It looked like a meteor-shower and normally it would have been an awesome sight. Now it was the saddest thing imaginable.

Castiel watched as his peers came falling from the sky as shooting stars. It was devastating to say the least and also a little bit of a shock. He had been fooled by Metatron and felt responsible for it all.

Just dealing with the current events was difficult enough in itself. Understanding the emotions that raged through his body was even harder. Not to mention the pain and the gnawing hunger.

Castiel had been aware of these human feelings and emotions through the remnants of Mr. Novak. Sometimes the guy's soul had shone through and given Cas a glimpse of how it was to be human. It was a long time ago. Jimmy was long gone and when Castiel decided to eat or drink it was only because he'd learned to appreciate a few things, not because they were necessary.

He tried to listen for a call. He tried to connect with the fallen angels or the Winchester brothers but the Angel-radio – as Dean liked to call it – was dead. It didn't come as a surprise, his grace was gone and so was all his supernatural powers. Castiel himself had never thought of it as anything supernatural but for a human it was perceived as such.

The chilly night bothered him somewhat. He had never really felt cold before. Castiel wrapped the trench-coat tighter around himself and started to walk towards a distant streetlight. He knew he had to find people. He was hungry and thirsty and his whole body was aching.

He didn't think he was seriously injured from the fall. Metatron had probably made sure of that. The guy wanted stories and it would be silly to kill his storytellers before they had anything to tell. Castiel figured that this was how humans felt when they were beat up. In a flash he remembered Dean's pained face when Naomi ordered Cas to kill him. The guy had probably been in more pain than Castiel experienced now and still he was able to communicate with Cas to end the beating. Dean was obviously a stronger man than Castiel could ever be.

Moving forward was hard with muscles that screamed for relief but he had no other choice. He needed help and he needed food. And he needed to find his family.

He suddenly remembered the cellphone and dug through his pockets to find it. With ice cold hands he managed to pull up Dean's number and after several rings he hear the familiar voice. "CAS. Castiel. Where are you? We ne..." With a short beep the phone went dead and Cas looked at the black screen.

He'd never had to charge it before. He had the ability to restore the battery's power with a touch. He almost threw it into the woods in anger but braced himself at the last moment. This was the only connection he presently had with the boys and if he didn't know how to charge it he could find out.

It was another urgent need that suddenly presented itself. Cas knew exactly what it was all about and for the first time in his life he felt embarrassed. Being human involved some pretty disgusting things too. Eating and drinking caused these beings to have bowel movements and it was with a sigh Castiel dreaded to have to feel that. Right now it was only his bladder that needed to be emptied but he had no clue how it would work.

Cas knew he had to pull his dick out of his pants so he wouldn't pee on himself but touching the thing was weird. He pointed it towards some bushes. He'd seen this done before and tried to mimic the posture from other men.

Nothing happened. His bladder was aching but there was no relief. Castiel realized that he was very tense and tried to relax and let go of the embarrassment of the situation. A few drops came trickling out and landed on his shoes before a nice spurt followed. The feeling was sensational. Castiel had to hitch his breath in order to compose himself. "So" He thought. "If I do this on a regular basis without waiting for the pain this was not so bad."

He shook the penis as he'd seen others do and tucked it back into his pants. He wondered if it would feel the same if he needed to do that other thing but decided not to think about it. He'd have to ask someone how to deal with it and hoped he would find the boys before it was too late.

Castiel continued on his path down the road hoping to meet someone. The streetlights were far apart so he was mostly walking in the dark. When a set of headlights appeared he got excited. Rescue was within reach. He waved as the car passed but the driver obviously didn't see him and Cas almost fell apart watching the red taillights disappear in the distance.

Slightly blinded by the light from the car Castiel could understand why he wasn't spotted. He decided to walk to the next light and hang there until someone showed up. It didn't take long before another car came around the curve and Cas placed himself under the streetlight so he would be as visible as possible.

The beat up pickup truck pulled over with shrieking brakes a few meters away. An older guy leaned over the passenger seat and opened the door. "Get in. Where you goin'?" Castiel climbed into the truck and sighed. "I don't know. I... Sorry." He tried to think of something that made sense. For some reason he knew that telling the guy the truth would not go around well. "I had an accident. I need to find some people."

