This story contains scenes of violence and sexual assault.

Olivia nervously fiddled with the loose button on her jacket. They had been driving for nearly six hours and she was starting to feel sick. Elliot was sat next to her silently, the conversation had dried up almost three hours ago. They had been civil, even shared a few jokes but she couldn't hide how uncomfortable she had felt when Elliot strolled into the precinct after six months. They had been requested, by name. Benson and Stabler. Except they weren't Benson and Stabler anymore, they were Benson and Thomas, and Stabler and Jones.

Elliot had told her that he was leaving as they sat in the car on a stakeout. She had looked at him, unable to form a sentence. He explained that he had been thinking about it for a while... He hadn't mentioned it until he was sure but he had to leave for his family's sake. After ten years, he decided that his family had suffered enough and that it was his turn to sacrifice something. He sacrificed her, well, the job but she was a huge part of that. She had, of course given him a forced smile and explained that she understood, that he was doing the right thing, despite the ache in her chest. He had promised they would still see each other and she nodded, unable to speak, knowing that once he was gone that would be it.

They had too much history, too many things left unsaid to be able to form a friendship without the pull of the job. It just wouldn't work.

He had called a few times. He'd asked if she wanted to go for a drink or to have dinner with his family. She had declined. She didn't know to be be 'just' friends with Elliot. She knew how to be his partner, she knew how to draw the line when they were partners. They had shared some of the most difficult times of their lives together, she had come to rely on him more than she had anyone in her life and she'd developed feelings that as long as they were partners, she was able to hide. She constantly questioned herself about just what it was that she felt for him. After year seven or eight of their partnership she was convinced that something would happen between them, then Kathy announced her pregnancy and Olivia realized that she had simply read too much into hers and Elliot's relationship. She had forced herself to accept that they were friends, that relying on each other through such tough times was bound to confuse her. He loved his wife. Eventually, after a few weeks of her thinking of any excuse she could not to meet up with him, he stopped calling, just like she knew he would.

Then, just yesterday, as soon as she walked into the station Cragen had called her into his office and there he was. They'd been requested by the feds for an undercover op, both of them, apparently it was both or neither? If she was really honest with herself, she wouldn't want anyone else, she didn't trust anyone else. She'd only just managed to accept that he was gone, that he wasn't coming back. She had intentionally cut him out of her life, knowing that work was the only thing keeping them he would stop calling, and she couldn't allow herself to hurt by that, so instead, she ended their relationship herself. It was typical Olivia Benson behavior, why give up the habit of a lifetime? Elliot was no different to anyone else who had been a part of her life. She had repeated that sentence more than a few time, he was no different to anyone else...

She had yet to meet his stare. As soon as she'd walked into Cragens office, and the initial shock had worn off she had been Detective Benson, no sign of Olivia. He had tried to start a light conversation in the back of the car, she had answered his questions but he could see that she was uncomfortable.

She had been the only thing preventing him from leaving SVU for years, and now that he had his fears had become reality. He had fully intended to spark up a better friendship with Olivia, he was almost excited about it. He should have known that she wouldn't allow it to happen. He had called, asked her to meet him, even thought about turning up at her apartment but she never replied. She had sent a few messages, that was it. Maybe he had been foolish to think that without the pull of the job Olivia would still want to spend time with him. They just weren't those people.

When Cragen had called, explaining that they were wanted to go undercover to bust a child smuggling ring he had been hesitant. Working at homicide he got home earlier, he didn't have the emotional heartache of the vics, and he spent more time with his children but the pull of SVU and Olivia was always there. he wasn't sure coming back, even for a little while would be good for him. He missed the squad enough, coming back would only remind him why. After Cragen explained that they had been specifically asked for, and that Olivia had already agreed the decision was made for him.

He had missed her more than he would ever admit. He had been so close to changing his mind and coming back, just to see her again. he worried about her almost constantly, was she being looked after by her new partner? Was she taking care of herself? Was she seeing someone? He couldn't count the nights that he had been wide awake just thinking of her. Jesus, he'd missed her.

They were going undercover as Elliot Ronson and Olivia Reed, they were being brought in by a cop who had already spent months undercover as old friends and newly accrued members of the smuggling ring. They didn't know how long they would be under for. They had just twenty four hours as soon as they got to their hotel to get up to speed on their covers. After that they would meed the agent who had already infiltrated the gang and the act would begin.

"Glad the ride is over?" Elliot asked, rummaging through his bag to find a t shirt to sleep in. They had been left alone just a few minutes ago in a cheap motel room with two single beds.

"Yeah," she answered, her stomach still churning from the ling trip. "I didn't realize they'd take us so far away." She had thought that they had been asked because it was in New York but after driving for more than twelve hours they had reached Chicago.

"How have you been?" Elliot asked, sitting across from her on the opposite bed.

"Good," she smiled. "What about you?"

"Good..." he took a deep breath before admitting. "I've missed you." She looked up right away, her eyes meeting his for the first time in nearly twenty four hours.

"Me too..." she looked away, she had to keep it together. He would be leaving her as soon as the op was over, she couldn't get attached.

"Liv..." he started. He wanted to tell her that he was sorry that he'd left her, that if it had been only him to consider he would still be with her. He wanted to tell her that he thought about her every day and he wished she'd answered her God damn phone. He wished she'd met up with him just once, just to prove to her that it could work. He wished that their relationship wasn't so damn complicated.

"Let's... lets figure out who we're supposed to be huh?" she asked, handing him his case file. She wasn't ready for him to try and make things right between them. They weren't going to be right because he was gone. As much as she hated it, they only worked when they were partners, and even then they barely did. The only way they would get through the next god knows how many days was to keep it professional.