To be honest, I don't have much memories of Before. Not much at all.

I couldn't remember my appearance, nor even my gender. I could not recall my parents, because no matter how hard I tried I felt nothing but a brief burst of fondness and longing in my chest.

And perhaps most horribly of all, I couldn't even remember my own name.

(Beep . . . Beep . . . )

But I could remember the tears.

I could remember wrenching sobs and a shaking hand carding through my hair. I could remember the soothing classical music playing from a music player.

(Beep― . . .)

And I could remember the pain.

I could remember the intense, bone-crushing pain that seared through my body. I could remember how my limbs burned with the ferocity of a thousand suns, how my head pounded in tandem with my heart and how everything hurt.

I could remember―

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Light. That was the first thing I became aware of.

A bright, blinding flash of light that left a permanent glare in my retinas. And just as suddenly as it came, the brightness disappeared before fuzzy sounds began to slowly flicker into existence.

I blinked up at the hazy image of the smiling doctor standing beside me, pen poised over his clipboard as he asked me questions in a soothing tone. Behind him, the nurses were in a flurry as they rushed around checking my heart monitor and IV drip.

". . . Eijun-kun! How do you feel? You finally woke up after . . ."

―I couldn't remember how I died.

Chapter 1

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"Ei-chan?"

My eyes flickered open slowly, sleep still determined in sneaking its tendrils into my lethargic limbs. Reaching up lazily, I gave my crusted eyes a good rub before I deemed myself moderately awake and thus capable of looking up.

"Mm?"

A gentle smile played on the lips of my aunt as she leaned closer and tousled my hair. Pouting at the childish treatment I was receiving, I playfully swatted her hands away before throwing my covers off and stretching.

"Good morning, Auntie!" I said enthusiastically, even as I suppressed a yawn. My aunt cheerfully responded before she left my bedroom, leaving me to do the duty of making myself presentable for company.

Bounding swiftly off my bed, I shivered slightly when my feet touched the cool floor. Why was it so cold already? Sighing softly, I quickly fished out my slippers before making my way to the wash room to begin my ritual of freshening up.

Turning on the sink, I rinsed my toothbrush before looking up. And like every time this had happened before, time itself seemed to stop as I took in the foreign face staring back at me on the other side of the mirror.

Fluffy brown hair, a shade or two lighter than dark chocolate. Much lighter coloured eyes, almost caramel in the shade and a pretty amber in sunlight. Round cheeks still laden with baby fat and a sweet smile.

Male.

Was this really me? Or was I actually another soul stuck in an innocent child's body?

"Ei-chan!" My aunt called. "Wakana-chan is here already!"

Blanching, all my thoughts were swept out of my mind as I immediately began brushing my teeth. Making Wakana wait meant a world of pain and nagging that I was definitely not ready for so early in the morning. Quickly finishing up and giving my hair a speedy comb, I changed into my uniform before rushing downstairs.

"Sorry Wakana-san!" I yelped as I skidded to a stop in front of her, ignoring my aunt's soft giggle as she handed me my bento box and my backpack.

Wakana, my supposed best friend, rolled her eyes ―hiding the slight pain that had resurfaced when I had addressed her so formally― before dragging me outside to a whole gaggle of boys who stood waiting on the stairs. Before long, I was dragged into a loud conversation with everyone as we amiably chatted on our walk to school.

. . . It was fun, and it felt normal.

I couldn't have thanked them enough.

My name was Sawamura Eijun. I was eight, lived in Nagano, and a student of Akagi Elementary.

I also had amnesia. Apparently, I was a victim of a car crash three months ago, and only woke up after a two month coma.

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Everything felt so familiar, but also so foreign. I just didn't understand.

Were they familiar because some level of my subconscious could still remember some of my memories? That was the most probable answer.

But no, it didn't feel right . . .

My gut clenched.

That wasn't the answer, because it just wasn't right.

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A coma and a concussion. That was all I had been inflicted with. I had no broken bones, nor any damaged organs.

