Disclaimer: I do not own anything.


A/N: This is my first one-shot ever so I really do hope you'll like it.
I'm sorry for any kind of errors and every grammar mistakes but my mother tongue isn't English so, yeah sorry. lol Anyway I want to give a huge thanks my beta welovelea1. I know that you were like super busy but you've found the time to help me anyway so thank you so much. You're the best. :)


I'm losing myself
Trying to compete
With everyone else
Instead of just being me


"Hi Mercedes. My name is Rachel Barbra Berry and I'm in my sophomore year at NYADA and hopefully once out of college, I'll be singing on a Broadway stage." She said crossing her fingers. "Ever since I attended high school I always wore knee socks and sweaters with animals drawn on top." She giggled pointing at her clothing. "Personally I've always loved them, but I don't think that this look "works" here in New York. I really wish that people to like me or even just to appreciate me as I am but it never happens." A hint of sadness felt out from her voice. "Boys don't look at me like they look at the other girls and, I know it might be sound crazy but, omitting the little flirt with a boy of the enemy glee club in high school, I've never had a real boyfriend."

Truth be told having a boyfriend wasn't exactly her priority but more years passed and more she felt like the need to have someone by her side. Someone to celebrate the roles obtained with. Someone to lean on in hard times. Just, someone.

"There's a boy in my dance class named Brody. He was the only guy who've ever talked to me when I was a freshman and I think he's the only guy who even knows that I exist and perhaps, with a few small changes, he might even start to feel something for me. Actually he was the first to tell me to change. He said that no one would ever be interested in me if I keep dressing like a child. That I wasn't a real New Yorker until I got my first makeover. I still think that's probably the stupidest thing that I've ever heard but, I just- I don't know."

She watched as the little red light flashed that not knowing what else to add. She felt the tears forming in her eyes without even knowing why. She had planned to cry to get her compassion, cry on command was one of her specialties, but she didn't expect to cry in earnest because of this story. "I-I don't want to sound desperate but, please Mercedes, help me."

Rachel finally paused the video and took the camera. She couldn't believe she just did that. Had she really made a video in which she asked for an expert to help her with her love life?

Years ago she would never have thought of being in this situation. She didn't want to be labeled as "the loser" also in college. The girl who nobody notices. The girl who never gets invited on a date. She wanted people to like her for who she was but, apparently, the guy who would have loved her for her, hadn't arrived yet. And she was tired. Tired of waiting for the right guy. A guy who might never come.

This was the main reason why she decided to seek help from Mercedes Jones, the expert of love relationships.
She was always confident, even though she knew she wasn't a classic beauty. She didn't want to change, but perhaps only in that way Brody would have liked her.
Sometimes she didn't even understand why she wanted so much his attention. He wasn't exactly the "perfect guy." His ego was even bigger than Rachel's and furthermore he thought to be the best in everything he did.

So why change for a guy like him?

Rachel has set this question a million times before getting the same answer: "Because he's the only guy who'll ever speak to me. Even if it's only to remind me how good and attractive he is."
Before having second thoughts Rachel sent the video hoping to have made the right decision.

After all, what could possibly go wrong?


"Hello?"

"Hi, am I speaking to Rachel Berry?"

It was a Tuesday as others when an unknown voice was heard on the other end of the phone and even though Rachel had the impression of having already heard it somewhere, she couldn't remember where.

"Yes, this is she. May I know who is this?" She asked politely.

"Hello again, Ms. Berry. This is Mercedes, Mercedes Jones."

Rachel was about to choke with the apple she was munching a few seconds ago. She felt the breath miss her and barely managed to respond with a simple greeting and couldn't help but feel embarrassed when she heard Mercedes chuckling.

"Are you free this afternoon?"


She still couldn't believe what was happening. A minute ago she was sitting on the couch at her home eating an apple while reading one of her theater's books, and a minute later she found herself drinking a cup of coffee with Mercedes Jones.

"So, from what I understood you are an independent and strong girl and these qualities are really admirable in a woman. But you also said that you wanted to change, even just your clothes so that's why I'm here." Mercedes smiles kindly at the girl before continuing. "I'm glad you contacted me. Don't get me wrong but girl you dress like you were in the fourth grade and if you want that that Brody kid to look at you, you have to show how amazing your body is."

"Are you ready?"

Rachel looked down doubtfully. When she was a child her fathers had told her that if she had to change in order to please a guy, then it was better to let go of him.
But it was too late to back out. Arrived at this point she preferred groped rather than do nothing. She wasn't 100% sure that this was what she wanted, no one is. It's difficult to be full secure of wanting to do a particular thing, and, in this case, the percentage of security was very low. She took a while before answering. She stared at her now empty cup of coffee before looking up at the girl who sat in front of her, waiting for an answer, and nodding though still full of doubts.

"Ready."

Mercedes had called Brody proposing him a blind date with a mysterious "suitor" for this Friday. Rachel wasn't surprised when he agreed saying that he was used to this kind of attention.

"So, what do you say?"

"Well, I'm flattered. I mean I don't blame this girl for wanting to go out with me, everybody think that I'm the sexiest guy in the school." Brody chuckled, feeling as if his confidence was increasing. "I think I can find some time for whoever this girl is, I just hope it'll worth it. "

Mercedes reassured the girl with a smile. "It will."

After the call Mercedes convinced Rachel to start with a close shadowing. They walked in the gym, the place where Brody went regularly and Rachel wasn't surprised when she saw him shirtless, as always, and winked at every pretty girl passed close to him. The more she looked at him and the more she couldn't understand when it occurred to her the idea to do all this for this guy.

She looked at him carefully, hoping to feel something, even just a slight tingling sensation in the stomach, but nothing. It was as if those bright eyes and that chiseled physique didn't do any effect on her or at least not like the first time she saw him. When you're in front of the person you have a crush on you should at least feel something, right? So why didn't she feel anything if not a sense of emptiness?

Suddenly Mercedes pulled her out of the gym and gave her indications of their new meeting for the next day.

"Trust me. At the end of the week that guy will be all over you."


Motta's School of Dance

Rachel's eyes widened when she saw where Mercedes had brought her. She could not help but be curious and ask constantly why they were there. She had heard already about that school but didn't understand how Mercedes could think that going to a dance school could help her to let go. Rachel kept to beat her feet on the ground anxiously as she bit her lower lip with insistence.

"Hey don't worry." Mercedes smiled hoping to calm her and make her stop to fret. "I'm here to help you to come out of your shell and since this is an environment to which you are accustomed, I though this was the perfect place. You said that Brody attends your dance class so here is where you'll learn how to flirt." Mercedes stopped a moment to speak to see if Rachel had understood her idea. "I'll wait here and check you out through a hidden camera. Soon as I'll see that you're not working hard enough I'll give you a little electric shock. Don't worry it's not gonna hurt." She added chuckling when she saw Rachel's face traumatized and before giving her a gentle push against the door.


"Hello class. As you all probably know I'm Brittany S. Pierce and I'll be your dance instructor."

"Remind me why I had to come as well." Finn whispered annoyed to the blue-eyed boy who was standing next to him.

"Because, dear brother, this weekend there's the party for the wedding anniversary of our parents and we don't want you to do the same disaster of the last year. We all know that dancing isn't exactly your thing." Kurt answered quickly without looking away from the front as he prepared to warm up. "Now shush."

Finn just rolled his eyes praying that this day would end as soon as possible. Sure, he danced like he had two left feet or maybe even worse but this didn't mean that he necessarily ought to take lessons. During junior prom while he was unleashing on the floor, he had even inadvertently broken one of his classmate's nose and, in spite of himself, he had a brother who reminded him of it every single day.

His mother Carole, and Kurt's father, Burt, now had been married for about four years or more and according to Finn, they shouldn't be surprised if this year he would have made a fool of himself on the dance floor, again. Kurt unfortunately didn't think the same and convinced Carole to let them take some dance classes before the incoming of the weekend.

It would be the most harrowing day of his entire life, of this Finn was sure.


Rachel looked around noticing that the there were only four girls including the teacher. There was a Latina who was smiling at Brittany, an Asian and a brown-haired girl who was wearing a very flamboyant clothing.

Rachel looked at her feet for a moment feeling her self-esteem going down more and more. They were very beautiful, each in their own way and she couldn't help but feel uncomfortable with herself. They all wore a top and shorts while she was just wearing a simple t-shirt and sweatpants. One of the rare times when she wears pants it has to be noted.

"Now everybody choose a partner to dance with and imitate everything I do. Well, not quite everything. For example you don't have to repeat what I say, but only the dance steps that I'll show you. Lord Tubbington always told me that it's better to specify to avoid misunderstandings seen that my mind is superior than yours."

