A/N: Since Brooklyn Nine-Nine doesn't seem to have any Vampire stories, here's this.

Not entirely happy with it, little rushed and stilted at points, but I'm stuck on any ideas to make it better, and I wanted to throw my hat into the B99 ring with something a little unique.

Also, the characters may be somewhat OOC, I binge watched the entire show in about a week, so I probably don't have the characters down great, but I tried.

Pretty loose version of vampires — I was going after humor, not realisticness — but includes ideas from Supernatural and a couple HP stories listed in the closing notes.

Monday morning, Detectives Peralta and Santiago stepped off the elevator into the familiar bullpen, that seemed so much brighter than it had the last time they were there. They made their way over to their joined desks, Amy dropping a binder on her desk, before collapsing into her chair with significantly less grace than she normally did.

As soon as they had discovered what had happened to them, she had of course made a binder with everything they could possibly need to know, along with the best ways to keep the office, and the NYPD especially, from discovering what they now were.

It had been a simple Friday night stakeout when they'd been attacked, which had fortunately given them the entire weekend to begin to get some familiarity with their new conditions, and get the most obvious tells over with before they had to come back to work. They'd taken out a few criminals each on the streets Saturday and Sunday nights, and were pretty confident that they could just feed off each other from now on. Jake had suggested that they take a few more days off before returning to work, but between the office already being down a man with Captain Holt being out of town for the week, and the general suspiciousness of both halves of Peraltiago calling in sick at the same time, Amy had refused.

"Better make sure no one sees that," Jake said, pointing at the binder.

"Title of my sex tape," mumbled Amy as she locked the binder in one of her desk drawers, causing Jake to chuckle lightly.

At that moment the elevator doors dinged open again, and a leather clad Rosa Diaz walked in, giving Jake and Amy a tight nod before sitting down at her own desk, ignoring them. As long as she'd known Jake, from their very first day in the academy, starting time had always been more of a suggestion than a rule to him; but ever since he'd moved in with Santiago, who had been late to work as many times as you could count on one finger, she had been making him get to work at the same time as she did. Something about literally shoving him out of the bed and onto the floor a few times.

"Hi Rosa!" said Amy cheerfully, earning her Rosa's friendly-greeting scowl.

Amy had only been working, and Jake had only been taking an online quiz about what type of apple he was for a few minutes, when everyone else started making their way in.

"Ooh, is today sunglasses day?" exclaimed Boyle in his normal joviality as soon as he walked in and saw Jake and Amy both wearing sunglasses, immediately rummaging through his desk and pulling out his Matrix sunglasses, and putting them on.

He had just barely sat down when Terry called them all into the briefing room for the morning briefing, and leaping up, immediately tripped over his trash can.

"Okay there buddy?" asked Jake, helping his friend up.

Being that close to his friend, Jake could smell the blood pulsing through Boyle's veins, and quickly grabbed a "juice" box out of his desk before following everyone into the briefing room. Despite their shades, general overdressedness for the middle of summer, and slightly paler skin than before the weekend, no one in briefing seemed to notice anything different about them, much to Amy's great relief.

Truth was, no one had thought anything was off with Peraltiago, except Rosa, who could feel something tugging at the back of her mind, but couldn't quite place it. It wasn't until she was walking back to her desk that she realized what had been bothering her ever since she'd walked in that morning; Detective Santiago was wearing sunglasses, something she'd never seen the girl do before, and inside the building at that. So was Jake, but him being weird was more normal than him being normal, so that didn't really say much.

But as for Santiago, she was apparently either nursing a major hangover, or had lost another stupid bet to Jake. But before she could think about it too much, Terry came over with a case for her and the Peraltiagos, and she pushed her thoughts to the back of her mind.

Their perp had just disappeared into an abandoned warehouse building.

Guns out, Rosa, Jake, and Amy crept up to the building, throwing open the door and quickly clearing the hallway it opened into. Closing the door softly behind them, Rosa pulled out her flashlight, slightly brightening a narrow beam in the nearly dark hall. Turning to her two partners, she expected them to have pulled out their own flashlights as well, but they'd merely taken off their sunglasses, the first time she'd seen them do so all day.

Signaling for them to each take separate directions when they reached the end of the hallway and it opened up into the main warehouse, Rosa watched briefly as Jake and Santiago disappeared into the dark, apparently unperturbed by the distinct lack of light in the building. Shaking her head, she focused on trying to find their perp.

