Another Clintasha story! :)
"Want to take this somewhere more private?" he asked me with a sick smile.
I hate seduction missions. I may be good at them, but I don't have to like them.
I feel like I am betraying Barton.
I'm not with him in that way, but i've always had a connection with him. I can't tell what it is, but...I know that one day it will ruin me. Emotions make you weak and vulnerable.
Romeo and Juliet did not die because of fate. They died because of love.
"Of course." I smiled seductively at him.
I jumped off the seat I was in and went to the exit of the club swaying my hips.
He followed, of course.
I grabbed his hand as we left and dragged him far down into an alleyway.
I pushed him against the wall and smashed my lips onto his.
I wish they were Barton's.
Wait...what the hell am I saying? Get back to work!
The target was at least sixty. He was in the business of sex slaves. Disgusting.
Once I assured he was fully distracted, I pulled out the gun hidden underneath my top and shot him twice in the chest.
He fell to the ground and I saw the S.H.I.E.L.D extraction team at the end of the alley.
"We're here to collect him. The car will take you back to the Avengers Tower, Miss Romanoff." one of the agents informed me.
I nodded and got into the car.
Thank goodness. I was going back to see Clint.
I had missed him on this mission. It had been a week since I last saw him at the tower.
He told me he had a mission of his own.
Flashback
"I'm going for a whole week. Are you sure you can cope without me?" he asked as he was preparing his mission bag to leave.
No. I probably wasn't going to be able to cope without him.
"I have a mission tomorrow and Clint, you are not the centre of my universe." I replied.
"Yeah, yeah. Whatever you say."
He put his bag next to the door and then came back over to me. I was leaning against the bed post.
"Look," he said grabbing my shoulders "I'll see you when I get back. Don't let Stark wreck the tower while i'm gone."
"I'll try my best." I said smiling.
Suddenly he pulled me into a hug and I wrapped my arms around him. What am I doing?
We had never done this before, but it felt unusually natural to be in his arms.
I pulled him closer to me sniffing his scent.
Breathing out, I felt so comfortable with him. I didn't want to let him go.
He pulled me tighter and whispered "I'm gonna miss you Tasha."
I went close to his ear and whispered back to him "I'm gonna miss you too Clint."
I smiled feeling happy for once in my life.
Then I thought about the situation.
This couldn't happen. Why am I even doing this?
Love is for children.
I pulled back and put my Widow face back on.
"Have a good mission, Barton." I said refusing to let emotion reach even the tips of my words.
He nodded and said "You too Natasha."
Taking that as his cue to leave, he went to the door, picked up his bag and stepped into the corridor.
Before he shut the door, he looked into my eyes and said "Stay safe Tasha."
He shut the door and I whispered to myself "Stay safe Hawk."
I didn't sleep on the way back to the tower. I was just excited about seeing him again.
How was Clint able to pull that emotion out of me?
He would already be there when I got back and that thought made me happy.
We were now driving through the streets of Manhattan and I could not stop thinking about seeing Clint again.
I missed him so much. What would I do without him?
"Agent Romanoff, are you okay?" I snapped out of my thoughts and turned to the driver.
"You have not moved for several minutes. Is something wrong?" he asked.
I didn't realise that we had already stopped outside the tower.
"Nothing at all. Thank you." I replied as I got out of the car.
I hadn't had time to change and was still in my party gear.
Cameras at the Avengers Tower were snapping around me like crazy.
Why can't people find something else to photograph apart from what i'm wearing today?
I managed to squeeze through to the crowds to get to the door.
I was going back to see my Clint.
My Clint! What has he turned me into? A teenage girl?
I got in the lift and made my way up to the living room floor.
I couldn't stop grinning. Stop being so happy about this! I told myself as I neared the floor.
The doors opened and I saw Steve and Hill sitting together holding hands, Pepper sitting on Tony's lap, Bruce on his own and...wait where is Clint?
"Hey Spidey. Where's Clint?" Stark said.
"I was about to ask you the same question." I said sternly not letting my emotions get to me.
Where is he?
"He hasn't arrived yet. I thought that he would get here with you." Pepper said standing up, curious about where he was too.
"No. I haven't been informed of his whereabouts." I said, keeping things professional.
"Sir, Director Fury is on the line. He wishes to speak to Agent Romanoff."
"Even if I don't grant access, it will happen anyway so patch the old boss through to us." Stark said.
Fury came up on the screen looking more concerned that usual.
"Where is he?" I asked. I already knew that he was here to talk about Barton.
"He's currently in a S.H.I.E.L.D helicopter and is being transferred to the tower now, so he can be treated at your medical facility." Fury said.
