Corruption of Senshi

I've been having disturbing dreams lately. When it starts I'm in a room that I can't leave. It's a nice room, comfortable and MINE in a way I can't properly put into words, but I can't LEAVE.

There's a strange sword in my hands. The blade is only a little over two feet long. The metal is an ugly dull black and there's writing on it. The words are in a strange language that is all scratches and angles as if made by claws. Where the grip should be there is only a hand sized indentation in the blade. I'm not sure how but I know this blade will never harm me. It even more so than the room is Mine.

I am distracted from my examination of my blade by a soft whimper. I look to the side and see a demon chained to the wall. She's crying softly her arms and legs stretched painfully apart. Her clothes have long since been destroyed. The wall is bloody around her shoulders where her wings have been cut off and pinned to the wall.

I grip my sword as I walk over to stroke her tear streaked face, and giggle a bit at her fearful squeak. She is so lovely and the noises she makes beautiful. I kiss her gently at first than harder as I shove my sword through her stomach and into the wall. I close my eyes as I swallow her scream.

I release my sword so I can stroke a more intimate place but stop when I hear a horrified voice "Daughter is it not enough that you have maimed her. Must you violate her as well?"

"Of course I don't, but listen," I say then grip and lightly twist my sword. The scream caused Mother to wince. "Is that not the most beautiful sound you have ever heard. She wants me so badly. How can I resist such a plea?"

"I have something I must tell you," she said with a worried look.

I yank out my sword and begin to decorate my captive. Carving designs into her skin. "What?"

Mother looked more nervous than usual as she told me "It's about your sister."

I froze. Had something happened while I was locked away in here unable to protect her? Was she hurt? If she was I would paint my room with the offenders blood. Their family would be given femlan* and given to the border patrols to raise moral.

"She is not hurt," Mother told me sensing the trail of my thoughts. " She is getting married to the Terran Prince."

My world broke. "But." I fell to my knees. "But why him. I'm the one who protects her. I found the assassins. I took her into my bed so she would be harder to harm. I was her first kiss. I studied magic and created a spell so I could father a child and give her an heir. I'm the one she should be wedding not that … that MEAT PUPPET! How could you let this happen."

As my eyes started to tear up I looked at Mother. She had that look on her face again. That same horrified look she always gave me, like their was something wrong with me. I HATED that look. Every time she looked at me like that she ran out of the room and sealed me in with both mundane locks and anti-magic fields. This time was no different.

For the first time since I chained her to the wall my captive spoke. "I'm sorry for your loss." She pitied me. I could see it in her eyes and hear it in her voice. How dare she pity me. ME! I picked up my sword and stabbed her. … Then I did it again. Then I just stabbed and slashed until there was nothing left but an unrecognisable pile of chunks of bloody meat.

As I lay there in the remains I fell into despair. My beloved was going to marry someone else, and worse it was that damned Terran. I started crying.

The dream ends there. I always wake up crying. I thought I was in love before. That was nothing like this. I reach for her in the night sometimes. When she's not there it's like my heart is caught in a vise.

Oh God It Hurts.

*Femlan is an illegal fertility drug designed to correct whatever may be preventing a woman from conceiving. Unfortunately while it does do what it is designed to do it also severely retards cognitive function and causes submissive behaviour. When ingested by men it also causes breasts to develop. Because of these factors it is used to rapidly break slaves. It can only be created by mid to high level magic users and as such is ineffective on them.