Disclaimer: Uh...no. Naw. I don't own anything, I don't own anything, I DON'T OWN A SINGLE FREAKIN' THING!

Author's Note: I just thought of this in class. X3

The Vocaloid's Rant

Miku Hatsune stood in front of a camera, rubbing her eye sleepily. "Is it on?" she asks the cameraman, who is actually Rin Kagamine, her friend/rival. Rin nods, and Miku sits down on the large leather chair beside her. She lets out a sigh, and picks up the single piece of paper on the table in front of her. "Okay, so...story and pairings...blah blah blah..." Miku's teal eyes widened at one sentence in the paper.

"WHAT!" she shrieks, standing up quickly, almsot knocking over the chair and table. Rin flinches, making the camera angle point away from Miku for a few seconds before the orange lover recovered. "Okay, this has crossed the freaking line!"

Rin rolls her eyes, which is unseen by the camera. "Hey, Miku, you gonna start that rant anytime soon? We got an hour before the camera runs out of film." she says, and Miku takes a deep breath.

"Whatever," the diva says, sitting back down, fixing her skirt along the way. "So, I shall rant about the strange pairings around, my personalities in stories, and ecchi and hentai pictures of me." she explains, and clears her throat.

"First of all, the ecchi thing is sort of okay. Panty shots, me posing...sexually, blushing while in those poses, and wearing a skimpy outfit kinda like my Append," Miku glares at the Miku Append standing by the exit, and the Append scuttles away. "I don't really approve of it, but it's not illegal, so I'll let that one slide..." Miku's gaze followed the pink butterfly flying through the little stage, and then she tries to swat at it with a leek she pulled out of nowhere. She snaps her attention back at the camera, and then she speaks again. "Next, the hentai pictures are a BIG no-no."

Rin stifles a laugh, tilting the camera a bit. "Rin, if you're gonna laugh, do it another time." Miku tells her, and she sighs. "Seriously? I would NEVER be tied up and have a fake you-know-what inside of my private areas while some kind of bead thing is inserted in my...yeah, you get the point. Bondage, fake you-know-what, gagball, blindfold, now who in the world drew that? And some dude doing..." Miku stands up and starts pelvic thrusting a bit to show an example while sounds of Rin slightly laughing is heard. "...that to my behind. That is a HUGE- RIN, STOP LAUGHING! THIS IS SERIOUS!" Miku shouts at the girl, throwing a pillow and missing terribly.

"Haha, okay! Okay! I'm sorry..." Rin says to Miku, and she still laughs a bit. Miku sighs for the umpteenth time that hour, and sits back down. She rubs her head, receiving a headache.

"Then...personalities. Okay, I am NOT a self-centered person, nor am I a lovey-dovey girl who likes ponies or whatever." Miku makes a face, and Rin stifles yet another laugh. "That's just stupid. I think everybody should be treated equally, and I put others before me." Miku says, and tries to flatten a few strands of her hair that stood up a bit.

"And last but not least...pairings." Miku shivers at the thought. "First, I will NEVER, EVER like Gakupo. He's a pedophile and a pervert. Second, I don't like Luka in that way. She's like a big sister to me, or rather, a little sister who develops faster. Third, Len is more of a little brother to me. Anytime he asks for help, I'll help him since I'm like his big sister. Fourth, I don't like Kaito-nii like that. He's too old, and he's weird. And he's like a big brother to me and everybody else. Fifth, I don't like Rin like that. She's a friend/rival/little sister to me, and it would be kinda awkward with Len if he walks in on us, you know...eating each other's faces. The only time we kissed is when Meiko-nee got drunk and pushed us together. Things took a long time to get back to normal." Miku sighed once more. "Sixth, I don't like Gumi in that way, but she's pretty cool. Even if she's a little bit airheaded and...odd." Miku rolled her eyes, and then a dark look came on her face.

"And I don't like people who pair me with theirselves." Miku's innocent look came back on again. "But if they really like me, then it's okay...but it would be kinda weird since I don't really know them...oh well. Everybody has their own imagination limits~" Miku chirped, swaying her head back and forth with a tune in her mind.

"Alright. Is that all?" Miku asked Rin, and from the looks of it, Rin had nodded. "Great. I want a leek sandwich. I'm getting hungry." Miku stood up, bowed down to the camera, and left. Before she left the camera's view, she smacked a girl with dark brown hair and golden highlights. "Don't pair me up with Rin, pervert!" she shouted at her, and she stomped away. The girl looked at the camera, and grinned nervously.

"OtakuGirl347 here..." she mumbled, looking everywhere with her dark brown eyes and rubbing her sore head, waving a bit and then scurrying away.

A small silence passed before the camera view fell down and Rin was laughing loudly, hitting the floor with her fists. "H-Hentai pictures are a no-no...! Ahaha! Sh-She was pelvic thrusting...! Omigod! I'm gonna die...! Haha! And who the hell likes ponies anymore!" Rin shouted, rolling so much that she was a bit in the camera's view, her bow fluttering furiously. "Ah...haha..." Rin laughed a bit while picking up the camera. She flashed a big grin with a peace sign before shutting the camera off.

Author's Note: ...I don't even know. And I'm sorry if I hurt anyone's feelings. I was bored and I needed something to do. Requests for a rant are welcome. Bye bye...*Runs away in fear of being attacked*