A/N: I know I haven't updated the Twilight Fic. I've been so busy it's insane. But this stupid oneshot got stuck in my head and I wanted to write it. If anyone wants to attempt to do a semi-love triangle of !uninterested!Bruce/!uninterested!Lois/Jealous!Superman I'd love to read it.
Two Day Walk of Shame
He would have held his tongue had it not been for the second day "walk of shame" outfit Lois walked in with.
"Hey there Kansas. Is there coffee on the pot? I didn't have the chance to catch any this morning."
The wrinkles in her lavender power suit's blazer were deep set. Her shirt mussed. Her sleek dark hair not completely brushed. You didn't need x-ray vision to see that Lois was wearing the same clothing she had worn the day before when she'd run off for coffee billionaire Bruce Wayne in Gotham City.
Clark cleared his throat as he walked over to the coffee pot. "I'm afraid to say it's stale."
-"When isn't it?" her demeanor was dry but cheerful.
"Jimmy? I'm not much of a photography wiz so if you could upload these on my computer," she tossed the red head her digital camera-case and paused to flash a mega watt smile.
Jimmy fumbled at Lois's smile mouth slightly agape.
"G-good night last night?"
"Fabulous! Though I didn't sleep very much,"-Clark did something he never did: he choked on his coffee. Her small but forceful hands were immediately on his back, thumping air into him.
"Jesus Kent! Breath!"
She slept with him. She really slept with Bruce last night.
His head was spinning with the endless possibilities of what had transpired. Bruce Wayne and Lois did know each other. Though he wasn't sure of where they had cultivated their easy going known-you-forever attitude.
When he had asked Bruce as Superman, the man had simply answered, "We know a few of each other's secrets."
When he had asked Lois if she wanted him to tag along, she'd played it off overly causal.
"We're just meeting for a coffee. Nothing big really. If anything crops about a story you'll the first one I'd call," she'd paused to punch his shoulder playfully. "I'm a big girl Kent. I'll be fine."
Something about her jubilant attitude set him on edge the rest of the day. Though, if he had been honest with himself, he would have admitted that both Superman and Clark Kent didn't sleep very well the night before.
Which is how is explained his clipped words at Batman later that night.
"Gotham is a good hundred and fifty miles from here. What are you doing in my neck of the woods?"
He didn't have to turn to know that Batman was behind him.
"Some of my leads on the hotel robbery in Gotham led me here." Superman turned in time to see the trademark playboy smirk, "Plus, I had a date."
-"With who?" Without though, the words had pushed their way out of his lips.
Through the cowl Superman could see the raised eyebrow the thinly veiled amusement touching the corners of Bruce's lips.
"When have you ever been interested in my love life Clark?"
The question brought Clark sharply back to reality. Superman and Batman were on a hotel rooftop. He was patrolling the city. Not interrogating a criminal.
"I'm not. Interested I mean."
Batman made a sound in the back of his throat that could have been a low laugh.
"You're a bad liar Clark. If you're so interested in what happened between Lois Lane and I the other night you should ask her. Not me."
Superman stepped forward to disagree but a police siren fifty miles away distracted him. Batman caught the meaning of his blank expression.
"Trouble?"
"Always."
"I'll tag along. Just in case."
Superman couldn't help but roll his eyes.
"What about your date?" the question fell on deaf ears. Batman was already repelling to the other building.
The black mini dress she was wearing didn't keep out the wind. But he had said to dress like they were on a date and this was one of the few "date worthy" dresses she owned.
"You know we could have just done this at your house like we did the other day," her tone was dry as she watched him slide out of his car at the entrance of the restaurant.
-"You should have told me. I could have had Alfred pick you up."
She shrugged. "I have a car. Tell me again why I'm here with you instead of at home?"
Bruce chuckled as he approached her. Took her hand in his to kiss her fingertips.
"This is more discreet and we both know it. Smile."
The ritzy restaurant in downtown Metropolis was quiet and heavily romantic. Waiters setting your napkin in your lap. Too many utensils to count. Lois sighed. After a long day like she had in her stale clothes, she had been looking forward to a carton of Chinese.
"I have some pictures you'd be interested in," she pushed a folder towards him across the table that she had materialized from her briefcase.
His playboy façade flickered as he flipped through glossy photo after photo of the CEO of Wayne Hotels using the passkey with white gloves.
"It's concrete proof that I dug up that night. I held off on putting in the Daily Planet because I figured you'd want first crack at the slime." Picking apart escargo with the tiny fork she sighed.
"I'm assuming our "date" is being cut short then?" Her tone wasn't harsh or sad. Just matter of fact.
"I'm sorry."
The reporter snorted. "No, you're not. Go get some bad guys. I'll get "Garson" here to pack up the rest. Thank you for taking me here though. It's a nice date spot. And I doubt I'll be coming here anytime soon otherwise."
Bruce paused in folding his napkin to leave.
"You're a beautiful woman, Lois. Something I think we both know."
Her lavender eyes flashed flirtaously, her hand pausing at the snails to rest under her chin.
"That's sweet of you to say, Bruce. But we both know that's not the problem."
"You going to ask him then?"
A slight flush lit across her features.
"I know that the guys in the Daily Planet think I'm a brew-ha crazy feminist but I draw the line in asking a man out."
Bruce laughed. "No one is accusing you of being easy Lane. Let me walk you to your car."
-"Not like I have a choice with you."
They walked in relative silence save the clicking of her heels until she turned to him once at her car, a puzzled almost hurt expression on her face.
"Bruce?"
"Hmmm?"
"Why wouldn't he ask me out?"
Bruce exhaled an exasperated breath,"If he's the man I'm thinking of, I'd say he's shy. And clueless."
Bruce turned to face a wall of the parking garage. "Mild mannered types often are so caught up in the problems of others they rarely self examine."
Lois groaned. "Don't say that so loud. Mild mannered. God, he's always calling himself that. As if I'm too dumb to see that he has a temper that is under lock and key."
Bruce's laugh rang out loud enough to echo. Coughing into his sleeve to cover his laughter he bent to press a kiss to her cheek and still smiling, he opened her car door.
"You're very astute Lois. Batman is lucky there aren't many reporters like you in Gotham. I wouldn't worry about the guy though. I'm sure Clark will catch on soon."
-"I thought we agreed you'd keep that under wraps!" Her tone was embarrassed if bit grumbling.
"I will. Don't worry. A deal's a deal. I won't tell a soul that doesn't already know." His smirk was little wicked as he shut her car door.
They both watched her drive away.
"I'll assume you won't be tailing my dates anymore Clark."
The presence was gone just as soon as it had come but Bruce Wayne was certain that Lois would get that real date real soon in the future.