A/N: Here's a fic my *horrible* friend prompted me with. I really should NOT throw another work into my rotation with 3 open fics running but dammit, I can't turn this down. Rated 'T' for now, 'M' to come. If you enjoy, please drop a line! If you don't, that's okay too!
Her head throbbed as she slowly started to wake. Maura knew she'd had a little more wine than was typical but she didn't think she'd had enough to cause a headache. The nights events began coming back in drops.
"Jane, you've had too much to drink. That is not some magical amulet. It's someone's lost necklace."
Jane gave a grin. "It so could be. All we have to do is touch it at the same time and say, 'I wish I had your life.' Come on. It's worth a try. If it's not an amulet, there's nothing to be afraid of," she taunted.
"You are acting like a child, Jane." Maura huffed slightly.
"But you're touching it. So come on. On three. One...two...three."
'It was a silly little lark,' Maura told herself as she stretched. Oddly, her hands ached. They never ached. The room came into focus and she realized it was not her room. It was Jane's. Looking at her aching hands she was startled to see they were Jane's as well. "What the-" She dashed over to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. The reflection looking back was Jane's. "Oh my god! This isn't real. It's a dream. A strange dream!" She looked down and noticed hard nipples under Jane's t shirt and a very familiar tingle started between her legs. "Okay...that's rather real. That must mean Jane is in me!" Maura rushed to Jane's closet and found something to wear. Oddly, not fusing with fashion for once. She fumbled for Jane's phone and dialed hers. Fortunately Jane didn't answer. She realized it would be easier to explain in person. If any of this was easy, that is.
She rushed across town, breaking her own code and using the siren in Jane's car. Panic was all she felt, worried Jane would wake just as confused and freaked out as she had been. As she got to her own block Maura switched the light and siren off and pulled into her drive. She found her house key on Jane's keyring and quickly rushed inside.
"Not even going to say hello to your mother?" Angela's tone sharing her feeling.
"An- uh, Ma, I'm running late. I have to go see Maura about something. I'll be right back. I'm sorry."
Angela looked started at Jane's interaction but let it be.
Maura bounded up the stairs taking two at a time until she got to the top. She knew she should knock but it was an emergency. "Jane!" she went inside, finding her friend still asleep. 'God, do I look that strange sleeping? Focus, Maura!' She went over and gently shook Jane's shoulder. "Jane, you have to wake up!"
"Five more minutes, Maur," it registered, though hazily, the voice coming out wasn't her own. Jane opened her eyes and almost screamed. Maura put her hand over Jane's mouth gently.
"I know! I know! I don't know how to explain this. There is nothing scientifically capable of explaining anything even close." She gently took her hand away. "I'm sorry. I didn't want you to scream and scare your mother. Or my mother?"
Jane still looked confused but waved her hand. "You can have her. What exactly are we gonna do?"
"Going to do, Jane. If you're going to be me it's more plausible if you sound like me in speech pattern." Maura pointed out.
"Oh crap. I am nowhere as smart as you. This is not gon-going to work! People are going to think we're nuts."
Maura sighed. "I don't know what else to do. We're stuck for the moment so we just have to try."
Jane gave a sly smile. "Well, I have always wanted to," she lifted her own shirt and looked down. "My god! Those are huge!"
"Jane! Stop looking at my breasts!" Maura protested.
"Technically they're mine right now," she grinned as she began feeling. "Wow...they are really, really responsive."
"You can play with with me later, Jane! Come on!"
Maura couldn't explain to herself in that moment why watching herself touch herself was so arousing. 'It's just some narcissistic response, I'm sure,' she told herself.
"Fine," Jane pouted as she stopped. "It doesn't take a lot to get you hot, does it?" She glanced down to Maura's privates.
"I-it's natural, Jane! Just go shower. I'll find an outfit."
Jane got up, taking off Maura's things as she went. "I knew you didn't sleep in panties," she called out as she turned on the shower.
"Jane! Just get dressed." Maura rummaged through her closet.
"That's Dr. Isles," Jane shot back as she got in the shower.
Maura sighed. "I do not have anyone on a personal level call me that, Jane. That's pretentious and despite what you think, I am not pretentious."
"Knowing you sleep without panties proves that, Maur," Jane said with a grin in her voice.