Rosa had been creeping down the rows of abandoned shelving for several minutes when she heard the distinctive sound of someone being slammed up against some of those said shelvings, just a few rows away. She quickly found her way to the source of the noise, where the beam of her flashlight fell on Jake, standing with his gun trained on their perp, who Santiago had pinned to the floor; all in the extremely dim lighting that tried to filter in through the exceedingly grimy windows set high in the walls of the building, plus the small light that now fell onto the scene from Rosa's own flashlight. And once Santiago had her handcuffs on the guy, Jake pulled his sunglasses back out and put them on before turning to look at Rosa.

"We got him," he said cheerfully.

Rosa merely nodded and gave a curt, "Good job," lost in her own thoughts.

Unless Jake had gotten his hands on some kind of prototype night vision contact lenses, there was definitely something going on. And though no one in the office knew it, she didn't just wear all-black and kick ass because she enjoyed it; although she definitely did enjoy it.

Back at the office, Rosa was just finishing up her report on the takedown when she glanced into the break room. Jake and Santiago were standing extremely close, which was nothing unusual since they'd gotten together, stealing kisses any chance they got; but this time, they weren't kissing. If Rosa had to describe it to anyone asking, she'd say Santiago had her nose buried into Jake's neck, sniffing him; certainly not their normal amorousness at the office.

Deciding to test a theory, Rosa got up and walked towards the break room, noting through the window the moment they could sense she was coming and suddenly broke apart, so that by the time she actually walked into the room, they were standing well apart, Jake pouring a cup of coffee, as Santiago looked over the folder she held in her hand, undoubtedly Jake's paperwork that she was checking for errors and the inevitable lack of cascading, color-coded tabs.

Rosa grabbed the coffee pot after Jake and poured herself a cup of coffee, before walking back out to her desk, a slight smirk on her face. She watched surreptitiously as Jake and Santiago returned to their desks separately, including Jake sipping a cup of coffee he didn't seem to be enjoying as much as he normally did.

"Think anyone noticed anything?" Amy asked worriedly as soon as they got into her car at the end of the day, headed home.

"Seriously, Ames? I've built up a lifelong reputation of being anything but normal; if anyone noticed anything odd, they'll just think its me being me," replied Jake, completely unconcerned.

"But what about me?" exclaimed Amy, agitated that Jake wasn't taking this seriously. "I never do anything out of the ordinary!"

"They'll just think some of my charm is finally rubbing off on you, or you lost a bet, or something. Don't worry about it, babe," said Jake calmingly, before adding after a short pause, "Although…Rosa might have noticed something; when we went into that building this afternoon, neither of us even thought about pulling out flashlights, since we can see in the dark and didn't need them, but Rosa did seem to be giving us a stranger than normal look when she caught up to us after you took the perp down. And it's probably nothing, but she did choose to come into the break room exactly when you were breathing all over my neck."

"I was hungry," grumbled Amy. "I thought I was ready to go a full workday without eating, but apparently I was wrong. And I don't have a reputation of drinking out of juice boxes to hide blood in."

"You did make a full sub-section in your binder on feeding at work," replied Jake. "Maybe we should try one of them tomorrow. We've always used the evidence room for sneaking in kisses, and ever since we figured out where the cameras can't see us, for making out when things get a little too boring in the office."

"This is a little more than just making out," said Amy, really wishing Jake would take this more seriously. Not that anyone would actually believe that they were vampires, but if anyone ever figured out that there was something wrong with them, they would unquestionably lose their jobs.

"Did Amy Santiago just use the word 'just' in the same sentence as 'making out in a police precinct'?" exclaimed Jake, way too excited for any reasonable adult.

Not that Jake could ever be called reasonable, or even adult for that matter, Amy quickly reminded herself, before eloquently responding to his childishness like any actually reasonable adult would.

"Shut up."

~B99~

Jake had barely shut their apartment door behind them when Amy quite literally attached herself to his neck, and he stumbled backwards into said door to stay upright. Jake could feel his blood flowing out of his veins into her fangs as she feasted on him. He was just beginning to feel slightly light-headed when Amy finally let him go, taking a few steps backwards.

"You're really going to have to start feeding during the day," he said as he swayed slightly walking over to one of the chairs at their dining room table. "I can't take you drinking that much at one time every night."

Instantly sensing his discomfort, Amy was immediately by his side apologizing. "I'm so, so sorry. I didn't mean — Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, I'm fine," he reassured her, running his hand gently through her hair. "Just give me a minute to recover."

