My first story so, yeah. Sorry if it's poor.
The narrative will get a bit intense at times so be warned. I don't particularly want to say how because it will kind of ruin the suspense but I will say in the header of the chapter.
If you want to review it will be appreciated :)
January 5, 2017.
…
There are many things I have come to regret in my life; things I have done, things I have said. Most are suppressible, as they were in-avoidable, however, when it comes to the concerns of my brother, I can say there is not a day that goes by in which I do not think about the pain and sorrow I have caused him. Sometimes I try to convince myself that he deserved what he got, that what I did was justifiable, but he didn't. Nobody deserves to be treated in such despicable a way, least of all my little brother.
The guilt I feel never subsides. Every time I look at him I can only see what I've done to him. If I had only been brave enough, been the brother I was supposed to be, then perhaps he wouldn't have ended up the lifeless shell of his former care-free, happy, self.
I feel I've failed him in every way; as a mentor, as a friend, and, most of all, as an older brother. This feeling had never been more prominent, in gut, chest and mind, as the night I stood alone on Waterloo Bridge having let him slip from my finger. I let my one and only treasure, and my one last chance, escape me. I feel as if I didn't even put up a fight, and for that I will be haunted for the rest of my days.
I do not deserve Sherlock Holmes. I can only hope that the countless pieces I have shattered my brother's debilitated soul into can be graphed and glued back together by the fidelity and unwavering support of his beloved friends and that they can forgive me for all I have done to him. I know he will never be the same, but I pray that he will be mended to a degree that he may find sanctuary and warmth in their company and embrace, and that he might, one day, be happy again. But above all else, I want him to find love… The love which had so cruelly been battered from his kind and joyful spirit, and the love I was never strong enough to provide.
…
Mycroft Holmes.