Brendan rolled over, his eyelids fluttering open. His vision adjusting to the light as he saw the outline of the man he was falling in love with. Walker was peacefully asleep, his chest rising and falling as he slept soundly, his cheeks a little flustered. No doubt from a naughty dream he was having. Brendan was captivated. He'd never been this content to just watch another human being in such a vulnerable state and not ruin it. He took a quiet happy sigh and let his eyes fumble shut, snatch a last look at his lover.

Brendan's eyelids rolled open heavily. He'd not slept well, he'd stayed at the club far too late and drank far too much. He was on his back, his mind was fuzzy, his mouth dry. It tasted like the bottom of a bird cage, his nose scrunching up and he swallowed to get some sort of moisture, attempting aimlessly to rid himself of the taste. He looked at the ceiling. The same ceiling he stared up at each morning he woke, the same thought clogging him memory. Walker was gone and he was heartbroken.

Brendan would relive the moment over and over in his mind. He would tell himself again and again that it would be easier if Walker was dead, at least then he would have some sort of closure, but this, this was like torture. Knowing he was out there somewhere, but not knowing where was pure agony. He closed his eyes again and took a deep breath before releasing it slowly through his nose.

The memory was as clear as day in his mind, constantly on his mind. It was a couple of weeks after Connor had gone back to Dublin. It had all gone better than Brendan had ever expected or imagined. It was on the news the day after the club incident that Connor had been killed in a shoot out with police when he tried to execute a cop in Dublin Port who was attempting to arrest him. Brendan had always known that Connor was a sneaky bastard, so he wasn't surprised that Connor had travelled by ferry rather than flown, but that didn't matter, Connor got what was coming to him. As for his 'men' well they'd all been rounded up and arrested.

Here it was, once again playing like a film on endless repeat. Brendan waking up on that bright and sunny morning, not a care in the world. He was falling in love, he was happy, and he was rich. Richer than he'd ever been. He looked next to him to find he was alone. It didn't alarm him that Walker wasn't next to him, he'd noticed that Walker's sleeping pattern was as irregular as his own. Instead he chose to relax back into his pillow and close his eyes again, comfortable in his own world.

After a while he became alarmed at the absence of noise. No running water, no flushing toilet, no whistling kettle, no clanging of cups, dishes. Nothing. Just silence. Brendan's eyes darted open as he quickly sprang up into a sitting position. He threw back the covers of his bed and flung his legs over the side, on his feet in double quick time. As he hurried around the bed, his eyes caught sight of something on the bedside table. He froze to the spot, standing at the foot of his bed in nothing but his black boxers, his crucifix dangling amongst his chest hair. He eyed it suspiciously as he edged closer, his every step as if he were in slow motion. It was a letter and his name was on the front.

He picked it up, his hands becoming sweaty and shaky. He sat on the edge of the bed as he held the letter in a manner as if he was cradling a tiny fragile baby bird. His chest tightened, his mouth went dry, tears welled in his eyes, he knew what the letter was about without even opening it. He felt his cheeks flush at the sheer embarrassment of he - Brendan Brady - getting teary over a letter. He slowly opened the sheet of A4 paper and began to read.

Brendan.

I'm sorry. I can't do this. It's all too much, too soon. I need time.

I hope you understand.

Walker

The words cut into Brendan's heart like a hot knife through butter. He didn't realise that he was holding his breath until his chest started to ache. He gasped the air into his lungs, appreciating the feeling as his head went dizzy. A mix of a lack of oxygen and utter disbelief. He'd never thought that Walker would leave him. Not like that. He re-read the letter over and over until each and every word was imprinted on his brain.

He didn't have a clue as to how long he had been sat there. He'd read the letter to the point where all the words blurred, becoming a mish-mash. Yeah he admitted that the start of his relationship with Walker had not been conventional, far from it in fact. After all how many relationships start with a punch, a false declaration of love, a public display of affection, a fight, a kid getting killed, an explosion, a con, a beating, a near death experience, a passionate fuck, a trip to the hospital, a secret midnight return, a lot of accusing looks, confinement, a vengeful drug baron, another beating, a near rape, a well timed interruption, a rude interruption and a revelation. Brendan was sure they would all feature on a list of what not to do in a relationship list. He couldn't blame Walker for wanting out. Brendan wasn't the easiest of people to have a relationship with. Just ask Ste.

The thought of his behaviour in his relationship with the Deli owner made his blood run cold, a shudder running down his spine. With that he suddenly felt cold, noticing he was half naked. Brendan took a deep breath, his head felt heavy, his body was tired. Everything since the club incident was going so well, he just couldn't understand it. Only that night they had passionate sex, right there in the now empty and cold bed Brendan was perched on. He was confused. What had happened for Walker to just up sticks and leave, not even saying it to his face. Had he done something? He couldn't recall anything. Had he been too rough? Well, things between them was always a little rough, but they both liked that. Had he said something? He couldn't remember, nothing stuck out. His head began to pound. He rubbed his eyes with his fingers and thumb. This was all too much.

