The 12 Days of Christmas
--On The First Day of Christmas, My True Love Gave To Me!--
Disclaimer: Naruto is not mine! Nor is the song. Merry Christmas!
"On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me! A partridge in a pear tree!! On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me!! Two turtle doves and a partridge in a pear tree!!! On the third day of Christmas, my true gave to me! Three French hens, two turtle MMMFFFFGGH!!!!" Naruto's loud off key singing was cut off by a pillow thrown at him by an angry Sasuke; Naruto fell down with a flurry of feathers. Sakura breathed a sigh of relief and thanked Sasuke. Naruto pulled off the pillow and snarled at the Uchiha, spitting out feathers once in a while. "I invite you graciously to my house and you throw a pillow at me!? Much less a pillow with a hole in it!?"
Sasuke crossed his arms angrily. "You didn't graciously invite me; you went over to my house, grabbed me by the collar and dragged me here kicking, unwillingly. By the way, that's your Christmas present." He said, pointing at the pillow. "Treat it with respect or I'll see to it that you regret it." He finished, narrowing his eyes for more effect. Everyone sweat dropped at the Uchiha's tactics. Sakura stood up. "Well Naruto, that's my cue to leave! See you all tomorrow!" She went out the door extremely quickly.
Sasuke and Naruto blinked after her. Then directed their attention to each other with loathing eyes.
"Teme."
"Dope."
"Teme."
"Dope."
"Kisama."
"Hn."
"HEY! DON'T 'HN' ME!!"
Sasuke stood up and ran a hand through his hair. "I'm going home. I don't have time to waste with you." Naruto scowled at him and flailed his arms. "WASTING TIME!? I WASTE TIME TALKING TO YOU!! NOBODY WASTES TIME TALKING TO ME!! EVERYONE WASTES TIME TALKING TO –OOOFF!!" Naruto took another pillow to the face, and Sasuke walked out the door.
He scowled at the large amounts of Christmas Carols he heard as he walked home. Sure, he liked Christmas, but he was not in a very Christmas-sy mood if you get his drift. Sighing again, he shut his eyes and walked into his house, expecting his front door when… WHAM!
He staggered back, pinching his nose to prevent a nosebleed, and opened his eyes. What greeted him seemed to be a large pear tree. He raised his eyebrow. "Why the hell is there a freaking pear tree in front of my lawn!?" A small sound brought his attention to the branches of the pear tree. He visibly twitched when he saw the fat partridge sitting there. Scanning the large tree again, he noticed a note pinned to the trunk and he ripped it off.
"On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me a partridge in a pear tree!"
Sasuke twitched at turned his glaze to the fat bird. Annoyed by its beady stare, he shot it a scathing death glare. The bird just blinked stared its… beady stare. Sasuke gave it an even more scathing glare. The bird stared back. After a long staring match, Sasuke looked away and started rubbing his eyes. "ALRIGHT BIRD! YOU WIN THIS ROUND!" He screamed it, pointing at the partridge. The partridge just… blinked. Sasuke threw up his hands in frustration and walked into his house.
Nearby, a girl giggled and skipped away.
--On The Second Day of Christmas, My True Love Gave To Me!--
"Ohayo Sasuke-teme! HEY! I SAID OHAYO!!! …You rude bastard…" Naruto mumbled when Sasuke just walked by him. He stopped walking and turned around. "Hey, Naruto." Naruto blinked, surprised. "Hm? What does he want? He hardly asks me anything." "How more days until Christmas dope?" Naruto snickered. "Haha! The great Uchiha Sasuke knows all types of Jutsu, but he doesn't know how many days until Christmas! Hahahaha! Oh that's funny!!" Sasuke narrowed his eyes angrily. "Tell me or die."
"Thereare12moredaysuntilChristmas! Don'tkillmeplease!!" Naruto quickly blurted out, scrambling to the top of a roof. Sasuke blinked at the Kyuubi vessel's antics. "You know…" He started flatly after a few seconds. "…I wasn't being serious about killing you." Naruto blinked and leapt down from the roof, chuckling sheepishly. "Of course I knew that Sasuke-teme. What do you think I'm stupid?" "Yes, as a matter of fact. I do." Naruto snorted.
"I'm not as stupid as you! Not knowing how many days until Christmas!"
"Don't talk back!"
"STUPID TEME!!"
"DON'T TALK BACK!!"
"Hey, what's going on?"
Both boys turned their attention to Sakura who was standing there, looking confused. Sasuke then waved at Sakura that was followed by a hesitant "Ohayo Sakura." Both Naruto and Sakura stared at him like he was insane. Heck, he even stared at himself like he was insane. He never greeted anyone, not even his teammates.
Insert the awkward silence here.