Rachel snapped out of her thoughts unsure if that was an offense. She kinda felt relieved when she saw that she wasn't the only one confused judging from the faces of the others. Already at first sight it could be deduced that Brittany wasn't the smartest girl in the world but heck if she knew how to dance. Before Rachel could realize a guy gave her gently tap on the shoulder and offered as his partner.

Mike Chang was his name. He was a boy of Asian origin, well-mannered and also quite attractive. He was Brittany's assistant along with the Latina named Santana. He told her that the two girls were girlfriends, which didn't proper surprise Rachel. She and Mike stayed in silence for several minutes while continuing to follow Brittany's steps without even bothering to start a conversation.

"Ow!" Rachel cried out suddenly.

Mercedes wasn't joking when she spoke about electric shock.

"Are you okay?" Mike asked worried.

"Y-yeah sorry. D-do you always work here?" Rachel asked the first thing that went through her head and felt embarrassed when she heard the boy snicker.

"Yeah, I can say I know almost everyone now. The brown-haired girl you see dancing in a very theatrical way, is Sugar. Her father is the owner of the school and forced her to come at least once a month. The pretty Asian instead, is Tina. She comes here every week. I still don't understand why since she's a fantastic dancer."

It took only a few simple words and gentle tone he had used to make evident even to Rachel that he had a crush on that girl. It was useless to even just try to flirt with him. And just to make it clear: she wasn't using this as an excuse.

Rachel tried to remain indifferent to the continuous electric shock she felt. Mike was so busy with the dance moves that didn't even notice the grimaces she did.

She felt a little guilty when after a while Mike believed that she wasn't interested in having a conversation with him. But it wasn't true. She just didn't know what to say, that's all. She had never had problems of this kind. At school she has done a thousand speeches during the meetings and talked uninterruptedly while exposing her relations to the rest of the class. After high school, however, it was as if all the confidence she had in all these years had disappeared out of the blue.

Again, a slight electric shock led her out of her thoughts in order to focus on the guy who was in front of her.

"N-no, I'm just.. not used of having dialogues with strangers in an environment that may not be suitable for the circumstance. In a dance school you dance and we shouldn't talk disturbing the lesson and while finding very interesting to discover the interests and what one of my peers has to say I think there's a more eligible place for it." Rachel sighed deeply amazed to be able to talk, mostly blather, with someone.

Mike released a laughter after a few moments telling her not to worry, before turning his gaze again to Tina trying not to be noticed. Rachel stared enthralled the way Mike looked at the girl for whom he obviously had feelings for. She wondered if anyone would have ever looked at her in the same way, but strongly doubted it.

"Good job guys, you were all very good especially you Frankenstein. One day you'll have to teach me how you can move your feet out of time and in a different direction from the other one. Oh and by the way you danced I noticed that you needed to go to the bathroom so if you want you can go without shame."

It was after half an hour when Brittany stopped to speak again making everyone burst out laughing hysterically. Rachel's shoulders began to shake and she bit her lower lip to keep from laughing too.

Brittany was unaware that she had practically ridiculed that certain "Frankenstein" and while they were all busy staring at him amused, Rachel decided to keep her eyes on the floor in order to avoid the face certainly embarrassed of that poor boy.

"Okay enough. Let's move on to another type of dance and choose a new loser to dance with." Suddenly they all stopped laughing scared and concentrated again when they heard the annoyed voice of Santana. Brittany smiled innocent at her girlfriend and walked to the stereo to change the CD. As soon as the "Flamenco" came along Mike let go of Rachel's hands cordially before saying bye affably.

Rachel stood alone in silence trying to be indifferent to the continuous electric shock she received.

The dance hall was quite large and each pair was distant from each other to allow better movement so it was hard to see everyone there. Everybody seemed to have a companion so Rachel watched the other moving a strand of hair behind her ear disoriented.

"May I have this dance?"

A lovely young blond with big lips asked Rachel from behind handing his hand with a smile. "Sam." He said his name as soon as she agreed, and she in reply introduced herself without even looking at him.

Rachel hadn't even noticed the flirting tone he had used to compliment her for the name, in fact, not knowing how to replicate she pretended not to hear anything. Unfortunately Mercedes even if she wasn't next to them, had a way to remember her presence forcing Rachel to open the mouth.

"T-thanks."


Sam was fun. He enjoyed doing imitations of many famous people, despite the continual Santana's reproaches. They didn't pay it much attention, partly because the anger of Santana disappeared as soon as Brittany told her to leave them alone. It was funny how all the people in the there seemed to have eyes only for one person; and when Rachel turned around to look at the boy with whom she was dancing, she didn't feel the need to stare at him all the time.

However Sam made his portrayal of Jacob from "Twilight" and actors like Sean Connery and Matthew McConaughey, although she admits that they weren't exactly great. Rachel laughed when he told her to have some sort of obsession with chap sticks. If nothing else, she was having fun. Sam was ready to impress her with his imitation of James Earl Jones but suddenly the music stopped and the voice of Brittany was heard all over the room.

"Sorry guys but I need to call Lord Tubbington to make sure he didn't invite his friends while I'm out so, I let you 10 minutes of break."

"It was really nice to dance and talk with you." Sam said honestly before walking to the bench to get rest. Rachel greeted him waving her hand and looked at the door ready to meet Mercedes.

For now she thought to get by pretty well. In short, even if by force, she talked with two gorgeous kids without making too many bad impression. They were all resting and wiping the sweat and Rachel took advantage of the situation to get out of the room unnoticed. Mercedes as promised was sitting on a chair in the waiting room with a small laptop in front of her and a smirk in her face.

"Well well girl. That white boy wasn't bad uh?" Mercedes said giving another look at Sam from the camera.

"Yeah he was nice and hilarious. He wasn't exactly my type but definitely was a good company."

"Oh if you don't want him I'll take him." She joked, maybe. "Now you'll do the first step."

"What do you mean?"

Mercedes rolled her eyes at the girl's confused question. "Rachel, for the time you have spent in there I noticed that you don't do anything to get to know someone. You just stood there waiting for a cute guy to approach you. You should stop bring yourself down." She said unfulfilled. "I saw you in there and it wasn't not hard to see that you didn't feel at ease. I want the strong and independent Rachel again, because everything I've seen so far, was just a shy and insecure girl."

Rachel wanted to replicate but she couldn't. Though it was hard to admit, she was right. Rachel has exchanged three or four words with two guys but nothing more. Maybe she wasn't yet quite sure of herself; she didn't want to say or do something stupid and maybe that prevented her to open up. She was furious with herself. She knew that every minim word from Mercedes' mouth was nothing more than the truthful.

"Manhands", "RuPaul", "Treasure Trail", "Boy Hips". Rachel could write a book with only the list of her perfidious nicknames at school, and yet, despite the insults, the evil and the teasing, she didn't let those bring her down. She always lifted from the ground with the head high even when she was covered with slushes.

She shook away every bad thing that happened to her and took advantage of it to make her even stronger.

Where was that part of her?

Where was the part that has always distinguished her from the others?

Where was that Rachel Berry that everyone hated but she loved?

"C'mon, show me who the real Rachel Berry is."


"Alright I'll be there in a minute." Kurt hung up his phone almost as if he was annoyed before talking to Finn. "Blaine has an emergency and for "emergency" he needs someone to go with to buy some new bow ties for the wedding and also a new hair gel."

"That's great! So this means that we have to leave?" Finn became all of a sudden enthusiastic ready to retrieve his things.

"No no no no." Kurt shook his head and finger in denial. "I will go with Blaine, you will stay here to finish the course." He said emphasizing the two subjects. "We already paid for it and your feet still don't have the right coordination. I doubt that a day here will be enough but there's no other solution." Kurt walked to the bench and took his bag. "I'll be back later don't worry." He concluded by giving slight friendly pats on his brother's shoulder before he ran away, leaving Finn standing frustrated as he scratched his head.

Seriously?!

First, Kurt forces Carole to let him take this stupid dance lessons, and then leaves him alone like a perfect jerk.
Finn was already ridiculed enough when everyone, and stresses everyone, laughed at him. Sure, he and dancing were poles apart, but didn't think to be so bad.
He wanted to kick something to calm his anger, but all he could do was continue to sigh and look towards the void. If he hurried up maybe he could get away and then come back before Kurt. He thought it was a brilliant plan but he regretted at the mere thought that his mother had spent her money to pay for this superfluous course uselessly. On the other hand, even if he had stayed it would have been useless anyway. Let's face it, Finn was simply hopeless.

So he made his decision.

He picked up his bag ready to go out of that hell intent to return a few minutes before the class ended when something, or better, someone, made him change his mind.

"Excuse me. Would you like to be my partner?"

Finn turned around without a second thought when he heard an angelic voice behind him. It wasn't addressed to him, he was sure, but that didn't stop him to find out who it belonged to.