Medical?
"I bet he's just making a fuss about nothing." I hoped it was nothing. "So, what's happened to him then?"
Fury hesitated.
That never happens.
It's Fury.
My eyes went wide with concern.
"Nick...what has happened to Barton?" I asked.
My eyesight was becoming cloudy by tears that were so close to release from my eyes.
I have only cried once in my life. My childhood doesn't count.
The only time I did cry was in the company of Clint.
My body was threatening to betray me as I started to feel like I was shaking.
"Natasha" he only addressed me like that in emotional situations. Oh God.
"He's not waking up from a very serious coma."
And just like that. My world shattered.
I fell on my knees in front of the screen and a tear left my eye.
Was he ever going to wake up?
I put a hand over my mouth in shock.
How was I going to cope without him?
I needed to see him. Now.
I took a deep, yet shaky, breath, stood up and asked "How long until Clint gets here?"
"He should be on the rooftop in 30 seconds. I will visit soon. Fury out."
I wiped away the single tear that was on my cheek once Fury had gone and the Avengers stared at me.
I thought they would stare out of insanity, because my usual persona does not consist of this emotion, but they looked sympathetic. Even Stark.
"Stark, tell medical about the situation. I'll go get him." I ordered.
Stark just nodded and the other Avengers went with him apart from Pepper and Hill.
They came over to me and Maria said "He'll be alright you know. He's a fighter. You know it. I know it. Everyone knows it. I've seen enough evidence to last a life time."
"I know he'll be alright. He has to be." I said quietly as we went over to the elevator, stepped inside and pressed the rooftop button.
How could he be in a coma? How was this possible? Out of all the people in the world, Clint deserved this the least.
Once we arrived at the roof, the helicopter was already on the landing pad and powering down.
I ran over and climbed inside.
I saw Clint lying down on the bed, his body covered in bandages and his eyes closed.
I sprinted over to him and touched his face.
Stroking his cheeks, I realised that this could be it. I may never be able to speak to him again.
I pulled him into a hug and squeezed him tight. If he was alive, he would probably tell me I was suffocating him and laugh. I needed his laugh right now.
Pepper came into the helicopter and spoke up. "We need to get him to medical immediately, Natasha."
I pulled myself away from him and let the medical staff push the trolley he was on into the lift.
The lift was quite big and could fit the bed with a couple of other members of staff.
I got off the helicopter as the doors of the lift were closing and I watched as his face disappeared behind the sliding doors.
I couldn't deal with this.
I felt my legs get weak and I crashed to the floor.
My vision started going black as I saw Maria and Pepper leaning over me.
Who knew that today was the day that my emotions would ruin me.
I woke up to the sound of a machine beeping and some people talking. I couldn't tell what they were saying, but it sounded like Rogers and Hill.
I opened my eyes and saw Hill sitting on Steve's lap.
"Finally, your awake. It's 9pm by the way." Hill said.
"Where's Clint?" I asked. I didn't care about introductions at the minute all I wanted to do was find Clint.
I started to sit up and push back my duvet to leave, but Hill stopped me and said "Get back into bed and I will tell you what has happened."
I sighed, leant back down and said "So, what happened to me and, more importantly, what happened to Clint?"
"You fainted. I know you didn't have any sleep on the way here, but I don't think that is why you fainted. I've seen you in missions lasting 36 hours without any sleep. I believe it was because of emotional stress. Not physical." Maria stated.
"What? That can't be. I'm not under emotional stress." I said more to try and persuade myself as well as Hill.
"I don't believe that." she stepped forward. "Barton hasn't woken up yet."
The machine beeping next to me was my heart rate...and it was increasing dramatically. My body was betraying me.
"Your heart thinks very differently to what you say" Steve said getting up and walking to the left hand side of my bed as Maria stroked my shoulder in an attempt to calm me down on the right side.
"Where is he? Take me to him." I said to Steve.
"You know we can't do that Natasha." he replied, but he sounded as if he wanted me to do it myself.
"I'm going to find him." I got up and stepped off the bed.
They just let me pass. They know what I am like when I am angry.
If I had a serious condition or any problems then they would have told me.
I ran out of the room and the Avengers were all outside a room down the corridor from mine.
"Natasha, I wouldn't go in there." Stark said as I ran towards them all.
The room had black glass preventing me from seeing inside. Damn it.
"Why do you care all of a sudden?" I asked him. What had caused him to change?
"Romanoff," he started. "Your good at seduction, anyone can tell you that. Your good at faking emotions. But your not good with reality. You can't admit it yet, but it will break you when you see him. I may not be good at being human, but I am good at reading them."