Without a word, Amy sat herself down in his lap, brushing her hair over her shoulder, and tilting her head so that her neck was completely exposed, before looking down at him expectantly. She also casually flicked open the top button of her blouse, although that admittedly had less to do with making her neck more easily available for him.

Jake leaned forward, as if he was going to obey her silent command to feed on her blood to rebuild his strength, but instead of biting her he began peppering kisses along her exposed shoulder and neck, until he reached her pulse point. He sucked on it gently for a few seconds, Amy letting out something between a sigh and a moan, before suddenly biting down hard with fangs she'd been too distracted to realize he'd grown out. Amy let out a loud yelp, slapping him hard on the back. Jake merely chuckled into her neck as he continued drinking from her.

After a few seconds, Jake leaned back grinning, blood dripping grotesquely from his still exposed fangs.

"I can't believe you," she glared at him, before adding, "And that's just disgusting."

"Then why don't you clean it up," replied Jake cheekily with a smug grin.

So Amy did the only thing proven to effectively wipe the smugness off his face, and kissed him hard, running her tongue across his fangs and around every corner of his mouth, cleaning up every last drop of her blood, relishing in the taste of herself on his mouth. Finally content that she'd gotten it all, she broke the kiss and leaned back, surveying her work. Jake withdrew his fangs, before leaning forwards to press a soft kiss against her lips.

His innocent kisses soon drifted from her lips, across her cheek, and down her neck to the spot where he'd bitten her, growing less innocent as they continued.

"You'd better not bite me again, or I will kill you," mewed Amy with substantially less threat in her voice than she would have liked, as he began sucking on her pulse point again.

But Jake had no intentions of using his fangs on her this time, and started kissing down her collar bone, down the exposed skin of the front of her chest, aided in his efforts by the extra button she'd undone earlier, along with all the additional buttons his fingers were currently deftly undoing.

When Jake and Amy walked off the elevator at work the next morning, the first thing they noticed was that Rosa was already at her desk, working on her computer. The second thing they noticed was that she had a large wooden stake lying in the middle of her desk, holding down a case file.

"Hey guys," Rosa said as the two of them walked over to their conjoined desks, acknowledging them with a slight flick of her head, before returning her attention to her computer.

Jake and Amy both returned greetings, before heading into the break room under the pretense of getting their morning coffee.

"She knows." said Amy as soon as the door was shut behind them and they were assured of some privacy.

"Maybe not. I mean, it is Rosa; she could have a wooden stake on her desk for lots of reasons," replied Jake as casually as he could, but Amy could tell even he was't believing himself anymore. "And even if she does somehow know we're vampires from only one day, she clearly doesn't know anything about them if she thinks a stake in the heart will actually work."

"Or she's just toying with us, like a cat before it goes in for the kill," said Amy darkly, glaring out the glass towards their fellow detective's desk.

"Before you get too worked up, babe, let's just see what happens," replied Jake soothingly, rubbing his hands up and down Amy's arms. "Now we should get back out to our desks before she really can suspect something's going on."

The rest of the morning passed as smoothly as it ever did at the Nine-Nine, and with no new cases to take them out on the streets, all three of them were at their desks all morning digging further into the case they had.

Boyle had fortunately abandoned his attempts to wear his sunglasses indoors after tripping over his trash can on the way to the briefing room, tripping over a chair in break room, and nearly running into several people at different times during the previous day, and no one else seemed inclined to comment on the fact that Jake and Amy were both still wearing theirs. In fact, other than Rosa, no one in the office seemed to suspect that there was anything different about the couple.

~B99~

Mid-afternoon, Jake quietly closed the door to the evidence room behind him. Rounding the corner of the shelves, he spotted Amy hiding silently in the shadows, rearranging misplaced boxes. Even when she was simply waiting on him inside the evidence room for a couple minutes so that they wouldn't be seen entering the evidence room together, she still couldn't help but organize.

"We're in the clear," he said, dipping in for a light kiss.

"All right, let's just get this over with," Amy replied, lightly pushing Jake off her lips, before he forgot what they were really supposed to be doing and started trying to make out with her. Despite the fact she considered drinking in the precinct to be a bigger deal than making out, she still wasn't about to just start making out with him at work without really good reason.