"I'm really sorry but I have one already. Later okay?"

Finn saw a petite brunette who nodded even though it was clear that she was disappointed by the rejection of a boy with dreadlocks' hair. He hadn't seen her before, perhaps because he was busy not to trip and focus so that Kurt would no longer bothered him. He noticed a slight disappointment as her gaze fixed to the floor. He began to walk toward her, without even knowing why.

He leaned down to her height right next to her ear. Gosh, she was even more petite than he thought.

"You can be mine if you want to." He did his best to not snigger when he saw her jump in fright. Unfortunately only after he realized how that phrase could be misunderstood so immediately added, "partner. D-dance partner." Finn was finally face to face with the girl and for a moment he was silent when his sight met two chocolate brown eyes.

She was... beautiful. Sure, she didn't have the standard pretty face, her nose was slightly big but somehow it fitted perfectly on her visage. Her mouth, contrariwise, was fleshy and rosy that seemed made to be kissed and he couldn't help but stare enchanted. He realized that he looked like a creepy peers to gaze at her without saying anything, so he tried as much as possible to find the strength to speak without drooling.

"Finn Hudson." He cleared his throat before extending his hand. He noticed how his hands intertwine with hers even though they were super tiny in comparison. Finn was about to slap his face as he thought of just leaving a light kiss on the back of that soft hand. Instead, he continued to smile nervous and look her in the eyes anxiously waiting to find out her name.

"Rachel Berry."


"Sorry."

Rachel giggled for the millionth time. "Stop apologizing every time you crush my feet."

"Y-yeah I'm just. Sorry. It's just that dance has never been my forte. Especially the wlatz."

Rachel bursted into laughter without meaning to and Finn immediately thought that was the most beautiful sound he had ever heard. "It's waltz."

"Right." He smiled embarrassed. "You.. you're moving well. I mean I don't understand why you need to be in this dance class since you're so good."

For the first time Rachel flushed, hoping not to be noticed, even though it was more than obvious from Finn's half smile who saw the color of her skin change. "Thank you. Actually a, uhm, an acquaintance of mine advised me this place more than anything else to meet new people."

"Is it working?"

Rachel noticed the nervous tone with which he asked the question in spite of trying to hide it. She found his nervousness adorable even though she didn't understand why he should be.

He was the most handsome guy she had ever laid eyes on. He was tall, like really really tall. Certainly more than 6 foot. From under the sleeveless you could see that he didn't have the classic sculpted physique, but she found his body perfect anyway.

Only up close she had noticed that his nose and the top of his cheeks were covered with freckles which made him even more fascinating. Rachel stared inscrutable at his two amber eyes and couldn't remove the smile she had on her face.

"For now, absolutely."


"So you came here with your brother but he has abandoned you to help his boyfriend?"

By that time they were talking for an hour and surprised both with how easy it was for them to talk to each other. Rachel was greatly pleased when he agreed to play the twenty questions' game. She had never had the chance to do it because no one had ever wasted a tiny amount of time necessary to get to know her better. Thinking about her past spent in high school Rachel just felt a bit of melancholy inside of her. She never was the most popular girl and, unfortunately, didn't even had a real friend. She was unaware that she was saying all this out loud and felt rather intimidated by her confession. Prevented Rachel listened of how Finn instead was the quarterback of his school and knew his best friend since they were children. She was stunned by the fact that despite his reputation at school he preferred to stand next to his brother and defend him from bullies who took aim at him for his sexual preferences.

Certainly she had never met a person like him.

Finn was only a year older than her, he loved video games, even if it embarrassed him to admit it, he played the drums since he was seven and his mother this weekend would have celebrated her wedding anniversary with his stepfather.

It was adorable the way he spoke about his mother and when she told him she never had one because grew by two gay dads, he smiled at her melancholy saying that before Burt, he never had a father.

"Yeah, he kinda forced me to come. To be honest I would rather be anywhere else instead of here, you know? Not that I think it's a bad thing to want to learn to dance, it's just that it's better that no one sees me dance."

Rachel stared at Finn with an indecipherable expression while small drops of sweat came down from the boy's forehead for the nervousness. A few seconds later Finn smiled hearing the soft chuckle exit out from her mouth. He couldn't tell if she was laughing because she was mocking him, but truth be told, he didn't care. He liked her laughter and see her white teeth shining as she smiled. It was as if it made him feel better, as much as this can seem absurd. The tension suddenly disappeared and even if he had met this girl only a few minutes ago, he felt comfortable talking with her. He seemed like an idiot to smile like a fool for no reason just because she was laughing, but he couldn't help it, and he felt even more idiot not to be able to remove the smile on his face even when she had stopped laughing.

"I thought I was the only one to babble when I'm nervous." Rachel said looking at their feet instead of him while biting her lip.

"Why should you be nervous?" Finn asked in a low tone making Rachel to look up to him. "I mean you seem a really cool girl like, you don't need to be nervous. I mean you're beautiful. Beautiful gir- woman like you had nothing to be nervous about. If anything people who speak with someone so smart like you should be. I mean you're really pretty and intelligent and I- I think I'm just gonna to shut up."

Once again Rachel didn't say anything for a moment and Finn let go of her hand to rub the back of his neck nervously feeling like the biggest clumsy existing. He was ready to apologize, even though he didn't know exactly for when he was, with his enormous surprise, embraced by her.

He leaned a little just because of their height difference was really a lot and didn't need a genius to figure that she raised herself up on the tip of her toes.

"It's nice." Finn thought. It was as if everything else had disappeared and could only hear Rachel's heart beat against his chest.

"Thank you." Rachel whispered softly in his ear and for the first time Finn thought he had finally said something right.

Neither of them bothered to let go of each other and almost forgot to be in the middle of a ballroom until a small hit on Finn's nape made him turn suddenly.

"What the fu-"

"If you two are so horny that you can't keep your hands off of each other, you should get out of here and find a hotel room, or the fury of Snixx will befall on you two virgins. No one here wants to see this Frankenteen and the little Streisand fornicate like two cats in heat." Santana's voice was threatening and ran her gaze first to one and then to the other as to warn them. She could be really scary.

"We weren't... I-I swear we weren't do anyt-" Finn tried to justify himself dismayed.

"Oh don't try to deny it Finnocence, the bulge underneath your pants talks for itself." Santana glared at them one last time before heading back to Brittany.

Finn gasped feeling his cheeks redden with embarrassment looking down to make sure that what Santana said was just a joke. He breathed a sigh of relief when he realized that it was so. It would've been really humiliating if Rachel had started to believe he was a guy who thought of only one thing. Sure, he cannot deny the fact that Rachel was an extremely attractive girl, but he knew she was much more than that. She wasn't like other girls. She was mature, witty, funny, special. He was sure that Rachel would react to Santana's comments and it must be said that he was surprised when he heard her laugh.

Yep, she was totally special.

"Okay guys switch partners again and show me what you've learned."

Rachel immediately stopped realizing that her time with Finn was over.

She didn't know what to do.

It was... strange. She didn't want to spend the last hour with someone else instead of Finn.

"Hey. Ready to dance?" The dreadlocks' hair guy came out of nowhere turning to Rachel without even noticing that Finn was still there.

"Hey man..." Finn interjected waiting for him presents.

"Joe Heart." The boy said politely, holding out his hand towards Finn.

"Nice to meet you Joe. I'm Finn. Uhm.. can you- do you mind find someone else to dance with? I mean it's okay for you if I dance with Rachel?" Finn said sheepishly hoping that Rachel was okay with that and, judging by her small smile, she was.

"Yeah, sure, of course. Sugar was practically begging me to stay with her because she's fascinated by my hair anyway." Joe chuckled as he watched them. "I'd better go and leave you two alone. Finn, you're lucky to have a cute girlfriend like her." Joe gave him a friendly pat on the back and went away soon after without giving them time to reply.

It was the first time that happened to her. Being mistaken for someone's girlfriend and for some bizarre reason, she didn't mind. Finn, conversely, was turned red as a pepper and tried in every way not to look at her. He was too genuine.

"So, boyfriend." Rachel said jokingly. "How come you want to dance with me again?"

Finn chuckled feeling the tension disappear. "Well.." He said raising an eyebrow and taking her hands as soon as the music started again. "We haven't finished the twenty questions yet, right? Favorite color?"


"Thank you so much for coming. I really do hope you enjoyed the time spent here and hope to see you soon."

Everyone applauded tired while they started to regain their bags and freshen up.
They were quite satisfied with what they had learned, even Rachel who looked up to her left to see that Finn was still standing next to her. She wasn't ready to say him goodbye. She still wanted to know so many things about him. She was intrigued by him and the idea that this would be the last time they'd seen each other made her sad. Unfortunately she was forced to faced the truth and go back to Mercedes. Maybe he hadn't even enjoyed the time spent with her as much as she did.

