Fandom: Axis Powers Hetalia
Pairing: main – platonic/friendship Romerica/Romano x America/Lovino x Alfred; mentions of others
Warnings: Swearing, idiocy, tales of Romerica friendship, might be slightly OOC (but I tried to play it as IC as possible ;D)
Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia nor the characters, they belong to Himaruya Hidekaz-sensei. Taylor Swift belongs to herself x3.
A/N: Dedicated to Van. Happy birthday, honey~ :3. You're so old now :p! I hope you'll have great birthday and that you'll do fine on your exam. I love you so much!
Everyone has that one annoying friend, that just can't seem to shut the fuck up. Ever. He talks and talks and talks, and you don't even know what is it that he's blabbering about all this time, because you probably stopped listening to him ten minutes after his speech has started. His mouth doesn't even take a break when he's eating – which happens a lot – which results in weird food splattered across your face, like lettuce or even small pieces of meat.
His talking isn't the worst thing that could happen to you, however, because you can always block the sound of his voice. It's certainly awful when your annoying friend hates your other friend. When I say hate I obviously mean the 'I-am-going-to-kill-you-with-this-huge-rock' kind of hate. It actually did fucking happen. I was hanging out with Ivan, when that annoying, loud bastard appeared from frigging nowhere with this enormous rock in his hands, that absolutely no normal human being should be able to hold, yelled at Ivan for, apparently, 'stealing and trying to rape me' before he actually threw the gigantic rock at him, which also resulted in me being in range of the attack. Fret not, vodka bastard took out his pipe, yes, fucking pipe, from also fucking nowhere and fucking broke the rock in two. I get the feeling that I've witnessed something amazing and scary at the same time.
Having a possessive, jealous, loud and annoying friend still isn't the worst thing that could happen to you. Only when you add 'obsession' to it, does it become really unnerving and infuriating.
In my case, he unfortunately did have an obsession. An unhealthy one, where he's practically worshipping that one person, at that.
Alfred F. Jones and I are childhood friends, much to my demise. Our mothers are co-workers and great friends, which of course could only end up with them introducing us to each other. I've known Alfred and his younger, much cuter and much calmer and so much sweeter, brother Matthew since I was four years old. That annoying loudmouth was only three, just like Feli, and Mattie was two. The moment when my mother took me by one hand and Feli by the other and stood before the Jones household, was the moment when I was cursed for my life. Because five minutes later I've met Alfred, who's been following me ever since, wholeheartedly believing that I actually give a damn about McDonalds or American football. I don't.
We attended the same elementary school, but when to different junior highs. I remember that three weeks before his graduation, he was still trying to make me transfer to his chosen school, because mine was, supposedly, too far away from a good junk food restaurant. I smacked him.
I made a great friend in junior high, who I was also crushing on. He was frigging annoying, sure, but I already had experience in dealing with the likes of him. He was one year older and believed that he was 'the king of awesome'. His name was Gilbert. Now that I think about, he wasn't the greatest person to be crushing on, but I was fucking dumb when I was 13. He was, still is, annoying, but I like him. He was fun to hang out with. We'd often do a lot of weird pranks together . It was fun.
Until Alfred found out.
That day I was simply enjoying doing my math homework. I remember that it was easy, that's why I was enjoying it, because usually math and I go together like fire and water, or maybe even ice. I was just sitting there and writing, when Alfred suddenly burst through my doors. Crying.
"Is it true?! IS IT TRUE YOU'RE GOING TO ELOPE WITH SOME IDIOT?!" yes, a twelve year old hamburger bastard asked me, a thirteen year old, if I was going to elope with Gilbert, fourteen at the time. I don't even want to fucking know how he got that idea. I just don't. It took me five hours to explain to him that we and Gilbert aren't even dating. And no, I wasn't blushing during that time, no. No, just shut up. Alfred didn't believe me either, and said that I absolutely have to break up with albino bastard. We seriously weren't dating, but explaining to that little idiot that it was a fucking crush would be too embarrassing and tiresome, so I left it at that. The next day he showed up at my school and challenged Gilbert for a duel for the rights to hang out with me.
And that's when two idiots clashed and the first hate was born. Now that I think about it, Alfred hates or at least dislikes most of my friends, no matter when I've made them. That's why it's so hard to hang out with him. I can go out with others in a group, but with hamburger bastard it's usually only the two of us, or eventually Kiku. Which seriously isn't good either, because then my fucking boyfriend keeps whining, which is annoying as hell.
