In Another Life (AU)

by MarvelDarling

Tom Hiddleston and his wife Courtney live a seemingly normal life in New Jersey. Comfortable, peaceful, maybe even a bit cushy. But something, some little thing, is awry. And he can't quite put his finger on it...until its too late.

In Another Life

Tom Hiddleston walked through the front door of his Newark, New Jersey home just has he had every night for the last seven years. He commuted to New York City nearly every day; trains, mostly. On a rare occasion he'd take his jet black Audi RS5, but only if he was running late or had to come home early. Their home was luxurious to say the least, just like his choice in vehicle. Tom was a prominent New York City based divorce attorney, and his wife, Courtney, a private banker for many of New York's elite. They quite often serviced the same clientele, though for much different reasons. However, here, in New Jersey, they were simply Mom and Dad to a precocious (and recently quite troublesome) six year old, Gracie.

"You're home early," Tom stated in his posh sounding British accent as he walked into the kitchen to find Courtney loading the dishwasher. "I thought you were going to be late tonight."

"I was," Courtney said with a sigh, "and then I got a call from the school." She shut the door of the appliance and fired it up before her dark eyes landed on her quite dapper, strapping husband before her.

"Again?" Tom asked with a heavy sigh himself. "Why don't they ever call me?"

"You were in court. It's fine."

He sighed again and took a seat on a stool at the island in the kitchen. "What happened this time? More fights?"

Courtney shook her head as she dried her hands on a dishtowel. "No," she stated. "She apparently decided to go into the library and throw…shelves of books onto the floor and then nestled herself in the center of them."

Tom scowled and shook his head. "That doesn't sound like Gracie."

"She insists they flew."

Tom tried not to laugh, but his attempt was in vain. "Excuse me?" he chuckled. "She said what?"

"She told the principal and me and the librarian that the books simply…flew from the shelves and landed around her in neatly organized piles," Courtney explained with a sigh. She watched as her husband burst into laughter, nearly collapsing from his stool. "This isn't funny, Thomas. She's getting worse."

"Come on! I think there's worse things she could do than stack books neatly around her."

"I'm not talking about the books. I'm talking about the lying."

"She's six! She's imaginative" Tom exclaimed. "She's not hurting anyone, Court. It's not like she's doing anything illegal. She's a child."

"And what if she does? What if we don't get a handle on this and it gets worse?"

"And what? She turns into some criminal mastermind?" Tom asked with a chuckle. "I think you're taking this a bit too seriously, love."

"And I think you're being too cavalier!" Courtney exclaimed. "But…you're the fun dad and I'm the mean mom. Sometimes I forget." She finished her sentence and turned back to the sink and the items that needed to be hand washed.

Tom sighed and sat silently for a moment. This was how their lives had been as of late. Six months of constantly arguing, barely even being friends. He longed for the days where they glowed at the mere sight of one another, or the mention of their counterparts name. His law school days of sneaking off to her shabby Brooklyn apartment for a quickie in between classes would've been even better. He missed how they were when they lived in the city. He missed how in love they were. Now when he looked into the dark, chocolate colored eyes, the eyes he once got lost in, he could barely convince himself she even liked him.

"Hey," he said softly, getting up off the stool and joining her at the sink. He wrapped his long arms, in their high end dress shirt, around her petite waist. "I'll go talk to her, okay?" he bargained, dipping his head to brush his lips against her cheekbone. "I promise."

Courtney just gulped down an emotional lump in her throat and nodded. "Okay."

Tom sighed, still not releasing his arms from around her. His scruffy chin nuzzled against the side of her head. "What's going on with us?" he whispered. "All we do is argue anymore. I don't like it."

Courtney finally turned to face him. Her dark eyes welling with tears brought on by the same concern. "We're just stressed out," she responded softly, reaching up to adjust the black and blue striped tie around his neck. "Work, Gracie…it's a lot. Add unsuccessfully trying to have another baby and…that will cause anyone to break."

"Don't," Tom said, shaking his head. "Don't worry yourself with that, darling. It'll happen when it's supposed to happen. My concern right now is us."

"I feel like a failure," Courtney said, blinking her eyes as she looked away and tried to hide the tears. "The one thing a woman is supposed to be able to do…"

"Don't you dare put that kind of pressure on yourself," Tom scolded, taking her chin and directing her eyes back to his. "I know we both want another baby, but honestly, if it's just me and my girls for the rest of my life…then I'm okay with that too. We'll just get a dog so I'm not outnumbered." Courtney chuckled which caused Tom to grin brightly. "There she is. There's my girl." He kissed her, soft, but lovingly. "I'm going to go talk to our little magician upstairs and then, Mrs. Hiddleston, it is you and me and the new season of House of Cards. Got it?"

Courtney laughed. "I have work I should do."

"Not tonight. Tonight, you are mine."

"You think so?"

"I command it."

"Command?" Courtney grinned. She then shrugged. "That could be fun."

"God I love the way you think," Tom grinned before kissing her once more. "Be right back." He quickly turned and bounded to the stairs across the room.

Courtney's smile disappeared just as quickly as he had. She grabbed the phone from the counter by the sink and quickly dialed. "Dad. It's me. I think we have a problem."

Tom got upstairs and found Gracie's door pushed shut, a Frozen poster greeting him instead of his blue eyed six year old. He knocked and pushed the door open to find Gracie on the floor, surrounded by dolls. "Is your door supposed to be shut, Princess?" he asked softly, lowering his 6'2" frame onto the floor beside her. They had a rule. The door was only to be shut when she was sleeping. Gracie rarely broke house rules.

The little girl, who was clearly a perfect hybrid of her mother and father shook her head. "You and mommy were being loud," she said softly.

"I'm sorry," Tom apologized, reaching out and brushing one of her raven curls from her porcelain face. "Does it upset you when mummy and daddy fight?" The little beauty nodded. "How come?"

"Cuz Connor at school said that his daddy left because his mommy yelled at him a lot." Her r's sounded more like w's and it always caused him to melt. He was without a doubt wrapped around this little girl's fingers.

"You think daddy's going to leave?" Tom asked. Gracie just nodded again. "Oh, Princess," he cooed, picking up the little girl and setting her into his lap. She instantly nuzzled her face into his chest, all the while stroking the hair of the Little Mermaid doll in her hands. He kissed the side of her head. "Daddy's not going anywhere, darling. I promise."

"What about Mommy?"

"No. No, darling, your mummy's not going anywhere either. We both love you very much. We'd never leave you."

"And you love Mommy?"

"I do."

"And she loves you?"

Tom gulped. "She does. Sometimes…grown ups just aren't very good at showing it. Sometimes they get angry about things they shouldn't and…even if daddy's not mad at mummy, sometimes he's not very nice to her."

"Sometimes she's not very nice to you."

"Yes. It works for her too."

"I know what you should do!" Gracie exclaimed, looking up into her dad's eyes.

"Oh yeah?" Tom asked with a laugh. "What's that?"

"Get her flowers!"

He chuckled. "Flowers? Do you think that will help?"

Gracie nodded. "And a crown!"

"A crown?" Tom laughed. "Why a crown, my darling?"

"Because you said every girl is a princess and mommy is a girl so she's a princess so she needs a crown," Gracie explained.

"That…is a very valid argument for a six year old," Tom laughed. "You are far too smart for your own good." He kissed her forehead as she smiled. "Okay so flowers…and a crown…anything else?"

"Lots of hugs and kisses."

"Lots of hugs and kisses? I think I can manage all of that," Tom stated.

"And then Mommy will be happy."

Tom smiled sweetly. "I think she will be." He paused and took a breath. "Do you know what would make daddy very happy?"

"A crown?"

"Not a crown," Tom laughed. "Can you tell daddy what happened at school today?" Gracie shook her head. "No? Why not?"

"Because you won't believe me."

"Why wouldn't I believe you?"

"Because no one does."

Tom sighed heavily. "Well…why don't you try? Maybe daddy will believe you."

Gracie sighed. "The books just came to me, Daddy. I thought about it and they did."

"They just came over to you without you picking them up?" Tom asked. Gracie nodded. "Did they stack themselves too?" She nodded once more and he licked his lips. She was six. He had to choose his words carefully. "Gracie, do books have legs?"

"No!" Gracie laughed.

"Do…books have wings?"

"No, Daddy, they're not birds."

"You're right, they are not birds. Or people or animals. And that means they can't move by themselves, darling."

"But they did!"

"Now, Gracie. Books don't just come to little girls. Little girls have to go and get the books and put them in piles. Did you go and get the books and then lie about it to the teachers and mummy?"

"No. No I did not."

"You know what a lie is, right Gracie?"

Gracie nodded. "It's not the truth."

"Right. And you're telling me the truth right now? Because Daddy's feelings will be very hurt if you're telling him a lie."

"I'm not!"

"Grace."

She was little, but she knew when her name went from Gracie to Grace she was in trouble. Tears began flooding her crystal blue eyes. "I'm not lying, Daddy! It's what happened!"

"Okay, okay," Tom said, pulling her head to his chest as he began rocking back and forth. He'd lost all his nerve. Flying books or no, he wasn't about to sit here and make his daughter cry. Not for stupid library books. "Alright, darling. I believe you. It's okay, alright? It's okay." He sighed as the girl grew quiet. "Okay, let's get ready for bed huh? You've got school tomorrow."

"I don't want to go to school."

"Why not? I thought you liked school."

"They're mean to me."

"Who is?"

"The kids. They think I'm weird."

"Weird? Did they say that?" Tom asked. Gracie nodded her head once again, her black curls bouncing. "Well that's not very nice of them, is it?" This time she shook her head. "I'll talk to Mummy, okay? We'll figure something out. In the meantime…you, my little one, need to get in your jammies and brush your teeth. It's almost eight thirty and you know what that means…"

"Bed time," Gracie pouted.

"Oh, don't pout. You're much prettier when you smile," Tom said, tickling at her sides and causing her to burst into giggles. "There we go. Much better. Now. Pajamas!" The little girl looked at him and growled. "Oh don't you growl at me, little monster. Pajamas and teeth and then I'll read you a story…or I could just EAT YOU FOR DINNER!" He snarled, laying her on the floor and pretended to gnaw at her while she kicked and giggled and screamed and shouted. "Let's go you." Tom released Gracie and she climbed to her feet, grabbing the nightgown from her bed. He patted her butt as she headed for the bathroom in her room. "What are we reading tonight, love?"

"Cinderella!"

"Cinderella? Again? Can't we read something else?"

"No, Daddy! Cinderella!"

"Okay. Cinderella it is."

"How'd it go?" Courtney asked, looking up at Tom from over her thick, black rimmed glasses. He'd changed into sweatpants and a Tshirt after putting his girl to bed.

Tom sighed and flopped onto the couch next to his wife, his head landing in her lap. "I got nothing. She told me the same story. And…I honestly think she believes it. She doesn't think she's telling a lie."

