Author's Note:
Before we start there is something we need to understand, we need to make sure we are on the same page. If we don't then the things that happen may confuse you greatly and not make much sense!
The thing is, and this is going to sound completely strange and ridiculous, that some of the things we "know" to be pretend, imaginary and fake are actually real. I personally have seen some of these things, nowhere near all but a faint glimpse of what is out there hidden from modern society. I have seen things that could never happen, I have seen things and objects reveal to be alive and almost human (beyond human actually, more god like sometimes). I have seen another's heart, mind and soul on several occasions and can look back whenever I wish.
Most importantly, I have met people, people thought to be fantasy. I have talked with them, lived with them and even saved by them (sometimes they cause it, but that doesn't matter right now.)
Let's backtrack before you get confused, it all started almost a year ago in about 2 months. I was like all of you, I didn't believe in things like magic and miracles. The most magical thing in my life was the fact that me and my sister hadn't sent my father into an insane asylum yet! I mean we had been pretty awful; we always got into trouble (in my case sometimes with the law…) and were pretty bratty. Then things changed. She came and fixed it all, I guess you could say. Then again, when you look at it this way, we fixed her too in the process. We were all broken, it's just one of us wouldn't admit it (Not Me!). But by the end of they year we were all better. It wasn't a family member, or maybe my dad's girlfriend/fiancé, we didn't even know her until she was hired (Ok, that's not entirely true, I had met her once, but I don't think it should count when it's only a few hours after being born.). But I can guarantee that you won't believe me at first.
How do I say this? Well, growing up we are introduced to an array of characters like Winnie the Pooh, Snow-White, The Little Mermaid, Woody & Buzz, the works…
So if that's the case for you then you most likely have at least heard of this person. So I guess I cannot beat around the bush any longer, So I'll Just say it, Has anybody ever heard of Mary Poppins? Most likely, but there is a good chance that you don't remember the story well. That's okay, because we don't need to know THAT story for mine. So unless you are COMPLETELY stupid you probably understand what I'm getting at. So yeah, that person was THE nanny. The one everyone knows. It's kinda strange to think about it that way. It certainly came as a shock to us when we found out (Us being me and my sister). But no matter HOW unbelievable it is, that still doesn't take away from the fact that it is 100% true!
Now it's been almost two years since then. We have changed a hell of a lot since she first arrived and left, and even more the second time. Those of you who have followed along my blogs at . know all about that first time, but now it's time to share the adventures of the Second Appearance. If you never read the first one, you may want to… but you don't need to because everything you need to know will be explained.
~ S.A.B.
The Part of the Story in the beginning where I try to lure you into the story and make it sound interesting and get you to read the rest, but usually just is pretty vague and confusing so the only reason you finish reading is to make sense of it.
Otherwise known as the:
Prologue
It has been 7 days since she left us again.
It has been 7 nights since she put us to bed.
But, it has been 3 days since My Dad Learned Everything
3 Days since We Openly Discussed Her.
2 Days since she came up in conversation casually.
2 Days Since I started writing this all down.
1 Day since I Finished writing
1 Minute Since I Started Writing the List
And no time has passed since the last time we thought about her, missed her and wished she could stay.
Lists help me sort out things sometimes. This isn't one of those times though.
I lived it all, wrote it down and have recited it numerously these past few days and even I don't understand the things that happened. So I'll make another list to help shed some light… maybe…
I almost died twice
I fought with Marianna too many times to count
I was grounded BECAUSE of Marianna 15 times
I won 1 recording contract
I was almost murdered once
I wrote 15 songs
I got 1 boyfriend
My dad got one fiancé
My dad arrested one fiancé
My Grandma kept us in check daily
My Dad/Marianna overreacted about 5 times
I reunited with 1 cousin
I had (Unknown amount) of Adventures/Experiences
Nope, still can't process it. It is strange because when it happened I didn't question it. But looking back at everything makes me confused and unable to make sense out of it. It's all Marianna's fault.
Marianna and her stupid bird. (Ok, maybe it wasn't the Bird's fault completely… but he DID add to the trouble… we'll discuss this later…) Still, Marianna was to blame… wasn't she? I mean she's the one who had me do all that stuff, and made me lie and cover up for her all the time. I was the one who always got punished.
But then again, it was my choice to lie and cover up for her. I didn't have to after all. And Maybe it wouldn't have gotten so out of hand if I hadn't let my unhappiness boil up inside of me. Then I also got my priorities mixed up and let things go out of control… Still, she shouldn't have asked me to do this stuff. But then, I should have told her I didn't like it as well.
Maybe it's not any of our faults; the obvious blame goes to Tamara clearly. God just typing that name freaks the hell out of me now. I mean she did kidnap, drug, attempt to murder, and try to steal our money. So maybe we should blame everything on her!
Still is that really fair, (I know I'm trying to be fair to a murder… crazy right?) we chose to be ignorant for so long. We didn't say anything to dad or share concerns. Plus, it technically is my and Marianna's fault that she was able to do this stuff in the first place. We made it easy to turn us against each other.
So is it really mine and Marianna's fault after all? If that is the right the answer, why don't I still understand? Maybe it's Dad's fault. It's easy to blame parents I find. Dad should have been more aware of the happenings in his house, he also should have known by know that Marianna would NEVER do anything (intentionally!) to hurt us. (Because she has caused me plenty of pain and frequent hospital trips before). He should have known that something wasn't right with Christianna. He should have thought things through and realized that in no possible way would I have been able to cause any of the things that happened which I was punished for.
God, he should have been able to put the pieces together! I thought he'd seen the movie, she should have been like "Wait, that seems familiar…"( I wasn't like that when I first learned about her because I hadn't ever seen it before that time).
I know Christianna and Grandmother are innocent, mostly. I mean, Chrissy shouldn't have been so easy to have betray us and Grandmother could have made a lot of things easier if she had told us that she knew.
Maybe nobody's innocent and nobody completely to blame. Maybe we are all apart of what happened and we all acted equally in the chaos that unfolded. We were all equal parts of it.
Maybe…
Maybe it's not my place to put blame on somebody and decide their innocence. Maybe I have no right to. Maybe you, the reader will have to decide for yourself who is to blame or if any of us are to blame.
I suppose the best place to start is at the beginning. Not of summer, but the day when it all began.
Almost 9 months ago.
Last week of august, Chrissy and I were at home that day because daddy had made us finish (and by finish he meant start) unpacking our new room in the nursery of #17 Cherry-Tree Lane…