to give one preference, but then Bill tugs on her hand making the decision for her and whispers.
"Come home."
fin
A/N 2:Its funny how this fic actually came around, and its even funnier that phantom still claims not to be a Bill/Karen shipper.
It started as an innocent conversation between two friends, and I commented about the 24 ep where Milo sadly bit the bullet, and I was like "OMFG BILL COULD HAVE DIED!" clings to him and phantom turned around and said for some reason, she pictured Bill with this fully grown daughter, and from their Elizabeth was born, though she didn't have a name and there was no fic, just a crazy idea by two people who obviously did nothing at work. I wrote this random conversation between Liz and Bill that was supposed to be pre-season 6 and then phantom was like, "Oh I thought it was post season 6" so from there we took this convo, rewrote it, and rewrote it, and then decided, ok, wow, this could actually work.
I must say big thanks to phantom for actually writing this with me, cause again, she still maintains she ISN'T a Bill and Karen shipper, but still she held steady the hold time. Thanks Champ.