Sasuke tried to say something but a bunch of unintelligible mumbles left his mouth. "Uhh… umm… I didn't… Hehehe…" "There goes my pride…" He fought back an urge to smash his head into a conveniently placed wall until hell froze over. Naruto, overcome by the amount of 'Sasuke Out of Characterness', fainted clean away. Sasuke turned tail and started power walking away, his hands stuffed as far as possible into pockets. Sakura stood there blinking, then remembered something and ran off.
Sasuke started walking home, once again closing his eyes, expecting to meet the front steps of his house. "WWAAGGGHH!" A strangled scream exited the Uchiha's mouth as he stumbled over a golden cage. "AAGH!" He screamed again when he went crashing head first into a tree after stumbling over the cage. "Oof!" He fell on the ground on his butt. Sasuke quickly stood up, looking around to see if anyone had seen this. Seeing no one, he turned his angry glare to the golden cage, which was now dented and another pear tree.
The cage contained two turtledoves. The pear tree had another partridge. Sasuke went over to the cage and opened it, freeing the two turtledoves. Eyeing the tree, he found another note pinned to the trunk. This time it read…
"On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me two turtledoves and a partridge in a pear tree!"
He read the note over and over again. "I think I know this song! Just what's the next thing I get!?" He tapped his chin, frowning. "Three what? Three flying frogs? No, that's not it… Three paper cranes? That isn't it either… Three fat snoring flabs of fat? No…" He crossed his arms and thought so hard his head hurt. Disregarding the fact, he decided to save the thinking for tomorrow.
--On The Third Day of Christmas, My True Love Gave To Me!--
"Konichiwa Sasuke-teme!" Naruto greeted Sasuke "Three baked clams? No. Three hairy monkeys? Aren't monkeys hairy already? So no. Three dried squids? Bleah no." Naruto blinked at the rambling Sasuke. "An-Ano… Sasuke?" Sasuke frowned and scratched his peacock fro. He then noticed Naruto.
"Ah Naruto! Just the person I need to talk to now!" He said, realizing how completely out of character he was. Naruto looked visibly shaken now. "WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO SASUKE-TEME!?" Naruto finally screamed, pointing at Sasuke over and over again. Sasuke smacked Naruto in the head. Naruto recovered quickly, rubbed his head and screamed at Sasuke again. "YOU SUCK SASUKE!!" "Now Naruto, I don't think it's nice to say that someone sucks."
Naruto now pointed at Sakura. "How long have you been there!?" Sakura crossed her arms and smirked. Sasuke twitched and screamed at Sakura, "SMIRKING IS MY THING!!" Sakura and Naruto both blinked at him. "Sasuke-kun? Have you taking your medication?" Sasuke looked angry. "I DON'T HAVE MEDICATION!!" Everyone blinked at him. He flung up his arms. "This is stupid! I'm going home!!"
"Third day was what!? I STILL DON'T KNOW!!" He kept his eyes open this time. He leapt past the cage, avoiding the tree as well. "HA HA! You didn't NAGGHH!!" Sasuke slipped on some eggs that were laid by… three French hens. He stood up quickly and screeched into the sky. "ALRIGHT THAT'S IT! IT'S WAR!!"
He stormed into his house, his entire backside covered in eggs. A note fell to the floor, it read:
"On the third day of Christmas, my true love gave to me three French hens, two turtledoves, and a partridge in a pear tree."
--On The Fourth Day of Christmas, My True Love Gave To Me--
"Four calling birds, three French hens, two turtledoves, and a partridge in a pear tree."
"Shut up. Shut up! SHUT UP!!" Sasuke screamed the four calling birds that were croaking out Merry Christmas over and over again. They didn't listen.
--On The Fifth Day of Christmas, My True Love Gave To Me--
"FIVE GOLDEN RINGS! Four calling birds, three French hens, two turtledoves, and a partridge in a pear tree."
Sasuke frowned, staring at an empty red and green box. "WHO STOLE MY FIVE GOLDEN RINGS BETTER OWN UP!!"
--On The Sixth Day of Christmas, My True Love Gave To Me--
"Six geese a laying FIVE GOLDEN RINGS! Four calling birds, three French hens, two turtledoves, and a partridge in a pear tree."
Sasuke was running to the market with six geese in his hands, the geese dropping eggs all over the place. "Stop laying eggs!!"
--On The Seventh Day of Christmas, My True Love Gave To Me--
"Seven swans a swimming, six geese a laying FIVE GOLDEN RINGS! Four calling birds, three French hens, two turtledoves, and a partridge in a pear tree."
Sasuke stared at his pool. He sighed, walking into his house and came out holding a broom. "GET OUT OF MY POOL!!" He swung the broom, shooing all the swans out of his pool.
--On The Eighth Day of Christmas, My True Love Gave To Me--
"Eight maids a milking, seven swans a swimming, six geese a laying FIVE GOLDEN RINGS! Four calling birds, three French hens, two turtle doves, and a partridge in a pear tree."