"Can I have your number?" Finn asked timidly as he scratched his head. It was something he often did when he was nervous Rachel noticed. It took her a moment to realize what he had said. Has she really heard well or was it all a figment of her imagination? After all why would a guy like him would like to have her number? Rachel had to stop getting all these complexes.

"Give me your phone." She answered with a smile chasing away all her thoughts.

Finn immediately obeyed and for the excitement he almost dropped his cell phone on the floor.
Rachel recorded her number unable to restrain in putting a small asterisk, which was to symbolize a star, next to her name and soon after she passed her phone to him telling him to save his number.
Finn smiled amiably when he saw the little star next to Rachel's name intrigued in knowing its meaning. There were still so many things that he wanted to know about her. He wanted to ask her other twenty questions, or even more. Regrettably he snorted when he heard the shrill voice of a boy coming from the opposite side of the room right next to the door to call, or rather shout, his name.

"Looks like my brother is here." Prior to reconsider his choice, Finn leaned down to give a light kiss on Rachel's cheek hoping not to get a slap. She was soft as he had imagined and warm up when his lips came into contact with her skin. "Meeting you was the best thing that could have happened to me here, I'm sincere." Rachel melt when she saw Finn's crooked smile and failing to think straightly.

"Before I forgot.." Finn said as he walked toward his brother holding his bag with an hand and placing it on the right shoulder. "I really like your shirt. It's.. cute."

Rachel kept to look unto the direction in which Finn went before lowering her gaze to her clothes.

Cute? On her shirt were depicted an unicorn and a rainbow. How could a sane guy find it cute? Maybe he was just kidding. Maybe he was ironic. Maybe it was a way as any to make fun of her or whatsoever. Or maybe, maybe he was just... Finn.

"Rachel!" Mercedes ran to her hugging her happily catching Rachel of surprise. "I'm so proud of you." She pulled away looking at her with a huge smile. "You flirt with that guy in an impressive way and if I didn't know that you're doing all this for Brody, I would have traded you two for a real couple."

Rachel suddenly froze.

Brody.

With Finn she had completely forgotten about everything else, even the motive why he was there in the beginning.

"I can't wait to show you what we're gonna do tomorrow. Bet you'll love it. You were fantastic today but mostly you've got his number! And I haven't needed to use the electric shock."

It's true, Mercedes hadn't resorted to that device. Nevertheless, Rachel couldn't understand a thing: when she touched his hands and she was in his arms, why she felt a jolt go throughout her body?

"Yeah.. no electric shock."


Meet me on 95 Stanton St. at 7pm. :)
-Mercedes

The afternoon of the day after Rachel's cell phone vibrated when a message arrives. She stared at the screen lit up for a moment wondering what Mercedes had planned. Rachel looked at the clock to check what time it was. The short hand was pointed straight at the number 3 and the long one indicated 12. She heaved a sigh of relief when she saw that she had plenty of time to prepare. She made a quick shower letting the hot water traveling along her whole body, and soon after she finished, she put on the clothes less "embarrassing" that she could find. Before she knew it was already 5:00 pm so she hurried out and get in the car. Knowing New York's traffic, two hours would have been sufficient to get to the place that Mercedes had established.

As expected, Rachel arrived just in time to find Mercedes waiting for her waiting in front of Arlene's Grocery.

Of course she knew what place it was. Just moved to New York she hoped that people let her sing every Saturday during karaoke nights but for some reason no one was going to give an opportunity to a young ingénue Ohio girl with a big dream.

"You're here!" Mercedes exclaimed before taking Rachel by the hand and led her inside the bar. It was quite crowded although it wasn't the open mic night.

It's been years since she went there but nothing has changed, not even one iota. Rachel was too busy looking around circumspect to hear what Mercedes was saying. Only the words "perform" and "song" interrupted her disjointed thoughts.

"I'm sorry I got distracted." Rachel said mortified.

Mercedes sighed sympathetically to her carelessness. "I was saying that you're gonna perform with a song of your choice tonight. They usually let sing new talents on Saturday from 3 to 7pm but I convinced them to make a small exception for you. You just have to blew them away and I have no doubt that you will."

A bright smile appeared Rachel's face. It was what she always wanted. Someone who believed in her enough to give her so much trust.

"Why? I mean I'm really grateful to you for giving me this amazing opportunity, but what has this to do with Brody?"

Mercedes looked at Rachel as if she was looking for the right words to say. "Yesterday to help you let go I had to somehow move you. On that stage instead you'll be alone. You, a microphone and the spotlight on you. The only time I saw your safely and naturally side was with that guy from the dance class, and I want to see it again. I know that you asked me for help for the way you dress.." Mercedes wrinkled her nose at the sight of the clothing that Rachel was wearing "but change isn't only this. I know that in the beginning you were more confident and maybe New York may have decreased your self-esteem, but it needn't to be so." Mercedes stopped hoping not to have confused her more than before. Maybe it didn't even make sense but she hoped that Rachel understood what she was trying to say. "I want to help you to change again. Help you to get back as you were before. So please will you sing for me?"

Rachel breathed nodding. She didn't need to be asked twice. If it was to sing Rachel Berry would be ready to rock the local; the only problem was to find the right song in her repertoire.


"Thanks for accompany me here tonight, Puck" Finn said, turning to his friend with the mohawk. "I mean with the preparations for the party for my mom and Burt, Kurt's driving me crazy and he finds a way to "relax", as he likes to call it, with Blaine in the apartment that we share." He said a little nauseated. It's not that he had problems with the sexual orientation of his brother, but he didn't need to hear how fantastic Blaine was and how much he liked to do, whatever the two of them do, in the bedroom.

"Dude, first of all, what your brother says or screams or whatever while he fucks is the last thing that I care about. Second of all, come and stay with me. I've already told you that there are no problems for Quinn." Puck said as he drank from a bottle of beer.

"Yeah but you know what's worse than hearing my own brother in private situations? It's hearing you doing it with your girl. Seriously you know the most vulgar words that exist." Finn said also taking a bottle.

"I take that as a compliment." Puck boasted. "Anyway why are even here? There're tons of bar here in New York and you choose this one?"

"I don't know. Kurt told me this is a good place where people often perform in songs and I thought it would be nice watch live." Finn shrugged.

"Are you sure you don't have a pussy instead of a penis?"

Finn just pretended not to hear anything. Sometimes talking to Puck was like talking to a wall.

"Maybe that's the reason why you haven't call that girl."

"But you were the one who told me not to call her yet!" He raised his voice without even realizing it.

Okay, maybe telling Puck about Rachel wasn't the smartest choice that Finn could make, but it wasn't his fault if he couldn't get her out of his mind. In addition they knew each other since they were about 8 years old and Puck, no matter slow he might be, would have figured it out that Finn had met someone sooner or later.

"But it was you to listen to me."

Finn just scratched his head and argue with himself whether to call her, or listen to Puck again and wait for three more days, but didn't know if he would stand another minute.

It was droll the fact that he missed a girl he only just met. He missed her voice so much to have the impression of having heard it from the stage.

"Man, the Rachel Berry you were talking about, happen to be a petite leggy brunette with a jew nose?" Puck asked without even looking at him.

"How do you know?" Finn followed the direction in which his friend was looking. He didn't just imagined that voice because Rachel was there.


"Good evening everyone. I'm Rachel Berry and I'll be singing "I dreamed a dream" from the seminal Broadway classic "Les Mis". Although I know that you're used to another type of music and probably many of you present don't even know what Broadway is, I hope you can still appreciate the song that I'm going to sing and the artistic choice of this musical piece and manage to acknowledge the fact that even though it isn't a classic rock and roll song, this kind of music can be appreciated and loved as well." Rachel put on her best show face before nodding to allow the boy to start playing music.

There was a time when men were kind
When their voices were soft
And their words inviting

Rachel's eyes narrowed feeling like an adrenaline rush.

There was a time when love was blind
And the world was a song
And the song was exciting

She started to sing with her eyes closed. She didn't want to be distracted in any way.

This was her moment to shine even if only in a karaoke bar.
No one dared to say a word in that moment. They were all focused to listen to the melodious sound that came from her mouth. For a split second she opened her eyes noticing how everyone was shocked. She couldn't hide the smile and contain the joy when, once finished her performance, all rose to applaud her. The feeling to be acclaimed. The spotlight on her. She wasn't going to let go of this dream again just for some boy's criticisms. Her heart warmed feeling of being appreciated for who she was and what she could do: sing.

After doing a little bow, Rachel ran off the stage embracing a Mercedes full of pride who keeps repeating how incredible and magnificent she was.
Mercedes was ready to take her out of the bar because tomorrow would have been the most important day but a voice caught Rachel's attention who turned giddy at the sight of a young tall boy.

