Dedicated to: my SM ( if you're reading )
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto in any way possible.
Author's Note: I've just finished reading the manga. I haven't really made myself sensitive to the inner feelings of the characters which can cause the failure of this story. Vagueness is everywhere but I prefer it to be that way. Errors might be spotted, forgive me for that. It's somewhat angsty - the exact opposite of Naruto's personality, but I'm crossing my fingers the feelings will get across. Please leave reviews; I need tons of them.
05/23/12 - I don't know if it is safe to say this is NaruSaku, but I just want to warn you that it may not meet your expectations. Thanks to Anon for pointing that out.
Stay
I'll stay for her.
She'll stay for him.
He'll stay for her.
If perfection exists in every equation, then these three statements might just fall into that perfect category. Too bad, perfection is unreality.
The third statement is actually void considering he never cares for her. If he does, then he will stay for her. She will never have to drown herself in despair because of his absence. She will never have to feign happiness. She will never have to resort into finding someone else who can be a replacement for him. I will never have to be just an option.
On a lighter note, at least for once, I've managed to cross the boundary of our friendship and well, she's met me halfway. Whether it's with her welcoming arms or not, I've turned a blind eye to it.
" Sakura-chan!" I call out. I see her walking down the street, her back facing me, perhaps headed to the Konoha Hospital. Maybe it's not too much to ask for some of her time to be willingly spent on me.
I deserve that much.
She turns around and sighs. If I'm not sharp enough, I can care less about that sigh. Too bad I am, and her sigh just seems to be the most disappointing sight I've ever seen.
Meeting me, maybe, is inopportunity to her.
She starts approaching me as I wait. She stops few steps away keeping some distance. The pain that the gesture usually casts on me has dulled over the few years since our relationship started to blur. There has since been a hollow expanse between us, and our conversations have almost faded into nothing but remoteness.
" Hang out with me, will you? I heard there's a new ramen flavour at Ichiraku so I'm wondering if you want to go with me and – "
" Naruto, I'm busy. With the new plague that has broken out, and some paper works, and some mission requests from other villages, not to mention, Tsunade-shishou sending me – "
" Oh, yeah. It's kinda obvious. Look at you, you're like a walking shit and – "
She glares at me. It relieves me being able to force out a reaction from her. Good thing, she still has some issues about her physical appearance – though she really looks fine to me – or else, my cracking of a joke will be ineffective.
" Oops. Yeah, I know. But few doses of sleep won't really hurt you, you know,"
" Next time, then, Naruto. See you!" and she leaves.
Believing her reasons or not is the least of my worries; keeping my hopes up whenever she says next time tops the list.
Because ever since we became more than that, there never has been a next time for us.
…
I'm happy, and I'm happier knowing that she's happy.
Months after my frustrated plan of taking her out to Ichiraku, Sasuke finally decided to return home to Konoha.
Of course, things haven't been so easy. He was supposed to be executed because he was a rogue ninja, not to mention, he was deemed to be an international criminal, but Tsunade has been lenient enough to not throw him into the death hole. Of course, the disturbing truth behind the Uchiha massacre was revealed to the council and was thoroughly discussed and argued over. This was considered in making the decision about Sasuke's return.
Needed not to say, we – all those who are related to Sasuke in one way or another – were also asked for our opinions regarding the matter.
Uchiha Sasuke is still my best friend, and that's enough emphasis to speak out my say on the matter. What more if it's Sakura? Granny Tsunade surely knows what's going on inside her mind and heart. In the end, it was decided he would be under probation for months and things would start from there.
After all the talks and commotions that have transpired in the village – for Sasuke's return has brought a wave of anxiety towards the villagers – the issue is finally dying out as the longed-for welcoming fades in from the background.
There are indeed some things that will never change despite the times and troubles that can potentially mar the almost sugar-coated relationships established in this world.
And I'm grateful to say that the Team 7 is complete once again.
I want to preserve this bonding that Kakashi-sensei, Sasuke, Sakura and I share. I want to protect it knowing it's still flimsy. I can't risk everyone's happiness for my own selfish reasons.
But…just another try before I stop.
I trudge my way towards Sakura's office. Again, I'm trying my luck to at least have a portion of her time. I already talked with Granny Tsunade to give her a short break from all those works. Of course she was critical of my request, but with my charm and all, she couldn't have said no.
I open the door with a loud bang.