In that aspect, I was way luckier than my 'parents'. After all, they never woke up . . . and were now buried six feet under.

After I woke up, it began a swirl of official documents and suited lawyers. My . . . mother's ―was she really my mother?― younger twin sister, my Auntie, was the one who ended up taking me in. She grieved terribly for her twin, and her husband had totally supported her idea of adopting me.

I was grateful to them. Auntie Sawamura was sweet and kind. Uncle Sawamura looked scary at first glance (because I mean look at his hair) but he was a softie too.

Grandpa was the best though. He was the only one, save Wakana, who never seemed as if he was walking on eggshells when he interacted with me. Because by now, the whole of Nagano knew of Sawamura Apple Farm's new amnesic child. Even strangers I meet on the streets treated me as if they were talking to fragile glass! It was almost infuriating.

". . . so maybe . . . Eijun?"

Snapping out of my thoughts, I looked up to see Wakana staring at me, looking a smidge concerned. On the other hand, Nobu and everyone else were already flitting around me, looking like worried headless chickens.

Resisting the urge to sigh, I gave them a small grin. "Sorry, what did you say?"

Wakana's eyebrows furrowed, but after a glance between my straining smile and our friends' increasingly frantic hand flails, the girl seemed to have decided to give me a break.

"I was telling you about baseball. You really wanted to try it before! And the doctor said you can go back to physical activities in a month or two . . ."

I blinked as I listened to Wakana's enthusiastic chatter. Hmm.

Baseball, huh?

Again, it was something that felt both foreign but familiar to me. On one hand, music ―for some reason― called to me while I didn't have much interest in any sports. On the other, my limbs felt like they were shaking in anticipation ever since Wakana started on this topic.

So . . . should I do baseball or music?

Nobu laughed as his eyes shone, gesturing widely to me as he did an imitation of a 'pitcher'. All around me, my sweet and understanding friends looked unbelievably happy and passionate as they shouted out the positions they wanted and how they couldn't wait to bring their 'Ace' to the mound.

But . . .

Soft classical music wafted through the air. Violin, it was a weeping violin that was tugging my heart strings―

. . . Well, I was currently a blank canvas. I could add 'greedy' to my lacklustre personality, couldn't I?

"Then when I'm allowed to, let's make a baseball team, guys!" I said with a big smile as I watched my friends cheer.

Because really, why would I have to pick between two things that both made me happy?

"Good job, Eijun-kun! So, do you like the new fingering or . . ."

I started violin lessons that very week. Uncle Sawamura was ecstatic when I said I wanted music lessons, though he had deflated a bit when he realized I wanted to learn the violin and not rock and roll singing.

Auntie Sawamura cooed over me happily at my sudden interest while Grandpa looked a bit disbelieving and very much sceptical. However, it wasn't long before I was in Nagano's largest music store, picking out my three-quarters violin.

Coincidentally, the manager of the store was a violin teacher and just happened to be in the store that day. After helping me with the long and tedious task of picking out a violin, he offered music lessons at a discounted price ―mostly because of the cost of the violin I wanted.

(And let's just say it was expensive. Uncle had paled and Grandpa looked almost unwilling before he caved under the combined pouts of me and Auntie.

. . . In any case, I still felt guilty.)

"It's good," I said with a small smile, my fingers already soundlessly flitting across the fingerboard again.

On the bright side, I took to violin like a fish to water. Breezing through the beginner grades, I left everyone amazed at how fast I picked the instrument up. But it all felt so natural, almost as if I have played the delicate violin for years.

―Was this really me? Or was I actually another soul stuck in an innocent child's body?―

And as for my other interest, well . . .

As soon as the doctor gave me the okay, my friends dragged me to the nearest sports store. Each of us began buying equipment and some baseball books, and it wasn't long before we were trying out our new toys.

"Eijun, catch!"

I was the pitcher.