Wow.

Finn's vocabulary was never very large and, as soon as he heard Rachel sing, this was the only thing that he could think of.

She had told him that she wanted to be on Broadway, but he didn't expect such a thing. He was speechless and amazed that didn't even noticed that Rachel had already left the stage. Fortunately Puck kicked his leg under the table to get his attention.

"Dude, shut your mouth, you're drooling everywhere." The boy with the mohawk said exasperated. "Why don't you just go to her?"

Finn looked doubtfully at Rachel while she was hugging a smiling Afro-American. "I dunno. I mean, she probably has already forgotten me."

"Stop with all these unnecessary worries and grow the balls to talk to that girl!"

"Her name is Rachel." Puck glared at him and Finn raised his hands as if to apologize. "Okay, okay. Sorry."

"Look," Puck said when he noticed that his friend was still gazing at her. "if you want my opinion I don't think she has already forgotten about you. From what you've told me I think that, for some arcane reason, she's interested in you. Plus, it isn't easy to forget a person who dances like you." Finn smiled sarcastically to the last words before looking at Rachel again. Thousand thoughts whipped in his head. Puck was right. If he didn't hurry up, probably one day looking back, he would regret not having taken advantage of the situation to talk to Rachel. She was just a girl. At the NYU all his girls schoolmates flirted with him or asked him out on a date, and now he was afraid of a possible rejection? He shouldn't be so worried but he was.

Let's face it: she wasn't just a girl.

"Fine. I'll go." Finn rose from his chair ignoring Puck shouting things like: "don't forget to use the condom."

By now he was used by his rude comments thus, instead of answering him, Finn took a deep breath and walked over to the girl whom he couldn't take his eyes off. The girl he had met only the day before but he couldn't stop thinking about. The girl who.. was going away?

"Rachel!" Finn screamed involuntarily. Almost everyone turned toward him but he he didn't notice. He walked over to her grinning like a fool when he saw Rachel smiling. "Hi."

"Finn Hi! What-what are you doing here?" Asked nervously confused.

"I just came with a friend of mine" Finn pointed behind him with his thumb without taking his eyes away. "You were.. you were great up there. I mean you told me already how much you love to sing but that was just.. incredible." He said all of a breath.

It's amazing how this guy could be sweet, adorable and nervous at the same time. He was the first boy who seemed really honest and complimented her because he simply wanted to do it. "I... uhm, thank you. Really." Rachel pulled out only five words and could not hide her reddening.

They were both standing staring at one another as if the silence was enough. Finn looked at her as if it was the first time he had met her. As if he was only in that moment admiring her figure. She was beautiful and he never tired of telling that to himself. He don't even see the other girl who pretended to cough discreetly to get noticed.

"I'm sorry. I'm Finn." The smile that distinguished him appeared again, but it was obvious that it wasn't directed to Mercedes.

"Mercedes, nice to meet ya. I don't wanna seem rude but, Rachel and I have a long day to deal with tomorrow so it would be better to go so we can rest." She said a little mortified.

"S-sure." Finn looked at Rachel begging her with his eyes to stay. Before he could change his mind, Finn gently took her hand and spoke to Mercedes. "Do you mind if I "steal" Rachel for a few seconds? I just have to ask her one thing."

"Of course." She agreed, noting the way in which Finn held Rachel's hand. "Just be quick."

Finn thanked Mercedes and dragged Rachel a few meters away in a quieter corner, still holding her hand. "I'm sorry to have ruined your evening with your friend and to have dragged you away from her, but I just wanted to apologize for not calling you or texting you. I know it's only been 24 hours since I asked your number but my friend Puck has managed to convince me to wait three days before calling you and I don't even know why I listened to him. I usually don't follow his advices but this time I did and I'm regretting it bitterly." Finn had to stop talking without thinking. Rachel must have thought he was a nerd loser who had trouble talking to girls, although it was partly true.

To his surprise she just laughed. She laughed genuinely not commenting on the way of thinking of this certain Puck. She knew that kind of guy and was in a sense relieved to know that Finn wasn't like him. Even if she already knew that he wasn't like the rest.

"I.. I also wanted to ask you if I could see you again." His words came out in a rush that they almost just seemed incomprehensible meaningless words.

Rachel gently shook his hand to reassure him. "I would love to."

Finn's face lit up and immediately took off at top speed asking her if she was free that weekend. "You know, there's the wedding anniversary of my mother and Burt like I told you and I wanted to show you how I improved. W-with the dancing I mean." He added immediately. Heck, he looked like a clumsy child.

Rachel lowered her gaze for the first time and for a moment Finn thought she would refuse. "I.. I have to see how another thing turns out first." Rachel raised her head, squeezing Finn's hand more. "It's not a no. But it's not a yes either. Right now I have so many things to think about and I wanna be sure of somethingfirst."

Finn relaxed at her touch and chuckled when he saw the puppy face of Rachel even though he was naturally disheartened. He showed once again his crooked smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. It was a little sad that Rachel hadn't agreed right away, as he hoped, but he couldn't blame her. Maybe it was too soon to invite her to such an important event but he couldn't help but wonder about what else she had to deal with. The thought that she had another boy wore on him. But if that was the case, why has she flirted with him? He wasn't an expert like Puck, but if even his friend had told him that Rachel was interested in him, then it must be true.

He didn't want to ask questions so he just nodded sadly, trying not to show his mood. Honestly, make Rachel feel guilty was the last thing he wanted to do.

"Don't worry." He said dejected before giving her an invitation with the directions of the place and time of the party. "Just in case you change your mind." He added hopeful grinning without even realizing it making Rachel giggle. Finn looked over her shoulders and, catching a glimpse of Mercedes' impatient expression, hastened to say goodbye. "I hope to see you again." He whispered melancholy. "I go now. I have to make sure that Puck isn't drunk or his girlfriend will kill me." Finn once again gave her an innocent and receding kiss on the cheek before saying goodbye one last time and head in a different direction.

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

Rachel was mad at herself for not having accepted the invitation of Finn even if deep down she knew that it wouldn't be fair. He was the sweetest guy she had ever met and he deserved a girl who wasn't intent on conquering another boy, even though she thought about it less as time passed.

"Wasn't he the guy from yesterday?" Mercedes asked with a smirk when they were out of the bar.

"Yes.. why?" She asked slowly.

"Nothing, just for asking. You two seemed pretty close that's all."

"Mercedes I just met him." She replied, feeling obliged to give explanations.

"I wasn't alluding to anything, girl."

Rachel ignored Mercedes' grin and turned to a nanosecond to the door with the invitation in her hand, thinking back to the conversation of a few minutes ago.

I hope to see you again too.


Friday.

The day that she was waiting for since she had sent that video. The day that she revealed her "feelings" to Brody. The day that Rachel Berry would finally completed her make over with a change of look.

It was 6:30 am when Rachel woke up. She looked into the mirror still wearing her pink pajamas covered with hearts. Was she really ready to let go this part of her? All in all she didn't mind the way she dresses.

She breathed slowly grabbing the comb smiling to herself remembering that in high school she used it as a microphone.

The karaoke of the night before was unforgettable and it made her realized how much she missed being a star. It didn't matter how much her appearance would have changed that day, deep down she was still the glee club loser and, even if it seems absurd, she was happy about that.

Rachel got ready calmly and awaited Mercedes' coming. Their meeting was set in Rachel's apartment at around 8:00 am. Rachel took one last look at the time; 7:55 am.

Five more minutes.

Rachel beat her foot on the carpet of her habitation and walked back and forth with her eyes fixed on the wall clock that was in the living room. She jumped when she heard the doorbell ring. It was better if she took a chamomile tea before.

Mercedes, arrived on time, sat in Rachel's bedroom, without wasting time, to observe the content of her closet. She left the doors open and opened the drawers one by one. Rachel didn't miss the way Mercedes tightened her lips together to keep from saying anything too offensive.

"Well.. ehm.. perhaps we can save something, but most of these clothes are really too.. uhm... childish."

Rachel turned red for the shame but it didn't matter what Mercedes would say. She might plead, beg or even pay her; Rachel would never have got rid of those clothes. They were like a part of her.

She couldn't help but feel offended when she saw that almost all of her clothes were thrown on the bed, some even in the floor, leaving the inside of the wardrobe practically empty.

Rachel watched sweaters with reindeer and owls, schoolgirl skirts and dresses with polka dots looking back on all these years wearing those clothes. No one seemed to appreciate her taste in style. Well, no one except his dads and... Finn.

Mercedes grabbed Rachel's elbow before walking out the door with a big smile. "Let's go shopping."


"So you go in that way and I in this one." She said pointing in opposite directions. "We meet back here in half an hour to try on your new clothes, okay? Okay." Rachel didn't even have the time to answer because Mercedes had already run away.