"What should we do?"

"Aside from enrolling her in Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters, I have no clue," Tom stated, as Courtney's perfectly manicured fingers began making their way through his auburn curls. "This one's out of my wheelhouse. And I've heard about every lie under the sun."

Courtney sighed. "Well…I guess we just let go. Keep an eye on her."

"She said kids at school are picking on her, calling her names."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Apparently they call her weird."

"You are her father."

"Hey!" Tom scolded, poking his wife in the stomach as she laughed. "Not cool."

"I'm not sorry."

"Brat," Tom frowned. He looked down at his own stomach and began playing with the hem of his shirt. "She said something else a bit worrying…"

"What, baby?"

He gulped. "She asked if I was leaving. Or if you were."

"What?" Courtney asked with a dismissive laugh as Tom sat up and turned to face her. "Why would she ask that?"

"Apparently a boy named Connor at school told her that when his parents fought, his dad left," Tom stated. "And she's heard us…fighting…quite a bit as of late."

"Oh God…"

Tom sighed. "And I'd…be lying…if I said the thought hasn't come into my mind, especially lately."

Courtney's eyes widened. "About leaving?"

"No," Tom said shaking his head. "About you leaving." He gulped and looked up at her, his bright blue eyes brimming with sadness. "You haven't been yourself lately, Court. And every day, it's…another argument, or more tears and…I get more and more afraid that some day…you'll just be gone."

Courtney looked at him intently, her own eyes now clouded and sad. "You think I'm going to leave you."

Tom shook his head and ran his hand over his curls. "I don't know. It's not a completely foreign thought."

Courtney sighed and closed her book, moving from the couch cushion beside him to his lap. "Listen to me," she said, taking his face in her hands. "Not once in the last…ten years…or even in the last six months have I ever once thought of being anywhere but where I am. Not once."

Tom fought a smile. "In my lap?"

"You're such a jerk," Courtney scoffed, pushing at his chest.

"I'm kidding," Tom stated, pressing his forehead into hers. "I know what you meant."

"You believe me, right?" Courtney asked, her hands still holding his cheeks. "You know I would never walk away from you. Not you, not Gracie. We've been through way too much for me to just walk away."

"I know, darling," Tom said, tears welling in his eyes. "I think…I think maybe we need to take a break. Go off for a bit. Get out of the city, away from work. Just go be a family for a bit. Take some time and get ourselves back together, ya know?"

Courtney nodded. "I'd like that."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Me too," Tom smiled. He pulled his forehead away but pressed his lips firmly into hers. Courtney wrapped her arms around his neck and their kiss only deepened; tongues tangling, fingers wrapping around strands of hair.

After a few moments, Courtney pulled back, her index finger brushing along the collar of his shirt. "What do you say…we forget House of Cards for the night…and go attempt this baby making thing again?"

Tom's eyebrows arched. "You don't have to ask me twice. But why go anywhere?"

Courtney giggled as he pushed her back on the sofa, his much taller frame looming over her. "On the couch? What are we? Twenty?"

"Why the hell would I buy a couch I can't have sex with my wife on?" Tom asked with a mischievous grin.

"Gracie," Courtney hissed, as his lips neared hers again.

"We're closer to her upstairs. Just be quiet."

"You be quiet."

"I am not the loud one, Courtney Hiddleston, and you know it."

The next few weeks brought much of the normal: work, school, meetings, running. Gracie hadn't had any more reported incidents at school and her parents seemed to be getting along better. They were at least making an effort and that was enough to make Tom reasonably more happy.

"Tom?" his secretary, Allison asked, poking her head into his office on Tuesday afternoon. "Your wife's on line two."

"Thanks," Tom said, flashing his perfect smile. To say that most of the women in the building had some sort of office fantasy crush on him wouldn't have been much of a stretch. You could've added most of his female clients to that list as well. Maybe it was his looks, maybe it was the accent. Whatever it was, no one was immune to Tom Hiddleston's charm. No one. "Hello darling," he greeted, clicking into the call.

"Hey," Courtney responded. Her tone was less than happy, less than excited. His mind immediately jumped to Gracie.

"What happened now?" he asked with a sigh.

"What? No. Nothing. Um…I need to go out of town for a bit."

"When?" Tom asked. They'd spent the last few days planning a family trip to Disney World. Gracie had no idea, but Tom was just as excited as the little girl would be. Two weeks in Florida, with his girls, away from the impending New Jersey winter. Nothing sounded more perfect.

"Tomorrow."

His blue eyes rolled back into his skull. "You've told them no, right? We leave Sunday."

"Saying no isn't really an option."

His jaw clenched. "Of course it's an option, Courtney. It's your job. This is your family. Just tell them you have plans."

"I can't do that, Tom."

He tried to keep his temper in check, but the thought that she was attempting to back out of the one vacation they'd planned in at least the last five years was wearing on his very last nerve. "No one can go in your place?"

"No," Courtney answered. She sighed. She knew he was mad. She'd known him long enough to be able to sense that through a phone. "Look, Tom, I'm not exactly thrilled about it myself…"

"Guess it's a good fucking thing we didn't tell Gracie…"

"I will make it up to you."

"Don't bother. Make it up to your kid."

"Don't do that to me."

"What? She's having enough problems right now, I really don't think her mother disappearing is a good idea right now."

"I can't do anything about it, Tom!"

"Oh bullshit, Courtney," Tom said, rolling his eyes. "If you wanted to say no, you would. The fact is you don't want to. Because God forbid something comes between you and your precious career."

"And just what is that supposed to mean?" Courtney's temper was now flaring as well, and hers tended to be a shade worse than her husband's.

"You HATE that job. You hate being at the beck and call of those assholes and you know it," Tom stated. "You always have."

"I don't like being at the beck and call of anyone."

"Trust me, I know," Tom stated matter-of-factly.

"What am I supposed to do, Tom? Quit? And then what? Be the stay at home mom and wife of your fucking dreams? Be the little housewife in her apron and pearls and have dinner ready every night when you get home? Press your suits and pack your lunch?"

"Would you stop?" Tom asked. "I'd never ask you to do that and you know it. That's not at all what I'm saying. I'm just saying you could probably find something to do that would make you a lot happier than this is right now. Hell it'd probably make all of us a lot happier."

"Of course. Because MY career is the reason we're not happy. It has nothing to do with you being a workaholic either," Courtney stated. "It's really funny that you're sitting here and rattling all this shit off to me because I could easily turn it all back on you."

"Yeah well, at least my daughter doesn't get the shaft because my job requires it." The exact second he ended his sentence, he regretted it. That was going to be it. That was the nail in the coffin. It was too late to take it back."Court…"

"Excuse me?" Courtney asked with a bit of a scoff. She couldn't believe the nerve of this guy. She was the one who left work when Gracie was in trouble. She took her to all of her doctor's appointments, dentist appointments, anything. And he had the nerve to say… "You've gotta be fucking kidding me right now."

"I didn't mean that," Tom stated, his forehead resting in the palm of his hand as he propped his elbow up on his desk. "I'm sorry. I did not mean that the way it came out."

Courtney just laughed dismissively. "Fuck you, Tom."

"Courtney…"

"I'm done with this. Why don't you take Gracie to Florida yourself? I'll be sure to pick you up a Father of the fucking Year award on my way home."

"Court, please…"

"Have a good day."

And she hung up. The next sound that met his ear was a dial tone. He slammed the receiver back into its holder and pushed the phone hard enough it nearly fell of the back of his desk. Not a good move, Thomas. Not a good move.

When Tom arrived home that night, Courtney's white Mercedes was missing from the garage. He wasn't really surprised. He'd in fact left work a bit early to pick up the biggest bouquet of orchids his arms could carry to try and make amends. It wouldn't work, but it might prevent him from being exiled to the couch that night.

He walked into the house and was immediately greeted by a shout of "Daddy!" as Gracie darted toward him, abandoning her red haired nanny, Jessa.

"Hey Princess!" Tom greeted, setting the flowers on the table in the doorway and taking a knee as his tiny beauty darted toward him. The hug he received from her did a bit to alter his mood. She was strong for a six year old and at that moment it was exactly what he needed. "How was school?"

"Good," Gracie stated. "Where's Mommy?"

"She's still at work," he assumed. "She'll be home soon."

"Are those for her?"

"They are."

"They're pretty."

"I think so," Tom stated with a smile as he stood back up, the girl attached to one of his long legs. "How was she?" he asked Jessa, running his hand over the pint sized girl's raven curls.

"She's fantastic, as always," Jessa smiled. "Do you want me to stay and get something on for dinner?"

Tom pursed his lips and shook his head. "No, we'll be alright. Thank you though."

"No problem. I will see you guys…soon," Jessa said, unaware that the planned trip had fallen through.

"Actually, we've had a change of plans so we'll probably need you Monday."

"That's fine," Jessa stated with a comforting smile as she grabbed her jacket and purse from the post on the wall. "Just let me know."

"I will. Thanks, Jess," Tom smiled as the girl made her way to the door. "Say goodbye, Gracie."

"Bye Jessa!"

"Bye, Gracie."

Tom sighed as the nanny disappeared and he bent down to scoop up his daughter. "What should we have for dinner?"

"Pizza!"

"Pizza? I don't know how Mommy will feel about that," Tom stated, heading into the kitchen.

"We could call and ask her. Maybe she wants pizza too."

"Well, why don't you call her? I'll dial," Tom stated. He set the girl on the counter and picked up the phone, doing exactly as he'd promised. "Here you go."

Gracie took the phone and put it to her ear. "She's not answering."

"Leave her a message."

Gracie took a deep breath as she heard the beep in her ear. "Mommy. It is Gracie. Daddy and I want pizza for dinner. Is that okay? I love you. Bye." She handed her father the phone and he hung up. "When will she call back?"

"I don't know kiddo. We'll wait a bit, alright?"

"Okay. Can we go play outside?"

"It's pretty cold out there, Princess."

"I don't mind."

Tom smiled. "Why don't you let Daddy go get changed and we'll find something to do in here?"

"Okay," Gracie sighed disappointed. "I want to build a snowman."

Tom laughed as he pulled her off the counter. "It's not snowing, baby."

"It will," Gracie insisted as she skipped into the living room and plopped herself on the floor in front of the television.

Tom just stared at her a moment and smiled. She looked so much like her mother. At this second, he barely saw any of himself in the girl. Maybe it was because he was afraid he'd ruined everything.

He was beginning to grow worried now. It was nearly eight o'clock and he hadn't heard a word from Courtney. Not a call, not a text, nothing. He didn't really expect her to talk to him, but the fact that she hadn't returned Gracie's call made him a bit uneasy. There had indeed been pizza for dinner, then some coloring and a bath. Now Gracie sat in the middle of the floor playing with her dolls as Tom paced the living room.