Spinning around, I grabbed the sloppily thrown ball out of the air with only minimal difficulty.

And I loved it.

I loved the wind in my hair as I go through my wind-up. I loved the feeling of the ball in my hand, and the rush of adrenaline as I snapped back my wrist to send the ball flying.

And I especially loved the satisfying smack the baseball made as it ended up in my catcher's mitt.

. . . Granted, that didn't happen much. My control was absolutely atrocious, and according to all my friends who attempted to catch for me, the ball seemed to move randomly even after it left my hand.

Moving ball, moving ball . . . now why did that sound so familiar?

But we had fun together. Our small school supported us fully, even though our team lost almost every single match. I became the ever reliable Captain (Wakana, our manager, had a good laugh over this) of the small team and despite all the losses, I was happy.

We were happy.

Years passed.

One year, two.

Three years, five.

At fourteen, I had a lithe figure. Puberty served me well, though I still wasn't the tallest guy on the block. On the other hand, due to my laziness I rarely cut my hair and just left it long. Now, brown silky locks cascaded down my back, though I always braided it so my hair would never bother me during training. To my displeasure though, the baby fat hadn't disappeared from my cheeks and my eyes were big and as childish as ever.

Put that all together and I could probably pass as a girl. Or at least an effeminate guy.

As I grew older, I became extremely good at playing violin, to the point where my violin teacher wondered if I was a genius. My grades also became impeccable, much to the surprise of my friends; apparently I had never been good at school before my . . . accident. Now however, I didn't even need to study and I could do most tests without any struggles.

As for baseball . . .

My friends, well, they didn't become much better at baseball. For all their enthusiasm, I soon learned that they were only so enthusiastic because of me, because of how much I had loved the sport.

I truly had the greatest friends ever.

But though I began to steadily improve as the pitcher, it meant nothing as my team-mates continued to fumble with the ball. We still lost every single match, despite all my poor friends' best efforts.

I didn't really mind losing, though. It was fun playing with my friends, and I was already happy enough to be able to play baseball in the first place. I looked forward to playing with my friends in high school, and who knows? Maybe we would get better enough to make a stand in the tournaments.

But then, in the cusp of my final year in middle school, everything changed.

And unknown to me at the time, it all started with Akagi Baseball Team's last official game and my last pitch as their wayward Captain.

". . ."

I stared.

A pretty lady with glasses was sitting at our table.

. . . That was not something that happened every single day.

"Um, hello there!" I said loudly as I gave a stiff bow. "Are you looking for my parents? I could go and get them if you want―"

"Sawamura Eijun," Pretty Glasses Lady said sharply. Immediately my next words died a quick death on my tongue.

"U-Um, yes?"

"Nice to meet you," Scary Lady said with a wide smile as she slid forward a business card. "I am Takashima, the assistant coach of the Seidou High School Baseball Club."

. . .

Seidou? Wait, that sounded really familiar . . .

"The other day, I watched the match with Narushima Junior High, and it seems to me that you have unusual untapped potential."

My mind blanked. Wait a minute, was I actually getting scouted? Sawamura Eijun, getting scouted by Seidou High School? Seidou High School . . .

Wait a moment. Wasn't Seidou―

"Seidou will love to have you, Sawamura-kun."

―part of that famous baseball manga I used to read? Come to think of it, wasn't the protagonist of that manga named Sawamura Eijun . . .?

I stared at the pretty lady, Takashima Rei, with wide eyes.

Oh shit.

How did I miss this for over five years?!

AN: This was supposed to be for the Self Insert Week, but well, this didn't happen in time lmao.

I've rarely seen any SI!fics in the DnA fandom, so I wanted to try my hand at one. The SI in this fic used to be a top university student who had a passion for violin. As Eijun, however, he won't remember much of his past life except for the skills he learned and the plot for Daiya no Ace. If anything, it could be a 'Eijun who can tell the future fic' haha. It's crossposted on Ao3!

Please enjoy and leave me your thoughts! /winks/