A/N: As per suggested, I was dying to post this. Granted, I'm not going to actually full on start the story until I complete Stuck in the Middle, but I just wanted to get the prologue out there. It'll bother me knowing that I subconsciously wrote this and it's just sitting on my computer. Anyway, it'll be…a little different, and I promise you guys are going to hate Liz in this story. That's all I'm gonna say ;) hope you enjoy.
Disclaimer: Any Law and Order character in this story does not belong to me. The original characters are mine however.
Rachel Givens is proud to finally turn twenty seven, she doesn't know what it is about her twenty seventh birthday but it makes her feel like she's hit a milestone in her life. She feels like she can officially be seen as an actually adult, where as in the past people would still look upon her adolescent. Granted, she was looked upon as a twenty year old adolescent but an adolescent nonetheless.
In honor to celebrate her very own personal coming of age, she decided to go out and party with her two best friends at one of their favorite hang outs. What else would she need other than friends and booze on her birthday?
"This place is super hot." Melanie Taylor says giddily as she takes a sip of her favored tropical drink. "What a way to finally turn twenty seven, huh Rache?"
Rachel hums as she takes a well earned sip of the colorful contents in her glass. "You have no idea." She smiles, swatting the hand of Sasha Kessler as she reaches for a French fire in the basket at the middle of the table. "Don't touch my fries Sasha. Those are birthday fries."
Sasha rolls her eyes as she picks up a fry anyway and then proceeds to make a huge deal out of taking bite of it. "Mmmm and they are very delicious birthday fries." She drawls earning a laugh from her friends.
"So how does it feel to be the great twenty seven?" Melanie asks as she steals one of the notorious birthday fries for herself.
Rachel sighs happily and relaxes even more into the both they're occupying for the night. "I feel old, and believe it or not, very horny."
At this Sasha snorts and fails miserably to hold in her giggles. "I didn't know that turning a year older turned you on so much."
"It isn't so much that turning a year older has turned me on, it's the fact that I haven't been with someone in what seems like forever. A girl has needs, and my needs aren't being satisfied."
The two other girls eye the complaining blonde curiously before turning to each other and sharing a very hearty laugh at their friend's expense. Honestly, they wouldn't expect anything less from Rachel so they don't exactly know why they are at all surprised.
"You reaaaaally need to get out more Rache. There's more to turning twenty seven than just sex." Melanie states giggling at Rachel's exasperation at being sexually frustrated.
Rachel sighs heavily before she rests her head on the back of the both. "But I need to have sex. It's not like it's a want anymore. It has been so long that it has become a NEED for me to get some. I mean, just think about it; think about the longest time you've been without, and then multiply that by a hundred, that is how I feel."
"You could look for someone tonight, you know, just as a filler." Sasha suggests with a small shrug. "Mel and I both know that you aren't looking for something long term at the moment, so why not just go and have some fun on your birthday? Take someone back to your hotel room, and just go at it."
Rachel sits up in the both and grins as she fixes the pony tail her hair is in. "To be honest, that doesn't sound like a bad idea at all." she drawls, a well placed smirk at her lips as she gazes over the other patrons of the bar.
Melanie snickers as she and Sasha watch their best friend scan the area for any kind of potential suitor for the night. They know she's found something when a very satisfied smirk spreads across Rachel's face.
"What about her?" Rachel asks perkily, her finger pointing to somewhere across the bar.
Sasha leans over and follows Rachel's line of vision with her own. She makes a face and cocks her head like a confused puppy when she sees her friend referring to a lean blonde with hair cascading down her back, seated at a table by herself as she seems to absentmindedly stir the contents of the drink before her. Sasha blinks several times before she turns back to Rachel in bewilderment.
"Uh, Rache, doesn't she seem a little…old for you?" the dark haired girl asks curiously, starting to question her best friend's sanity.
Melanie snorts as she remembers the miniscule little detail that Rachel does have a thing for older women, a thing that the two of them haven't particularly discussed around Sasha until now. Scooting over to the edge of her side of the booth, Melanie hums as she lays eyes on the woman in question.
"Oh c'mon Sasha, she doesn't look that old, and I bet she's a lot younger than you think she is." Rachel whines unceremoniously. "Plus, you gotta admit, she is super hot."
"Sasha might have a point, for once." Melanie states, earning her a disapproving look from Sasha. "She might not be that older, but she's still older than you. What if she's trouble? Maybe you should look for someone your age."