"Mark, hey. It's Tom. Is Courtney still there?"

"No, sir," Mark answered. The man was basically Courtney's counterpart. He was a decent guy. Tom was pretty sure he was waiting for the couple to fall apart so he could swoop in and steal Courtney for himself, but that could've just been paranoia talking. "She didn't come back after lunch. We figured something came up."

Now he was really worried. "I talked to her this morning."

"Yeah, she left basically after she got off the phone with you. She was upset, so we thought she had just maybe taken a longer lunch, but…no one's even heard from her since."

"That's not like her at all."

"That's what we thought," Mark stated. "I'll let you know if I hear anything though. I've left a couple messages but she hasn't gotten back to me."

Tom sighed. At least it wasn't just him. "Yeah. Yeah, me too. Just let me know if you hear from her."

"I will, man."

"Thank you. Have a good weekend."

"You too." Tom hung up and tossed his cell onto the sofa, stretching up to scratch his fingers through his hair. "Shit."

"Daddy!"

"Sorry, Princess."

"Where's Mommy?"

Tom sighed. "I don't know, sweetheart. She's probably on her way home."

"She's always home at bedtime."

"I know. She probably just had to work late," he lied. What the hell was he supposed to say? That he'd been quite mean-spirited and he wouldn't be surprised if she'd run away? But she wouldn't do that. She wouldn't leave Gracie behind. If anything, she would've come home and gotten the girl and then left. Probably to her father's.

Suddenly it hit him that her father may be the one person to know where Courtney was and that wasn't a call he really wanted to make. It wasn't that he didn't like the man; Tom was just fairly certain Phil Clarkson didn't like him. He'd always felt as though the man had some kind of ill feelings toward him, which he found strange because with everyone else, Phil was the nicest guy in the world. He worked for some government agency, Tom had no idea what. Didn't really matter and he certainly hadn't asked any questions. He licked his lips and stared at his phone, still in the middle of the couch. He didn't want to call him. He really didn't, but he felt like he had to.

"Tom?"

"Hey Phil," Tom greeted.

"What's wrong? Is it Gracie?" No one could accuse Phil of not being the most devoted grandfather on the planet. He worshipped Gracie nearly as much as his son-in-law did. Spoiled her rotten. That was a grandfather's job though. He wasn't married. There was no grandmother to speak of. There never really had been as far as Tom knew. Courtney never spoke of her mother and if she did, it was honestly more of in passing than as someone who had ever had a real part of her life. Phil never once mentioned her. It was almost as if the woman didn't exist.

"No, actually. It's Courtney," Tom sighed. "Have you heard from her?"

"No. Why?"

"She's not home…and she's not at work and she's not answering her phone. I can't get a hold of her at all."

Phil sighed. "Did you have another fight?"

Tom rolled his eyes, pressing the palm of his hand into his forehead. Because this was a conversation he wanted to have with a man he was already certain despised his very existence. "I said some really stupid things this morning. We were both upset. She…wouldn't just not come home though. She wouldn't just take off like that."

Phil sighed. "Let me make some calls. I'll get back to you in a bit."

"Alright. Thank you."

"Yeah."

Another dial tone. This one almost less friendly than the one delivered by his wife that morning. Something wasn't right. Something about all of this didn't make any sense. It wasn't like he and Courtney had never argued before. It had become almost second nature recently. They'd both said things they didn't mean, on multiple occasions, but it had never turned into this. She'd never just taken off and he certainly never had. Even if she had decided to go out with friends in the city, she would've let him know. She would've texted, or called, or something. There was no way she would've just disappeared.

Tom took a deep breath and glanced at the clock on the wall. "Hey Princess, you wanna go read a book with Daddy?"

"It's Mommy's turn. We read a book last night. When's Mommy coming home?"

Tom tried to fight the concern that had suddenly overtaken every ounce of his being. "I don't know, sweetheart."

"Is she at work?"

"I don't know."

"We should go find her."

Tom gulped and kneeled down next to his daughter. "Sweetheart, I am sure that Mummy is just fine, alright? She probably just had some meetings or something and forgot to call. I bet she'll be here when you wake up."

"Will she make pancakes?"

Tom chuckled. "I bet she will make pancakes if you ask her nicely."

"I love Mommy's pancakes."

"I know, darling. I do too."

Midnight. It was fucking midnight and nothing. Still no phone call. Still no text. Phil had called him back with no different information than Tom already had. By all appearances, Courtney had essentially vanished. He had a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. Not that she had left him, all of her things were still at the house, but that something was wrong. Really, really wrong. He had been debating calling the police all night, but he knew they wouldn't do anything until she'd been gone twenty four hours. So he had to wait, despite the fact that every second he waited, his fears just grew worse and worse.

He sighed as there was a knock at the front door and rose from the couch. He knew who it was, so the lateness of the guest didn't jar him at all. He opened the front door to find his brother, Don, standing before him.

Don was a beast of a man. Enormous, both in height and muscles. He had long blonde hair, often pulled back in some sort of half ponytail, a scruffy beard on his chin. By the looks of the two, one would've never guessed they were brothers. Hell, if Tom didn't know any better, he'd have thought he was adopted.

Tom didn't really remember his parents. From what he'd been told, they'd both died when he was quite young. He'd always found it odd that he remembered nothing about something that would've been so tragic. But then again, he honestly didn't remember much of his childhood. A few bits and pieces here and there, but those seemed to form more as stories he'd been told, rather than actual memories.

"Hey, Tom," Don greeted, stepping into the entryway. He instantly wrapped his huge arms around his much more slender brother's shoulders. "Anything?"

Tom shook his head. His eyes hurt. He was exhausted, but he couldn't calm himself down enough to sleep. "Nothing," he said. His voice sounded almost robotic, void of all emotion. "I don't…understand. I don't know what's going on."

"Alright, let's…just sit down and discuss things," Don stated, slapping his brother on the back sharply. Tom winced. It was almost as if the brute didn't know his own strength.

The brothers headed to the couch and took a seat on opposite ends. Which was good, considering the width of Don's shoulders basically took the center section as well as his end.

"What happened this morning?"

"I was an ass," Tom stated, elbows on his knees. He shook his head and stared at the floor. "I don't know what I said it…"

"What'd you say?"

Tom rolled his tongue across his teeth. "I basically insinuated that Gracie isn't a priority in her life."

"Tom…"

"I know, I know," Tom sighed. "I didn't mean it. The second it came out of my mouth, I regretted it. The second. She's a fantastic mother. She does everything for that girl. I don't know what I was thinking."

"You weren't."

"That's probably accurate," Tom agreed, placing his head in his hands. "Jesus Christ, what have I done? What if those are the last words I ever say to my wife? How am I supposed to live with that?"

"Stop," Don commanded. "I think you're getting a bit ahead of yourself there."

"Something's really wrong, Donny. I don't know what it is, but… something just doesn't feel right with all of this," Tom said, shaking his head. "I don't know what to do."

"Okay, alright," Don sighed, putting one of his giant hands on his brother's shoulder. "Tomorrow we'll…call the police, we'll do whatever we need to do. She's fine, Tom. I know it. I'm sure there's a perfectly reasonable explanation…"

"Daddy?"

Tom looked to the stairs, his eyes filled with tears. He tried to blink them back as he stared at his daughter in her Despicable Me pajamas. "Darling, what are you doing out of bed?"

"I had a dream."

"What kind of dream, sweetheart?" Tom stated, standing and walking to the stairs. He instantly lifted her into the arms and headed back to the sofa where she cuddled on his lap, her head nestled on his chest.

"It was bad. Somebody bad was here."

"Was where, darling?"

"In the house."

"Aw, Gracie," Tom cooed. "There's no one here but me and you and your uncle Don."

"Where's Mommy? Why isn't she home yet?"

"I don't know, sweetheart. I don't know."

"Is she hurt?"

Tom looked to Don. He had no idea what to say. How could he discourage her line of thought when his was very much the same?

Don sensed the distress on his brother's face. "Gracie, I'm sure your mother is fine. She probably just went to visit friends…or your grandpa or someone else. I'm sure there's nothing to worry about."

Tom wished he could be so certain. He would give anything to have Don's confidence in Courtney's current well being. He gulped. "Come on, Princess. Let's get you back in bed."

"I wanna wait for Mommy."

"No, darling. Your mum would be very upset if she came home and you were up this late. Let's go." Tom rose from the couch once more, Gracie's chin on his shoulder. "Tell Uncle Don goodnight."

"Night Uncle Donny."

"Goodnight, Princess."

Tom carried the girl back into her room and tucked her into bed. More words of assurance, hugs and kisses and he headed back downstairs. No matter what he told her, no matter how many times he said that Courtney would be fine and home in the morning, it felt like the biggest lie he'd ever told.

Her mouth tasted of copper as her eyelids slowly began to flutter open. As she began to regain consciousness, her first instinct was to gather as much information about her surroundings as she possibly could. Her head was spinning and every part of her body she could feel, hurt, but she knew her training and she knew what she needed to do. Panicking wasn't an option.

She was tied to a singular chair in the middle of the room. Her hands tightly bound behind her back, around the chair. Her ankles were tied to the legs, unable to even move. She sighed deeply, her eyes and her mind were her only tools, which was terrible. She was better with her hands.

Cold.

Dark.

No windows. No mirrors. Only walls.

Black paint.

Cement floor.

Single torch near possible exit.

She tried to maneuver through the binds on her hands enough to reach the com on her wrist, but she soon realized it wasn't going to happen. Whomever had done this, whomever had taken her was obviously an expert at knots. Army? Navy? Marine? Hell, maybe he was just a fucked up Boy Scout.

As her mind began coursing with ideas to gain her freedom, a strange crackling began hissing through her chambers. It sounded like static, like an unoccupied radio frequency. Once again her dark eyes flitted about the room. No radio. No television. Not even so much as a solitary speaker. Wherever the sound was coming from, which seemed to be everywhere at this point, she had no idea what it's source was.

She spat the blood from her mouth and listen to it slap onto the concrete before her voice cracked into usage.

"Who are you?"

"Where…is…he…"

Her eyes narrowed and grew darker. So her captor did have a voice. An unrecognizable one, but a voice nonetheless. Despite the fact she had no idea who was speaking, the intent of their words was quite clear. She gulped. She'd been trained to lie. Now it was time to use it.

"I don't know who you're talking about," she insisted as she forced crocodile tears from her chocolate eyes. "Please. Just let me…"

"SILENCE! You're lies don't fool us. We…know…"

"If you know, then you know who I am."

"Yessssss…"

"And you know they'll come for me. An entire team. Not just him."

"They will die…trying…"

She scoffed, blowing a puff of hair at the bangs dragging into her eyes. "I can't decide if your arrogance is endearing or infuriating."

"Quiet, Agent," the voice commanded in a bit of a growl, popping their Ts with a click. "Where…is…he?"