Rachel did all she could to avoid taking the usual T-shirts and clothing, and she couldn't help in choosing a pink dress ankle-length. It wasn't exactly the mature style that Mercedes had recommended to her, but that didn't mean that it didn't look nice.

However Rachel kept walking around taking two sweaters and a polka dot dress. She limited herself to the choice of shoes with a low heel and ended it all with a plaid skirt and pants. After seem quite satisfied, She walked to where she had to wait for Mercedes.

Rachel waited for about a quarter of an hour when she saw her arrive in the distance covered with clothes in her arms. Her eyes widened when she saw so many different items of dress and contained a laugh when she noticed the exhausted face of Mercedes.

There were shoes, accessories, clothes, shirts, skirts and pants. All very different from which Rachel was used to.

"Try the clothes you have chosen first, and then mine." Mercedes hooked her arm with Rachel's one and dragged her towards the dressing rooms without allowing her to demur.

Rachel closed the door behind her before undressing herself and wear the sweater she had chose in combination with a skirt and a pair of shoes. She examined keenly her choice one last time while smoothing out the skirt.

After a few minutes the door opened again and with a satisfied smile Rachel stood in front of the mirror.

"Oh hell to the no!" Rachel looked stunned as she clutched her arms around herself.

What else had she done wrong?

Mercedes breathed in and out with her eyes closed for a few seconds before opening them again. That look didn't promise anything good. It was fearful but also imperceptible. "Berry, why did you choose these clothes?" Mercedes finally asked.

Rachel looked into the mirror confound wondering what was wrong. It was her usual style and didn't understand why Mercedes was so disappointed. After all, she hadn't done it on purpose. It had become instinctively choose that type of clothing.

"I-I.. I don't know. I thought it was okay."

And it was true. She didn't think Mercedes would react that way.

"For who?"

She didn't answer. She looked at Mercedes trying to maintain a façade impassive when, in reality, she just wanted to collapse. She had become an expert in upset and dishearten those who surrounded her. Her mouth was slightly open and hardly the words of apology were heard. She returned silently into the dressing room with the knowledge of having disappointed the person who was committing to help her.

She changed as fast as she could, this time wearing a blue sweater and pants, and she hoped that Mercedes would be happy that for once she had decided not to wear a skirt. She should have known better it wouldn't go as she had hoped.

"Rachel." Once again Mercedes looked at the reflection of Rachel in the mirror. "You don't need to hide behind these clothes. I appreciate that at least there's some color but you're not a teenager anymore and you should start to wear suitable clothes for your age."

"What are you thinking?"

What was she was thinking?
That was a really good question.
What was she was thinking?

"That I feel stupid. I mean you are doing everything to help me and I don't want you to think that I'm not striving, because it's not so." Rachel said showing conviction. "I've always felt comfortable in these shoes notwithstanding nobody seems to notice me. I just... I don't want to be judged by what I wear."

Rachel lowered her head feeling tears come streaming down her face. "Furthermore I'm not beautiful enough to afford clothes more mature."

Not being enough. Of this Rachel was always worried about. She felt the ought to prove her qualities everytime, even when it wasn't required. Prove to be up to it.
It was like being on a seesaw: one day she was aware of being great and the next day she doubted it. She just wanted to get off the damn swing. Say farewell to it once and for all.
Without warning Mercedes hugged Rachel letting the girl liberate all her emotions. Rachel hated to show her weaknesses, but could no longer keep everything inside.

Mercedes pulled away wiping Rachel's tears looking at her in the eyes. "Why don't you go and try what I have chosen?"

Rachel nodded to the rhetorical question and went back into the dressing room.
She would never have thought it would please her, yet it was so. It wasn't such a drastic change, but there was a noticeable difference than before.
She looked at her reflection thinking about how even a simple elegant skirt could make her look more sophisticated.
Rachel barely heard Mercedes compliment her and tell her to go to try on another piece of clothing.
This time she wore a pair of skinny jeans and heeled shoes which made her legs seemed kilometric.

"You know what I see?" Churches of nowhere Mercedes. "A beautiful woman, with a hot body and an amazing butt which you should value more." She gave her a small and friendly slap on the buttock, startling Rachel as they both giggled.

The brunette was stunned by what she had in front of her. It was always her. Just with different clothes, and for some odd reason she thought she was pretty.

"Thank you." Rachel said softly, shifting her eyes to the other girl.

"Oh c'mon leave for later the fuss and let's continue." Rachel didn't miss the joking tone Mercedes had used.


After an hour of change of clothes, accessories and shoes, they came out of the mall both pretty complacent. Rachel even managed to convince Mercedes to buy the pink dress she had chosen, surprisingly getting also her approval.
They walked a couple of blocks continuing to talk without having a specific argument.
It was nice having someone to talk to.
Despite Mercedes was there just to help her, Rachel had the feeling that the little time spent together has made them become friends, and this was without doubt one of the things she was the most grateful.
Rachel's feet were starting to hurt now, she was wearing heels really high and almost marveled that she had agreed to wear them.
Mercedes finally stopped opening the door and entering in a room full of hair products and chairs, each in front of a mirror. Rachel didn't know that the next step would be to go to the hair salon.

Inside there was no one except the hairdresser who was waiting for them with a friendly smile on his face. He wasn't very tall, certainly just 5 foot 8. He had some two nice eyebrows shaped triangle and from what Rachel could see, he also had a ton of gel in his hair.
As they approached him, Mercedes introduced her Blaine Anderson, saying that he would be her hairdresser while she would have finished the preparations for the upcoming date.
Rachel didn't feel uncomfortable being alone with a stranger anymore, so she nodded unquestioningly.
Blaine had just finished washing her hair explaining how careful you have to be. Rachel was amused listening to the serious tone he used, as if the hair were a treasure and watched his face inspired on the subject. She didn't speak so much. She just wanted to listen to him, but when Blaine began to make her questions she had to open her mouth.

"So this Brody, is he attractive at least?" Blaine finished to dye Rachel's hair but not from the top. Something called "chatouche" whatsoever. She was curious to know how her new cut would be, but before she left, Mercedes had covered all the mirrors so that Rachel could see her new makeover just at the end.

"Well sure he is but.. sometimes I think he's just that." She whispered the last part as if she didn't want Blaine to hear it.

"Hope for the best for your date. But if it were not so, don't worry. There are so many hot guys around. Don't tell my boyfriend, I beg you." Blaine immediately added, chuckling.

"I didn't know you had a boyfriend." Forsooth, she didn't even know he was on the other team. She laughed at herself for not having recognized it before, but she wasn't even the kind of person who loved to put labels on everyone.

"Yeah, he's amazing. He's my anchor. It took me a bit to acknowledged it but when I did, I heard a little voice in my head saying that I was looking for him forever. I'm sorry I shouldn't talk about Kurt right now." Blaine's face flushed suddenly and couldn't stop smiling.

He was lucky. Lucky to have found a guy and being able to love him in spite of people's prejudices. She knew how difficult it was to love someone but afraid to show it for fear of being laughed at, targeted or judged. Being raised by a gay couple had made her different from most of her peers; while they considered inhumane a relationship between two people of the same sex, she was convinced that there was nothing wrong with that. She almost snickered at the fact that although he had promised that he would stop talking about his love, he went on without noticing.
He told her of how Kurt was stressed for a certain party scheduled for the next day and she couldn't help but think of that awkward but adorable guy who, in spite of her best efforts, she couldn't get out of her head.
Rachel had pondered whether or not to accept the invitation of Finn, but despite a huge part of her wanted to just go to the feast, something was holding her from doing it. She had to think about Brody and their date first, and then another boy. No matter how the latter can be, sweet, kind, polite, lovable and handsome.
She had become a person too reflective, or she had always been without knowing it.
Rachel stared at the cloth covering the mirror unable to stop thinking about Finn.
When Blaine talked about how Kurt was his soul mate, about how he would never understand why he's deserved a person like him, her thoughts turned quickly toward Finn, a boy she barely knew.
Rachel had always been a hasty girl: she wanted everything at once and too much. She remained immersed in her reflections even when Blaine began to cut her bangs.

After chatting a little more with Blaine and listened carefully to the correct way to use the gel, although in all honesty Rachel didn't understand why he was telling her all this, Mercedes reappeared from the door with a dress which was hidden under a cloth covers.

"Rachel! You cannot even imagine how looker you are now. Blaine has really outdone himself this time." Mercedes said with a huge enthusiasm as she admired Rachel's new haircut. They both thanked Blaine for the great work, praising him for his skill and knowledge. Rachel was ready to follow Mercedes when she turned to Blaine to hug and thank him for one last time. She didn't expect the latest tips that Blaine gave her for her encounter with Brody.

"Just listen to your heart."


This is it.