Rachel rolls her eyes and groans at how difficult her friends are being. Honestly, why would they tell her to do something if they're just going to act like her parents in the long run?! "You said look for somebody, I did, and I found somebody. Besides, since she's older than me wouldn't that be a bit of a bonus."
"Rache, we just trying to look out for you because we're your friends…"
"Guys seriously, she looks like she maybe weighs a hundred and ten pounds. It's not like she's going to take advantage of me or anything. Tell you what, if she's older than thirty five, I won't sleep with her." Rachel concludes with a wink as she picks up her drink and saunters over to the blonde.
She takes a sip of her drink and puts on her most seductive smile as she slides her hand across the back of the empty chair. She's a bit caught of guard by the pair of icy blue eyes that meet her gaze, but her smile doesn't waver nonetheless.
"Is this seat taken?"
Alexandra Cabot feels numb. Numb to the point where she feels like she belongs in one of those lame movies about the walking dead, and she is the main leader of the antagonizing race. She feels numb on the inside and out, and if she were being honest with herself, if someone asks her what is wrong, the only thing she would be able to respond with is the fact that she feels numb.
The reasons for her feeling completely and totally numb are the fact that the love of her life has recently broken up with her. So recently that it has probably only been a couple of hours or so since it happened, and ever since that, Alex has felt numb.
Granted, now that she thinks about it, it's her own fault that they've broken up. If she weren't such a workaholic, and everything else that's wrong with her, she still might be in a working relationship. But instead, she's stuck in the pitiful rut of a now lonely life, and she doesn't know what to do. She can recall clearly what her lover had said, 'it's only a break' but to Alex, 'only a break' means the complete shattering of her heart.
"Alex, you have to understand that our relationship needs this." Casey Novak states as she watches Alex pace the length of her living room. "There's only so much that I can do on my own, and we can't keep fighting the fact that we're having problems."
Alex blinks several times in an effortless attempt to keep her unwanted tears at bay. She will be damned if she's going to cry, especially right now. "I thought we were fine Casey, I didn't realize that we were having problems. If you were unhappy you should have come to me!"
"I did come to you Alex," Casey exclaims, throwing her arms in the air. "I came to you on several occasions and you just weren't there. You weren't there, you wouldn't listen, and you'd brush everything off as if it were okay. You're putting your job before me Alex. Yes, I get that, I understand what we do is our lives, don't forget that I'm still your ADA, but you just can't put literally everything else before me. I just can't be that part of your life that you run to whenever you feel like it. You can't…you can't just neglect me like you have, and then wonder why I can't deal with this anymore."
"Casey, I'm trying okay? Just…work gets in the way, and I get really busy and I just…I just don't have time for anything!"
"I know that, because you don't have time for me." Casey states sadly as she wraps her arms around herself. "Which is why I think that a break would be good for us; you could focus on your work, and not worry about me pestering you to spend time with me or other petty things like that."
Alex stops her pacing and crosses the room where she takes both of the redhead's hands in her own. "Casey, you aren't pestering me, and I would love nothing more than to spend every waking moment of my life with you. I just…work gets in the way and I try to make time, but things never work out and…"
Casey places her finger over Alex's lips to urge her to stop talking, something that the blonde attorney never seems to do. "I know…you make time, then something comes up, and you have to cancel and in other scenarios you're really tired…I know Alex, I've heard it all before. That's why I think we need this break."
A small whimper escapes Alex's lips as she turns away, not wanting Casey to see her cry. "But…I don't want a break…" she chokes out quietly, her voice mirroring that of a small child whose just been let down over something she's really wanted.
Casey sighs as she places both of her hands on Alex's shoulders, flinching when she feels a small bounce alerting her to the fact that the blonde is crying. Not once in their relationship has she ever seen Alex cry over anything. She's seen her come close, but never ever has she seen her shed a tear.
"Alex honey, it's only a break. It'll give us time to think about 'us' and explore more on what we want. We could see different people at the time, and we could live our lives like-"
"I don't want to see different people Casey!" Alex shouts as she spins around revealing her tear streaked face. "I don't want to see different people, I don't want a break, I don't want time to 'reevaluate who we are'. I don't want any of that! I want you, and I want you because I love you and I want you to love me, and everything can just be back like it was when we first started dating…"
Casey sighs again as she shakes her head once more. "Everything can't be back like it was when we first started dating because you had time for me then. You just don't have time for me anymore."
Alex hands her head in sadness and shame. Never once in her life has she felt more vulnerable, broken, and ashamed all at the same time. "Is there anything I can do…?" she whimpers, not feeling like the strong and together Alexandra Cabot anymore, but just simply Alex who needs someone to hold her.