"I'll never tell you. Never."

"Then you…will die…"

"Go ahead. You'll make yourself a whole new batch of enemies you are ill equipped to handle. And he?" She paused as a bit of a chuckle escaped her bloody lips. "He will burn you alive."

No response floated back on the cool air in the room and the crackle had dissipated. Apparently they didn't like her answer. Once again left in total silence, her mind began churning the few clues she had just been given. This wasn't about her. She was a pawn in a game, but it was up to her to make a play. If she could only figure out what.

"We have to tell him. It's our only option."

"Tell him what?" Don asked, immense arms folded across his chest. His eyes watched his brother in the nearby living room talking to the cops. It was ten o'clock the next morning. There hadn't been a word from Courtney in over twenty four hours now. Phil had called in the police and was now standing next to the blonde brute of a man as they now questioned his son-in-law.

Phil just stared at him in response. No words were necessary.

Don chuckled slightly. "You're mad. We can't. You know that," he insisted looking at the man who only came to about his shoulder. Despite their difference in stature, it was quite obvious that Phil was the one in charge of this situation. "Even if we did, he wouldn't believe us."

"We make him believe us."

"Are you hearing yourself?" Don asked. "We can not tell him, sir. We have worked the last…seven years to make sure he does not find out. You know full well what possibly lies ahead if he does."

"And what about my daughter? He could be the only one who knows where to look."

"Tom doesn't know anything…"

"But HE might."

Don sighed and ran his hands over his scruffy face. Phil was his leader, almost a father figure. He was someone he and the rest of the team looked up to, but he wasn't making any sense. The Phil he knew talked in sense of the greater good, of the bigger picture, of the mission at hand. This Phil…this Phil was talking with his heart and when those lines blurred… "Sir, I am not trying to be heartless…"

"So don't be."

"Courtney was well aware of the dangers that lie ahead when she accepted this mission. She knew going into this that someday, somehow, something would happen, that someone would come looking. She wouldn't want us to throw it all away, throw all of HER work away for the miniscule possibility of a retrieval."

Phil's blood was boiling. "And what do you suggest I do instead? Sit idly by and wait to recover my daughter's body?"

"I don't…I don't know. Have you attempted tracking her com?"

"Of course I have. The lab's still working on it."

"Maybe if we sent it to…"

"No," Phil interrupted firmly. "We're not getting them involved."

"Like it or not, they're all technically involved."

"I do not care about technicalities, Don," Phil snapped. "I don't want to bring them into this."

Don sighed. "Then…we wait. Your lab will figure it out."

"What if they don't? What then? Do you want to tell your niece her mother is dead? Do you want to watch your brother slip back into darkness when we tell him the love of his life was murdered? I may not be the biggest fan of the man, but that is not a conversation I want to have," Phil stated. "And what about after? Do we trust him to raise Grace himself? Do we take her away from the only family she's ever known? Leave her with no mother, no father? The end result of any option is the same: he finds out the truth. And personally, I'd rather he hear it from us than allow something to just snap back into place one day. We don't need another incident."

"And what if telling him causes him to slip? What if…the second he knows anything we go right back to square one? What then?"

Phil took a deep breath and puffed out his chest, attempting to look as authoritative as possible. "It's simple. We kill him."

Don's face froze. "That's your plan? To kill my brother? Save your daughter but murder my brother?"

"All things considered…"

"The point of all of this was to save him!"

"And we have. For seven years, we have. We have given him a life he would've never had before. We gave him a family…and love…and…if that isn't enough to keep him sane and on our side, all of this was a waste from the jump. I'm sorry, but it is the only option we have." Phil paused and turned to the brute of a man next to him. Don's face was still carved of stone, a sad yet angry expression stoic and unwavering. He sighed, arms folded across his chest. "You have until tonight to come up with a better resolution. After that, I push forward."

"He won't like it."

"Who?"

"You know who."

"Well last I checked he wasn't in charge of this mission anymore. I am. But if you have a problem, feel free to reach out. I'm sure that'll go over real well."

Don stared after Phil as the much smaller man headed toward the patio door where he could see Jessa and Gracie playing. He had to do something. This couldn't be the only option. There had to be another way.

"I have told you everything I know!" Tom exclaimed, frustrated as he rose from the sofa in the living room. "Repeatedly! There is nothing else! Why aren't you out there looking for my wife instead of harassing me?!"

"Sir, you have a…officers out looking for Ms. Clarkson."

"Hiddleston. Her name is Hiddleston," Tom snarled. He ruffled both of his hands through the curls atop his head as he began to pace. "You think I had something to do with this, don't you?" he asked, his eyes not rising from the floor. "You think I have something to do with her disappearance." The rest of the room remained silent. He looked up, his eyes landing on the mail detective in the armchair behind him. He was tall, dark, a bit brooding. "Don't you?"

"That's not for me to say, sir."

Tom's jaw clenched, his perfect white teeth grinding together. "I had NOTHING to do with this. I love my wife. We may not…always get along, thing's aren't always easy. But I love her…and I just want her home."

"We're doing what we can, sir."

"Well it's not enough!" Tom shouted. "I have a six year old asking every three minutes where her mother is. What am I supposed to tell her? That she just vanished? Am I supposed to reassure her everything is fine? Not sure I could be real convincing at this point."

"Tom, why don't you take a breath," Phil stated behind his son-in-law. "Go get some air. Spend some time with Gracie."

Tom didn't have the strength or even the desire to argue. He simply nodded his head and disappeared into the kitchen.

Phil took a breath and sat down on the sofa the exasperated man had just vacated. "What do we know?"

The girl to his left shook her head, the end of her dark ponytail swishing into her face. "Nothing. The team is looking for any possible angle but right now, everything is a guess."

"And your guess?"

The girl took a breath. "Nothing. Not at the moment."

"Why do I feel like you're not telling me the truth?" Phil asked, crossing one leg over the other.

"Sir, everything is vague at this point. There's no use drudging up things that may not be relevant."

"Everything is relevant." Phil was interrupted by a sharp ringing from inside the pocket of his suit jacket. He reached in the coat as he rose from the couch. "Go for Phil." The color faded from his face, his eyes widening as the voice on the other end of the call spoke. "What? Are you sure?" He paused and sighed. "Then we have bigger issues than we ever imagined."

Tom sat on the patio steps leading out into their enormous backyard. It was cold, but he barely felt it. At this point, the chill felt nice. He propped his elbows on his knees, resting his head in his hands. Nothing made sense. Not one single thing that had happened in the last twenty four hours made a single bit of sense no matter how many times he mulled it all over in his mind. Not Courtney's disappearance, not his brother's or father-in-law's appearance, not the detectives currently sitting in his living room. Something about it all felt off. Very off.

"What's wrong, Daddy?"

Tom inhaled and looked up, his eyes landing on the beautiful little girl standing before him in her pink coat and purple hat and mittens. Every second Courtney was gone, Gracie looked more and more like her mother, a fact that was nearly tearing his heart to tatters. He tried his best to smile comfortingly, but he was certain even the six-year-old could see through it. "Nothing, darling. Daddy is just tired. Very tired."

"Do you need a nap?"

Tom chuckled lightly. "I do."

"Well go take one. Jessa is here. I'll be okay."

Tom pursed his lips, the girl's thoughts eliciting a sweet smile on his scruffy face. "I know you will, my darling. You'll always be okay. Daddy will make sure of it."

Gracie looked down at the purple rubber boots on her feet. The day was hazy and gloomy, the feel of snow floating on the breeze, though not a flake had fallen from the sky. "Mommy's not coming home, is she?"

Tom gulped, tears gathering in his crystal blue eyes. "I don't know, sweetheart. I really don't. She wants to. I know she does."

"Then why doesn't she?" Gracie asked, her own tiny voice cracking with sadness.

Tom quickly swept the pint sized beauty into his arms. He cradled her against his chest, his lips pressed against the side of her head. "She's trying, my love. I know she is. Your mother is fighting every second to come back to you. She's very strong."

"Maybe we should go find her."

"Oh darling. I wish we could. I truly do."

"Your time is up," Phil stated, walking into the kitchen. "What's your plan?"

Don's head slowly began shaking from side to side. "I don't have one."

"Didn't figure you would," Phil stated with a sigh. He took a deep breath. "We may know who is behind Courtney's disappearance, but if we're right…it truly is all about him. I'm sorry."

Don nodded, slowly but surely. "They used her to get to him."

"We think so. They're using Courtney as bait to draw him out."

"And then what?"

"I don't know. Can't draw out a man who doesn't even know who he is."

"So you're going to tell him?"

"I don't really see any other option."

"Thomas, take a seat," Phil stated. As night had fallen on the New Jersey suburb, the first snow of the season had begun to drift from the sky. It had been a chore coaxing Gracie back inside and into her pajamas. She'd always loved the winter. She would've rather played in the snow than the sand any given day. "We need to talk."

Tom groaned as he marched into the living room. "I'm tired of talking. I don't know what's left to say."

"It's our turn to speak," Don stated, his arms wrapped around himself.

Tom looked between the other two men in the room, confused. "You two have been strange today. I didn't realize you were so close."

Don sighed. "There's…a lot of things you don't know."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Tom asked.

Phil took a deep breath. There was no easy way to go about this. It was going to have to be like a bandage: grab hold and yank it off. "There are a lot of things…about this life that you may not know. Things aren't exactly what they seem."

Tom's eyes narrowed. "What do you mean?"

Phil took a breath and sat down next to his son-in-law. "About seven years ago, there was a terrorist strike on New York City."

"What?" Tom asked. "Courtney and I still lived in New York seven years ago. I think I would remember."

"No. Because we've wiped the occurrence from your memory…along with a lot of other information," Phil stated as he began opening folders across the coffee table. "The group that infiltrated wasn't your run of the mill terrorist organization. They were from…another place. Another planet."

"Aliens?" Tom asked with a chuckle. "Aliens tried to take over New York?"

Phil tried to ignore the disbelief that hung on the man's voice and continued with his story. "They were called the Chitauri. They were led into this world through…a portal. An opening between the realms…"

"The realms? Are you…drunk? What is this some kind of joke?" Tom asked rising to his feet.

"Sit down, brother," Don commanded. He placed his strong hands on Tom's narrow shoulders, giving the man no other choice but to obey. "Listen to what Agent Coulson has to say."

"Coulson? Who…what… I don't understand…"

Phil sighed. "My name, my real name, is Agent Phil Coulson. I run an agency called SHIELD. We…investigate dangers to society that no other organization can possibly begin to comprehend. At the time of the attack we were run by a man named Nick Fury. I met you and your brother a few years before that, when you came to this realm."

Tom's head began to wave back and forth, slowly at first, then growing more rapid with each pass. "This is ridiculous."

"Your name is Loki. You come from Asgard and…you led the Chitauri to us. You were…hell bent on taking over this country…this world."

