Kate woke up that morning feeling like it would not be a particularly good day. Her alarm clock was flashing 5:47 in bright red numbers, and Kate could see the sun peeking through her window. She heaved herself out of bed, bare feet touching the soft carpet. She'd have to wake up at six anyway, so she decided that there was no point in going back to sleep. It was coffee time.

Since she and Josh had broken up, it felt almost like a relief to wake up in an empty and silent apartment. It was the only place Kate considered her own, her safe space. Her apartment was her quiet place where she could gather her thoughts and relax. She took a long sip for her freshly filled NYPD mug, savoring the bitter taste and the silence of her apartment, until her cellphone beeped loudly, jarring her from her peace and quiet.

"Beckett," she answered hoarsely, her voice still coated in sleep.

"It's Ryan." Kate sighed. I haven't even finished my coffee yet. "We got a body. 6th and Downing." Only a few blocks away.

"Give me twenty minutes." As soon as Ryan hung up, Kate dialed Castle's number, hesitating for a minute before calling him. It was early, but she knew he would want in on her case.

"Detective Beckett." He had clearly been asleep. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"How quickly can you get to 6th and Downing?"

"Give me half an hour." Kate hung up and exhaled. Dead body and it's barely six o'clock. It's gonna be a long day.

X

Kate stepped out of the car to nearly blinding sunlight. 6th and Downing was a chaotic intersection and she could see a crowd surrounding the yellow tape barricade. Castle had beaten her to the intersection despite the fact that he lived much further away, and was waiting with two coffees in hand. She took one of them and he immediately started jabbering away.

"Dead body on Downing Street… I'm trying to think of a joke, but it's not quite coming." Kate rolled her eyes at him. A car was crumpled against a telephone pole, and Kate could see police officers examining the car carefully. She and Castle started towards the car, until Lanie came running towards them. Kate's heart immediately dropped to the sidewalk and she stopped.

"Kate, don't," Lanie pleaded.

"Why?"

"You don't need to see him."

"Lanie?"

"Kate, just trust me." Kate stared into Lanie's sad eyes.

"Lanie, I'm a cop. I can handle a dead body." Lanie grabbed Kate's shoulder.

"Kate, don't –" Kate shrugged the hand off and walked towards the body. The officers let her under the tape as she flashed her badge, but she walked to the driver's side window to examine the man lying bloodied in the car. She heard footsteps and Castle caught up to her. Kate squinted, trying to examine the man's injuries.

"We got an ID?" she asked to whoever was around her. The man was in his mid-sixties, and in pretty good shape. There was probably someone missing him.

"Sure, Lanie pulled his wallet," one of the surrounding officers said. "His name's… Jim Beckett." Kate's heart plummeted.

"Let me see that," she snapped at the officer, swiping the license from his hand and turning it over. To her horror, the face staring up at her was one she knew far too well. She backed away from the crime scene, coming to rest on the nearby wall and she fell back against it. Tears were burning her eyes, but she held them back, trying to keep up her tough cop exterior. Her chest was heaving and she could feel herself gasping for breath. Castle was by her side immediately.

"Kate?" he said cautiously. Without a word, Kate handed him the license. He flipped the license up and nearly dropped it in surprise. "Oh, Kate. I'm –"

"Don't," she snapped. "Don't even… start…" She was gasping for air. "Don't… tell me… how sorry… you are." The tears were oozing down her cheeks, and she tried to rub them away. "He's… my… dad… and he's… he's…" She broke down completely, sobs shaking her thin body and echoing through the still air. Without thinking, Castle took her in his arms and squeezed her as tightly as he could. He pressed her head to his shoulder and stroked her hair repeatedly as she sobbed, not knowing what else to do or say. The only sound coming from the duo was Kate's guttaral cries of pure unfiltered pain. Lanie walked over and put a hand on Castle's shoulder.

"I got it, Rick," she whispered. Wordlessly, Castle unwrapped himself from Kate and guided her to the medical examiner. Kate crumpled against Lanie's scrubs and Lanie grabbed her tightly.

"Hey, Beckett. I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere." Lanie jerked her head to the side, gesturing for Castle to make himself scarce. He turned and walked back to the crime scene, where Ryan and Esposito were examining the car.

"Hey!" he shouted angrily.

"Chill, Castle," Esposito said. "What's up?"

"What the hell? Why'd you call Beckett?"
"Dude, she's the best detective in the 12th," Ryan answered.

"You called her to investigate her father's death!" Castle screamed, and Esposito dropped his notebook in shock.

"What?" Ryan turned a bright shade of red. "I called her to her dad's crime scene?" Castle nodded. "Shit." Esposito whacked him on the shoulder. "Where is she?"

"Don't bother," Castle responded. "Lanie's got her. The only thing we can do to help her is figure out who did this." The two detectives nodded and returned to examining every square inch of the car.

X

After about ten minutes, Kate slumped to the ground, her chest still heaving. She had stopped crying, but hadn't said a word. Lanie sat down next to her.

"Kate, honey –" Kate held up a hand, cutting off the M.E.

"Don't," she whispered hoarsely. "Just… he's dead." Lanie nodded, and put a hand on her shoulder.

"I know, honey."

"I'm… I'm all alone."

"Oh, honey," Lanie murmured. "You are not ever alone. You have me, and the boys, and Castle. You are never alone." She ran a hand through the detective's hair. "I love you, Kate, and I will always be there for you. Anything you need." Kate twisted and looked at Lanie through teary eyes.

"I need you to find out why my dad was in a car accident." Lanie nodded, and Kate stood, rubbing a hand across her cheeks. "I can't be here." Before Lanie could say a word, Kate turned and walked back to her car. Unfortunately, or fortunately as the case may have been, Castle was waiting for her. "What do you want, Castle?"

"I want to do whatever you need me to do," the writer answered, his hands extended in a gesture of friendliness.

"Castle, I need you to leave me the fuck alone."

"Kate –"

"I need you to move out of my way and let me go home." Castle stepped aside and Kate quickly opened the door, stepped in it and drove away.

X

An hour later, Kate was dressed in sweats and running on her treadmill. It was jacked up as fast as it would go and she was completely winded, but the pain in her legs was covering up the pain that had drilled its way into her soul. She kept herself focused on the rhythmic thumping of her feet on the belt, until her doorbell rang. With a groan she turned the treadmill off, and jumped off to the floor. She wiped the sweat from her forehead and went over to the door, pressing her eye to the peephole. A groan escaped her lips when she saw who was standing there.

"Castle, piss off." The writer didn't move, instead staring directly at the porthole with his hands behind his back. "Castle, go home!"

"No," he said back, bring his hands forward. Kate felt tears in her eyes at the sight of the small bouquet of flowers in his hand, and despite herself, she unlocked the door and opened it. He immediately let himself in, and squeezed her into a hug. Though shocked for a second, Kate felt herself relaxing into his grip. "How are you?" She didn't even answer, instead wrapping her arms around him and gripping the back of his shirt tightly. "It's okay," he whispered, stroking her back gently. "I'm not leaving." Despite herself, she broke down in his arms and sobbed into his chest. "I'm not going anywhere."

"I'm s-scared, Castle."

"I know, Kate. I know."

"I'm alone."

"You and I both know that's bullshit. I've been following you around for four years now, so you have to know that you at least have me around to pull your pigtails." Kate looked up at him through tears, and Castle gently rubbed his thumb across her cheek. "I'm here for you, always. I will do anything that you need, even nothing, if that's what you want."

"A hug will work for now," she said, and Castle immediately pulled her into him.

"Hugs I can handle."