He found himself reliving the night before. He and Walker were in the club. He was sat at his desk, while Walker was out in the bar, serving. Now on reflection it occurred to him how reluctant Walker was to be in the office, the whole near rape had shuck him up more than he had let on. When Brendan had gently enquired about it, he had simply smiled and said he was fine. How could Brendan argue otherwise, without it turning into a fight. After closing Joel had sulked off to spend the night at Theresa's and Cheryl hadn't been seen all evening, leaving Brendan and Walker alone to tidy and lock up. Brendan unsurprisingly hadn't offered to help Walker while he picked up glass after abandoned glass throughout the club, instead he remained tucked away in his office.

Brendan was so engrossed in the newspaper that he'd brought from Price Slice earlier, that he didn't notice Walker standing in the doorway to the office. Walker gave a little cough to draw Brendan's attention. He looked up and their eyes locked.

'I'm done.' Walker spoke first.

Brendan gave a slight nod, before standing up. He pulled his suit jacket from the back of the chair and pulled it on. He strode around the desk towards the door. Walker left the doorway, followed by Brendan who flipped the switch as he left, and pulled the door close behind him. He smirked to himself as he watched Walker in front of him, admiring his arse, tight in his jeans. As if he had heard Brendan's admiration out loud Walker stopped and turned to face him. Catching sight of Brendan's leering. A small smile crept across Walker's lips. Neither spoke, instead they just shared a lingering lust fuelled look. Walker was stepping backwards, his hands firmly shoved in his coat pockets, oh how Brendan loved and hated that stupid coat he was always wearing, zipped to the chin. Loved how it was like the first layer of a pass the parcel, hiding what's beneath. Hated how it hid at the very same time, leaving no sly glimpse of flesh, no little temptation.

They quickly left the club. Brendan locking the door as they shared snatched glances. Lust and want moving them with speed from the club to the flat. Soon they found themselves in the sanctuary of Brendan's room. Once the door was closed and the world shut out, it was just them and their desires, their needs and each other.

Brendan grabbed hold of Walker by the coat and almost a bit too aggressively slammed him against the door, causing it to creak loudly at the sudden force. Walker gasped for breath, his eyes widened as Brendan pounced, seizing Walker's lips with his own, stealing his breath. Their lips were devouring the others. Their tongues darting in and out the others mouth, all wet and warm. They both groaned at the rising pleasure. Brendan's knuckles turned white, he was holding onto Walker's coat that tight, as if he never wanted to let go. Walker's hands were holding onto Brendan's shoulders, his fingers digging in.

Brendan pulled back with an audible intake of breath, his eyes locked on Walker's bee-stung lips. Walker was panting hard as he leaned back against the door. Brendan let go of Walker and took a step back, not taking his eyes off Walker as he slipped off his jacket. He tossed it onto the floor away from him. Walker reached for the zipper on his coat, nestled beneath his chin. Brendan reached out, placing his hand on Walker's. Brendan wanted to unzip Walker's coat, he liked the anticipation he felt as he slowly lowered the zip, watching as Walker's pupils dilated. His cock twitched in his trousers. He didn't want to take it slow, he wanted Walker and he wanted him right now.

Brendan grabbed hold of the zipper and pulled slowly at first as he passed Walker's throat, gaining speed as he went, quickly the zip was undone. Brendan took hold of the material of the kaki coat and pulled Walker towards him, so he was now standing. Brendan pushed the coat over Walker's shoulders and it fell to the floor. Brendan took a few steps back, Walker didn't move. Their eyes still fixed on one another. The air of anticipation, lust, want, need was overwhelming. It was electric. Brendan raised his hands and undid the cufflink on his one sleeve, before undoing the other, both time letting the sterling silver squares fall to the floor. Walker gulped, he was completely turned on and watching the Irish man begin to strip was just adding to the feeling burning inside of him.

Walker reached for the hem of his thin black jumper and pulled it upwards, guiding it over his toned torso. That moment of blind exposure causing his breath to hitch as he pulled the material over his head. Brendan licked his lips in excitement as he scanned Walkers chest, the smoothness, the defined muscles, his nipples. Walker threw his jumper down at his feet.