His words echoed in Tom's ears. This was ludicrous. Every word, every syllable made less sense than the one before. "If I'm…Loki…who is…"

"Thor."

"Thor?" Tom asked with a laugh. "As in the Norse god of Thunder Thor? What does that make me? The trickster god?" Both men just stared at him as Tom's eyes wavered back and forth between them. "Come on you guys. You can't possibly expect me to buy this."

"I know how this must sound…" Phil began.

"You have no idea how this sounds!" Tom exclaimed, once again rising to his feet. This time he was allowed off the couch. He began pacing the grey carpeted floor. "You're telling me that my entire life, everything I remember is a lie. You're telling me I'm some sort of…evil…alien monster that caused chaos that I don't even remember happening…"

"If you look at the files…"

"I don't want to look at your stupid fucking files!" Tom screamed. "I want to find my wife! I want my family back and I want all of this bullshit to stop!"

"Loki, please…" Don or Thor or whatever his name was began.

"MY NAME IS NOT LOKI!" Tom roared. "I don't know if you think you're helping or if you're both completely insane, but this…crap is getting us nowhere. Your…alien conspiracy theory isn't going to help us find Courtney. If that is her real name. God knows what theory you two have."

"Her name is Courtney. Courtney Coulson and she is my daughter," Phil stated. "She is in fact, the only living relative I have."

"How is she involved?"

"She is a SHIELD agent. She was appointed to watch over you after we released you back into society," Phil stated, leaning on the back of the couch with a sigh. He thought a moment and chuckled. Tears began to well in the man's eyes thinking back to when his daughter first took on the vengeful god. "She always had a soft spot for you. Even when they were holding you. They kept you quite heavily sedated. No one…knew exactly what else you were capable of…but…she stayed at your side. She read you books even though…you were far from conscious. Brought you things…tried to talk to you…"

"You say they…"

"You killed me," Phil stated, looking up at the man.

"I obviously did a terrible job," Tom stated.

"You thought you did. Everyone thought you did but…I was just a subject of the same experiment they ended up using on you."

"What experiment is that?"

Phil sighed. "They called it Project TAHITI. To…put it in simplest terms, it…is a mind melt. All of the bad memories, all of the pain, is erased and…replaced with things more beautiful. More…soothing. It saved my life, though, not without side effects."

"Why would you save my life if I tried to destroy yours?"

"I asked them to," his brother answered. "After the Battle of New York I took you back to Asgard. You were placed in prison, a life sentence but…things happened and I needed your help. I thought you had died but…even that wasn't true. There is no better liar than you, brother."

"So what happened? How did I end up back here?"

"Another battle. Another war. You gave your life to save mine. In return, I brought you here. In hopes of saving you. For a long time you slept. We weren't sure you would ever wake up and then Courtney…Courtney told us about her father. Told us that…he was indeed alive and there was a possibility that he knew how to bring you back."

"Mind you, it took a bit of convincing," Phil spoke up. "I wasn't exactly excited at the idea of saving the life of my murderer. But your brother here, and…my daughter, made a very moving plea." He took a breath. "I decided to try. To…give you some sort of life you had never had. We erased your…entire memory. Your childhood on Asgard, the Battle, all the things you blamed your upbringing for and replaced them with something more beautiful. A life of…love and compassion. A woman that…absolutely worshipped the ground you walked on. A wedding. A child."

"Is any of it real?"

"What do you mean?"

"My marriage? Gracie?"

"There was no wedding but there is a legally binding document, yes," Phil stated. "We had to create every aspect of the life we implanted in your brain. And Gracie…well…she was sort of an accident. She wasn't in the plan. When Courtney told me she was pregnant, trust me, I was none too thrilled."

Tears began to burn in Tom's eyes. Despite the fact that everything they were telling him was absolutely crazy, it was the only explanation he'd gotten for anything at this point. For Courtney's disappearance, for his inability to remember any aspect of his childhood. It was crazy. But it made far too much sense. "Did she really love me?"

"More than anything, brother. The way Courtney feels about you is…the realest love I have ever seen," Don stated.

"Her initial task was simply to watch over you," Phil explained. "I fought her on it. Quite hard as a matter of fact. But she was persistent and there was really no one else who desired to be pegged with your well being for the rest of their life. You made quite a lot of enemies on your short time on this planet."

"Who took her?"

"We believe it to be a branch of Hydra, a terrorist organization that came to fruition during one of the World Wars. They were first to discover the tesseract back in the forties and attempted to construct weapons to destroy the world as we know it. SHIELD retrieved it and when you came to this world, you used it against us. You turned a number of our own agents and scientists against us. Once we thought we had defeated you, Hydra regained it. They had infiltrated SHIELD long before unbeknownst to all of us. The problem is, it resides in a staff that was once in your possession. They…seem…to be having problems figuring out exactly how to use it...and so they took Courtney…"

"To draw me out. They want me to help them," Tom stated.

"I don't know if they want you to help them or if they simply want to use you. Their motives are unclear, but yes. We believe the kidnapped Courtney to get to you," Phil stated. "I know this is a lot to process…"

"You have no idea," Tom stated exasperatedly.

Phil glanced to Thor and then nodded at the doorway leading into the kitchen. "Why don't we leave you alone with the files? You look them over. See if…it helps any of this make sense and if you have…any questions, we'll be right here."

Tom just nodded as both of the other men exited the room. He felt warm tears rolling down his perfectly chiseled cheekbones. He felt like he was drowning. Drowning in a life full of lies and things he didn't understand. Taking a deep breath, he headed back to the couch. If he could even begin to figure things out, he had to at least try.

He wrapped his arms around himself as he stood outside in the cold, snowy night. He had read all of Phil's files. Over and over. There were notes and pictures and…though he wanted to, he was still having a hard time believing the man. Sure the villain in question bared a striking resemblance to himself but…it couldn't be true. None of this could be true. The god of mischief? From another realm? Born of a frost giant but raised by Odin and Frigga? It was all a story, a legend. He'd read enough in his day to be familiar with Norse mythology. But that's all it was. Mythology. Not fact.

He stepped into the snow, heading for a hanging planter in the nearby gazebo where he hid a pack of cigarettes. He'd stopped smoking long ago, in college, at the request of his beloved. But he always kept a pack hidden for especially stressful times and this definitely qualified.

But as he walked toward the gazebo, he caught a glimmer of light in the playhouse he'd built for Gracie two summers ago. It was more of a tiny house than a play thing, complete with lights and impenetrable to all of the elements. He was quite proud of his handiwork and Gracie loved it.

He stooped down to glance in the window as he strode by. Sitting in the middle of the floor, dolls in hand, was Gracie. But it wasn't Gracie. It was her face, her hair, her form. But her skin… it was blue. He blinked his eyes, trying to bat away what he was sure was simply exhaustion, but no matter how many times he looked away, when he looked back inside, he saw the same thing. A blue little girl, with patterns of raised lines all over her skin. She wasn't even in a coat. Pajamas and her purple boots. His heart began to race as he made his way over to the door.

"Gracie, come out of there," he commanded, opening the door and reaching in.

"Daddy? What's wrong?" the girl asked as if nothing was wrong.

"Get out. Come here."

"Daddy…"

"Grace! Now!" Tom shouted. The little girl listed and came toward him. He took a tight grip on her arm but was instantly called to look toward the door.

"Tom…"

He turned to the patio to see his brother and Phil standing there, now with a woman he only recognized from the file. Natasha. Natasha Romanov or Black Widow. Or something like that.

"Daddy! You're blue too!"

Tom eyes jolted back toward his daughter, landing on his own arm which was now being taken over by the sky hue. The longer her held on, the more of his skin took on the tone. It wasn't a lie. Everything they had said, everything he'd fought so hard to dismiss…it was all true. Tom Hiddleston was their creation. He was Loki, Loki of Asgard.

"This is Loki?" Natasha said dryly, arms folded across her chest, gazing at the man hunched over on the couch, face buried in his hands. "Not as big and bad as I remember."

Tom rubbed his fingers in his eyes. Maybe this was all a dream, a nightmare. Maybe if he rubbed hard enough he'd open his eyes and be standing in line at DisneyWorld with his family. But as he opened his piercing blue eyes and blinked away the random colors and shapes his hands had brought swimming forth, he was in the exact same place he'd been when he shut them. "I don't understand," he said softly.

"Me either," Natasha stated. "What are we doing here? What's the game plan?"

"There is no game plan involving you," Phil sated. "I'm not certain why Thor called you…"

No one knows Hydra better than Natasha and Steve," Thor explained. He glanced around the room. "Where is Steve?"

"Courtney is still a touchy subject," Natasha mumbled her response, hoping it would avoid her enemy's ears.

Tom's brow furrowed. "What are you talking about?"

"Wow. He really doesn't remember anything does he?" Natasha asked with a scoff.

"HE can hear you," Tom snarled. "You can ask HIM."

"You really wanna know?" Natasha asked, a certain air of annoyance to her voice. "You wanna know how Captain America was nailing your wife before you came along? That's why Coulson doesn't like you. He HAD the perfect son-in-law."

"Enough," Phil interrupted as Tom sat in a quiet horror. "This isn't getting us anywhere."

Natasha sighed. "Steve wants to go in. Alone."

"The hell he is," Tom said, rising to his feet. "She's MY wife."

"And you're utterly useless. You don't even remember your name," Natasha reminded. "What're you going to do? Bore 'em to death with your implanted law crap?" She glanced at a silent Thor, his eyes trying to dodge her gaze. She got the same from Phil. "You've gotta be kidding me."

"Nat…" Phil began.

"You wanna bring him out of it? Have you lost your mind!?" Natasha cried. "Fury will never allow it!"

"Yes, well last I checked Fury doesn't run SHIELD because there is no SHIELD," Phil snapped. "This is my mission, MY team."

"And you want to release public enemy number one! Natasha exclaimed.

"He was under outside influence," Thor began.

"He still murdered people. Hundreds of them. And nearly destroyed not one, but two cities," Natasha stated. "And you want to chance unleashing that kind of psychosis on the world again?"

"Someone gave you a second chance," Thor stated, still as calm as ever.

"That WAS his second chance! How many more does he get? How many more people need to die? We should've put him down a long time ago instead of letting you haul his crazy ass back to Asgard!"

"HE IS MY BROTHER!" Thor roared.

"Enough!" Tom shouted. As he sprung to his feet, his arm and hand jetted out. Instantly the television hanging on the wall exploded, shooting out sparks as it crashed to the floor. Everyone stopped and stared, including the man himself. "Oh my God…"

"See? He doesn't even remember anything and he's destroying shit," Natasha stated. "What do you think will happen if you bring the real Loki back?"

"What do you mean 'bring him back'?" Tom asked, shaking his head, his eyes still looking from his hand, to the wall, too the shards of television on the floor. He was in shock. How did…

"They want to probe into your brain again and unlock all the secrets they've been trying to hide for the last seven years," Natasha answered.

