Chapter One - Waiting

Elliot sat watching his son play basketball in the back yard with his friends, Maureen keeping an eye on them. Today was one of the days he couldn't believe how big he had got. How many years it had been since he had seen him for the first time, held in Kathy's arms. What had changed since then.

He was six now. Six years old and in school. Reading, writing, growing up. Calling him Dad instead of Daddy. When did that happen? When did he stop being a baby or a toddler and turned into a boy? Elliot couldn't even remember.

He sighed, and looked down at the coffee growing cold in front of him, the scent still lingering but not appealing to him. Considering downing the lukewarm liquid in one for the caffeine buzz, he picked up the mug but just then, Kathy came into the room.

"Elliot..." she said, and something in her voice made his stomach drop to the floor as he looked at her. "Its Don. He's here. He wants to speak to you." Elliot took a deep breath, and stood up.

"Did he say anything else?" He knew he was stalling as he glanced back out of the window at Eli again. What he wouldn't give to be able to forget his problems in a game of basketball. Kathy shook her head.

"No. He's in the front room." Elliot walked past her, and she resisted the urge to put her hand on his shoulder. She knew he wouldn't even bother to shrug it off, but just carry on walking as if she hardly existed. Watching him leave, she sighed. Perhaps this time, it would be news. Perhaps this time, their wait would be over.

"Captain." Elliot walked into the room with his hand outstretched. The older man stood and shook hands, squeezing it slightly before sitting back down.

"Elliot. How are you?" His eyes were concerned, and although he could hardly bear to see that worry within them, Elliot met his look, searching for any sign of what was coming.

"I'm good. But....you didn't come out here to ask me how I am." Don nodded in understanding. He could see Elliot wanted him to come out with it, but he still didn't know how to say the words.

"No, you're right. I didn't. They........" he suddenly found that his voice was catching, and he watched as the younger man's face fell before his eyes. "They......" he broke off as Elliot choked, and then spoke, his own voice harsh with emotion.

"They found her, didn't they." His eyes were pleading as they looked at his old boss, but even he wasn't sure what they were pleading for. Did he want the affirmative or the negative? Did he want to stop hoping? Did he want to know for certain, one way or another?

"No," Don said. "But they found him."

Elliot let go of the breath he had been holding. So long, and he had finally shown up.

"Where? When?"

"Just outside DuBois, PA. His car went off the road last night, seems he fell asleep. The I.D they found on him was fake, the car was stolen four years ago and he was unconscious so they ran his DNA to try and get an identity. It came up as a match."

They sat in silence for a minute as Elliot absorbed this information. Finally, the elusive man they had been searching for for so long. That 'John Doe'. And he had been found because of pure, unadulterated luck.

"Are they bringing him in?" he asked. Don nodded.

"Yeah. Fin went to pick him up personally. Its been.........5 hrs since he set out. They should be on their way back by now."

Elliot stood up suddenly, turning to look out of the window and running his hand down his face. For a second he considered yelling at Don for the time it had taken for him to come round and tell him. Five hours at least since they'd known, almost certainly a lot longer, and he was only just finding out. Even Fin had known before him. However, hearing the faint sounds of children's laughter in the background, he took a deep breath, and looked at his ex-captain again.

"I want to be there. When he's questioned." Elliot's voice came out more aggressive than he intended, but he saw nothing but understanding in Don's eyes. His head was swirling and he was feeling sick to his stomach, but he knew that he wanted to see the man.

"You can watch. But you won't be allowed in to speak to him. I can't let anything jeopardise this Elliot. And with your temper......."

Surprisingly, Elliot didn't mind. He understood where Don was coming from. It had been too long, and yet he knew that he would never be able to control himself if he was put in the same room as that guy. His fists bunched up even thinking about it.

"Lets go then." Don nodded and stood up, walking out of the room in front of Elliot who grabbed a coat from the hallway as he passed. Kathy saw them from the kitchen, and came up the hall as Elliot shrugged it on.

"Its to do with her, isn't it?" she said, concern showing throughout her face and body as she looked between them both. Don nodded,

"Yeah. We've got a possible lead." he said, stepping one pace closer to the door.