"Shut up!" I said, getting angrier by the minute.
"You may fool the others, but you don't fall me Red."
"Be quiet and GET OUT OF THE WAY!" I shouted into his face, pushing him out of the way.
I pushed the door open and ran inside.
Once I was inside, I locked the door to make sure no one came in.
Clint had tubes sticking into his body, scars all over his face and...his eyes were shut.
I gasped. How could this happen?
He looked so weak and vulnerable.
Tears were streaming down my face and my breathing was becoming laboured.
I dropped to the floor and pushed myself up against the wall next to his bed.
"No. No. NO! Please! I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOU." I screamed.
I held my head in my hands and I began to shake violently.
I couldn't control my body.
I think I was having a panic attack. I've never had one in my life.
Panic attacks. Okay. What have you read about them?
S.H.I.E.L.D files. Emotional processes. Panic attacks.
Okay, slow breathing. Can you do that?
Not with all this stupid knocking and shouting at the door.
Breathe. Just breathe.
My breathing began to slow and I reached up, gripping my fingers onto the side of the bed to pull myself up to a standing position.
I put my hands on his face and planted a kiss on his forehead.
"Please don't leave me. You got that? You will not leave me." I said into his ear.
I really hope that he is not aware of his surroundings right now.
What have you done to make me so dependent on you? I never needed anyone before. Why have you changed me?
I stood up, shook myself out of my thoughts and went towards the door, which was still producing sounds of people shouting and knocking.
I opened it quickly and Stark fell flat on his face.
He looked up at me and said "Ow. That hurt."
The other Avengers, who were crowded round at the door, stepped over him into the room.
Tony stood up too, mumbled something along the lines of "Stupid Russians" and shut the door.
"So, what are we going to do doctor?" I asked Banner.
"We nearly lost him yesterday, but he is now in a stable condition." he said. My heart ached.
"You...you nearly lost him?" I asked hesitantly.
He could have died and never known that I...that I...
"Yes, but thankfully we didn't. He got here just in time. He should wake up within a couple of hours if we are lucky."
"And if we're not lucky?" I questioned. I didn't really want to know the answer, but I needed to know the reality of the situation.
But he didn't answer. He just looked down at the floor.
I sighed and pulled up a chair sitting next to Barton.
The others just discussed what they were going to do for the rest of the night, but I zoned out and focused on Clint.
How would I deal with him not being around? I can't live without him.
3am
The Avengers have been switching watch duty for Clint for the past 6 hours.
They all felt that they had a responsibility to him.
He was part of the team. And the team always looks out for each other.
However, I was no so fond of this system when it came to Tony's turn.
"So then I said to Pepper, 'Why do I have to fly half way around the world to sign a contract? You do own the company anyway!' Ridiculous." he complained.
"Ridiculous." I dead-panned.
I looked back at Clint as Stark started to speak again. Oh the joy.
"Look, we all know you care about bird-brains over here," he said gesturing to Clint with a pen he had stolen from one of the nurses to write 'Tony Stark waz 'ere' on the medical bed. "so why don't you just tell him how you feel."
"I do not have feelings for Clint." I said.
"Bullshit. I've seen the way you look at him. It's the same way Pepper looks at me. The same way I look Pepper. The same way Clint looks at you."
Wait, what?
"Clint...looks at me like that."
"Uh, not just looks at you. He always talks about how beautiful and amazing you are 24/7. It's quite annoying actually. Especially him talking about being with you."
He does what!
"Wait a second...what does he say exactly?"
"Stuff along the lines of 'Nat looks gorgeous today' or 'why can't I be with her' or some mopey sad shit like that!"
"Tony, why didn't you tell me this before." I was getting VERY irate with him.
This was not happening! I can't believe Clint felt like this about me! God, Stark is such an idiot.
"I didn't think it mattered."
"YOU SHOULD HAVE TOLD ME THIS BEFORE!" I screamed standing up to meet his face.
"What difference would it have made? YOU DON'T WANT TO BE WITH HIM ANYWAY!"
"HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT!" I screamed in his face.
Stark's mouth dropped and I took a step back, shocked that my emotions had taken over.
"I knew it." he said quietly. Okay. Black Widow tactics.
"Stark," I said threateningly. "If you tell anyone, I will murder you."
Stark just smiled and said "I knew it." again.
I rolled my eyes and slumped back down in my chair.
"What am I gonna do?" I asked, more to myself than Stark, but he replied anyway.
"You have to tell him. He's crazy about you too. Please stop him from torturing us with his long speeches about you. It is getting boring."