My crush for Gilbert disappeared with time, but we stayed close friends who insult each other a lot, but still know what things not to say. Even Alfred agreed – grudgingly – to let the two of us hang out sometimes, as long as I'll still find time for him. Al is a childish idiot, but you really can't hate him… unless you're Gilbert or Ivan or Natalya, vodka bastard's younger sister that Marcello is crushing on. She's two years older than him and carries around knives and says that she'll marry Ivan for sure, but Marcello still adores her, saying that she's very pure and innocent. I guess you have to be a Vargas taking after our father to have a logic like that. Thank God I take after mom.
When I was sixteen and Al fifteen, he suddenly came over to my house at two thirty a.m., looking absolutely miserable. But do you think I gave a damn? No. It was two-fucking-thirty in the morning, Wednesday, with school starting before eight. And he dared to come for advice at such an ungodly hour. I might have forgiven him IF we hadn't seen each other six hours before, AND if he didn't come in from the window. It nearly gave me a damned heart attack, dammit!
"Penguin! Penguin, wake up!" he said, shaking me awake. Everything around us was dark, and waking up to a tall figure shaking me awake in the middle of the night really wasn't good for my heart. I would have screamed if his hand didn't cover my lips. That, of course, only made me panic more. Of course it did, it was fucking 2:30 and someone was in your room, you would have panicked too! Then that stupid hamburger bastard turned on the bedside lamp, with one of his fingers' touching his lips, clearly motioning for me to stay silent. I beat the crap out of him.
"What the fuck are you doing here, you fucking bastard?!" he looked at me with that frigging blush, acting like a schoolgirl with a crush. "What the hell is wrong with you?" he bit his lip and came closer, sitting on my bed and leaning to my ear.
"I think I might be sick" he whispered, looking at me with scared eyes. He looked like such a child.
"And why do you think that you're, um, sick, bastard?" I asked, looking him up and down. He looked as healthy as ever, with the exception of huge blush sprawled across his face. But his forehead wasn't hot, so it couldn't have been a cold or a flu.
"You see… lately when I'm around this one person my heart hurts a whole lot and sometimes it speeds up so much, that it could match a racing car, and my face gets all hot and my hands get sweaty and I don't know how to communicate with that person, and I get really angry when he's talking with other guys and girls, and I want to be with him a lot, but I have no idea how to tell him that I want to be with him, so I end up making fun of him and he probably hates me, even though he doesn't show it because he's too composed to show it, and it makes me sad and- and I think it's an illness. Do you think I'll be able to cure it, penguin?!" I never wanted to explain to anyone that they were in love, especially not to someone dumb, because it would be too tiresome and kind of awkward. I thought that Alfred, as a healthy fifteen year old boy with proper education and a youthful mother would know what these syndromes meant. At that moment I've realized that I was wrong.
"Are you fucking serious, idiot? You do realize that it's love, right?" okay, so maybe I wasn't the most delicate about it. So what.
"Wh- lo- haha, Lovino! You're so funny! There's no way that it could be l-love, I mean, come on, the other's party a guy, like, you know, no boobs and a birdie down there, you know, a guy and, and we're friends and, hah, come on, you can't be serious!" denial. He's in a fucking denial that he's gay or at least bisexual. Well damn, I thought, night is definitely not the time to be thinking about annoying things like these.
"Yeah, sure, what-the-fuck-ever, bastard. Kiku's as straight as a rainbow anyway, I'm sure he'll understand. Now get the hell lost or-"
"Wha- Kiku?! Who is talking about Kiku?! I-I never said anything about Kiku! You're so silly, Lovino!" he laughed, very unnaturally might I add, and pretended to be dumb.
"Get the fuck out, I want to sleep" he ended up sleeping over.
And that's how Alfred went through his first love, which soon ended in heartbreak. Kiku wasn't dumb, so he noticed hamburger bastard's feelings right away. I wasn't dumb either, so I noticed Kiku's feelings for my annoying cousin with cat fetish as well. Alfred was, is, and always will be dumb, so he didn't notice anything. Four months later, when he finally realized that he's seriously in love with Kiku, he decided to confess. Unfortunately for him, Heracles confessed faster. American bastard's heart was broken into little pieces.
And who did he come for comfort to?
Of fucking course.
He kept weeping in my room, saying that everything is unfair and that love sucks, swearing that he'll never, ever fall in love again. Of course he wanted me to promise together with him to never fall in love. I said no, because it was fucking dumb, and Emma was too sweet to give up for a shitty reason like that. I've always known that Belgian girl liked Lars, the guy from Netherlands, but it didn't mean I couldn't be in love with her, even though it was one sided. She was kind, funny and a tad crazy, but absolutely beautiful, both on the outside and in the inside. I could related to Alfred's heartbreak, but, unlike him, I could be damn strong when I wanted to be.