"OK."

"I don't know when......." Elliot mumbled, looking at her but not quite seeing her as he let the sentence trail away.

"I know. Just......call me if.........if you know anything for certain. We'll be here when you get back." She reached out and squeezed his hand. For a second he squeezed back, and then he was gone, the door shutting behind him.

Kathy leant against the wall, listening to the sound of Eli and his friends still playing. She didn't know when he'd be back, when she'd get a call one way or another. But she knew what waiting felt like. She'd been doing it for so long already.

The two men were silent as they drove into the city, each caught up in their own thoughts, not even music from the radio breaking the stillness of the air. Elliot barely noticed the streets going past, didn't register the route he had taken for so many years, the differences that had appeared since the last time he ventured into the city. It wasn't until they pulled up outside the precinct that he was jolted out of his reverie and got out of the car.

Walking into the squad room with Cragen, it was almost as if he had never left. As if the years hadn't passed. He looked around, not seeing the different names on the lockers, the different photos on the desks, instead still seeing her coat slung over the back of her chair, her dark head looking up to meet him as he walked in the door.

"Elliot, this is Captain Price." Don said, touching Elliot's arm slightly to get his attention. Elliot came too and offered his hand towards the woman.

"It's good to meet you Detective Stabler. Although, I wish it could be in better circumstances." Her voice was surprisingly warm and her handshake firm but comforting.

"Thank you. Me too." He took her in for a second, the fading blonde hair swept back into a bun, the sharp suit, the air of authority she carried. This wasn't someone to be messed with, and yet he could sense a softer side as she looked at him, as if she really cared for the job and what she was faced with.

"Don, I've just got a couple of things I need to run by you," she said, glancing at him and then looking back at Elliot. "Please, make yourself back at home. They won't be here for a few hours yet."

He nodded, and watched as they walked into the Captain's office before moving further into the room distractedly. For something to do, he poured himself a coffee and sipped it, leaning back against the side and letting his mind wander. Suddenly, it really was five years ago again.

He looked up as she sighed and threw her pen down on the case files she had been looking through, brushing her hand through her hair and leaning back to look at him.

"You should call it a night," he said, pausing for a minute to assess her red eyes and the dark circles underneath them.

"I'm not done yet," she replied, putting her arms down onto the desk and picking the pen back up again. "I just...maybe I need another coffee." He stood and picked her almost empty coffee up, walking over to the machine and pouring the thick black sludge into two mugs, grimacing slightly at its strength .

Watching her for a second, he smiled at how quickly she immersed herself back into the files. He could tell she was distracted though, she kept clicking and unclicking the pen as she read, and rubbing her spare hand round the back of her neck.

"Here." He put the coffee down in front of her and sat against her desk, wrapping his hands around the warm china.

"Thanks." She picked up the mug and took a sip, pulling a face as she swallowed. "God, how long since that was made." He smiled.

"Hey, it could be worse, Munch could have made it."

"True." She turned another page and then looked up at him as he carried on looking at her.

"What?"

"You look like crap," He said, drinking his own coffee. She smiled, and snorted as she ran her eyes up and down him.

"You're hardly looking your best yourself," Their eyes met for a second, and both acknowledged the concern for each other, and the exhaustion they were both feeling.

"Maybe you're right. I could do with at least a few hours." She closed the file and put it to the side, standing up and pulling her coat from the back of the chair. "You going home too?"

He shook his head.

"Nah. I'll wake Eli up if I come in this late, and then none of us will get any sleep. I'll just crash in the crib." She nodded and picked up her bag, slinging it over her shoulder.


"OK. See you bright and early."


"Bring better coffee!" He called after her as he watched her walking towards the elevators, and she looked over her shoulder, smiling at him before disappearing.

A shout from the corridor brought Elliot back to the present and he blinked a couple of times, trying to clear the images from his head. He looked around him but apart from a couple of people dotting in and out of the room he was still alone.

Barely able to resist the urge to go and sit down at his old desk, to start working on a case, to do something, his eyes rested on a file sitting on the desk nearest him. Munch's old desk. It was open and there, looking back at him with dark eyes and hair swept back, was Olivia's face.