Barney and the Tricky Trickster's Treasure Trove Town by the sea shore
(Big Barney is friend too all? But now things have change? Barney help the flock of tiny kids? But at what cost to his life? Barney is good man? But now he must learn how be great king?)
It was Christmas eve and all threwhout the land it was time for barney to deliver present to guud boys and girl. Barney was all-ways afraid to deliver gifts because he was allergic to milk and cheeses and cheesepuffs and other dairy products and they made him swell up like purple-grape balloon dinosnoor! But he was going to be carefl this year as he kiss mrs. Claws on the cheek and say this:
"You dew not worry! I am not going to eat any dairy products while amon the job."
"BEE CAREFUL!" mr. clause shoutstys. "IF YOU EAT DAIRY YOU WILL BE DEAD IN HORRIFIC FASHION!"
Barney give wise nod of approval and then fly aaway.
ChaPter two – barney eats the cheese:
Barney went down the chimney f first house and saw small child sitting in front of fire plac.
"What are you doing?" Barne ask. "fire could propagate in you hair!"
"BRNEY!" small child yells. "I cannot elive you our hear!"
Barny gives BIG. TOOTHY. GRIN. and struts around room.
"BANRY!" small child yells so loUd his face turn bright crimson red! "have my holiday cheeses!"
Barney look at the holiday cheesees. They look like tasty treat for dino as big as he. "I am of superior girth! I require the food now! " barney yelled. Barney then push the child aside and eated all the cheesed!
"BORNY NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" the child shout now. "you are llergic tew cheese!"
Barnnie reels back in shock. He is shooking all over his body! Barney think he safe at first but then he looked into his mouth with his eyes and saw that he HAD A CHHESE ON HIS UVULA!
Barney begin to cry and whale. "I am going to perish!" barney say. "and now this s the end of the storyy….."
Chapter 3: the demon inside us
Barney is having fever dream. He is dream of his friend. He thinks of himself and his trisaritops partners. They are monster and ARE EXTINCTON! Barney is rotting inside his costume like dead fish. Barney prepare to close his eyes.
"I will die" he say. ….."now."
The small child stop him. "no onono! I can help you still!" here. Listen to my favorite song!"
Barney oPen up his ear lobe and small child turns on radio player. The song is by by by Lincoln park. And he sing it like thiss: (0you sing with it for the best results))
""I am dark flower
Blossoming in the winnd
Now my time has come and life shall soon begin.
Nobody understands me. Nobody can.
When I am with you.
I feel like such a ham.
I'm DARK! IVE ALWAYS BEAN DARK! DARK SINCE THE six GRADE!
BUT NOW I AM gooooooooooone"
chPTeR 5 the end of the story
barney opens all three of his eyes. HE IS LIVE!
"thank you for save me small child," barney thanks.
"DO NOT you understand?" small child says as his face turns into a smile. "I AM NOT what you believe."
"huh?"
Just then, the samall child glows brightly and turns into GIANT BALL Of wet CLAY! tHe clay separates into many clays and thEn the clays turn into peoples!
BARNEY ISS SHOCKEDDD! "you are every child on the earth!"
Every child on plaet earth now surround barney and clap for him. IT IS FINALLY THE HAPPY EVER AFTER TIME!
Barney looks to the children oand he proceeed to flosss dance. The children love it.
"this remind me of a song!"" says barnyman. "I Love you! Yew love me. Wdereer bewt friends ads freidns coeldd bee! Wontgt you say you lovee me tooooo. Thank you, little boys and girls!"
The children stop cheering and small sindy-loo who is no more than two struts over to barney. "did you just assume my gendr?"
More kid step forward! "hey! Black lives matter to! What about them, huh!?"
More childs come to barney now! "you are fat-shaming me! And you do nut respecc my orientation!"
Barny immediately turns around and shoves the entire platter of holiday cheesess down his purple esophagus. He dies a horridly, disgusting, drawn out death, but his suffering is infinitely preferable to the endless dogma and suffering of modern American capitalism.
THE END