The guy lifted his brows. "Are you injured? You need to go to a hospital?" Castiel shook his head. "No, I'm fine." He was not fine, but the guy didn't need to know. "I just need to find my family." Castiel himself didn't really know if he was referring to the other angels or to the Winchesters but it didn't matter at the moment. The guy shrugged his shoulder and the truck started to move forward. "Well I'm on my way home. There's a truck-stop up ahead. You'll get a ride from there wherever you're going."

The ride took about fifteen minutes and not a word was uttered until the guy pulled over at a gas-station. "Behind there it's a diner. You'll find someone to help you." The driver pointed towards a couple of big rigs. "The truckers often like the company." Cas got out and thanked the guy but he just waved him off. "No problem." Then he sped away and disappeared.

Castiel drew his breath and walked towards the door to the convenient store at the station before he changed his mind and rounded the corner. There was a small diner there and a couple of guys were hanging outside smoking and laughing. Cas walked up to them and cleared his throat. "I need a ride."

One of the guys turned to him. "Where you going?" Cas still didn't have an answer to that question so he looked down embarrassed. "I really don't know. My family..." The guys chuckled as Cas tried to find the correct words. "I need to call them but my phone..." He pulled the cellphone out of his pocket and showed them the black screen.

"Oh, it died on you? Have to remember to charge it when you're out here." He laughed out loud. "Far between the stops." He pulled out his own phone. "You can use mine."

Cas took it and looked at it curiously. "I don't know how. You don't have his number." He turned his gaze to the guy and shook his head. Another burst of laughter came and the guy grabbed the phone. "Do you have the number?" Castiel tried to think but realized that he couldn't remember Dean's phone-number. "No. I'm sorry. It's in here." He waved his phone in front of the guy.

The two truckers laughed again. "Give me the name. I'll find it." He touched the screen of his phone and Cas could see that his finger moved over it. "Name?" The man asked again and Cas sighed. "Dean Winchester." He looked at the guy's face as the finger typed something onto the screen. "Winchester? As the rifle?" Cas could only nod and soon he had the phone pressed to his ear.

"Hello." Dean's voice sounded a little tentative but Cas almost fell apart from hearing it. "It's Cas." He hitched out trying to stay composed. "I need help." It took a little while before Dean answered - his voice loaded with concern. "Where are you?" Cas still didn't know and threw the question back. "Where are you." Castiel didn't know if he could find Dean but he was pretty sure Dean knew his own location.

"Hey, you obviously borrowed a phone from someone. Hand it to him or her." Dean voice was strict and Cas held the phone up to the trucker. "He wants to talk to you." The guy looked somewhat surprised but took the phone and uttered an hesitant Yeah?

After a few minutes where the guy was obviously listening to what Dean had to say he nodded and looked over at Cas with concern. He soon tucked the phone into his back pocket and gestured for Cas to follow him. "One of my friends is driving in that direction, come on." The trucker chatted with another guy and after looking at Cas rolling their eyes they'd come to an agreement. "He'll help you." The guy said and walked off.

A half hour later Castiel was in a rig on his way to Omaha. The driver had introduced himself as Nicholas. "You can call me Nick." Cas was about to say his name but changed his mind at the last second. "Jim. You can call me Jim." He somehow knew that the name Castiel could bring up questions and he didn't want that. He wouldn't know what to say.

Cas was still hungry. He had no money and he knew he'd need some if he wanted food. The trucked offered him some beef jerky and Cas had grabbed it eagerly and finished of the bag in no time. He apologized but Nick shook his head and smiled. "No worries."

The drive took about three hours and Nick didn't chat too much. Dean had obviously promised to pick Cas up somewhere and suddenly Nick pulled out his phone and dialed a number. He handed his phone over to Cas. "I'll drop you off at the junction between 680 and 29. I'll take the phone if it's difficult for you to explain."

Soon Dean's voice was in his ear and Cas felt his heart – really Jim's heart – skip a beat. "So where are you?" Cas was about to explain but after offering his apologies he handed the phone back to Nick. "Sorry. I'm... I don't know how..."