"I can't just tell him. And as for me, i'm not meant to have emotions." I argued.
It was true. I was the Black Widow.
"You may be the Black Widow, but you are also Natasha Romanoff."
That was also true.
"Since when did you become such a love guru?" I asked.
He just shrugged and guessed "Pepper?"
"Wouldn't be surprised. She does all of your work anyway."
"At least I have a romantic relationship."
"Love is for children."
"I think you're wrong." he challenged.
"Please enlighten me."
"You made that motto from when you were a child. You were abused and you lost all trust in men."
Oh great.
"You read my file." I said matter of factly.
Of course he did.
"But Barton is different and you know it." he continued. "Barton would never hurt you like that. You see romance as a weapon, not a celebration. Me and Pepper have something amazing." Tony said smiling. He really did love Pepper.
"And you should have something like that too."
Where has all this come from?
"Also, I know for a fact that he hasn't got laid for a VERY long time."
Nope. He's back.
"God, you're an idiot." I said.
"God, you're in love with Barton." he replied.
"I am not in love with him, Stark." I argued.
"Don't lie to me Romanoff."
"I'm not."
"So then Spidey...tell me how you feel. I can be your mentor or whatever people have when they are going through an emotional breakdown."
"Tell you how I feel?" I asked.
"Yep. Go on. I know you have some emotion in there deep down. Like really deep down. Maybe." He was fiddling with something on his phone. Probably texting Pepper.
"What do you want me to say?"
He began speaking in a professional voice. "Okay. So Miss Romanoff, I would like to begin by asking you a couple of que-"
"Cut the crap Stark."
"Fine, as long as you answer honestly."
"Okay, yes."
"Would you protect him with your life?" he asked.
"I already do." True.
"Would you die for him?" he said remaining to look at his phone. What was so interesting?
"Yes." True, but that's for any partnership.
"Who do you trust the most?"
"Fury." Total lie.
"Don't lie to me!" Stark said.
"I'm not lying. I trust Fury the most."
"Romanoff, I have the lie detector equipment that S.H.I.E.L.D use. I know that they put a chip in you to do that kind of stuff. You can beat any other tests that they have apart from this, because it is inside of you and studies your heart rate. I can tell you are lying. I don't even need the tech. I just need to look at you." he said showing me the phone.
Shit.
"Stark, you are not allowed to do that!" I argued.
"Answer the question."
"Fine...it's Clint."
"Thank you." he said exhaustedly. "Carrying on, do you like him any more than just a friend?"
"..."
"The lie detector will tell me the truth. Even when you try to avoid something by changing the subject it will alert me. Good luck lying on this one Romanoff."
"...okay."
"Okay? What do you mean okay?"
"I mean yes! I like him more than a friend."
"I am so happy that technology exists. Okay next question...do you love him?"
Am I in love with him? I don't even know what love is.
"No." I responded hoping that I wasn't.
I couldn't be compromised.
Stark looked at his screen, back up at me and then to the screen again.
"Well...what does it say?" I questioned.
"It says that you're..." he looked up to me. "...that you're lying."
"But that means..." I trailed off because I couldn't believe what I felt. I looked at the floor.
"It means that you love him." he sounded just as surprised as I was.
"But I can't." I looked up to meet Tony's eyes. "I can't."
"Why not?" he questioned.
"I am the Black Widow."
"You may be her. But you are also Natasha Romanoff. Let her have a life too."
I stumbled out of the room, unable to deal with the emotions that were being created.
I loved him?
How could I love him and not even know.
How was this even possible?
How was I going to explain this to him? I guess I was gonna have to...Stark would probably tease me about it until i'm dead anyway.
I kept walking until I got to the roof doors. I opened the them and breathed in the fresh air.
This was Clint's favourite place.
It was one place that he was free in his eyes.
He uses it to fight and relax at the same time.
I wish I had a place like that.
My thoughts returned to what had just happened.
He feels the same way about me that I feel about him!
I could be with him...we could be together at last...
No! Snap out of it! You may love each other, but S.H.I.E.L.D won't allow it.
It's against the rules.
I wish they didn't exist.
7am
10 hours.
It has been 10 hours.
How has he been like this for so long?
He had better wake up soon otherwise I am going to go insane.
I was lying next to him on the bed, his face opposite mine.
"You had better wake up soon Clint or I swear to God I am going to kill you myself."
Everyone else had gone to sleep outside the room, but I stayed up with my partner.
I was fed up.
I wanted him back.
If the drug lords weren't dead, then I would be after them in a shot.