" Surprise! Oh, don't give me that look, Sakura-chan. I'm pretty sure you aren't that busy anymore, so maybe we can drop by at Ichiraku?" I grin, scratching the back of my head.
" Let me see...I have an appointment in an hour, and then I'm scheduled to check on some patients, I'll be working on their – "
" It's okay, Sakura-chan. I've already talked with Granny. She's given you a break. Ha. You owe me big time!" I plaster yet another goofy smile to lighten the atmosphere. I know she really isn't in the mood to come with me. Hell, she's never in the mood.
She heaves a defeated sigh, and she suddenly looks disconsolate.
" Okay then…" she says as she starts packing up her things and listlessly heads for the door.
I catch up to her and suddenly feel guilty for forcing all of this on her. I want to take her out because I want to see her smile, to relieve her from the stress, and to prove myself that it is in my capability to be a source of her happiness.
But perhaps my capability of being one will never get through her, much less satisfy her.
"Kakashi-sensei is on a mission right now so he certainly cannot go. But don't worry, I'll call up Sasuke-teme and if I have to drag his ass over here, I will, just so he won't have reasons to refuse. How's that?" I laugh. Fake it is or not, it doesn't matter much.
I see how her ears perk and her eyes shine at my proposition. I know she longs to talk to him. From what I know, they haven't engaged in any hearty conversation yet since he came back. They need a little push, and being the heroic best friend, I volunteer to give them that. Even when I'm not okay.
" Thank you, Naruto."
She smiles at me, and I know I've done the right thing.
…
Their relationship is getting more stable and better.
My relationship with her is – well, we're still friends.
I see them together a lot. Sometimes, even when the team doesn't have any reunion, they still frequent Ichiraku or just hang out somewhere.
Sakura isn't really the one to fawn over him perceptibly like the way she used to when we were still genins, but I can see her eyes teeming with affection for him. Sasuke has kept a blasé face every time though he smirks or furrows his eyebrow occasionally. If lucky, I can even see him smile, giving Sakura a sidelong glance. I know he has softened, and it won't take long before Sakura melts all the hatred he's been nursing.
It won't take long before the two of them get their happy ending.
I'm training at the same time perfecting a new jutsu in this training ground where Kakashi-sensei taught us the beginnings of a ninja when I see her coming toward me. I expect Sasuke to be following her, but there's no other person around.
She wears an expression full of remorse.
" Sakura-chan!" I smile even though I have a premonition that this – whatever we have – is finally going to end wintrily.
" Naruto…" she starts. She focuses her eyes on the ground.
"I understand."
I place my hand on her shoulder and pull her into a hug.
"I'm sorry, Naruto. I didn't mean to. God, you didn't deserve it. I wasn't fair to you. You did your part, but I only shoved you away. I'm sorry…" her shoulders tremble; she's crying.
" When I accepted the deal, I already knew it wasn't really going to work out the way I wanted it to be. Well, I won't be a hypocrite and say, it's perfectly okay, because the truth is, I kind of expect you to give me that much, and yeah…it hurts. But, I only wish for your happiness, Sakura. If by staying at your side – when that jerk wasn't around – I can make you temporarily happy, then I'm willing to take the fall," I stroke her hair, shushing her.
She pulls back and cups my cheeks.
" You deserve someone better, Naruto. And I'll be the happiest best friend when you find your true happiness. Thank you, Naruto," she chuckles lightly as she embraces me.
After a few more exchange of warm words and some sorry's and thank you's, she turns to leave.
I feel like a burden has been lifted from my heart. True, it's difficult seeing the one I've always loved walk away when I've been ready to sacrifice everything just to stay for her and make her stay for me, but I realize that love requires more than just mutual feelings. The understanding unselfishly given by one and letting go of the person he loves at the perfect time prove to be more rational proofs of love than his having reciprocated passion.
Who knows, maybe someone out there will stay with me until the end of time. Maybe, someday I will also be loved the way I love Sakura or even more than that.
Suddenly, a figure comes out from behind a tree. I stare at the girl with the lavender eyes.
A pastel of red is painted across her cheeks as she fiddles with her fingers.
" Naruto-kun. Ah…I – I want to…Can we eat together a-at Ichiraku?" she speaks softly as she finally meets my gaze.
I titter. How funny it is being the one invited to eat at my favorite ramen restaurant when I used to be the first one to invite before.
With the lingering thought in my head, I smile warmly at Hinata.
" Sure."
...
Fin.