"So..."The Author said, standing in front of an empty auditorium, one he knew would soon be filled, at least somewhat. The Author was nervous, for he was ready to show off his small idea, but the idea of Naruto and Sasuke fused... it would not go over well with most fans of the manga.
But the Author shrugged, and snapped his fingers, a large stack of papers appearing onto a podium.
"Today, my friends, I'd like to read to you a story, one of an Uzumaki Naruto, an Uchiha Sasuke, and the large cast of their friends. This will be a humorous story, with multiple jabs at popular theories and the newest chapters and episodes in the fandom. My fellow fanfic readers: I present to you, Naruske... or would it be Saruto?"
--
'Twas a fierce battle.
A ball of red energy, called chakra, met a crackling fist of electrity and the same energy.
This was the fight of two friends, rivals, and brothers, even, although they weren't related to each other.
Uzumaki Naruto, son of Kazama Arashi... or, well, he's really Namikaze Minato, and Uzumaki Kushina. Master of the Shadow Clone Jutsu, and self proclaimed future Hokage.
Uchiha Sasuke, son of Uchiha Fugaku and Mikoto, the leaders of the Uchiha clan. Master of a couple of fire-based jutsu and recently the Sharingan, his bloodline. The self proclaimed future killer of Itachi, his blood brother.
These two met in a final clash of power, their demonic forms visible from the flash of light that was created by the chakra.
BOOM
The two energies met, and all went black.
--
3 days later
--
An eye opened, followed by its twin.
A room of white and that meant only one thing.
"A hospital?"
The voice that came out of his mouth was deeper than normal, but something told him it should have been even deeper.
He looked over, seeing a daisy in a glass jar on the bedside table.
"Flowers? Sakura, probably. Maybe Ino, or Hinata."The boy said the last two names as an afterthought, as if two voices in his head said the names at the same time, leaving the teen confused.
This ended soon, though, as a growl of hunger sounded from the boy's belly.
"I'm hungry...I'm gonna go get some ramen!"the boy said. He looked at himself, seeing he was in hospital clothes and bandages, but no restraints. The boy giggled sneakily, and began to get out of bed. He made his way over to the window, and climbed out it, thanking his ninja skills as he made his way to the ground.
Once there, he noted a couple of odd looks from villagers. The girls seemed to be starry-eyed, while the men looked jealous.
This puzzled the boy, as he made his way to Ichiraku's ramen stand.
"One miso and pork ramen, please."The old man nodded, not even turning around to greet him. Ayame, on the other hand, had stopped sweeping the inside, and was staring at the boy, blushing.
"W-who are you?" she stuttered, flushing heavily.
The boy gave her a quizzical look.
"You know me, Ayame. I come here every day!" the boy said, as he ramen had suddenly made it in front of him, Tuechi just twisting backwards to hand it to him.
The boy knew this was a good sign. The man was working on a new recipe.
"Itadakimsu!" the boy said, as he broke a pair of chopsticks and began to eat.
He had to deal with Ayame's flustered attempts to make a conversation the whole time, but he didn't care. It was great to have someone to talk to.
"Thank you for the meal."
The boy got up, left a card on the table, which was his ninja account where money could be taken out of, and left. The old man would take care of it until he got back, or at least Ayame would.
"Guess it's time to go home, now, then,"the boy said, as he began to walk away.
Then, the oddest thing happened. One leg went one way, and the other leg went to a completely different street. And as what always happens when one loses his footing, he fell hard on his buttocks.
The boy shot back up, and sighed.
"Maybe I'm not so healed, after all. Guess I'm delirious" the boy said, as he turned back to the hospital.
Normally, he'd just wait for his body to heal, but right now, it just seemed to much of a hassle to do.
So the boy went back the way he had come, catching more looks from people he wasn't used too, and was all at the same time.
He went back up the wall the way he came down, and was in the hall of the hospital. Nurses and doctors moved around quickly, paying no mind to a ninja patient, the kind that wouldn't lay still.
The boy then went up to the attendant's desk. The person there was a large man, hairy faced and bulky, with small sausages for fingers.
"Hi, sir, I'm looking for my room. You see, I needed to get up and walk about, but I lost my way, can you please tell it to me?" the boy asked, putting on the pest innocently sweet face he could.
The large gruff man nodded.
"Your name?"
The boy nodded, and opened his mouth.
"Uzumaki Naruto/Uchiha Sasuke!" Two voices, and two names came out of his mouth at the same time, creating a jumbled mess of evil sounding words to come from the boys mouth. The man, however, was weirded out, and was about to call the mental ward to pick up another patient.
Luckily for the boy, who was confused right now, the 5th Hokage, Tsunade, came down the hall.
"Oi, you... we need to talk."
The boy nodded, and followed the blonde, busty lady into the room he had woken up in.
He sat down in a chair, and waited.
"Here... first things first...here's a mirror. It's good you're sitting down, because... Naruto... Sasuke? You're in the same body."