"Come back to me. Please." I said pressing my forehead against his.
I was begging now?
I'm definitely compromised.
He's changed me so much.
His head moved against mine and I pulled back a bit.
Oh my god, is he waking up?
"Clint? Clint, are you awake?" I asked him.
He opened his eyes slowly and said "Tasha? What's going on?"
"Thank God you're alright." I said hugging him sideways on the bed.
He wrapped his hands around my waist and said "Of course i'm alright. I'm with you aren't I?"
I breathed in his scent and sighed.
"You were gone. You weren't moving. You weren't talking and I missed you so much." I whispered into his ear.
The truth was blurting out of my mouth before I knew what was happening. I think it was just the sheer relief of him being alive that brought on the sudden change in emotion.
Clint was back.
My Clint.
And I love him. How was I going to tell him?
I pulled back and stared into his eyes.
I stroked the back of his head and he placed one of the hands that was on my hip, onto the side of my face.
"There's something I need to tell you Clint." I said.
Come on. You can do this.
"Over the past day I have been thinking about what happened to you and how...how much I...how much..."
His hand, that was on my cheek, began to stroke my face. My breathing began to get quicker.
"I heard you." he said.
"What?"
"I heard you talking to Stark. I heard you talking to me. I felt you kiss my forehead."
My mouth fell openly slightly and I felt like I couldn't breath, let alone talk back to him.
"I want you to know that I feel the same way about you." he said smiling. "I want to be with you. I don't care about what S.H.I.E.L.D thinks or anyone else for that matter."
He put his forehead against mine.
"I love you Natasha." he whispered.
I smiled and whispered "I love you too."
Our smiles grew wider and we wrapped our arms around each others necks.
We leant in together and our lips met.
I felt so alive. This was better than I ever imagined it to be.
It felt so good to finally be against him.
I put my hand on his back to push him closer to me.
He moaned as I deepened the kiss and wrapped my legs around him.
I turned us over, so I was on top of him.
I continued to kiss him as his hands rubbed up and down my back.
Screw protocol. This was amazing.
My hands spread across his chest and I knew that I didn't want to leave him. Ever.
I pushed myself against him and my hands went to the hem of his shirt.
As I began to pull up his shirt, a loud cough interrupted us.
I span around, my legs still straddling him, and saw all the Avengers, Hill, Pepper and Fury standing there smirking. Even Fury.
"Do you mind not shagging on my medical beds please?" Stark asked.
I scoffed and said "Nothing was going to happen Stark." I said.
"Nothing?" Clint asked me, eyebrows raised.
I turned back around to him, went down down his ear and whispered "Yet."
I grabbed his head and smashed his lips against mine, weaving my fingers through his hair.
"Come on, guys! I will give you a room together and you can fondue in there all day, but not in medical! Just no!" Stark shouted.
He pulled back and said "I'm gonna kill him one day."
I just smiled and pulled my legs off Clint.
We both sat up cross legged facing the other Avengers.
"Director Fury, I'm sorry about the circumstances of this meeting." I said glancing back at Clint.
"I understand if you want to take us off active duty, Sir." Clint said.
Fraternisation is forbidden. Stupid rules.
"Why would I want to do that? You are the finest team that S.H.I.E.L.D has...and I have gained £30 off Coulson from this." he said with a straight face.
"You had a bet on them?" Banner asked.
Stark didn't seem that surprised and said smiling "Did you win?"
Fury just smirked slightly as a form of answer and left the room with a nod.
"Anyway," I began. "why did you decide to interrupt us?"
"We saw on the screens outside that Clint's bpm had gone up dramatically, so we thought that we would investigate, but obviously we now know what caused the increase in heart rate and that there was nothing to worry about." Hill said, fighting, and failing, to keep down the smile that was forming on her lips.
"So, are you guys gonna leave now or?" Clint asked.
"Of course Barton. Come on Stark." Steve said pulling Tony out of the room by his collar.
"DON'T YOU DARE HAVE SEX ON THAT MEDICAL BED!" Stark said as he was dragged down the corridor.
The door shut and I turned around to face Clint. We both still had our legs crossed and we weren't speaking to each other. Just looking into each other's eyes, almost analysing each other, contemplating whether this was reality or not.
After a couple of minutes, Clint spoke up "So, how long?"
I knew what he meant.
"I don't even know when it started. It feels like forever though. You?"
"Natasha, it was ever since I first saw you. I have always been falling for you."
He came forward and rested his forehead against mine.
"Always." he repeated and then placed another kiss onto my lips.
Hope you liked that! It has been in my head for a while. :) Please review! x