Disclaimer: I do not own Rampage. It belongs to Warner Bros. and Midway.


Goodbye, Peoria

They weren't sure exactly what had happened to them. A scientist named George, who worked in Scumlabs, had invented a potion that could increase the size and strength of a living creature, but he had made the mistake of trying out the potion on himself as well as his wife, Lizzie, and their old friend, Ralph. It had increased their size and strength, all right, but it had also turned them into three mighty animals which had an appetite for humans and enough rage to destroy a city. Now George was an Ape, Lizzie was a Lizard, and Ralph was a Wolf!

The potion had gone bad!


"State of emergency!" said the president, "The Ape, the Lizard, and the Wolf are on a Rampage!"


Together, the three giant beasts stomped into the nearest city, Peoria, Illinois. They had no memory of being human now, and the only thing on their minds was the intention to smash, destroy, and eat. So they got to work on the city at once.

George the Ape climbed up an apartment building. A young woman looked outside her window and screamed at the sight of the big simian. In response, George reached out with speed and grabbed her. Then he popped her into his mouth and ate her, enjoying the taste and the texture. Then he proceeded to pound and punch the building all over.

By this time, the military had been called in to deal with the problem of the monsters, and men with guns, dynamite, flame throwers, and helicopters tromped into the city, leveling their weapons at George, Lizzie, and Ralph. On the building he clung to, George punched the nearest helicopter, smashing it and causing it to explode, but more followed.

Lizzie pounded a tank that rolled in to shoot at her, destroying it. Ralph crushed the walls of another building, grabbing plants and money as he did so, and eating a businessman along the way. George climbed down his building and hit it at its foundations, and it began to collapse, crashing to the ground and taking all its inhabitants with it. It was lots of fun to go on a rampage, wasn't it?

Lizzie the Lizard, not wanting to be outdone by George and Ralph, climbed up a really tall skyscraper, smashing windows and walls. A few men gaped at her from their windows, but she proceeded to eat them, one by one. Oh boy, were they tasty, or what? One man escaped her clutches by ducking back inside, but no matter. He would be crushed when she destroyed the building, which she did after grabbing a little bit of money from one window. One of the helicopters fired at her and landed several bullets on her reptilian body. She winced in pain, but continued to attack the building. As she jumped to the ground, the skyscraper collapsed, and smashed to pieces on the ground.

Ralph the Wolf was older than George and Lizzie, and had a harder time evading the weapons of the human military, but his exploits were pretty impressive nonetheless. He brought down a smaller building at the same time that an intrepid soldier left some dynamite by his feet. It exploded, and he was almost blown off his feet. He got up and ate the retreating dynamite man with little problem, but then the other gunmen attacked with a vengeance. After a few more attacks, Ralph felt a funny sensation go through his body. He was shrinking, and he was turning human again!

When the transformation was complete and he regained his humanity, he was certainly grateful to be human again, and yet, for some reason, he felt like he somehow missed his maniacal rampage around the city. Then he realized that he was completely naked. He couldn't wear any clothes while he was the Wolf, and his human clothes had been torn off when he transformed into the beast. Embarrassed, he hid his shame with his hands and began to shuffle away from the scene of the crime.

Meanwhile, George and Lizzie had finished off the rest of the city they were rampaging through, and let out savage roars of triumph at their success. But their hunger for human flesh and desire to destroy buildings wasn't sated, and they soon moved on to another, bigger city in Illinois.


They proceeded to hack, smash, and eat their way through their latest downtown venture, but unfortunately, the military had evidently followed them there. They started to hammer George and Lizzie more aggressively, but the giant animals were still able to hold them off. George ate two more lovely young women who screamed at his appearance when they made the mistake of peeking out their windows, and then he stole their money. He made the mistake, however, of punching an electrical sign on a restaurant business, and he got a nasty shock, but he recovered quickly and resumed his rampage.

And Lizzie? She was having fun eating fit young men. She had always wanted to eat some big boys with beefcake bodies. But she kept making the mistake of eating some of the men with bombs and flame throwers, and when she did, she spat fire, scalding her throat. That wasn't so tasty! As she was distracted by another spout of fire from her mouth, some men with guns in a nearby building let fire their fully automatic rifles. Lizzie was pelted with gunfire. In her anger she began to climb the building and demolish it, devouring the gunmen with lightning reflexes.

As the building started to collapse, Lizzie prepared to jump off it, but a chopper flew in behind her and shot her in the back. Instead of jumping off, she fell off, straight to the ground. Upon impact, she felt herself changing, too. She swiftly changed from a giant lizard to an attractive, naked young woman with a terrible taste in her mouth and a feeling of having been through an exciting time. She suddenly realized that she was naked, and clutched her chest and crotch as she quietly ran away to take refuge from the mayhem she had caused.

And as for George, he had destroyed the chopper that shot at Lizzie, but more were moving in to get him. He continued his own rampage throughout the city, eliminating a few more buildings and eating some more women, but the military had doubled their efforts, and were now beginning to overwhelm him. Still, he was determined to leave his mark on this part of the country of America by finishing off this city.

Eventually, he was down to one building left. He was smarting from wounds given him by the soldiers trying to defend what was left of the city, but he was still hanging in there. He climbed the medium-height building, looking for women to devour, but strangely, there were none. There wasn't much there that would help him regain his strength. So he just hurried up and pounded the walls into dust and dirt rapidly, and started to move toward the foundations to finish it off.

But before he could finish the job, one more helicopter shot him from behind, and he fell off the still-standing building, right on top of a set of dynamite sticks. The dynamite blew up, and soon, George, too, was turning human again. He wondered what had just happened, and then he noticed his own nakedness. Clutching his crotch, the humiliated scientist made a quick getaway.


"Thank God the Rampage is over!" remarked the president.

THE END OF RAMPAGE