Another happy sequal to a fic that haunted me for reasons that will become apparent. Find it and all the other source fics for my sequals under my name at adult. fan fiction .net

Deserving

"Because you deserve it" Warren told her evenly. He raised her skirt with the tip of the hunting knife and began to skillfully cut into the flesh of her thighs.

Willow closed her eyes and let him do whatever he liked. She bit her lip, reluctant to cry out in spite of her considerable pain.

Because she deserved it.

Willow flinched a little as Dawn finished applying the anti-sceptic ointment to her cuts. Dawn finished bandaging her and then helped her pull her jeans up.

Dawnie was getting quite adept at first aid, Willow noted. Maybe she should become a paramedic? Or a doctor?

"Will, this has to stop" Buffy told her.

Willow shrugged. "It's Warren" was all she could say.

"Warren's dead" Xander told her firmly. "It may look like him but that's just your magic. You're doing this to yourself Will, as surely as you held the knife in your own hand, it's your guilt"

Willow shook her head.

"Why are the scars always hidden from view Will?" Dawn asked her, taking her arm. "Why are they never on visible parts of your body?"

Willow stared at the ceiling. "Because I deserve it" she intoned sadly.

"Because you deserve it" the blade of the knife glinted in Warren's hand as he stepped towards her.

Willow stopped him by simply holding out her hand.

"So did you" she replied, sorrow filling her voice.

"Deserve this?" and suddenly he was without his skin, his flesh raw and dripping. Willow was filled with an almost physical pain at the sight.

"Did Tara deserve to die?" she asked him.

Even though his face was a mass of exposed bone and muscle he still registered a moment of hesitation.

"No, it was an accident, I didn't mean to, she just…" he trailed off.

"IT doesn't make this RIGHT!" he yelled again "NOTHING can make this right!"

Willow nodded, accepting what he said before responding "And Katrina?"

"She deserved it!" his skin was back again.

"Did you love her?"

"Yes I loved her" his reply was so immediate she knew instantly it was the truth.

" And what happened to her, what you did, it wasn't your fault? You just loved her so much you couldn't help yourself?"

He nodded before he realised the significance of what he was admitting. He let the knife slip from his grasp.

It vanished before it hit the ground.

"I'm sorry". It was all he had to offer.

"So am I" Willow took his hand. He disappeared as she woke up. She never dreamed of him, ever again.

Xander was slouched in the chair 'on watch', his magazines and coffee flask resting on his lap, his feet propped up on Willow's bed as he snored. Dawn and Buffy slept on either side of her. Willow replaced the covers where they had slipped off Buffy, revealing her Sushi pyjamas. Dawn's pink tank top-style nightie actually looked a lot more grown up, an effect slightly ruined by the fact that she was sucking her thumb.

Willow closed her eyes again and drifted back to sleep. She began dreaming once more the the day she and Tara had taken a picnic to the meadow and laughed in the sunshine at the sight of Miss Kitty chasing the butterflies through the flowers and grasses.

Because she deserved it.