The moment had arrived.
We can say that Rachel has always been a melodramatic girl, and saying that for her this is was a matter of life or death, it was belittling the emotions she felt. After an expert named Kitty finished her make-up, Rachel stood with her back against the mirror keeping her eyes firmly closed.
She felt Mercedes' hands resting on her shoulders who kindly helped her to turn around.

"Open your eyes."

For nervousness Rachel almost couldn't even find the strength to lift the eyelids.
She swallowed slowly before opening her eyes slowly. Her jaw snapped open failing to make a sound for her great shock. She certainly wasn't another person, but you could see the change, and how. Her forehead, clearly visible before, was now covered with a bangs that she surprisingly loved. Her hair was flowing, voluminous and shiny and the ash blond in the extreme of her hair were just perfect. She had also noted the makeup and the way her eyes seemed more intense thanks only to the eye-liner, while her lips were lit by a simple pink flesh lip gloss. Her body was finally valued and for the first time she watched her curves, which she almost thought of not having, accentuated by a black and elegant dress, short up above her knees leaving on display her legs which had always been covered by her long stockings. She had never worn heels so high and yet she didn't feel uncomfortable in those shoes. Besides, they compensated for her small stature. A tiny tear of joy rolled down Rachel's rosy cheeks, who smiled astonished.

"I-I feel beautiful." It was all she could say in that moment of surprise and although it sounded narcissistic, she couldn't take her eyes off of herself.

"It's because you are." Mercedes looked at her like a mother who saw her daughter becoming a woman. "I'm so proud of you."

"It's all up to you now." Mercedes was the first to break the silence that had been created. "Brody is waiting for you on the terrace on the roof. Whatever happens, I want you to know that I'm really happy for you. You're wonderful, and I pray that this boy has nothing to complain about." Mercedes said menacingly and a giggle involved the two girls for a brief trice.

But something had made her think over. Perhaps the judgment of another shouldn't be a concern.

"How others see me isn't important. How I see myself means everything." She had read that phrase somewhere while roaming through the internet and thought it was the right time to say it. Not to Mercedes but more to herself eidetically.

"Praise."

Rachel released a wistful laugh and hugged Mercedes once again trying in every way to hold back tears. "Thank you so much."

"It was a pleasure."


Ten, nine, eight, seven...

Rachel mentally counted the steps that were left before crossing the door that would lead her on the roof of the building. The beating of her heart quickened step by step and even if she was partly nervous, she knew she was ready. A light breeze hit her as soon as she opened the door. She found herself in front of a guy in a suit who smiled surprised.

Her heart began to beat normally and as far as she wanted to, she couldn't be excited for this date. She thought that once she arrive there, something would change. But it didn't.

"Whoa, Rachel. You.. you look sexy."

Mellifluous. This is the right adjective to describe Rachel's smile. She didn't want to strain it, but she couldn't suppress her disturbance any longer and, consequently, the disappointment prevailed on her. She was, even just a little, flattered by the fact that he thought she was "sexy", she would never denied it. She just was hoping for something more.
After a little time to recover herself, Rachel sat bitterly in the chair opposite to Brody's one, feeling like a lump in her throat.

"I- I'm shocked. I mean I knew that everyone in school are crazy for me but, I'm content that my mysterious suitor is you."

Rachel eyed him dumbfounded as he took a seat, not getting if it was a compliment or a mere attempt.

"And well you're just.. hot. Really hot." Brody checked her out as if it were the first time he saw her, and perhaps it was so.

After all, he had never really noticed Rachel and only on that occasion he had wasted the time to admire her.

"I'm satisfied you listened to my advice and replaced your clothes with these far more sensual. I'm sorry I'll stop talking and let you say what you needed to say." Brody chuckled, licking his lips without taking his eyes off her.

She felt like a prize, A trophy. A stupid collector's item, and it wasn't what she desired. It wasn't the look that Rachel hoped he would had. He was staring at her, but not in a sweet and dreamy way.
She had never been the kind of girl too mawkish, yet even she wanted to live a love story. Not to fill a stupid whim, but to have someone to give all of herself to. She was able to love. To give more love than had ever been given. But no one knows that.

Rachel stared at those two blue eyes with an impassive look.

Why? Why did she wanted that those beautiful clear sea eyes, were amber instead? Why did she wanted that he had freckles? Why didn't he had a crooked smile and deep dimples? Why? Why everything she wanted to see in Brody had something to do with Finn?

It was as if she wanted to change him too. The difference was that she practically wanted a different person, and Brody could never be that person.

"I..." Rachel sighed with eyes closed. All that time spent with Mercedes had helped her to be more confident nevertheless the snarl in her head did not allow her to utter a sentence that was not made up of two simple words. "I'm sorry."

Brody finally looked her in the eye even more bewildered than before. "What?"

"I'm sorry I wasted your time. I thought you were just what I wanted but, now I realized that you're not. No, I-I've always known that but I pretended to feel something for you because I thought you were the only guy who would never noticed me."

Brody looked at Rachel curiously actually interested in what she was saying.

"You are obviously the most charming guy in the school, but... you're not the right guy for me. You've instilled in me the idea of having to change, without ever telling me the opposite. Most girls probably would die to be sitting here in my place, but not me." The mascara was starting to trickle but Rachel still continued to talk without stopping. "This.." She opened her arms in despair "is what I've always dreamed of. A date with a boy by candlelight under the stars that would make me feel special just for one night. But I don't feel that way right now." Rachel ducked her head, feeling guilty about what he was confessing. "And I think I've lost my only chance. I'd finally found a guy who seemed to be genuinely interested in me and I pushed him away because I had to figure out what was going on between us first." Rachel looked up and started to giggle bitterly and nervously. "But there has never been anything."

She took a moment to catch her breath after finishing. The soiree didn't start out as hoped and after the small vent, Rachel neither dared to speak. The champagne was still immersed in the ice and their dishes were untouched.

Rachel wanted to apologize. Apologize for, in a sense, blamed Brody and practically forced him to dine with her whatsoever.
She knew that she might not have to "explode" in that way, especially during their date, but she was kinda raised. As if that huge boulder that she felt on her stomach was gone.

"I'm sorry too."

Rachel looked shocked at the boy who had just spoken. Had she heard wrong or Brody was really apologizing?

"In part, it was me to push you to change when you didn't have to. Sometimes I admit of being too full of myself, that I don't realize that I act like a complete jerk, and I'm sorry for that."

Rachel doesn't believe she has ever been more stunned before. Never, never in the few years that she knew Brody, she had ever seen or heard him apologize. She almost began to think that he didn't even know what it meant to apologize. He had admitted he was wrong and now here he was, intent to ask for forgiveness. There wasn't a bit of sarcasm, humor, nothing. As odd it might be, he was truly sorry.

"And I'm sorry for failing to appreciate your natural beauty and for what it worths, I feel stupid for having put so much time to understand it and pray that you can make things work with this guy."

She smiled. It wasn't forced or fake. It was a real smile. A smile that had appeared for the first time in front of Brody. He could act as a womanizer but deep down, very very deep down, he was a good boy. His adjectives to woo a girl could improve, but she'd have thought about that later, or, preferably, on another occasion.
Both apologized for a full quarter of an hour until they realized that it was no longer necessary. As adults they were, they decided they had to turn the page and let the errors and misunderstandings behind.
They finished dinner as friends opening the bottle of champagne and chatting for the first real time and even if it still wasn't exactly what she had imagined, she was glad and relieved.
By now it was a night full of surprises so she remained indifferent when Brody confessed his feelings for their dance teacher, Cassandra.
He and Cassandra had a secret relationship for a few years until she decided to break up for not losing her job. Perhaps this was one of the reasons why Brody was a philanderer or perhaps simply because he liked to be one. The fact is that as time passed he still hadn't given up yet. It was never too late. He said. And he was right:

It wasn't too late.


"Finny c'mon dance with us!"

Carole took his son's hands wanting to bring him on the dance floor.

It was Saturday and the party wedding anniversary was now started by several hours and, as much as he wanted to be happy for his mother, Finn couldn't help but think about the girl he had invited.

"Mom really I'm fine. Go and have fun with Burt. I'll stay here and eat the cake." He forced a smile pretending to be happy with it, scratching his head. He didn't want to ruin this special day with his mood.

He waited until his mother went off to check for the millionth time his cell phone hoping to get a phone call or even just a message, but nothing.

It was pretty depressing. He was sitting all the time while everyone else was standing to have fun. His brother, Kurt, and Blaine went up on stage to sing a duet dedicated it to the two celebrated. They were all intent on listening with a blessed face. Even Puck had given a demeanor and wrapped his arm around Quinn's shoulder printing a light kiss on her temple.

It was weird.