He didn't pay much attention to the conversation but he picked up a few lines. "Your brother is doing fine. You can be proud." Cas didn't understand squat but he chose to not comment. Nick kept on talking. "For a guy like that he's very well mannered and it as been a pleasure."

Nick hung up and gestured to Castiel for get out. "You're brother will pick you up here within the hour. Take care." Cas climbed down and waved to Nick as the big rig entered the ramp to the highway.

"My brother." Cas chuckled a little to himself. Dean had called him his brother. It gave Cas a good feeling. He didn't have to wait more than twenty minutes before the familiar Impala emerged. Cas got shivers down his spine. The feelings that raged through his body as Dean came out of the car were very difficult to interpret. Castiel wanted to wrap himself around Dean but knew he had to brace himself.

He was afraid that Dean would be mad at him. Cas knew he'd screwed up big time. He held his breath – which was much harder now when breathing was a necessity – until Dean was standing in front of him. "Cas. CAS! I'm kinda angry with you but... at the moment I'm just happy you're okay." He let his hand land on Castiel's shoulder. "I'm sorry I told them you were retarded. It was easier than to tell the truth."

Castiel looked at Dean puzzled. "Uh?" Then he closed his eyes and nodded. So that's why the truckers acted so weird. That's why they so eagerly helped him. He shook his head and smiled. "Don't worry about it. It got me here." Then he scrunched his face and asked the question that had been on his mind for a while already. "Sam? Is Sam...?"

Dean let his arms fall down to his sides before he sighed heavily. "Sam is … alive." He lifted his arms again and pulled Castiel into an embrace. Cas didn't really know what to do and he just let his hand trail up Dean's back. He felt Dean's body tense up a little before he pulled back. "Uh, come on. We have to get back. Sam is alive but he could really need some of your angel mojo now." Dean stepped away from Castiel and gestured for him to get in the car.

Suddenly Castiel got hit by the reality of it all. Dean needed him to cure Sam and that was not an option anymore. If this was the only reason for picking him up Dean was going to be very disappointed. Over the last few hours Cas had refused to ponder over how his life would be like as a mortal. He'd only been concerned with the new feelings and urges.

Castiel's heart sunk. He had been there to protect them. Now he couldn't do it anymore. He stood there frozen in his step. What would happen when Dean learned that he was a human now. That he was a regular man without any mojo or superpowers. What if Dean realized that he was useless to them. He'd probably walk away and never look back.

Dean turned around and looked at Cas puzzled. "What? Come on. We have no time for sappy reunion scenes." Castiel realized that he had walked backwards away from the car. His eyes were stinging and tears were running down his face. "I can't." He hitched out and took another step back. "I'm not..." He couldn't continue. He wanted to tell but his voice drowned in the sobs that came from his throat.

In a few steps Dean was right in front of him. "You're crying? Cas? You're crying?" His hand came up to Castiel's face an wiped his cheek. He looked at his now wet fingers and then he lifted his head to stare into Cas' eyes. "Angels don't cry."

Castiel closed his eyes. He couldn't bear the scrutinizing look. When Dean's hand again came up to his cheek Cas leaned into the touch and sighed heavily. He took a couple of deep breaths to compose himself before he managed to speak. "I'm not an angel anymore." He had to swallow hard before he continued. "I'm useless to you."

Dean's hand disappeared from his cheek and Cas could hear that he cleared his throat. "Oh. That's a plot-twist." Seconds passed and Cas opened his eyes slightly. Dean was still staring but then he moved forward and wrapped his arms around Cas. "You sure? Maybe you're just weakened by the events."

Castiel shook his head before he leaned it onto Dean's shoulder. "I'm sure." Not knowing what was going to happen next Castiel braced himself. He wanted time to stop so he could stay in this embrace forever. A new feeling had appeared in his head and it made his heart skip a beat. "Dean, I'm sorry... I'm..." Dean's hand crawled up his spine and up to his head. "Shush." Dean whispered as his hand tangled into Cas' hair. "I got you."