If you don't want it then

You could at least pretend that the papers your soul and your blood's in the pen

And maybe then you could see the truth you had to write


Itachi had never seen anymore more pretty in his entire life. Well, no one besides his mother, of course. She was always number one in his eyes.

But this woman with such beautiful red hair... She was gorgeous. And she was nice, too.

"Itachi, this is Kushina. My best friend," Itachi's mother said to Itachi. "Like Shisui?" He asked, with a squeak in his small voice. His mother was holding him in her arms so that he was at the same height as both of the women before him, and nodded at him. "Yes, like Shisui," She turned to the woman named Kushina, and started saying something about ready to have another one.

Another what?

Itachi's small mind didn't dwell on it, however. He was too young to really know what it was that they were talking about. The only thing he could concentrate on was the length and luster of Kushina's hair. He wanted to reach out and touch it, to see if it was really as soft as it looked. He restrained himself as best as he could though. Father had told him to mind himself today, or else he would be in trouble.

It's not like he was a troublesome child, anyway. His father was just very strict. So he instead admired Kushina's hair from afar, even though he could reach out and touch it from this distance.

They continued to talk for a while longer, and Itachi started to squirm a little. It wasn't that he was uncomfortable or anything, his patience was just wearing a little thin. His mother must have noticed, because she quickly turned her attention to the dark haired boy. And the woman with red hair did as well.

"Tell me, Itachi, how old are you?" Kushina asked, bending down so that they met eye to eye. A small blush rose on his cheeks as he raised a hand, signaling that he was four years old. "You're practically a man then!" She smiled, her eyes glistening. She was just so pretty.

His hand was still extended out, and it went to go touch her face to see if her skin was really as soft as it looked. Before his hand could make it to its destination, though, he was stopped short by Kushina taking his hand into hers.

Her hands were so warm.

Staring at her with wide, curious eyes, he watched her give him something called "the cootie shot." He had no idea what it meant, but he was afraid it had to do with needles. He didn't like those, and he became frightened rather quickly doing everything in his power to get away from her. Before he had the chance to realize that she was done and that there were no needles required, she had already given him back his hand and was smiling the same as before. "There, now you're safe from me!" She said in a sing-song voice.

He didn't fully understand, but went along with it anyway. Kushina's attention was once again torn away from him and to his smiling mother, talking about how smart he was and how he was going into the academy that year. He didn't really care that they were still talking, though.

He still just wanted to reach out and touch Kushina's exotic red hair.

Despite what his father had told him earlier, he reached out to do exactly that. He would deal with the consequences that come with wanting his desires to be fulfilled.

He had stretched just far enough to get a few strands of hair in his grasp before either one of the two women noticed what he was doing. Kushina stared at him with a shocked look on her face and Itachi didn't dare look at his mother. He knew better than to do that.

He was busted. He couldn't have the privilege to feel her hair. He had messed up big time, so he immediately started to apologize, but it sounded more like a bunch of words being mixed together in a rush.

He expected to be scolded right then and there as well, but what happened was different from what was predicted.

Kushina stepped forward with a chunk of her hair for Itachi to grab. He looked up at her with wondering eyes, and she nodded at him with her eyes smiling, saying that it was okay, and he smiled fully for the first time.


Gasping, Itachi woke up from the dream that he was having. He had forgotten about that memory until now, for his mind never let him have a dreamless night. It was also unfortunate that he never had the same dream twice. Maybe it was just his guilt weighing down on him. Yeah. That was probably it.

Sighing, he got up from his position on the cool, hard earth. It had of been sometime before dawn, because there wasn't any dew on the grass yet and he wasn't shivering from the cold. Not yet anyway.

He scanned his surroundings lightly, taking note of the fire that had now practically gone out completely and the absence of his partner. He was probably still out on a watch or scouting the area. Probably both, knowing him.

It was thanks to that, that he was able to lean back against a nearby tree and muse over his dream. He always did this, and he didn't know why. Remembering things that he would much rather forget seemed to be one of his recently acquired past-times. It just had to of been.

He remembered that woman quite well. The mother of the Kyuubi container, Naruto, and the best friend of his now deceased mother. If he remembered correctly, she had died only a year or two after meeting her. It was saddening, to say the least.

There wasn't a need to feel sorry for the guy; he had never known his own mother so there wasn't really much to miss. But Itachi had known her for good two and half years. He remembered that every year on his birthday, she made his favorite treat.

Kushina Uzumaki's homemade dango was to die for. It had been the best thing he had ever tasted, and no one has been able to compare to her cooking skills. There was no way of knowing how she made it, for her recipe probably died alongside her. Sad, but true.

Not only that, but the hours that she allowed him to play with her long, red hair. It was so beautiful and if he had the ability to fall in love that would have been what he fell in love with. Her and her hair.

But that changed when the Kyuubi had attacked Konoha. He had found out that Kushina had died, and he had been devastated to a degree. Not as much as his mother (losing her best friend and all) but over the fact he would never be able to joke with her or play with her hair again.

So he silently made a vow to never cut his own hair ever again. And he lived up to that vow. He had grown it out for years, in memory of her. And he kept it that way ever since. No one ever questioned him about it either, which was surprising.

His partner had asked him why he had kept it so long in the first place. It may have gotten in the way on several occasions, but he couldn't bear to cut it for whatever reason. He had no more ties to anyone besides his brother, so he could have cut it anytime that he wanted.

But then again, he couldn't. Because of that vow. And the fact that every time he saw blood (Every day, almost) he was reminded of why he kept it that long. It was for her. The first person he fell in love with.

Not in the sense of romance, however. No. He loved her kindness and the way she greeted him every time she saw him and the hugs she gave him right before she left to go home and "tend to her husband," as she would put it.

Sighing again, he turned his gaze to the sky, wondering what could have happened if things weren't so complicated. If Madara had died as he should have many years ago, leaving him and everyone else in peace.

But no, that couldn't have happened because everything in his life had always been screwed up. Always always always.

He groaned and closed his eyes once more, leaning into the tree. He would try to sleep again, knowing with full awareness that rest would not come. He did it for the chance that he might be able to see the red hair one more time, before it was gone for good.


Hi, my name is I've Been Awake Since 11 A.M. Yesterday And It's Five Thirty In The A.M. And I Go Through My Tumblr Looking For Inspiration.

A single picture on tumblr inspired me to write this, and didn't bother to really edit any of this, so sorry. Uh. Yeah. I really hope you liked this little oneshot /hearts

The song lyrics at the begining are "Will You Smile Again?" by ... And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Dead

Don't favorite and run! Reviews are nice, I usually respond, and I don't bite:D