Today I woke up and I just knew it was a good day.

So my life is changing. Every part of that change is making me beautiful.

Today I cleaned my room.

I did the dishes, and the laundry.
I blasted music and danced around the house.

I felt his face melt away.

He no longer holds me.

Tomorrow will be even better. I will wake up, I will go to class registration. I will make my life blossom.

I seem to be falling into my own sync.

No more movie morphine. I'm ready for the world again.

I forgot how much I missed dancing out loud.
It's not as much fun in your head.

So for the first time since him, I danced, barefoot around my kitchen. And I felt free.

It's a good day to be.

My life is turning into a symphony.

Weather in minor or Major. It's something I'm composing.

And it's beautiful.

Thank god for sunsets. I wish sunrises were as welcoming.

I'm alive.

And the pain, just makes you remember how alive you really are.

It's just one giant catch and release.

I'm ready to hit eject.

Maybe even shed a tear or two.

Give it a couple years.

My drum beats to wildly for normal.

Screw normal.

I need a catcher in the field. The rye was never so much as a lie as it was to me.

I forgot I could bleed. I guess I always knew I could. I just preferred to turn my head while the tubes were hooked up.

So here is the real question, can I save my own life?

Every journey begins with the first step right?

Here is my first step.

I'm taking my life into my own hands.

People say adventures are best left to the strong of heart.

I must have the most sensitive heart.

I cry when He doesn't call.

I freak out when he doesn't say he loves me.

I am insecure and wild. I laugh way too freaking loud.

I snort when I'm being tickled.

My mood swings are about as common as the rain.

And as different as every drop.

It would take a real man to hold onto me.

No wonder he failed.

Have you ever heard the story of the tortoise and the hare?

The one where the tortoise takes his time, keeps his pace steady and secure while the rabbit runs off full speed.

The rabbit is so far ahead at one point he decides to take a nap, meanwhile, the tortoise

I'm the Harris.

Im a hybrid. A slow, lazy nap taker who is inspired enough to make it to the finish line, even though it turns out I'm going the wrong way. You got it. I'm the type of person to start at the finish and end up in Nebraska somewhere sipping cider and singing Christmas carols in July.

At least I'm not boring.

I feel something so strong pulling me away.

I am finally awake.

Nobody can change me.

And that thought alone can shake me down to the core.

I am strong.

Baby I am strong.

I am trying to forget him.

I can't.

I will always remember him.

Always.

But I will learn to live with the memory.

It makes me feel loved.

Scared that I no longer have that.

I will have that love again.

I will.

I'm learning so much about myself.

I dream of living in a little house on the beach with my dog. Having a white comforter. Waking up, going for a walk on the beach. Making breakfast. Living my life. Going to work, having a good career. That is the life I am looking forward too.