Jake hurriedly loosened his tie and undid the top few buttons of his shirt, allowing Amy to push his shirt collar away from his neck. She wasted no time in sinking her fangs into his neck, enjoying the bitter, metallic taste. She soon pulled back, her pristine fangs retracting into her gums, the pinprick marks on Jake's neck healing over as she watched.

"You can drink more than that, you know," said Jake as he straightened up his shirt.

"I'm fine," replied Amy sharply, pulling the collar of her own shirt down. "Just hurry up before someone comes in here."

Jake had only been drinking for a few seconds when there was a loud bang as the evidence room door noisily burst open, followed by Rosa loudly muttering to herself about the box she was looking for. Amy would have leapt back several feet at the sudden cacophony, which wouldn't have been the smartest idea with a pair of fangs stuck in her neck, but luckily Jake grabbed her waist before her body could make any actual physical movement, keeping her still so he could withdraw his fangs.

As soon as his fangs were out of her, Amy quickly straightened up her shirt, before straightening it again, and had started to straighten it a third time when Jake grabbed her hands and mouthed, "You look fine." He then gently nudged her down the row in one direction, as he headed in the opposite direction.

"Here's that folder I was looking for," he said loudly as he rounded the corner to where Rosa was standing over her own open box. "Oh, Rosa! Didn't realize you there."

"Just needed to check on a couple details," Rosa replied brusquely, shutting the folder she had open as soon as she saw him. Then she shoved the folder back into the box before throwing it onto the nearest shelf, and walking out of the evidence room.

Once the door had shut behind her, Amy came around the corner, immediately grabbing the box Rosa had put back on the shelf, and carrying it over to the shelf it was supposed to be on.

"She knew we were in here."

"Maybe not," replied Jake, still not even convincing himself.

"That box contains fifty year old public intoxication records. What possible reason could she have for looking in there? And she didn't even try to pretend she was looking at it as soon as you acknowledged her presence," retorted Amy.

"Fine! So she knows! And that helps us how, exactly?" snapped Jake, his carefully maintained nonchalance finally breaking. He'd tried too hard to keep himself convinced that their secret was exactly that, that when he was finally proven wrong, he wasn't happy about it. "Anyway, she clearly wasn't actually trying to catch us, or she would have come in quietly. She was intentionally being loud, so she wouldn't catch us."

"So maybe she just wants us to know that she knows," mused Amy, walking back over to where Jake was still standing. "But if that's the case, why doesn't she just tell us?"

"Uh, because if she happened to be wrong, and just came up to us saying that she knew we were vampires, we would think she was completely crazy. And even as it is, we'd still obviously deny it if she did tell us she knew," replied Jake.

"Okay, okay," grumbled Amy, grouchily accepting that Detective Right-All-the-Time was once again right. "And I suppose your plan for handling her knowing is still to just wait and see what happens?"

"You're actually asking for my suggestions?" exclaimed Jake in mock surprise. "Amy Santiago created a binder that didn't include how to deal with someone finding out?"

"Shut up," retorted Amy, slapping him in the chest.

"But yeah, that is my plan. Wait for her to bring it up if she wants to. If she does try to hurt us, we have superhuman strength now, we should theoretically be able to overpower her. But it doesn't look to me like she wants to do that, it just looks like she wants us to know that she knows."

Amy sighed. Jake really was making sense, as rare of an occurrence as that was, and she didn't have any better ideas at the moment. She hated not being the one in control of every situation, but waiting for Rosa to make the moves did seem like their best option for the moment.

"Okay. We'll do it your way for now."

The following morning, Jake and Amy went out to question some more parties in connection to the perp they'd caught on Monday, and it wasn't until after lunch that they got back to the office. Hitchcock and Scully were deeply engrossed in their afternoon nap, Gina — the human form of the 100 emoji — was nowhere to be seen, and Terry and Boyle had met them on their own way out, heading to a robbery that'd just been reported.

Jake and Amy had just sat down at their desks when Jake glanced over at Rosa's desk, and saw that she'd lined the entire edge of her desk with salt shakers. To anyone else, it'd just look like Rosa was building a miniature wall to keep everyone away from her, but Jake knew better. A line of salt was another piece of vampire lore, and by this point he was almost certain Rosa was doing it intentionally.

He didn't know about other supernatural beings, assuming they probably did exist given that vampires clearly did, but he knew for a fact that vampires could walk right across salt lines; he and Amy had tested it, along with a number of other lores, a few days earlier after they'd been turned.