Puck always said he didn't want a serious relationship and yet he was the first to settle down and live with his girlfriend while Finn was still waiting for a simple message from a girl he had just met.
Rachel was different from the others. There was something about her that he couldn't explain. He didn't want to admit it out loud, but he was afraid of having ruined his only shoot.

"Told you to do her."

Finn rolled his eyes and growled at his friend's voice. The song was ended and the DJ had put another of his records. He raised his eyes for a moment to note that Quinn had gone to the restroom leaving Puck alone to converse with him. Finn gazed at the floor hoping that in this way, Puck would leave him in his thoughts. Unfortunately he had to know that he was very insistent.

"Seriously dude. If she didn't came then it's her lost. Who cares if she isn't here."

"I care." Finn glared at him ominously as to silence him but all he received in return was an amused laugh.

"Chill I was just kidding. You should really get laid." Puck came up to him to make sure that no one heard it. "There's a blonde over there who does nothing but eat you with her eyes and, don't tell Quinn what I'm about to say but, those hooters are huge enough for your big hands."

"Blondes are not my type and boobs' size aren't the most important thing." Finn didn't even bother to turn to look at the girl in question answering with a monotone tone.

"Oh right, I forgot you prefer boobless brunette."

"Her boobs are perfect!" He didn't intended to shout, but Puck's comment against Rachel's body had pissed him off.

Suddenly the music stopped and everyone turned toward them. There was a brief silence before they all burst out laughing. Finn wanted to sink for the embarrassment and his face turned completely red. He had just scream the word "boob" in front of all his family, some unknown figure and his mother on top of all!
Honestly he didn't care that Rachel hadn't exactly a big bosom, indeed it was sure that it would fit perfectly in his hands. He immediately gave himself a slap in the head for having started to personify (personify? Was that the correct verb?) a girl like Rachel. She didn't deserve that boys talked about her in that way. She was, perfect. Screw what Puck thought. But a part of him couldn't help but think about how flawless Rachel's body was.

He was too busy to cover himself with his hands in shame to realize that he was left alone and that everyone had started to dance again while Blaine was intent on cheerfully greet a girl who had just arrived.


Other dancers may be on the floor
Dear but my eyes will see only you
Only you have the magic technique
When we sway I go weak

As Will, an old family friend, sang the same song he sang during the Burt and Carole's wedding all in pairs danced around the cute spouses.

Finn stood with his hands in his pockets contemplating the smile on his mother's face. He was content that Burt was a great husband. All he wanted was to see his mother happy and so she was. Despite all the times that Puck called him "Finnessa" he had never denied the fact that he hoped to start a family one day. He wanted to have a wife and a son to be proud of too. No wonder why Puck thought he was a sissy, but sees his future with a family of his own. Somebody to share the "happily ever after together" with.

"Your mom's beautiful."

"Yeah she is." Finn said almost in a whisper to himself. Only by analyzing best the voice belonged to made him turn abruptly to the person standing to his left.

From under his suit, which Kurt had forced him to wear, he felt goose bumps trying to metabolize fully what was going on.
He could hardly believe she was there. Almost didn't recognize her because of the new hairstyle and the makeup. She was still magnificent. He admired her adorable pink dress that showed off her long legs before crossing the eyes with the girl he was waiting for the all night unable to contain a goofy smile.

"Rachel."


He was really stunned to see her in front of him that he even had begun to lose all hope.

Rachel apologized for the delay but Finn didn't care. She came, and that was more than enough. She was the most beautiful girl on whom he had ever laid eyes on, and it didn't matter if he had just said now loudly, he thought it also the first time he saw her.
He awkwardly complimented her for her hair and with his amazement he learned that he had been the same Blaine to make her hair but he would have praised his brother's boyfriend later. For now, his priority was just one.

While Will sang the last verse of "Sway" Rachel and Finn were one side to the other, close enough to have the arms attached. They didn't open their mouths and let themselves be enveloped by the "quiet" that surrounded them. After a few minutes the music stopped again and from the stereo came out the notes of "Just the way you are" by Billy Joel. The two exchanged a glance before looking both embarrassed by the other side. It was as if they were back in high school which was a bit ridiculous considering they were both adults now and should be able to behave as such.

Don't go changing, to try and please me
You never let me down before

Both continued to look around vaguely, not knowing what to do. Rachel thought more than once and finally pulled out the courage to drag Finn without forewarning to the middle of the dance floor putting his hands on her waist and her arms around his neck, smiling tenderly.

"You said you'd show me your improvements with dancing."

Finn nodded amused before pulling Rachel closer to him. "I did. But don't get your hopes up."

Rachel pulled her head back laughing genuinely before twisting her fingers through Finn's hair.

I just want someone that I can talk to
I want you just the way you are

The lyrics echoed in Finn's head as if he spoke through that song. He didn't understand why he had decided to change, not that he was sorry, moreover he thought she was beautiful in any way.
Finn had a thousand questions in hid head but didn't want and couldn't ruin that magic environment that was created. It seemed that everything else around them had disappeared. He wanted to be able to live a moment like that over and over again, but despite his best efforts, he felt like the need to have explanations. Of course he wasn't no one to claim them but curiosity was eating him from the inside.

"Did you make up your mind?"

Finn's voice was almost inaudible but they were just a few inches away from each other so it was not difficult for Rachel to hear what he had asked.
For a close second her expression was puzzled, as if she didn't understand what he was talking about when the reality was that she was uncertain. Uncertain whether or not to tell everything to Finn. She was afraid that he would judge or make fun of her.
Rachel clung to him even stronger. She breathed slowly and swallowed her pride before starting to tell.

"Do you remember Mercedes?"


Finn didn't get angry. Didn't judge her or considered her a desperate either. He smiled. Only that. He admired her honesty and felt proud that she had managed to put order in her mind and tell him everything. He had time to develop whatever was between them and didn't care if he had to wait.

They swayed in time with the music unaware of all the looks and chatted until they no longer had a topic to talk about. Rachel rested her head on Finn's chest feeling his heart beat. If it had been for her, she could still spend her whole life listening to those palpitations; it had become maybe her favorite sound.
Rachel insisted to congratulate for the wedding anniversary of the parents of Finn, and to apologize for the intrusion despite Carole was more than happy that his son had brought a guest.
To be honest they were all happy to see that Finn was finally having fun and enjoying the party and, albeit Puck insisted with his lewd comments, Rachel couldn't ask for better than an evening like that to end the long past week.
When Kurt and Rachel have both discovered the passion for Broadway in common they isolated themselves from everyone else for confabulate animatedly and exchange opinions.
She turned to look at Finn smiling without a reason. She felt her heart melt and blushed when she saw that he had reciprocated her gaze with an amiable wink.

In the end, sending that video was the best decision she could have made.


6 years later

"Hello Mercedes."

"I really don't know how to start so uhm... About 6 years ago I sent a video to you asking for your help. You probably don't remember me since tons of girls send you messages but I do. I remember every single moment spent in that wonderful week. I was, nay am that girl with sweaters and long socks. After all these years I still wear my old clothes, not to go to work, by the way I'm finally part on a Broadway show. Sure, it's an off-Broadway show for now, but I'm working on it. Anyway I still wear my inevitable toddler dresses as you can see, but only at home or when I bring my son to the park. He loves them actually as well as my husband." She smiled after after naming her family.

"I.. I don't want to ramble as I always do, apparently I'm still the usual talkative." She said chuckling merrily and remained silent trying to work out the right words to say. "Without you I would never have realized that change is not so wrong. The important is to do it for the right reason even if that time that I did it was for the wrong one. I thought I'd ought to change to, you know get people to like me but when I met the one I realized that it wasn't necessary. I'd have to change only for myself, to feel better and, beautiful. That night I haven't had the opportunity to thank you properly. You have done so much for me and you weren't just a great help, but also a great friend." She said with tears in her eyes. "I'm not gonna cry this time I promise." She smiled despite the tears were now began to fall on her face. "I just wanna thank you from the bottom of my heart. For helping me to change but while striving to keep myself somehow."

"Babe! Christopher doesn't want me to feed him!" Yelled a male voice imploring with the tone of a child.

She couldn't hold back a laugh at the words of her husband as she wiped the tears away with her index.

"As you can hear I have to take care of not only my son but also my husband." She joked but it was then that she realized she was grateful to Mercedes also because without her, she probably would never have met the guy who was able to love her despite everything. The guy that every day repeated how much he loved her and that every morning kissed her whispering how beautiful she was even though she didn't have any make-up on and all her hair was disheveled. After such a long wait she had that someone she craved for, who looked at her as if she were the best thing ever happened to him.

"It's better if I go now." She said after a moment's pause. "I'll never forget your help, your advices and most of all, you. Thank you. Thank you so much."

"Oh.." Added immediately before turning off the camera. "In case you don't you remember, my name is Rachel. Rachel Barbra Hudson-Berry."