Urgh. I don't know what came in my mind... I should be updating my other stories (in particular SSN... I'm so sorry ne) and more than that I really should be studying for my exams, surely NOT stay in front of the computer typing an other fic... an other sucking and useless fic... sorry, sorry, sorry... please forgive me ne...
I thank the very kind and nice persons who got worried about me. I give a too big thank you to: Gallatica-shi, Am1-13th-san and Konzen-san (ok, I know Konzen-san doesn't read yaoi...). I owe you one, gals. But please, don't worry about me. I'm just a stupid and an idiot, I don't deserve it, plus I don't want you to lose your precious time. It's ok. Take care ne? Ja...
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~"The smile of dawn
arrived early May
she carried a gift from her home"~
"No," Genjo Sanzo snorted to himself while gazing with REMARKABLY peeved air at his non-progressing work on the LCD display of the laptop opened in front of him and giving vent to part of his burning anger with mighty clicks at full speed on the left button of his black infrared mouse. It was not possible, you understand, it was not mathematically possible that on the face of the earth could exist someone such idiot, stupid, annoying, tiresome and chatty, and above all it was even more impossible that that noisy load of foolishness were in his house. He had known that damned golden-eyed boy only for a week, but he already was feeling that he had had enough of him for this life, the next, the next-next and the one after.
"That's ENOUGH!!!" he eventually burst while the values of the limit towards which his patience was trending were more and more getting closer to the negative infinity, "SHUT UP OR I'LL KILL YOU, STUPID SARU!!" he thundered seizing the first object within reach on the desk and flinging it at the youth who was airily walking back and forth in his study reading aloud the history lesson.
"Oooow-- HEY!!! THAT HURT!!!!" the other, nettled, said picking up from the floor the big white rubber which had hit him above the temple. "Why did you do it, Sanzo??"
"And you ask me!!" Sanzo sent him a ferocious look, "I told you 2,940 times to shut up, here there's someone who has to write a thesis, for your information!" he yelled casting a glance at his work which, since when Goku had begun to come to his place everyday after the school and the part-time job, was proceeding VERY, VERY, VERY slowly.
The trouble was that Sanzo knew well what he had to do if he wanted to be able to type in peace: it would have been sufficient not open the door to Goku, not let him in, not answer when he ringed the bell-- yet... yet he couldn't do it, and each evening Goku regularly was in his flat, "Sanzo I've come to visit you!" he used to say all cheerful when the blond asked him with icily voice what the heck he was doing there again. The more Sanzo tried to understand what prevented him from throwing that plaintive saru out, the more he got angry for not finding a reason, with consequential increase of his I'm-too-stressed-and-not-even-I-can-sleep super headache. About a thing Sanzo was sure, tough: the reason had nothing, I repeat, absolutely NOTHING to do with the quick kiss that he and Goku had shared the day after having met, or all the less with the longer and deeper one of the following evening.
"But uff, Sanzo!" the saru was whining massaging the injured head. "Reading aloud when I study helps me to memorize! I can finish in much less time!"
"Then go study in an other room and close the doors, damn it!"
"Noooooooo!!! Sanzoooo!! I want to stay with youuuu!! Ne Sanzo!!" Goku raised his immense and limpid golden eyes on the older man.
"Ch'..." the other said bringing the flame of the lighter to the end of the cigarette that he had just sticked in his mouth. "If you want to stay here, sit down, shut up, and don't dare disturb me, otherwise you're dead. Got it, saru?" he threatened putting on his reading glasses which corrected his very slight short-sightedness.
"But--" Goku attempted one last complaint which he stopped immediately tough, owing to the hypermegatronic-fearful-death-glare that withered him on the spot. Sanzo kept on scowling at the kid until the latter, with resigned air, sat cross-legged on the floor covered with the green moquette, with the schoolbook opened in one hand and a stub of a pencil in the other, the face concentrated in an attempt to decipher something very probabily too much incomprehensible for his limited monkey brain.
Grumbling for irritation, the golden-haired man resumed the thread of his work trying to exploit to the utmost the few minutes of silence that, he knew, wouldn't last long. Not in the least in fact his threats, his spurting-homicial-instincts glares, his explicit requests for silence or the blows of his stiff note-folder were effective: if they could silence Goku it was just for the time he needed to write two succint lines or to quickly consult a half-page of the notes.
Besides, it seemed that the saru wanted at any cost to unremittingly stay with him: he followed him in every room he went, also when he went to the bathroom he waited for him out of the door, and if he had to go out to buy, for example, the cigarettes, he walked with him, without in the meanwhile stopping the babble for a moment. Genjo Sanzo knew he was the only graduand in the entire chemical engineering course who could boast of knowing thoroughly all the various ranges of produces sold in the music shop where Goku worked three afternoon a week, all the details about his imminent high-school-leaving examinations as well as the complete list of monkeys' favourite foods, with a special mention for the sweets. "Urusai!" after a little time the exasperated blond used to shout with the neurons in full homogeneous endothermic reaction, and right down an other strike with his folder, which shut Goku up the time necessary for the kid to come out of a daze. And just think that the first time they had met they had passed together about two hours without Goku saying a word.