Casey steps forward and rests her hand on the blonde's cheek, gently stroking the soft skin with her thumb. "I'm afraid not. We just nee time okay?" she concludes before she moves forward and replaces her hand with a gentle kiss. She moves back and picks Alex's jacket up off the couch and hands it to her. "I think you should go…"
Nodding dumbly, Alex takes her hoodie and slips it on before she digs her hands deep into the pockets. She opens her mouth to say something but with the look that Casey is giving her, she decides that she'd be better off saying nothing. So instead of speaking, instead of fighting she simply hangs her head once more as she allows Casey to show her the door. She would fight, it's just that she isn't sure that she has the fight that she needs left in her.
And that reason right there is why Alex finds herself alone at a bar staring blankly into the contents of what is probably her third drink. It's actually amazing once she thinks about it, under normal circumstances after her third drink, she would be on her way to being completely drunk, but tonight…tonight is different. Tonight, even through her drinking, she can still think rationally. Maybe it's because of the pain, or the hurt, or the anguish; she doesn't know, all she knows is that she feels completely numb because of it.
"Is this seat taken?"
Alex is brought out of her thoughts by someone standing by the chair opposite of her. She casts her gaze upward and finds herself met with the cobalt blue eyes of a young blonde who, if Alex has numbers right, looks to be in her mid to late twenties. Honestly, what could this girl possibly want?
Raising her eyebrows in curiosity she decides to humor the girl nonetheless. After all, what does she have to lose? She holds her hand out towards the chair and manages an inviting smile. "Please."
She watches as the girl's flashy smile widens as she sits at the table and places her drink on the table. She studies the attorney for a moment before offering her hand in initiating contact. "I'm Rachel."
Alex takes note of the handshake that's being offered. She knows it's the flirtatious version of the dead fish handshake that is typically meant to signal the giving up the control, but she takes the Rachel's hand nonetheless. "Alex."
Rachel hums upon feeling the older woman's hand grasp her own. "So, Alex, what are you doing over here all by your lonesome?"
"Why do you assume I am alone?" Alex queries, "Unless you've been watching me all night."
"Well, that'll just have to be my little secret now won't it?" Rachel replies with a wink.
Alex chuckles, and crosses one leg over the other as she leans back in her chair. "What can I do for you, honey; a young girl like you doesn't just walk up to someone who is nearly ten years her senior for no apparent reason."
At this Rachel raises her eyebrows in interest. "And why do you assume that I am ten years your junior? How old do you think I am? Please tell me what you think you know."
"I know enough to know that you're still in your twenties." Alex states with a small shrug. "Don't try to tell me I'm wrong. Everyone gets this certain look to them after they turn thirty."
"And have you gotten that look?"
"Had it for four years now." Alex sighs with a small smile as she turns her attention back to her drink.
Rachel hums in interest once more and empties the contents of her own drink. "Well, you can't tell. I turned twenty seven just today."
"Well happy birthday."
"Thank you. So tell me Alex, do you have a girlfriend?"
Alex slightly flinches at the term 'girlfriend' and a look of hurt flashes across her face, but just as soon as it's there, it's gone. "It's complicated…." She mumbles, staring into the amber liquid in her glass.
The younger blonde tilts her head to the side, in small question at Alex's behavior. "You wanna talk about it?"
"Not particularly, no."
"Oh, well then, I guess we won't talk about it."
Alex raises her eyebrows once more and she eyes the young woman in curiosity as she tries to figure out her motives. "What is it you want to talk about?"
Rachel hesitates for a moment before she sighs and sits down her empty glass. "I'll just cut to the chase here. You're a really attractive woman, and you look like you could use some company. Quote your words from before: don't try to tell me I'm wrong."
Alex snorts and laughs lowly at the seduction seeping through the young woman's words. "I'm afraid that I'm a little old for the whole fling thing sweetheart."
"What's that one saying? 'Age ain't nothing but a number'?"
Once again, Alex can feel the gears in her head beginning to turn. As ridiculous as this offer is beginning to sound, she knows that she needs to feel something, anything; anything to help her forget about the pain for the time being. She quickly downs the rest of her drink and stands from her chair.
Rachel smiles as stands from her chair as well and takes the hand of the older blonde. She glances over her shoulder and winks at her friends whose jaws have unceremoniously fallen out to the floor. Whoever said that age mattered?
As always, I promise a happy ending ;) it's just getting to that ending. Leave your thoughts, this is gonna be a bumpy ride hehehehehe.