His pledge to never love again wasn't kept. Right now he has someone that he's in love with, he even said so himself, but he won't tell me who is it. And I have absolutely no idea who the hell it might me.
I turned twenty four months ago, he's nineteen and the both of us are just how we begun. Friends, one annoying and one being annoyed.
But recently, to him being irritating as fuck, the final ingredient was added. He became a fan, an obsessive fan. And he thinks it's okay to keep telling me everything about the singer he's currently spazzing about.
"She's so perfect, penguin. She's so much fun and her music is so amazing and you should totally go see her concert with me. You would love her! She's like my personal hero, you know"
"Fascinating"
"She looks great in the photos, you know. Her blonde hair frame her beautiful face so prettily and her skin is so pale and flawless-"
"Great"
"-and yes, she's great! Her new album is coming out soon and I've already ordered three copies, you know, to support her and-" these sort of conversations really happen more often than they should. He'd randomly call me in the middle of the night, just to tell me how amazing Taylor Swift – because she's the one that he's obsessing over – is. Before his obsession, I didn't really know any of her songs. I don't mind her, really. Her songs aren't my favorites and they never will be, but she's a good singer and people enjoy her music. I think that's the most important thing. The one that pisses me off is Alfred and his unhealthy obsession. His room is covered with Swift's posters and photos. Matthew told me that her songs are played 24/7 in Jones household, and neither he nor his dad can do anything, because both Al and their mom is obsessed with the country singer. Poor Mr. Jones and Mattie.
"Hey, Lovino" I turn to look at Alfred, whose head is resting on my shoulder.
"What?" he looks up at me and grins. It's a matter of seconds before he says something overly stupid, I'm sure of it.
"I'm glad, ya know" I raise my eyebrow. He's always been the type that doesn't make a lot of sense. It's very troublesome.
"About what?"
"That you're my friend, obviously! I'm happy I have you. Let's always be friends, 'kay?" he laughs and hugs me, his head still on my shoulder.
"You're such an idiot" I say, not blushing at all.
Alfred F. Jones and I are friends. He's a weird guy, that talks a lot and isn't very considerate. He isn't the smartest person out there. Rather, he's quite a dumb person that happens to be good at sports and math. He quarrels with a lot of my friends, especially Gilbert, Ivan and Arthur, and makes fun of Natalya, who detests him for insulting vodka bastard. He's obnoxious and his laughter is the most irritating thing in the whole world. His obsession with Taylor Swift is only adding up to his stupid personality. He's a fucking weirdo. But strangely, I don't mind at all. If he weren't one of these things, he wouldn't be my best friend that I know. I hope he never changes, and that he never finds out that I think like that. Because fuck, would that suck.
"I hope we'll always be friends too, idiot" I whisper quietly and pat his head. He smiles in his sleep and just for a minute, I smile a little too.
INFORMATION
Why Taylor Swift – My dearest honey has an obsession with her lately ^^". Personally, she isn't my favorite singer, but I don't mind her at all. I like some of her songs as well. At first it was supposed to be Britney Spears, but my friend only likes her old songs, so yep ;D.
'Penguin' – Alfred's nickname for Lovino; Vani's headcanon. I don't understand either ._."
The boy Al is in love with – I'll leave it up to your imagination :3
The boy Lovi is dating – This thing also shall be left upon your imagination~
Marcello Vargas – Seborga
Seborga x Belarus – I just had to put in in here. I'm sorry, but I had to. I don't care it doesn't exist or that it's weird, it's cute. It's frigging cute. I'm going to write stories for them. Because damn, they're cute ;A;
A/N: I'm so sorry that it failed so much orz. It was supposed to be better. It really was. But that's all I could do ;A; . I'm so sorry. I hope it wasn't so bad… OTL
And fail title is fail. I mean, it refers to Taylor Swift's song; "Forever and Always", but the fic is nothing like the song. Oh well.
To anyone that knows who I am… um… I'm so sorry, guys. For not having updated BG last week and for not answering your messages. I had three contests that I seriously had to focus on. I probably failed two of them OTL. Buut, I passed from one, yay. Ahem. So yes. I'm sorry. I'm going to write a chapter for it and I'll publish it… tomorrow or on Sunday, I think. I SWEAR! And also, I'm sick OTL. The light hurts. But yeah.
Okay, sorry that you had to read the pointless things. Thank you very much for reading this one shot :3. … if anyone reads it, that is… AHEM. Please, take care :3.
P.S.
It's been so many fics now, and I'm still so damn awkward ;A;