The characters of Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Watson are not owned by the author. This story was written for the non-profit purpose of entertainment.
"Ah, come in Watson."
"By Jove, Holmes! How did you know it was me?"
"You favored the leg that suffered your old war wound as you ascended the steps, Watson. I should think after all these years identifying your gait should be elementary."
"By Jove, Holmes! You can be dashed annoying, what? I was walking extra quiet, hoping to fool you this time. Yet my footsteps still gave me away?"
"That and I saw you from the window as you entered the building, old fellow."
"Holmes! That's cheating!"
"Nonsense, Watson. Observing isn't cheating."
"Well, call it what you like, but I'm off to the Jake, excuse me won't you?"
"Certainly Watson."
"Egad! Holmes!"
"Yes, Watson, what is it?"
"The toilet! The bloody toilet is missing! What the devil?"
"Ah, I wondered when you'd notice. Yes, it's the most perplexing thing isn't it?"
"What the devil happened to it, Holmes?"
"Haven't the slightest clue, old fellow. When I returned home after my luncheon, it was gone. I've been wracking my brains about it all afternoon."
"But Holmes, surely there must be some clues?"
"I'm sorry Watson. At the moment I have nothing to go on."