"Make sure you use the keratin conditioner in my hair please? There's no need to fully wash but it helps keep my hair silky."
Jane chuckled as she reached for it. "Yeah, you're not pretentious, Maur."
Finally finding an outfit and now moving to shoes, Maura was too focused to be frustrated with her friend.
"Hello there. You're completely bare, Maura! How did you get that? I always have-"
"Stubble. I noticed. I wax, Jane. Will you please finish up and come out? I have to do my hair and get you dressed."
When she finished, she shut off the water. "Alright, alright." Maura was standing, towel in hand waiting. "Maura! You almost scared the hell outt-out of me!" She took the towel.
"I've seen myself naked countless times. There's nothing to hide."
Jane wrapped up in it and stood as Maura came around with another towel for her hair. "I guess now you've seen me naked too."
"I did have to dress, yes." Maura noted as she patted her hair in the towel. "Most people scrunch their hair. That leads to damage. I find patting and," then she rolled the hair in the towel "rolling to be more effective. Now, here," she reached for the drawer with her blow dryer "is-"
"I think I can manage drying hair, Maura. I'm not an idiot. I don't have Vidal Sassoon on speed dial or anything."
Maura plugged in her dryer and grabbed a few brushes. "There are so many reasons that point is obsolete. First off-"
"Maura, just do it," Jane interjected. "Like you said, we don't have time. Though I guess now I'm gon-going to have to be all wordy like you."
"Just say you have a sore throat so you can't talk, Jane," Maura shot.
"You can't lie," Jane teased as Maura got to her hair.
"It is a psychological effect you don't have, Jane. My body will react to your emotions, not mine right now. You'll be fine." She began brushing out her hair before grabbing some product and applying it.
Jane really liked how it felt to have Maura tending to her. Granted, it was like she was tending to herself, but Jane still enjoyed. "I think for as long as we have this situation, you're going to have to do this. I can't remember all these things."
Maura stopped for a moment and thought about it. "It wouldn't seem overly strange if I - you, stayed over. We've done it before. And we could just say you're - I'm, I'm having PTSD issues over Hoyt."
"Good idea," Jane nodded. "I mean not that we want to spread it around, really. I do have a rep to maintain."
"I doubt anyone would question, Jane. Your mother doesn't say a word. It's like we're a couple to everyone or something," Maura finished up her hair. "There, perfect."
Jane felt a lump in her throat at the idea. 'A couple...I'd like that.' "Glad you're happy. You didn't do too badly with my outfit there either."
Maura looked down. "They are just jeans and a Red Sox tee. Not suitable for work."
"Well, that's where you're lucky professor because it's my day off. You have time to figure out how to reverse this and move some of my clothes over here."
Maura's eyes got wide. "Your mother quit the Division One, Jane. She'll be here...all day. What do I do?"
"Calm down, Maura," Jane rested her hands on Maura's shoulders to ground her. "Go back to my place. Tell Ma you'll be back later if she want's to chat and I'll text you before I head home. Oh fuck! How am I supposed to be you? I don't know all that medical stuff." Suddenly Jane finally panicked.
"Jane, you'll be fine. Keep up with the sore throat act and have Susie run point. You just check reports. And by that, just snap pictures of what you don't understand and send them to me, alright? I hope I can get this resolved for us today. Otherwise we are both going on a very unscheduled leave of absence."
Jane grinned. "That is so not going to help the couple rumors."
"We don't have time or energy to care about that right now, Jane. Y-I'm going to be late to work. Come on. Let's go get some breakfast."
"Maura, I'll be fine. I'll grab something on the way. I know I know. You never do that but again, we're running out of time and you need to get back to my place and working on this, okay?"
She rolled her eyes and nodded. "Okay, fine. I laid my clothes out over there. Your bag is already packed. Phone, purse and such," she pointed.
"I know, Maura. I've been in your room before, remember? We've fallen asleep in here quite a few times, actually."
Maura forced herself to keep focus and not linger on other thoughts. "That is true, Jane. I'll see you later." She headed for the bedroom door and shut it behind herself. Fortunately Angela had gone back to the guest house and she made a quick, easy exit. 'How the hell am I going to figure any of this out?'