This story nagged me ^~^ and it's hard to ignore it. Again, i don't have anything against other pairings. So, don't think that i do. This is in Sasori's POV. and sorry for the wrong spellings or wrong grammar here ^~^
Warning: This is slightly or is AU.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto
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Always tell the truth...
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That's what my mother told me back when i was still a child. And back then, it never occured to me that telling the truth could be so difficult. It's become difficult because of her. I always hated her.
She is a member of the Akatsuki, one that has already been a member even before me. She dosen't usually appear, if you exclude meetings. It dosen't count, because we merely use holograms and i could never see her. Not that i'd want to. Really.
We don't really know each other, to her i'm just another member of the Akatsuki. And to me, maybe she is also. But i know those are all lies. I've become a great liar over the years. Lying has become easy for me. Another lie.
It was a habbit now. I excuse myself from missions that i don't find interesting because I have puppets that needed 'repair'. These missions never really interest me. I always find them beneath me, they are uninteresting and incompetent. I've stayed... because i needed body parts for my puppets. What a pathetic lie.
Alright, i lied. I stay because of her, you know that already. I still can'tstopsaying it. Did it sound easy to say ? Then you don't know how to listen. I stay and at some point i try to imitate her i try to copy her beauty and mold it into one of my puppets. To make her eternal. All i have to do is make an exact replica of her and then i leave. Just like that. More lies.
No, it's not that simple. A fake imitaion cannot be compared to the original. It will only be second best. I never settle for second best. And that is a simple fact. Now it's different. If possible, I would like to settle for second best now. If possible.
I know that i want the real thing. My art would never capture her completely. And it never will. I can say that i've accepted that, since i don't make cheap imitations anymore. But that would be a lie.
You can say that this is an obsession of mine. It has... grown over the years i've been here. I half-expected it to lessen, things didn't go accordinly. They never do. There is always an interfearrance in ones plans. Things never go the way anyone wants them to.
They say that the eyes reflect ones soul and intentions. And if you look closely at mine, although they were modified, they would reveal a lot about my intentions. I reside within Hiruko, therfore my eyes cannot be read. I can read the other's, they are not very hard to tell, still it takes time and there just isn't time anymore. Her eyes reflect mine in more ways than we both would like to aknowledge. I hate her eyes, and i hate myself for lying.
I shouldn't talk of her this way. It's because she is special. She is god's angel. And here, Leader-sama or should i say Pein -we are never allowed to call him that, except, well, for her, He won't hear me-, is god. She is always with him, always in his shadow. Never complaining, never speaking unless neccesary. She shows no emotion, and follows orders given by Pein and Pein only. She follows him and only him.
The very reason for this is something that i will never know. That is only between Pein and her. She is always with him, he never let's her out of his sight. She is his and for that very reason she is off-limits to us. We are not to touch her, or to get emitionally involved, were not even allowed to look at her for a very long time. The other's don't care, why should i ? It's because i'm lying right now.
It's hard not to notice the glances she's given me every once in a while. They always reflect sadness, and i my heart always tightens every time. I still have a heart, i won't live without it, even if i don't want it. Pein never notices, or if he did, it would be best to pretend not to aknowledge it. Even god's can lie. Still, it's not allowed to get emotionally involved. It's forbidden.
Too late, i'm already emotionally involved. That's why i always lie. She preffers it that way. We live in pretense. Like me, she also lies. Angel's lie too. We both lie to ourselves. We both refuse to aknowledge the fact that were already emotionally involved. No one's perfect. Everyone lies. Everyone.
I guess that i'm waiting for something to happen. That maybe she'll die from a mission, maybe then, i'll make her into my art like what i have made myself into. She'll be eternal, she'll be even more beautiful and she'll be mine. My angel. Sounds selfish ? I know, i don't care. But that will never happen, it's a lie, that's why i preffer to lies. Because there is no truth in them.
Sasori, Why do you lie ?
I gave her a wryly look.
Why do you let me then, Konan ?
She leaves without another word. We both know the answer.
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... because the truth will set you free.
I will never be free.
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I now, finally got this done with ^~^ don't think i'm neglecting my other fics because of this. It's just like i said, this nagged me, like the other one. And i'll be updating in, well, maybe sooner or later ^~^
Anyway, Review ^~^