"What? Why?" Tom asked. "What will that do?"

"Hydra wants Loki, not Tom," Phil said softly.

"No," Tom said, shaking his head. "No. I'll help you…in whatever way I can, but I don't want to go back to that. I don't want to be that monster. I don't want to be…a murderer…"

"Loki…" Thor began.

"No!" Tom shouted. "I'm not him! That's not who I am! I'm not Loki! My name is Tom and I'm a thirty four year old divorce attorney with…an incredible wife and a precocious six year old…"

"Whom took Jotun form right before your eyes," Phil interrupted. "What are you going to do when you can no longer play off her powers as tricks of a child? The powers she got from YOU. Or when she starts aging slower than everyone around her? Or when she turns blue at school, in front of other children, or teachers?" Tom just stared at his father-in-law blankly. "You can choose to deny who you are. You can choose to walk away right now but you cannot stop Gracie from becoming what she is, what you are."

"You had to know this would happen. There has to be some kind of plan for Gracie," Tom insisted.

"There's no plan because Gracie was never supposed to happen," Phil argued. "Honestly, we were operating day by day with her. Even with you. At some point you'd realize your wife was getting older and you weren't. This couldn't have gone on forever."

"And then what?" Tom asked. "What were you going to do with me then?" Phil, Thor and Natasha all remained silent. "Another wipe. You would've just erased everything."

"Another life. Another agent at your side," Phil sighed.

"And Gracie?" Again silence. It didn't take Tom long to figure it out for himself. "You were going to do the same thing to her. You were going to wipe your own granddaughter's memory!?"

"We had no other options," Phil answered, embarrassed.

"Are you kidding me!?" Tom exclaimed. "What were you thinking in the first place!?" He paused and shook his head. "You should've let them kill me."

"Don't say that," Thor commanded.

Phil slowly began waving his head back and forth, inflating his cheeks with air and exhaling slowly. "He's right. I never should've let Courtney take on this mission. I knew she was already in too deep. I should've stopped her."

"You tried, sir. We all did," Natasha stated. "She wouldn't listen to any of us. Not even Steve." She watched as Tom winced at the name. "Courtney…is very headstrong. Nothing you could've said shy of locking her in a containment cell would've done any good."

Phil gulped and nodded his head. "If you'll excuse me, I need some air," he said softly before marching toward the patio door.

Tom watched him disappear before turning to the Avengers in the room. "Why did she come with me? Courtney? Why did she choose me?"

Natasha heaved a heavy sigh and shrugged. "She loved you? I honestly have no idea. One minute I hear Steve planning a proposal and then the next thing I know she's ended it and become Mrs. Loki. If I could explain it, I would've by now."

Tom shook his head and sat back down. "I was a monster. I don't understand."

"Look, I have no idea. She's had this weird soft spot for you from day one. The second Thor brought you into HQ. He took you to Coulson because he knew we'd never welcome you and we sure as hell wouldn't help you. But Coulson has a softer heart than most and…apparently Court inherited that."

"And Steve?"

"Loki, it doesn't matter…" Thor spoke.

"Tom, please," Tom argued. "They were engaged?"

Natasha shook her head. "No. He never actually proposed. He was…enamored with her. I'd never seen him like that. I imagine it was a lot like how he was with Agent Carter. I'm not sure she ever really felt the same way. Not that she didn't love him, she did just…not like he loved her. It was more her…trying to make Coulson happy. He hated that she joined SHIELD and so I think she was trying to appease him a bit and let's be serious, it's not like Cap is a bad prize."

"So Thor bringing me here basically ruined everything?" Tom said with a chuckle, running his hands over his curls as he paced. "No wonder Phil hates me. She could've been happy, safe and instead…"

"She wouldn't have been happy," Natasha stated. "She would've been settling. There's a difference."

Tom sniffed and shook his head. "I don't know what to do. I mean…I know what I want to do, I know what I need to do but what if…HE doesn't agree? What if he doesn't want to help? What if he doesn't care?"

"You will," Thor insisted. "You're the same person, brother."

"But we're not," Tom stated, shaking his head in defiance. "You don't know how I'll react. How do you know I'll remember any of the last seven years? How do you know I'll be…good? That any of Tom will stay? That I'll still love them?"

"Because you're my brother. I have faith in you," Thor answered.

"I wish I was that confident," Natasha sighed.

"Me too," Tom agreed.

"I know…that you…that Loki is capable of some truly terrible things," Tom began, "but I also know he is capable of great love. You saved my life. You saved Jane's life. Loki did those things, not Tom. And he…he loved our mother with such ferocity that even after I put him in jail, he joined me in battle for her. For me. The way that you love Courtney and Gracie…that isn't new. That IS Loki. If the man standing before me wasn't inside my brother to begin with he wouldn't be standing here now."

Tears clouded Tom's usually glowing eyes. "You really believe that?"

"I do," Thor nodded. "With all of my heart."

As Tom opened his mouth to speak, the brunette he once believed to be a police officer burst through the front door. "Where's Coulson?"

"Right here," Phil answered, emerging from the kitchen. "What's going on, Skye?"

"They've made contact."

She tried to writhe away as a masked man stuck electrodes to her temples but it was to no use.

"I know who you are," she snarled through gritted teeth, " and if I do, you can bet so do they."

The shrouded figured made no attempt at a response, just collected his things and made his exit. The second he did, however, the hiss of static met Courtney's ears once again.

"We'll start easy. What is your name?"

"Shirley fucking Temple," she snapped. The second her sentence finished she felt a bolt of electricity shoot through her body. Her teeth clenched, every muscle in her body contracted as her vision was overcome by blackness. After a few painful moments, it all subsided, leaving the girl gasping for air. "That tickled."

"Where is he?"

"Who?" Another jolt. She exhaled sharply. "You guys really know how to treat a lady. I'm jealous of your wives."

"Tell us where Loki is."

"A Yankees game." Zap. "Buying a yacht." Zap again. "Having a ham and cheese sandwich on Uranus." Another. She was trying to fight the pain coursing through her veins. She wasn't sure how long she could keep this up before her brain turned to soup.

"Stop fighting. You will lose."

"You may as well just kill me because I will never give you anything." The electricity sent into her bones caused a scream to erupt from her lungs. This one packed a mightier punch than the others. They were not playing games. Courtney tried to keep her eyes open but began to feel like she was being pulled under by quick sand, dizzy, disoriented. "He…I…" Even her tongue felt heavy. She could feel herself beginning to drool. She was being pulled into unconsciousness and as she slipped away, she knew her fate would only be worse when she came to.

"The feed is live," Skye stated, clicking away on her laptop as the entire room watched as Courtney was electrocuted again and again. "I think I can get a trace on it but it is going to take some time. They have some pretty advanced blocks going on here, but I'm trying."

"Try harder," Phil commanded, arms folded around himself as he paced the floor of the living room. He couldn't watch his daughter being tortured on the screen in front of him. He looked to Tom who was having an equally hard time, tears glimmering in his eyes, hands tented in front of his mouth as he leaned his elbows against his knees. "She's protecting you. Do you see that? Do you see what she's doing for you?"

"I can't watch this," Tom stated, rising from the couch and turning his back toward the television. "Why are we just sitting here?! Someone do something!"

"We're doing all we can. We don't even know where she is right now," Skye stated as she continued to try to hack into Hydra's system.

Natasha gulped as the video feed went blank. "There were rumors that Hydra had set up base in Russia. We tried to go in but didn't find much of anything."

"Do you think that's where she is?" Tom asked, turning back to the rest of the group scattered around the living room.

"She could be," Natasha stated. "I don't know."

"She's right," Skye stated, sitting up straight from her makeshift desk at the kitchen counter. "She's definitely in Russia. I don't have an exact location."

"We need to get in the air," Phil stated as the room began scrambling. "Get Hunter and Bobbie inside. I want them here with Gracie. Thor, get Jane here. She needs something familiar."

"Wait, what about me?" Tom asked as everyone rushed around him.

"You're coming with us."

"What is he doing here?" May asked as she strode beside Phil on the BUS.

"We need him."

"We don't need him. We can go in on our own," May argued.

"And then what?" Phil asked as they stopped. "They want him, May. And I'll be goddamned if I'm not giving them what they want."

"He doesn't even look like himself. They'll never believe it…"

"We triggered a shape shift when we put in the block, the second it's removed…"

"Wait. You're removing the block? Coulson…"

"I don't want to hear it, May," Phil snapped. "This is the mission. Take it or leave."

May's lips pursed as she shook her head disapprovingly. "What are you going to do once we have her? Just let him roam free."

"Hydra can keep him for all I care. This is about getting my daughter home safe and as close to unharmed as possible," Phil stated. "What happens to Loki is of no concern to me."

"This isn't you, Phil. You're not thinking this through."

"I don't want to hear another word. Get us in the air. Now."

"Where are you going, Daddy?" Gracie asked as Tom sat down on her bed.

"Daddy has to go away for a little bit, Princess," Tom stated. He was struggling to keep his composure. For all he knew this was the last time he would see his little girl and it was ripping his very soul from his body.

"I heard Mommy."

Tom sighed. "I was watching a video, sweetheart. I'm…going to get Mummy now, alright? She'll be home soon."

"Who's watching me?"

"Aunt Jane. She is on her way and…until then…Daddy's friend Bobbie is downstairs, just in case you need anything."

"I wanna go with you," Gracie stated with a pout as she threw her arms around her father's neck. "I wanna help you find Mommy."

Tom couldn't hold back the tears anymore as they slowly began trickling down his unshaven cheek. "Oh sweetheart, I wish you could. But…it's too dangerous, okay? Daddy and Grandpa and Uncle Don need to go take care of this and…then…everything will be fine. I promise you."

"Don't leave, Daddy."

Tom broke down as he felt his daughter heaving into his chest, her tiny frame trembling as she sobbed. "I have to, my darling. I have to make this right."

"When are you coming home?"

He couldn't lie to her. "I don't know. Listen, darling," Tom said, pulling the little girl onto his lap and looking into her glowing eyes. "You need to be brave, okay? I need to you to be the brave, beautiful big girl that you are and stay here and believe that very soon your mummy will be home, everything will be okay. Just…remember that Daddy loves you very much. You are…the most important thing in my life and no matter what happens, you will always be my Princess and I will always love you."

"I love you too, Daddy."

"Sir," Agent Mac's voice came from the door. "We need to leave."

Tom nodded quickly and looked back to Gracie. "Okay. You're going to be a big girl for Daddy right? Big and brave?"

"Yes."

"Alright. Come here." He hugged her tightly and pressed his lips firmly into her forehead. "I love you, Princess."

"I love you, Daddy."

