ENTANGLED BY sterenyk_strey LFWS #1 ROUND 1]
Title: Entangled
Author: sterenyk_strey
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Stargate belongs to Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer Studios Inc., no infringements of any rights is intended.
Spoilers: None
Prompt for the Round: Write a story featuring the team in which ONLY dialogue is used. No scene setters at all. Just pure dialogue. Not even '... Sheppard said' or '... Rodney complained'. All must speak at least once.

ENTANGLED by TO BE REVEALED

"Not. Helping. M-McKay... !"

"I merely thought it pertinent to point out quite how screwed we are. Well, how screwed you are... Seriously, have you any idea what you look like?"

"L-Like I've been caught in barb wire, then - thrown into a wood chipper?"

"I think that just about covers it... "

"Be still, John. I am certain that Ronon will be able to untangle you. It is ... unwise to move around so much."

"Move! No, not you, Sheppard. Keep your left arm still!"

"This galaxy... sure... has it in... for... my left arm... "

"Funny. Or - perhaps not. What is it with this galaxy and your left arm, anyway? Couldn't you consider getting injured in your right thigh every now and then? Not to mention that it's your turn for an arrow in your gluteus maximus."

"Yeah... No! Chewie, cut me loose, already! They could be right behind us!"

"It is true. Surely, they have discovered our absence by now."

"Was the siren your first clue? Hm?"

"John, please! I am certain it is uncomfortable, but please stop moving your legs!"

Yeah, buddy. Quit writhing. It can't hurt. Yet."

"Sharp. Stuff. Never. Does. At first. Unh... "

"You've got to be kidding! I remember riding my bike downhill. Brakes failed. Landed in some kind of evil, prickly bush. Might have been a rose bush. Or was it gorze? Never mind. It was evil. And prickly. And out to get me. And you think this galaxy is out to get you?"

"If you don't shut up, I'll be out to get you!"

"Ronon! John, if it truly does not hurt, then - be still! Ronon is almost done."

"Just... one... more... grrrr!"

"Aagh! Ghaah... "

"I have him! John, you are free... "

"Seriously, Sheppard. Did you have to use your own body for us to clamber over? We could all have just thrown our jackets over the fence, or cobbled together a ladder using our tac vests... "

"Hindsight... is always 20/20, McKay. Now, why... don't we... get... outta here... "

"Can you walk, John?"

"I. Can. Run."

"Yes, yes. I'm sure you can. You'll be up and running in no time. Just not today. Or anytime soon. Sheppard? Sheppard!"

"He merely passed out."

"I'm about to pass out myself. I don't do blood."

"McKay... !"

"Cease and desist with your neanderthal growling! I get it! Keep Sheppard awake. You should have seen my bike, Sheppard. It was a BMX. Metallic green. Brand new. The paintwork got scratched up and the front wheel got bent. The bell fell off. There, he's grinning. He's still with us. Happy?"

"Hurry! John is bleeding profusely."

"St-Stargate?"

"Dead ahead."

"Dead? N'n'n'n'no... Dialling... Yes! We live to be mutilated another day!"

"Sounds... like... a plan... "

"And Sheppard gets to sport yet another manly scar, or rather - lots more manly scars. Sheppard? John!"

"He is in shock, Rodney, but we are all safe. We - are home... "

"Uh? Y-Yeah... Home..."