Ivan Braginski sat huddled on his bed, staring out the window at the snow falling slowly, outside. The scarf woven around his neck hid his lips and the tip of his nose, being warmed by his own breath trapped in the fabric. His eyebrows tipped downwards in a sort of glaring, melancholy expression. The house was empty, and everything was silent, save for the slight shifting of the bed sheets under his weight.
She was gone again. His little Soviet sister, Natalia. She left often these days, to go and spend time with the American boy, Alfred Jones- the one who was always too loud and energetic at the conferences. Many times, Ivan had caught her gazing over at him during those meetings with infatuated violet eyes that once stared at her brother.
He was not blind to what was going on, he knew he was slowly losing her, and he had no one to blame but himself. He had always been the one to push her away when she made advances. Ivan often heard her crying softy in her room at night...after he had rejected her particularly harshly.
"Please brother, please love me..."
"Nyet, Natalia...you must give up this ridiculous fantasy, I will never return your affections. Give up...you will never get what you desire from me."
-
Ivan never felt anything other than family love towards her, and she had always wanted more. She was finally moving on and for some reason it left a taste in his mouth worse than stale vodka.
He closed his eyes and sighed softly, feeling that sickening lump beginning to form in his throat. Shaking his head, the Russian hugged his knees to his chest. He knew he would never love her, so why did it feel so...wrong that she no longer loved him?
"I know I won't keep you for myself..." he murmured to himself, as memories of her coming home with a huge bundle of sunflowers, she had picked for him flooded his mind. "...But I do not want to see you happier with somebody else..." She now brought home flowers to Alfred, sporting that smile that someone of her nature rarely ever showed, even to herself.
A single tear escaped down his cheek silently, and suddenly his house felt much colder and more lonely than usual.
He realized that his most selfish desire was that she continue to chase after him, knowing he will never want her in return. She would be unsatisfied, and neglected forever, not knowing how it feels to actually be loved by another.
"Natalia...why can't you just be lonely?"
(a/n)- I haven't posted a story in a reeally long time, so I'm kinda out of it. Please go easy on me! Reviews are always nice. But thank you for at least reading!