He stood up and walked over to her desk, planting himself in front of it.

"Okay, where'd you even get that many salt shakers from?" he asked. Picking up one of the shakers he added, "And I'm pretty sure this isn't how they're supposed to be used."

Rosa smirked. "I didn't want to get salt all over my desk. That'd be quite a mess to clean up for serving no actual purpose."

Okay, she definitely knew.

"All right, enough of this. We're talking. Come on," he demanded, nodding his head in the general direction of somewhere more private, though he didn't actually have a particular place in mind as he did it.

Rosa casually stood up and stepped around her desk, waiting for Jake to lead. Jake looked over at Amy and gave her a nod as well, even though the silent communication wasn't strictly necessary, as the only other detectives in the room were Hitchcock and Scully, still fast asleep at their desks.

Once Amy had stood up, Jake led them out of the bullpen, deciding on the evidence room as the best location for their secret meeting — most of the office's go-to location for conversations they didn't want overheard and activities they didn't want discovered.

As soon as the evidence room door was shut behind them, Jake turned on Rosa and said, "You know about us, don't you?"

"That you're vampires? Yeah, I do."

"I told you!" whispered Amy harshly to Jake.

In the close quarters it was obvious that Rosa could easily hear her, but the taller woman simply stood there, arms crossed in her typical stoic Rosa fashion.

"And you're just okay with two literal bloodsucking creatures working with you? I mean, you do know what vampires do, right?" Jake finally asked after a few seconds of silence that Rosa seemed to have no intention of breaking.

Rosa seemed to size them up for a second before letting out a sigh.

"I'd say this can't leave the room, but I'm fairly confident none of this will, since we'd all end up in institutions if it did."

She paused for a second, before continuing.

"I'm not just an NYPD detective; I also hunt down supernatural creatures, including vampires. You didn't think I was a badass just for the fun of it, did you?"

Jake kind of shrugged; he felt it more than reasonable to think she was a badass just because she liked it.

"Okay, fine, I'd be a badass even if I wasn't a hunter. But as well as you tried to hide it, it really wasn't hard for me to figure out what had happened to you guys, once I'd accepted the possibility. Sunglasses, more covering clothing than normal, slightly paler skin, ability to see in the dark, you getting far closer to him physically at work than you normally would due to a lack of eating, sensing when I was about to come into the room, lack of interest in food; all the signs were there. All I had to do then was have some vampire killing tool on my desk, and you two completely freaked out worrying that I knew, confirming my suspicions."

"But if you hunt us down — I assume that's what a hunter does — then why haven't you tried to kill us?" asked Jake, wondering how they were even still alive two days after Rosa had figured out what they were. Sure, he and Amy now had supernatural abilities, but whatever he'd said to Amy earlier about them easily being able to defeat Rosa, in a fight against a Rosa who knew what they were and actively hunted down creatures like themselves, he'd put his money on her every time.

"You're my friends. And you clearly aren't trying to go around terrorizing anyone, or kill or turn a bunch people. So I figured I'd give you guys the benefit of the doubt for the time being, and subtly let you know I was aware. Where it goes from here depends on how you handle being vampires," replied Rosa with a shrug. "It's my job to keep people safe, not simply kill every supernatural creature I can."

"I think you might have a better opinion of us than you should," said Amy quietly. "We're not really quite as innocent as you think."

"You've drained a few people dry. Big deal," replied Rosa emotionlessly. "You're new vampires, it's a given. But the only cases of mass blood loss I've heard recently were all convicted sex offenders, in bad parts of town, suspected of being back at their trades when they died. Nice job on the slits to the major arteries, by the way; makes it easy to put the large blood loss down to a completely normal COD."

"So you're not going to kill us now that you know we've killed people?"

asked Amy hesitantly.

"I can't fault you for surviving, and you took the best option you had. You took sex offenders off the street; permanently. Ones I presume were in the process of doing it again," replied Rosa. "And there were only a few, and you haven't seemed to have done it again since those few. So no, I'm not planning on killing you; for the moment."

Amy looked like she wanted to hug Rosa, but held herself back.

"Thank you. From both of us," said Jake sincerely. "And we haven't killed any more humans since then, and aren't going to. We've gotten in under control to the point where we can survive off just each other."

Rosa nodded her head, before letting out a sigh. "I can't believe I'm offering this, but you can drink some from me at work if you'd like. It's not healthy to just drink from the same person all the time. And if you split it up between morning and afternoon, I'll have plenty of blood left in me to be able to do my job."

