She was revered as a hero by most of the world, but she certainly didn't feel like one ninety-nine percent of the time. Sure, there was the one percent when she blew up a sun or solved a particular difficult, life threatening problem just in the nick of time, but ninety-nine percent of the time she felt like any other ordinary woman doing the best she could in the midst of tragedy. The majority of the time she was just getting along, telling herself that she did make a difference, that her sacrifice had meant something in the history of her planet. In the lives she had saved, even though the one lost wounded her more deeply than the thought of the every other person on the earth being scratched from existence.
Nearly every night she fell asleep with tears as her companion as she hugged a pillow tightly to her chest. No one could ever repair the damage that had been done, and she wasn't so sure she wanted anyone to. Her friends had certainly tried, but there was no consoling her. It was as if a piece of her was gone and could never be replaced, which was exactly what had happened. The pain may have dulled with time, but she knew it would never completely disappear for good. The love she had felt would never die, despite the object of her affections doing just that.
The arms of sleep soon found her, posing as smooth, soft arms that had once soothed her and coaxed her to relax on so many nights. She relaxed, leaning back into the woman's embrace she knew so well. "Janet," she whispered, finally drifting into a light sleep.
Vala sighed, a tear running down her own face as she brushed a few blonde hairs away from Sam's face and her arms tightened around the woman she had found herself falling for. She knew she would always be in the shadow of Sam's previous lover, but somehow that was all right by her. She was in Sam's bed, she told herself as she settled down to sleep beside the dozing form of the woman she desired. Somehow that was going to have to be enough.