For Sanzo it was unbelievable that someone could address him so cheekily, that someone could dare his burning anger. Nobody had never ventured to take so much liberty with him; nobody had never ventured to get so close to him. The only person with whom the amethyst-eyed man accepted to interact were the collaborators at university, silent and intelligent persons who minded their own business and followed their projects, surely not some meddlesome and sniveller brats who nearly turned to him calling him "Sanzoooooo!!!".
"Sanzoooooo!!!"
That is, precisely.
"Maybe it wasn't understood!" the fair-haired growled waving the white and brown folder, "I said shut up, is it clear? Or it is a too difficult concept, I have to explain it to you with some punches?"
"But Sanzo, I'm hungry!"
An other thing over which Sanzo couldn't get was the golden-eyed boy's voracity. He never stopped eating without being full, yet he was thin and also a bit short for his age. Sanzo had to lock the kitchen in order to arrive at the morning with something more in the refrigerator than half pot of coffee-yoghurt.
"Really, Sanzo!! I can't bear it any more, I'm hungry!"
"What does it mean, you're hungry?? You've just finished two packs of biscuits!"
"That's it: they aren't enough for me!"
"I don't care at all! And then, can you explain me how can you study if you are distracting every moment?"
"But I can't study with an empty stomach!! Pleaseeeee!!"
Sanzo chose to keep on staring indifferently at the flashing cursor on the screen, ignoring the little saru who was dancing around him undeterred whining and giving him the imploring eye.
"Hush, you baka nagging saru!" he finally cried exasperated, cracking the boy's head with two folder-blows.
"Itaiiiiiiii!!!! Sanzo!!! You are mean, mean, meaaaaaaan!!"
The older man rolled his eyes bringing a hand on his face and then making it slide on the cheek as a prop, after having leant his elbow on the desk. "Listen, but you, don't you have a house?" he asked placing an other cigarette between his lips.
"Eh? Of course I have, you know it" Goku answered puzzled, standing beside him.
"So why don't you go back? It's also late" Sanzo said pointing to the night's dark sky out of the window.
Goku immediately replied, "Because I like staying here! This house gives me calm and quiet!", a great smile lit up his open face.
Sanzo stood up from the chair and leant against the external edge of the desk, parallel to the door. He raised an eyebrow, "This house gives you calm and quiet?" he asked turning a brief look to his very normal condominium flat, a sitting-room in the entrance, his bedroom, a narrow corridor, a bathroom, a kitchen with balcony and the little room that he used as study.
Goku sent him a surprised glance, as if cast doubts on his preceding affirmation were a so strange thing. "Yes," he confirmed without exitation.
Sanzo held the cigarette between the fingers of his right hand. "You really don't seem to me the type who needs calm and quiet" he said.
Goku's expression changed within a second and his eyes suddenly darkened, like if a sad and at the same time enraged shadow had fallen upon him. "And what do you know?" he said harshly, looking the blond straight in the eyes. Then he turned his back on him, bending down to pick up the sheets with his notes that he had left lying about here and there. "Sorry" he quickly said, shoving by force the sheets in the schoolbag not caring about their conditions.
Sanzo said nothing. Even if he didn't expect such a reaction he took good care not to show it, plus, he didn't find it a so strange reaction in consideration of the fact that Goku had tried to kill himself only some days ago. He followed with his eyes the eighteen-golden-eyed boy who had fastened the schoolbag and thrown it over one shoulder, making for the door. He already had the hand on the study's doorknob and was about to turn to greet Sanzo, when the latter anticipated him.
"Are you going?" the purple-eyed man asked, with a cold frown.
"I'm going," the other affirmed as much frostily, pulling on a light-weight orange jacket.
Sanzo slightly bent sideways the head weighing up the figure of Goku from behind in front of him, soft short chocolate-hair with the fringe barely held back by a white band, the youthful and polished features which still kept the traits of the adolescence, the thin arms the colour of the bronze interrupted only by the black armband that Goku always wore a bit above the left wrist. He chewed a moment the cigarette stub, "Goku--"
"I'm sorry" the other said, "I'm really sorry. Neh, see you!" the kid turned with an immense smile that Sanzo didn't had a hard job to recognize as false. Goku passed in corridor, "And don't overwork, mind you!" he added jumping to the front door and opening and reclosing it in a flash.
Sanzo found himself in the darkness of his corridor staring at the brown door.
He returned in the study and switched off the halogen lamp putting on instead the little one he kept on the desk; he pulled the curtains to the window, then he made a cup of coffee and at last he rearranged himself on the chair ready to resume the drawing up of his degree thesis which by now was languishing there from who-knows-how-much.
While for the umpteenth time he pressed the cancel button, he called himself idiot moron infinite times for wishing it was already the late afternoon of the following day, when Goku would have come back.
The day after Goku didn't show himself up.
Not even the next one.
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"Fuyu no kurai silhouette" means "Winter dark silhouette".
I hope someone can forgive me. *bows*