"Aw, Rosa!" exclaimed Amy, unable to control herself any longer, and hugged the taller woman. "That's so kind of you!"

"Yeah, yeah, just don't tell anyone and ruin my reputation as a badass," grumbled Rosa, half-returning Amy's hug.

Before anything else could be said, the evidence room door opened, and Terry burst in.

"There you guys are! I've been looking all over for you. We've got a briefing in five," he said.

"Guess this discussion's over," said Rosa quietly to Jake and Amy as she gruffly pushed past them on her way out of the evidence room.

"And, that's the Rosa we all know and love," said Jake, before heading out of the room after her.

Thursday afternoon, Jake and Terry found themselves chasing the perp-they'd-caught-on-Monday's accomplice down an alleyway. Just as Jake cornered the guy, the guy pulled out a knife and slashed at Jake, leaving a severe gash across Jake's cheek.

Terry just barely had time to register the severity of the wound as he watched Jake stumble backwards, before the Ebony Falcon was running into the perp at full speed, flattening him to the ground. Once he'd gotten the guy into handcuffs and stood him up, he turned to Jake, quickly reminded of the gruesome injury the younger detective had received.

"Call the paramedics, you need to get that looked at," he said, nodding towards Jake's cheek, which now that he could look at it properly, didn't seem quite so bad as it had in the moment when he'd seen it happen, but still bad enough to need checked out.

"It's okay, it's not too bad. I'll survive until we've taken this guy back to the precinct for booking," Jake replied, waving off the Sergeant's concern. "It's not the worst I've ever had, and it's not bleeding anymore."

Terry shook his head, but knew that there was no way of convincing his overly stubborn detective, and so didn't say anything more. He'd make him get it looked at when they got back to the precinct.

But when they got there, Jake slipped off into the office as Terry booked the guy they'd just caught, before Terry could make him get it looked at; oh well, that was probably well enough, Amy would make him get it taken care of as soon as she saw it, and he'd listen to her much better than he did him, anyway.

As Jake walked up to his desk, Amy looked up and exclaimed, "Jake! What happened to you?"

At this, Rosa looked up from her own work, and saw the cut on his cheek; still pretty nasty, but much less than it originally must have been, she knew.

"I'll take care of it, Santiago," she said as she stood up, looking at Jake and nodding her head towards the evidence room.

Jake followed her down the hall and up the steps, into the thankfully empty evidence room. Heading straight for the cameraless spot of the room, she quickly pulled the collar of her shirt away from her neck. Jake just stood there, staring at her. Despite their discussion with Rosa the previous afternoon, he hadn't actually drank from Rosa yet, and he and Amy had been too busy with more pleasurable activities that night when they'd gotten home to discuss taking Rosa up on her offer. And while Jake thought Amy was going to agree to suck off their fellow detective, he still felt a little nervous about biting another girl without Amy's express permission.

"Drink. It'll accelerate the healing," Rosa said, breaking the silence and pulling Jake out of his thoughts.

Jake stepped forwards, before hesitantly lowering his mouth down to her neck, reluctantly breaking the skin.

It was nice to have human blood again, and not just vampire and animal blood (speaking of which, he should see if Mlepnos (with the silent "clay") was still selling horse blood — that would be worth trying, now that they were vampires), and though of course he'd never say this out loud to Rosa or Amy, Rosa had a nice, apple-ly smell about her.

When Jake unlatched from her neck and pulled back, he reached up and could feel the cut actively healing underneath his fingertips, almost completely gone.

"Thanks, Rosa," he said sincerely.

"Couldn't let you go walking around the precinct with your cheek split half open," she replied with a shrug. "Only I'm allowed to do that."

Jake chuckled, and they walked back out into the bullpen, where Amy was noticeably pleased that it no longer looked like Jake was in dire need of medical attention. She stood up and gave him a quick peck on the lips before returning to her work.

Jake had been only back at his desk for a couple minutes when Terry walked up, having finished booking their bad guy.

"Did you get that gash checked out, Peralta?" he asked in his no-nonsense boss voice that left no doubt as to who was in charge around there.

"What gash?" asked Jake innocently, spinning in his chair to look up at the Sarge.

Terry looked down at Jake's face in astonishment; not even a scar could be seen on Jake's boyishly handsome and way too smug face.

"What? How!?" he exclaimed in shock, staring at Jake with his mouth open.