Now it was Brendan's turn. He lifted his fingers to the first done up button - half way down his chest - and undid it, before moving to the next one and the one after that. Quickly all of the buttons on his shirt were undone. Pulling the fabric from his trousers, he opened the shirt wide, giving Walker a tantalising glimpse of his own toned chest, the covering of hair and the silver of his crucifix. Brendan shrugged the dark blue shirt from his shoulders and let it fall from his arms, landing in a crumpled heap on the floor at his feet.

Walker could feel his erection pushing against the tight fabric of his jeans, it was becoming uncomfortable. He moved his hands to his belt, quickly pulling it through the loop on his jeans. He pulled the leather back on itself, hardly even hearing the straining of the material as he undid the buckle. Making even shorter work of the button and fly on his jeans. He pushed the material open, allowing Brendan to see his black boxer briefs and a smattering of dark blonde public hair, leading a trail to his belly button.

Brendan made his next move. The yearning was growing inside of him. He undid his belt in a flash, his fingers moving like lightening. He pushed his thumbs inside the waistband of his black trousers and pushed them down to the ground, they gathered around his ankles. Walker looked at Brendan's obvious bulge in his tight black boxers and felt his breath catch in the back of his throat. Brendan awkwardly kicked off his shoes, wobbling a little due to the location of his trousers, before discarding them into a pile. He now stood semi naked, proud and completely aroused in front of Walker. A slight smug expression on his lips. Challenging Walker to equal him.

More than up to the challenge Walker crouched down and was all fingers and thumbs as he undid the laces on his boots, It was times like these when he wished he didn't wear boots, they only hold things up. Now clear of his boots and socks, Walker ridded himself of his jeans and stood back up facing Brendan. His eyes lingered on Brendan's own trail of pubic hair from his boxers, up to his belly button.

Brendan was brought out of his memory by the ringing of his mobile. He blinked and looked across to the bedside table. The alarm was going off. He hoisted himself out of bed and picked up the phone and turned the alarm off. He went to put it back down, but hesitated. He opened the photo album and scrolled down the photo's. Stopping when he came across his favourite photo. It was of Walker, caught completely unawares as he leaned on the bar, a shy smile playing on his lips, a wistful look on his face. Totally gorgeous.

Having showered, dressed and drank a mug of black coffee, full of too much sugar Brendan was as ready as he could be to face the world. He was wearing a black suit, black waistcoat, red shirt and black tie. Despite his mood, he still made the effort every now and again, even if it was more to just appease Cheryl. He strutted over to the club, not uttering a single word to anyone. A face like thunder, dark rings under his eyes. He pulled the door open, strode up the stairs and straight into the office, not even acknowledging Joel.

Joel had had enough of Brendan's never ending mood. Ever since Walker had done one, he was even more unbearable. It was like walking on eggshells whenever he was around. Besides the fact that he would turn up when he wanted and when questioned he would bellow that he could do what the fuck he wanted as he owned the club. Joel had made the mistake the first time of answering back and telling him that he was only a partner. He quickly learnt never to say it again when he was being dangled over the railings outside by Brendan who had a venomous expression on his face and hate in his eyes.

Not to mention that he spent most of his time locked away in the office drinking, and when he did emerge he would scare away customers. Joel had had it. It needed to be sorted, and he knew that the only person he was likely to listen to was Cheryl. Walking from behind the bar, while pulling on his leather jacket Joel went over to the office.

'I'm going out.' he muttered as he saw Brendan sitting at the desk, paperwork in hand.

He didn't acknowledge him, nothing. Joel sighed and shook his head as he sauntered over to the door. He'd only just got to the bottom of the steps when he saw Cheryl, walking towards the florist.

'Cheryl.' he shouted out.

She turned to look over at Joel and greeted him with a warm smile as he walked up to her.

'Hey sweetheart. What you doing? Why aren't you at the club?' she enquired.

Joel shook his head 'Huh, what do you think?' he scoffed.

'Brendan?' she asked.

Joel nodded. 'Do you have five, we need to sort this out. His mood is getting bad for business. He's scaring customers away. It needs to stop.'

'Ok love. Let's go get a coffee.' Cheryl smiled over the true concern in her face as she glanced up at the club.

Brendan placed the paperwork on the desk and sat back in his chair. Resting his hands in his lap, he closed his eyes as he rested his head back. His mind instantly went to Walker. He was desperate to know where he was, to know he was safe. But mostly importantly, why? Why he left. He sighed, every minute was haunted by Walker. He heard the door downstairs bang closed followed by footsteps on the stairs. Despite hearing the footsteps get closer and closer he didn't open his eyes or lift his head, nope he stayed just the way he was. Without a care. When the person entered the office and stop, now Brendan decided to open his eyes and lift his head. The bit of colour drained from his face, his mouth fell open, his eyes were wild.

'Walker?' Brendan muttered in surprise.

'Hello Brendan.' was the confident reply.