Author's Note:

Poor Maggie broke her television set and as a result is cursed. She must go through one movie a night for seven nights. This is the third. Before this she's gone through Princess Bride and Pirates of the Caribbean. You don't really have to read them to understand the story. In fact while in the dream Maggie doesn't technically know it's a dream so it won't make a difference what happened before.

If you did read the other ones thank you very much and I'm glad you've followed the story here.

Previously:

Philo Farnsworth appeared in front of me.

"Nooooooooo!" I screamed as everyone else disappeared.

"Sorry," he said, not looking very sorry at all, "but it's time for your next movie."

"Oh joy," I sighed.

"I knew you'd be pleased," he smiled.

"I hate you."

"I know."

"I have a question. How come in Princess Bride I knew how to fight and sail and in Pirates of the Caribbean I couldn't do anything?"

"It's simple," he answered, "in Pirates of the Caribbean you were just a maid. In Princess Bride you were a sailor who could fight. You'll be able to fight this time to."

"Where am I going?"

"You're going to Troy. As a soldier."

"Oh my god," I gasped feeling my knees go weak, "you have to be kidding."

"One," he answered, "I never kid, and two, it's Zeus or another god there. There's more then one." I looked down and saw that I was wearing the uniform of a soldier. "You've gotten through the last two movies too easily. Living through the movie is supposed to be a challenge."

"I don't think women were soldiers in ancient Greece."

"They weren't but this is a dream so anything can happen."

Chapter #1:

I woke up with a start and looked around. For a second I couldn't remember where I was. Then it all came back to me. Achilles had put me on guard duty while he and his younger cousin practiced their sword fighting.

Looking around for what had woken me up I could see a group of men on horseback riding up.

Achilles was going to kill me for falling asleep and not noticing that people were approaching.

Just then Achilles and his cousin came over to me, still fighting as they came.

"I swear I was just about to come warn you," I told him as he grabbed one of his spears.

"Sure you were," he said in a surprisingly calm voice as he threw the spear. If I hadn't been laying down on the ground it would have gone right through my head!

It occurred to me that for once my laziness had paid off in my favor.

"Be careful, you nearly hit me with a spear!" I cried standing up and quickly standing behind a column in case he decided to throw another spear.

"If I'd wanted to hit you I would have," Achilles informed me in a smug voice (rubbing in the fact that he was way better with a spear then me), "this time I wasn't trying to hit you." I looked over at the guy who the spear would have hit if a tree hadn't blocking him.

"What did he ever do to you?" I asked.

"He's a good friend," he answered. We watched as the man pulled the spear out of the tree.

"I'd hate to see how you greet enemies," I remarked, "you could have killed him with that spear."

"He wasn't aiming for his friend," Patroclus informed me haughtily.

"He could have missed," I argued, "then he would be minus one friend." I privately thought that since Achilles had so few friends it would make the loss all the more serious.

"Achilles never misses!"

"Enough chatter," the warrior in question said to us, "go back to guarding Maggie. Or at least pretending to guard." Insulted I stalked away as I heard the man coming up.

"Your reputation for hospitality is fast becoming legend," the man quipped as he approached.

It was a while later that Patroclus came over to me. He sat down on the ground and shook me awake.

"I wasn't sleeping," I told him in what I hoped was an off-hand voice.

"Of course you weren't," he smiled then a second later he frowned looking serious.

"Maggie," he said, "we're going to war."

I think that's when I fainted. Patroclus claimed I fell asleep, but I definitely fainted.