"What, what?" asked Jake in return, doing his best to look confused at what the Sarge was talking about.

"You had a nasty cut on your cheek from the perp we just brought in! What happened to it? You saw it, right, Amy?" stammered Terry, unable to believe his eyes.

"No..." answered Amy slowly, looking at the Sarge with deep concern etched across her face — Jake was quite proud of how far she'd come in her acting skills since she'd become his detective partner. "He looked his normal devilishly handsome self when he walked in just a few minutes ago. A little sweaty, like he'd had to chase down a perp, but no injuries."

Terry just stared between the two of them for several seconds, completely flabbergasted by everything, before finally turning in defeat and walking back over to his desk, wondering what the hell happened. Fortunately he didn't look over at Rosa, who was barely holding it together watching the interaction.

Once he walked away, Jake and Amy looked at each other, it taking everything they had not to burst out in muffled laughter.

~B99~

"As funny as it was to flabbergast the Sarge, it's going to get us in real trouble one day, you know," said Amy seriously as they walked into their apartment that evening after work.

"You would rather I have a dangerous gash on my cheek?" joked Jake in mock astonished offense. As Amy simply rolled her eyes, he added, "It's not like I can just stop myself from healing, anyway."

"I know, I know, and in our line of work it's a great thing," Amy replied as she carefully put all her belongings away where they belonged, before moving to put all of Jake's belongings in their proper places from where he'd just dropped them on the couch. As odd as it might seem, she really didn't mind picking up after him; she really did enjoy putting away and organizing things, and was more than happy to put Jake's stuff away as well as her own. "But maybe you could still let it be checked out by a paramedic. And not drink any blood until we get home, so it doesn't heal miraculously fast."

"Yeah, about that…" he said slowly, leaning up against the kitchen counter and staring at his feet.

"What?" she asked concernedly after a few seconds after he didn't continue.

He looked rather guilty, but she didn't have any idea what he could be feeling guilty about; she'd seen him go with Rosa to the evidence room, and they were gone far too short of a time for them to have had sex. She walked over to him and rested her hand on his cheek, forcing him to look up at her.

"You know how Rosa offered yesterday to let us drink from her, but then we got kind of busy last night and never talked about?"

Amy nodded.

"Well, when she whisked me away this afternoon she might have offered to let me drink from her to heal my cut, and I might have said yes," continued Jake, sounding like he was admitting some terrible crime he'd committed.

"Well, obviously you drank her blood. That's what she took you back there for, I presumed," replied Amy, still not getting what he was worked up about. "And she walked back into the bullpen looking fine, so you obviously didn't drink her dry."

"Yeah, but I drank from some other girl without your permission! Even if it was Rosa, and you'd kind of implied yesterday that it was okay," said Jake, sounding slightly irritated that she didn't seem to be getting what he was saying.

"Jake! I don't have a problem with you drinking from Rosa!" exclaimed Amy, laughing, finally understanding what was bothering him. She leant up and kissed him firmly on the lips, running her hand through his short, curly hair, eliciting a soft moan from the back of his throat. "As long as you aren't back there having sex with her, it's fine. I have exclusive rights on that privilege with you. And speaking of which…"

Jake didn't need to be told twice; picking her up as she wrapped her legs around his waist, he carried her into their bedroom.

They reached the end of the week without anyone other than Rosa having discovered their secret, or thinking Jake was any weirder than he always was, and chalking up Santiago's slight weirdness that week to having spent far too much time around Peralta.

Amy knew their facade of normality might be a little tougher to maintain when Captain Holt returned on Monday, but she hoped that a week of practice and the upcoming weekend to practice even more of being normal would be enough to prevent her mentor from thinking she'd gone off the deep end. And she knew Rosa would have their backs if anything less-explainable occurred.

When they had first gotten turned a week earlier, she'd panicked that their detective lives were over, her goals of becoming the youngest Captain in NYPD history shattered forever. But Jake had calmed her down (as had finally breaking down and accepting that she was going to have to feed, and on live, but soon-to-not-be, humans), convinced her that everything was going to be all right, and made her start handling it like she did everything else in her life — with an overabundance of binders.

And now that they were a week into their new lives, she felt okay. Life was never going to be the same, that was for sure, but that wasn't necessarily a bad thing.

A/N: Harry Potter Vampire Stories that inspired this:

On Point: archiveofourown works/ 11467596

From Now Until Forever: archiveofourown works/ 383301