"Alright. Back in bed, darling." Gracie listened and crawled back into her Princess littered covers. "Get to sleep and…when you wake up, Aunt Jane will be here and you will have loads of fun, alright?" Gracie just nodded. He kissed her forehead and got up. "Goodnight, my love."

"Goodnight, Daddy."

Tom walked to the door, pausing to watch his little girl grab hold of a teddy bear and curl up into a ball. He stayed just long enough to create a memory, a photo of the girl in his brain. He had to do this. Not for him, but for the little girl that deserved her mother.

"I'll do it."

The room fell silent and all eyes turned to Tom.

"What are you talking about?" Thor asked, rising to his feet.

"Take out the block. Bring him back. I want to do whatever it takes," Tom stated.

"Brother, listen."

"No, you listen," Tom shouted. "I watched the love of my life get tortured, again and again, for me, BECAUSE of me. I have to do this. For her. For Gracie. Gracie deserves her mother."

"She also deserves her father," Thor stated.

Tom shook his head. "You're not going to change my mind. I'm doing this."

"Good," Phil stated with a sigh. "Fitz, Simmons, get him to the lab."

Tom watched two agents step forward: a curly haired young man and a red headed girl who was more than familiar. "Jessa?"

She smiled and extended her hand. "It's Jemma, actually. Terribly sorry."

Tom laughed. "It's alright. Lead the way."

As the two scientists lead Tom out of the room, he bumped into a muscular man in the door way. If he hadn't already recognized him, the star spangled suit would've given it away. No words were exchanged. Just heated glances from the blonde super soldier and an attempt at a friendly nod from the curly haired lawyer. Tom sighed as he, Fitz and Simmons disappeared around the corner. Just when he thought things couldn't get worse.

He sat as still as could be as the two young scientists hooked him up to a multitude of contraptions.

"This will monitor your heart rate," Jemma explained, clamping a monitor onto his index finger. She paused as she noticed the concern evident on the man's face. "I'm…not going to lie to you. This is going to be quite painful…but if anything goes wrong…"

Tom's head slowly began to wave back and forth. "It doesn't matter. I just watched my wife be electrocuted repeatedly. I think I deserve whatever this does."

Jemma sighed. "You can't blame yourself, Tom."

"You seem to be the only one who thinks so," Tom stated with a chuckle.

"That's because I'm the only other member of this team that witnessed your change," Jemma stated.

"Change? Can you honestly say I've changed? I've been…brainwashed. I had no idea who I was until about two hours ago. You can't really credit that to me having a change of heart," Tom stated. He shook his head solemnly. "What if…this doesn't work? What if…"

"You can't think like that."

"I have to," Tom argued. "But what if it does? What if I turn back into that monster and…" He closed his eyes and tipped his head back to the sky. "I just hope that whatever happens…I can save her."

"You will. We will. We're a team," Jemma said with a reassuring smile. "We need to get started or there won't be enough time."

"I should go," Thor spoke, standing from his chair in the corner.

"No, we need you to stay," Fitz argued. "There's…a possibility…we'll need your help to restrain him."

Tom's jaw clenched. His eyes drifted to the worried expression on his brother's face. "I need you to promise me something…"

"Anything, brother," Thor answered instantly.

"If this…If this goes wrong," Tom began. He gulped before gazing intently into his brother's eyes. "I need you to end it. Whatever it takes. I don't..."

"It won't go wrong…"

"You don't know that," Tom argued with a wave of his head. "And if it does, you need to stop me. For good, Thor. No more of this…attempts to save my soul shit. End it. For good."

"What you're asking…"

"I'm asking you to kill me. I get that," Tom stated. "But if there isn't even…a glimpse of the man I am now when I come to, I really see no other option. And I will not put this world, my wife, my daughter in any more danger." Tom watched as Thor shifted uncomfortably. He knew what he was asking wasn't a normal thing brothers asked of each other. Then again, they weren't exactly normal brothers. "Thor, please. Swear to me."

Thor sighed heavily, his immense shoulders rising then falling. "You have my word, brother. Any means necessary."

"Thank you," Tom stated. He turned to Jemma and Fitz and rubbed his hands together nervously. "Well. No time like the present, I suppose. Shall we?"

Jemma, her eye full of tears, nodded. "Lay back. Let's get started."

The screams rupturing from the man's lungs rang through the quiet halls of the rest of the aircraft. Phil and Steve were sitting stoically as usual, but Natasha was having a harder time listening for some reason. "You should really soundproof the lab if you're going to continue things like this," she said with a bit of an uncomfortable laugh.

"I'm hoping it's the last time we ever have to," Phil stated with a sigh. "He was the last participant in the project. Can't imagine we're going to put him back under."

"Just what exactly are you going to do?" Steve asked. "Let him try to take over the universe again?"

"It won't come to that," Phil insisted.

"You don't know that."

"Well I have to have a bit of faith, don't I?" Phil questioned, rising from his chair.

Steve shook his head. "How could you possibly think this was a good idea?" he asked. "Unleashing the beast? How can this be the only option?"

"Little late to change to course of action now, isn't it?" Phil retorted as another loud, pain filled shout met his ears. "Look, I know how you two feel about all of this…"

"I don't think you do," Steve stated. "You lied to us. You lied to all of us. You said the threat was taken care of."

"It was!" Phil stated. "He was living like a normal human being…"

"But he's not a normal human being!" Steve exclaimed. "He is a terrorist. He practically wiped out entire cities yet we allowed him to be sent back to his home to be punished. Which was our mistake. We never should've let Thor return him to Asgard. But when Thor showed up with him on your doorstep…you should've taken care of him."

"Really? What was I supposed to do?" Phil asked. "You wanna try to kill Thor's brother right in front of his face? Because I sure don't want any part of that."

"You should have contained him."

"I DID!" Phil exclaimed. "Until yesterday, he was contained. He was fine. He…had no idea what was going on. Not even an ounce of evil in his body. He was happy and so was…so was Courtney." He paused as his mind began to roam to his daughter. "Is that what this is about? Him taking Courtney from you?"

Steve closed his eyes and shook his head. "Don't be ridiculous. I'm not that petty. This is about the danger you're about to unleash on the world."

"Look, Steve, I was no more excited about her taking on this mission than you were, believe me. You think I wanted my daughter to shack up with the being that brought on my supposed demise? You think I wanted her to procreate with some Asgardian god? But she made her choice, no matter what either of us had to say. I am sorry that she hurt you…"

"This isn't about that" Steve exclaimed in a rare bout of anger. "It was seven years ago, okay? I've come to terms with her decision."

"Have you? Or is this your attempt to be the hero, save her life and win her back?" Phil asked. "Is that what this is really about to you?"

"No, no," Steve insisted, waving his head back and forth.

"I know none of us understand it, but Courtney chose him. And while I may not agree with her decision, I do respect it," Phil stated. "Do I trust him? Do I believe he's really going to wake up a changed man? No. But she does. And if she has that kind of faith in him than I have to at least try to. For her and my granddaughter." He paused. "And if…it doesn't work and…he's the same…monster he was before…then we'll deal with that then."

"And then you get to explain to your daughter why you had to kill her husband," the silent Natasha finally spoke. "Don't envy that conversation."

"Well let's hope I don't need to have it."

The trio looked up as Fitz burst into the room. "It's done," he stated, breathing heavily.

"And?" Phil asked as both Steve and Natasha rose.

"He's having a hard time dealing with all…the memories…rushing back. He's in a lot of pain…"

"But is he…" Natasha asked.

Fitz, worried and somewhat in disbelief, nodded. "He's Loki. He's back."

"Brother, you need to calm down…" Thor stated, trying to keep his figure as non-combative as possible.

"It's so loud…" the man practically whimpered as tears streamed from his glowing eyes. His complexion had paled considerably. He no longer had the healthy glow, the tan of the man he once was. His well groomed, strawberry blonde curls were gone and in their place, flowing, black as night locks. His once blue eyes were now green and full of pain and tears. He clutched his ringing skull and began rocking back and forth. "God, it's so loud."

"What? What's loud?" Jemma asked.

"Everything!" Loki roared, dropping to his knees in the middle of the room. "It hurts…so much…"

"Just breathe," Jemma stated. "Relax and breathe."

"Why did you do this!?" Loki cried, his eyes shooting up to his brother. "You should have let me die!"

"Don't say that," Thor scolded. "You don't mean that."

Loki struggled for breath as he fell to his backside. He began rocking back and forth. Trying to quiet his mind, trying to gain control. "It doesn't make any sense. None of it makes any sense."

Thor sunk to a knee and placed a strong hand on his brother's shoulder. "You need to rest."

"I don't want to rest! I want you to tell me what's going on!" Loki exclaimed. He wasn't the monster that he had been when he last held this form.

Right now as Thor gazed upon him, he saw the little brother he had loved so dearly. The little brother struggling to understand his existence, desperately wanting to belong. "It's all going to be okay, Loki. It will pass."

"I don't want to do this," Loki said, his hair crashing into his eyes as he shook his head. "I don't want to be this, I want to go back."

Thor suddenly realized at least some of Tom was still present and let out a relieved sigh. "You can't do that. You need to be here. You need to save Courtney, remember?"

Loki, his chest heaving, began to relax. Slowly, his head began to nod. "Yes. Yes I remember…" He looked up as Phil, Fitz, Steve and Natasha reappeared in the doorway. He looked upon their worrisome expressions. "How long until we land?"

"About two hours," Jemma answered. "Let's get you into bed, shall we?"

Loki just nodded as Thor helped him to his feet, his legs weak, knees quaking beneath the weight of his body. He leaned against his behemoth of a brother as he was led out of the lab and into a recovery room.

Phil watched Thor get Loki settled into a bed before turning back to Jemma. "Is he going to be alright?"

Jemma nodded. "Once he makes sense of everything going on in his brain. He's not human. He's…got a lot more memories to make sense of now than any of us will ever have. We just unleashed…thousands of years of history into his brain. That's a lot to comprehend." Her eyes drifted to Steve who looked a lot less concerned than the rest of his companions. "You don't have to enjoy his pain so much, you know."

"I didn't say anything," Steve said, shaking his head with a certain air of defiance.

"You don't have to. It's written all over your face," Jemma stated. "And while…the rest of you may have your doubts, I was lucky enough to know the man he became. And that man is in an…immense amount of pain right now."

"He's still…"

"There's still Tom there. It may not look like it, but…he's still there," Jemma stated.

Phil sighed, relieved. "Good. Very good."

"I can't promise it will stay that way," Jemma stated. "Once…everything quiets down, there's no telling what will happen. We can only hope for the best I suppose."

Steve glanced into the room where Loki and Thor were. Hope? The man was a monster. What hope was there?

"Why does it hurt so much?" Loki asked as he fell to the mattress Thor had just led him to. "Make it stop."

"It will pass, brother," Thor insisted, pulling a chair up next to the bed. "You just have to let it all come back."