"NO! GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!" Sasuke pointed at the door, forcing the eight maids and their cows to leave. "Would you like a glass of milk at least?" "I DON'T WANT A GLASS OF FREAKING MILK!! JUST GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!!"
--On The Ninth Day of Christmas, My True Love Gave To Me--
"Nine ladies dancing, eight maids a milking, seven swans a swimming, six geese a laying FIVE GOLDEN RINGS! Four calling birds, three French hens, two turtle doves, and a partridge in a pear tree."
"Don't you dare touch my stereo! GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!!" One of the ladies went up to him and seductively asked him. "Would you like a lap dance?" Sasuke's face turned as red as a tomato and he blew up in fury. "GET OUT OF MY HOUSE NOWWWWWWW!!"
--On The Tenth Day of Christmas, My True Love Gave To Me--
"Ten lords a leaping, nine ladies dancing, eight maids a milking, seven swans a swimming, six geese a laying FIVE GOLDEN RINGS! Four calling birds, three French hens, two turtle doves, and a partridge in a pear tree."
"WOULD YOU STOP LEAPING AROUND MY HOUSE ALREADY AND GO HOME!? NO! DON'T GIVE ME ANY SHIT ABOUT BEING LEAPING LORDS! GO HOME!!" Sasuke glared at the leaping lords, forcing them home.
--On The Eleventh Day Of Christmas, My True Love Gave To Me--
"Eleven pipers piping, ten lords a leaping, nine ladies dancing, eight maids a milking, seven swans a swimming, six geese a laying FIVE GOLDEN RINGS! Four calling birds, three French hens, two turtle doves, and a partridge in a pear tree."
"You all suck! And you call yourself pipers! You know what? Go get some pipe lessons and come back later!" The pipers persisted. Sasuke snapped. "GO GET SOME PIPE LESSONS OR I'LL PERSONALLY GO OUT THERE AND BURN ALL YOUR PIPES WITH THE KATON: GOUKAKYUU NO JUTSU!!" (Great Fireball Technique)
--On The Twelfth Day of Christmas, My True Love Gave To Me--
"Twelve drummers drumming, eleven pipers piping, ten lords a leaping, nine ladies dancing, eight maids a milking, seven swans a swimming, six geese a laying FIVE GOLDEN RINGS! Four calling birds, three French hens, two turtle doves, and a partridge in a pear tree."
Sasuke sent the twelve drummers home, sobbing and crying because he had broken everyone of their drummers with a well aimed kunai. "HA! THAT'LL TEACH YOU TO MESS AROUND WITH UCHIHA SASUKE!!" He got hit by a drumstick.
--Christmas Day--
Sasuke walked down to his normal meeting place with Naruto and Sakura. "Kurisumasu omedetou Sakura-chan, Sasuke-teme!" Sakura smiled and said, "Kurisumasu omedetou to you too Naruto." Sasuke gave a little half smile. "Same here."
They stood there for a few moments in awkward silence until Sasuke sighed. "Oh this is ridiculous!" He muttered, pulling out two gifts, one wrapped in orange wrapping paper and the other in pink. "Here!" He thrust the orange package into Naruto's hands and the pink into Sakura's. Naruto opened his gift like a dog on a juicy piece of meat.
"A 24 pack of ramen! Gee thanks Sasuke dattebayo!"
Sakura opened hers slowly; inner Sakura was having a field day. Shannarou! Sasuke-kun has finally noticed us!! Yes!!
"Did you make this Sasuke-kun? Wow… it must have taken a lot of work!" Sakura admired the wood carved swan. Sasuke unconsciously blushed.
Naruto chuckled. "Sasuke-teme likes Sakura-chan!" Sasuke got flustered.
"WHAT KIND OF CRAP ARE YOU SPEWING SO EARLY IN THE MORNING!?"
"You're getting flustered! Oh this is great!"
"I am NOT getting flustered!!"
"Then why are you blushing so?"
"Sh-Shut up!"
"You're both so funny!"
Sakura was laughing at both of them. "Oh this is even funnier than my presents to Sasuke-kun!" Sasuke turned towards Sakura. "What presents?" He demanded. Sakura started to sweat. Sasuke walked over to her, grabbed her arm and started dragging her away.
"I'm sorry Sasuke-kun and- is that the Uchiha house!?" He stopped dragging her and placed her on her feet. "Sakura. Answer my question truthfully. Did you send me all those presents?" She nodded quickly. He gave an aggravated sigh. "Have I ever told you how annoying you are?"
She dropped her head. "I'm sorry Sasuke-kun. I-I'll leave now. My mom wants me to get home." She turned to leave when Sasuke stopped her. "I like annoying people."
Sakura didn't go home for a long time.