"I don't want it to!" Loki argued. He closed his eyes but it didn't help. Now he could see everything that was being released back into his conscious state of mind. All the long ago memories that had once been concealed. It was like a dam had opened, and his past, his life was the water pouring through the floodgates. "What did you do? Why? Why couldn't you just let me rot?"

"Because you would've done the same for me," Thor stated.

"FOR you? You did this TO me! I had no choice in the matter!" He inhaled with a hiss as his brain pounded against his skull.

"I had to do something," Thor said. "I couldn't let you die."

"Why not? I deserved to!" Loki exclaimed. "Or is that what this is? Another form of torture you and you mortal friends decided to inflict upon me? Is this some sort of revenge?" The thoughts running through his brain were beginning to slow, become more clear. He was beginning to be able to place faces. His mother, his father, all the warriors. His Asgardian life was starting to take form in his head alongside with the last few years on Earth. "She's dead."

"Who is?"

"Mother."

Thor nodded solemnly as his eyes fell to the floor. "She is, yes."

"Does Odin know what you did?"

"No," Thor answered. "He has…no idea. Heimdal is the only one who knows anything. He thinks you died that day in battle."

"Oh and I'm sure he's kept your secret from his precious king."

"He has. He swore to."

"You're far too trusting. Always have been," Loki stated.

Thor sighed. "Do you remember where we're going?"

"To get Courtney. You're using me as bait."

"That's not…"

"Oh stop. That's exactly what they're doing and you know it," Loki interrupted. "What happens to me when this is all done?"

"I don't know."

"Great. I'll be put back in some containment cell, chained to the wall," Loki sighed, wincing as he sat up.

"You should lay back down…"

"I'm fine, Thor. Stop overcompensating." He hunched over, his hands pushing the black locks from his eyes. He paused and chuckled, just then realizing that he had returned to his previous form. "I've got to say, I grew quite fond of my MIdgardian form. Seemed to work out well for me."

Thor scoffed. "You don't look that different."

"Right," Loki laughed. "Just like some…genocidal maniac that most of this realm wants dead. No big deal."

"Well you're going to have to prove that's not what you are any longer."

"And how do you propose I do that? Little late to make amends, don't you think?"

"It's never too late. Redemption is always an option."

"Redemption?" Loki said with a scoff as he rose from the bed. "What makes you think I want redemption? I never wanted any of this. I was never given an option. I remember...a battle. I remember…bleeding…a lot of blood, a lot of pain and then I woke up in some house with some strange woman next to me. Though I must say, well done on choosing me a bride. She is…exquisite."

"She wasn't a stranger though."

"She is now," Loki stated. "All the things I thought to be true are in fact not. I don't know anything about her."

"That's not true. Courtney is still the same person."

"But she's not," Loki argued. "She was just an agent tasked with babysitting me for the rest of her life."

Thor shook his head. "No. No she chose to be with you. She chose for you to wake up in that bed beside her."

"I remember…" Loki paused. "I was in some sort of medical ward…"

"That was at SHIELD headquarters. That's where I took you after…after the war ended," Thor stated. "You remember being in the hospital?"

Loki stared out the window. There wasn't much to be seen aside from clouds and the sun. "She read to me. She was reading all the time. She sat there day in and day out and read to me."

Thor cracked a small smile. "She did. She…rarely left your bedside. I didn't…I didn't realize you were…aware…"

"I wasn't, really. I don't…see anything, but…I remember her voice. She has…a beautiful voice." Loki paused and shook his head. "Why? Why would she chose to live like this? Why wouldn't she want a real life of her own?"

"She cares for you. Deeply. She always has," Thor explained. "The second I brought you to Coulson, she…latched on. Begged him to do whatever he could to save you. His first instinct…"

Loki chuckled and looked to the ground. "I'm sure I know what his first instinct was. Same as Captain Righteousness out there." He paused. "They fought. In the room. He was…angry with her. Said she was choosing a monster over him."

"You heard that?"

"I must have. I can hear it now," Loki stated. He suddenly smiled brightly. "She left him for me."

"Try not to gloat," Thor said with a laugh. "It's a bit of a sensitive subject."

"Ha! That's incredible!" Loki exclaimed. "I wish I could see his face. Oh this is good. Slightly unbelievable but good nonetheless."

"Do you remember Gracie?"

Loki's smile now morphed from a triumphant smirk to one glowing with pride. "Of course I do. She's my life. You know, I always wondered where the black hair came from. Makes sense now."

Thor chuckled. "Yeah, we didn't know what to do with that one. We were certain Tom…er…you, would think she wasn't yours."

"Oh she's definitely mine," Loki grinned. "The books. I should've known. It's magic. She's using magic."

"She is," Thor said with a single nod. "Which…is another reason you being…you again may not be a bad thing."

"Why do you say that?"

"Who else is going to explain these things to her? She obviously inherited it from you. You're going to have to teach her, train her. Guide her through…all the changes she's going to go through. You're the only one who understands."

Loki sighed. "No pressure there."

"You're an amazing father."

"Tom's an amazing father. I'm not sure I even know where to begin."

"You'll do just fine," Thor insisted. There was a lull in their conversation. "How are you feeling?"

"Like people were poking around my head with a stick," Loki answered. "Oh wait."

Thor chuckled. "I've been in this realm long enough to understand sarcasm."

Loki sighed and turned back to his brother. "What if…" He paused. "What if she changed her mind? What if I'm no longer what she wants?"

Thor shook his head. "That won't happen. She's always known who you really are. It's never bothered her before, I doubt it will now."

"She might be a bit surprised."

"I'm sure that she will be."

"They have no idea what they're in for."

"Who?"

"Hydra. They messed with the wrong god."

"Steve, I want you on the rear entrance, you and Natasha. Thor, Loki and I will go in through the front," Phil explained as the team sat around a table littered with blueprints of the building where they'd pinned Hydra to be holding Courtney. "We'll go in on the grounds that we're delivering him, try to play it off as an exchange…"

"And if he doesn't cooperate."

"He'll cooperate."

All the eyes around the room rose to the doorway where Loki stood. He was no longer in Tom's high end dress shirt and jeans. The tall, thin man before him now donned black and green, leather and metal, boots and gold armor. "I've got to say, feeling a bit more like myself than I have in oh…seven years or so," he stated with a grin as he strode into the room, Thor directly behind him.

"You seem to have recovered quickly," Phil stated.

Loki shrugged. "I'm a god. Takes more than a little electricity and mind games to hold me down." His eyes met with Steve's, glowing with pure hatred. "What? Didn't expect to see me up and at it so soon?"

Steve rose from his chair. "I don't trust you."

"I don't care," Loki retaliated, his arms folding across his chest. "Your approval means little to nothing to me. Trust that."

"You think if you help us all of your crimes will be erased? You'll suddenly be a hero?" Steve asked.

"I couldn't care less about being a hero," Loki stated. "I'm not doing this for any of you. I'm doing it for her."

Steve scoffed. "Like you care."

"Don't you dare think you can even begin to know how I feel about Courtney," Loki snarled. "She chose me, remember? You mean nothing to her."

"Steve," Natasha scolded, reaching for the man as he reared up.

"She didn't choose you. It was her mission."

"Oh really? Did her mission involve giving me a child?" Loki asked with a smirk. "Was that part of the deal? Believe me when I say she never once accidentally uttered your name in the throes of passion…and I remember those nights well."

"Brother, stop," Thor pleaded.

"She is MY wife," Loki stated, his eyes glaring into the man's a few inches below him. Steve might have him on musculature and stature, but he was by far not afraid of the super soldier. "Remember that. No matter what you do. Whether you go in there and whisk her out of harm's way or not, she's going home with me."

"What makes you think you're going home?"

"What makes you think you can stop me?"

"Alright enough!" Phil exclaimed. "Your little dick measuring contest isn't getting us anywhere." He stopped, noticing a smile pulling up the corners of his son-in-law's lips. "What?"

Loki shook his head. "Nothing."

"I don't think anything that's going on here is a laughing matter," Steve stated.

"I'm not laughing at the situation," Loki insisted.

"Then what?"

"I'm laughing at the fact that any of you think you'll be able to stop them," Loki stated. "You know full well that I'm in control of this mission yet you sit here plotting it out like some sort of chess game. I could go in there alone and take care of this and you all know it."

"You think you can take on Hydra by yourself?" Steve asked with a scoff. "You have no idea what they're capable of."

"And you have no idea what I'm capable of," Loki snapped. "They've harmed someone I love, and believe me when I say that was their greatest mistake. I will paint the halls with their blood. This ends today."

"Well, he's back," Natasha stated with a laugh.

"And better than ever," Loki grinned, issuing the catsuit clad woman a wink. He got a sharp nudge from his brother behind him. "What? I'm married. Not dead."

Phil rolled his eyes. "Can we get back to the mission please?"

"Yes, captain," Loki stated. He then turned to Steve. "Sorry. That's your title, isn't it? Wouldn't want to steal that from you as well."

"Keep laughing," Steve muttered. "We'll see who's laughing when you're ambushed by armed guards."

"Your Midgardian armies don't particularly frighten me."

"They beat you once before, didn't they?"

"Do I look beaten to you?" Loki asked. "Then again, worse comes to worse, I just have Courtney nurse me back to health again. That was quite splendid the last time."

"You know why you're standing her making jokes, the woman you supposedly love could be breathing her last breath," Steve fired. "Maybe you should focus on that instead of trying to get under my skin."

"I don't know. I'm finding this distracting and entertaining…"

"Do we still have the muzzle?" Steve asked, turning back to the rest of the group.

"Go ahead and try to shut me up, I dare you," Loki snarled.

"FOR THE LAST TIME: ENOUGH!" Phil shouted. "For God's sake! Do either of you think any of this is helping anything!? Steve, she chose Loki. Loki, stop gloating like some kind of asshole and act like you want to save her! Jesus Christ, it's like working with a bunch of children around here!"

The room fell silent except for a single chuckle from Natasha. "You sounded a bit like Fury there."

"I'm beginning to understand why he was so annoyed most of the time," Phil sighed. "Now may I continue sans interruptions?"

"Yes, sir," Steve said with a nod, slightly embarrassed by his behavior.

"Loki?" Phil asked. He received a single nod from the Frost Giant. "Good. Now let's go over things again."

She was slipping further and further away with each breath she gasped for. She had been right in assuming her punishment would only worsen the more she evaded their questions. But she wouldn't stop. She would never stop fighting. May had trained her better than that. May and her father, but mostly May. Phil had begged her to stay as far away from SHIELD as possible, to live some sort of normal life, but it was in her blood, most of which was now running down her face or pooling in her mouth. They alternated between the electric shocks and beating her senseless at this point. Her eyes were beginning to swell to the point she could hardly see, just glimpses of light and silhouettes as men came in and out of the room. They had to be coming for her. Someone had to be coming. They just had to.