Title: Oh, Mistletoes!
Summary: Sometimes someone is just too weird to comprehend the real matter.
Author's note: To avoid confusions/rash questions, this story is a bit AU. He's in his sixth-year while she's in her fifth-year. And it's certainly NOT romance-centered.
Oh, Mistletoes!
I might be ignorant, but nobody can get as ignorant as Luna "Loony" Lovegood. Or rather, as crazy as her.
I tell you, the girl is not right in the head. Aside from being a good observer, there is nothing else that you can call "normal" about her. She always has this dreamy look upon her face all the time, and nobody can really decipher everything that comes out from her mouth. She's really weird, if not insane.
Unless you're as weird as her, that is, and I have yet to find one.
Anyway, as I've said before, besides being plain weird, she is one ignorant girl. Really.
Why, you ask? Well, I'll tell you why.
It's Christmas season yet again, and you can guess what's going on around here. Presents, snowy grounds, Christmas trees, Christmas decorations, giggling girls, awkward-looking boys – are you following me here? When you add this certain Christmas decoration with giggling girls and awkward-looking boys, you should have gotten the picture already.
Mistletoes, that's right. See, you're not even that ignorant.
So you see, I was late for dinner once again (having forgotten the fastest route to get to the Great Hall) and reached there to find they were now having deserts.
Harry, Ron and Hermione were sitting together, as usual. None of them noticed I had arrived at the Great Hall, until I was a few feet closer.
"Neville!" Hermione called, beaming at me.
I took this beam as an invitation to sit with them.
"Mate, uuurmizdemancors," Ron strangled out. Hermione looked revolted while Harry smiled apologetically.
"What he meant to say is, 'you've missed the main course', right, Ron?" Harry deciphered as Ron nodded enthusiastically. Hermione's napkin came flying out of nowhere soon after this, and it hit him squarely on the face.
"Sorry," said Harry with an image Ron flinging Hermione's napkin back at her in the background, "anyway, where were you? I thought you were right behind us."
I shrugged, feeling a faint blush coming.
"I – uh – forgot something so I went back to the common room to get it," I told him, hoping the blush from telling a downright lie wouldn't deepen. I mean – I've been studying here for six years now, I should have known my way around now. But no, apparently my forgetfulness will continue to haunt and cause me miseries until the end of my days.
"Cheers, mate," Ron replied instead, this time he said it after he had swallowed his food, "you better grab those éclairs before they're gone."
I smiled awkwardly at this, and grabbed a few éclairs for myself.
About half an hour later, the trio, who had settled on taking a short walk on the Hogwarts snowy grounds earlier on, asked me to join them.
"No, thanks," I told them with a forced smile. After downing six éclairs, two Christmas puddings and a bottle of Butterbeer, I didn't fancy much of a walk just then.
"Right," said Harry. "See you."
"Yeah, see you," said Hermione as Ron merely patted me on the shoulder. Too bloated, I tell you.
After a few minutes, I thought I better get my bum of the bench and start heading back to the Gryffindor tower then.
The Entrance Hall was not as crowded as I had initially thought. In fact, most of the students were out there on the snowy grounds, perhaps having a game of throwing snowballs at one another. I was thinking about changing my mind then, but soon I realised that Malfoy could be out there with his gang – or worse, Professor Snape.
I seriously didn't want to risk bumping into them. Call me coward or anything, but I don't want to get into trouble or cause Gryffindor to lose some points for some unreasonable reasons.
So anyway, I found myself ascending up the main steps next, looking warily at elsewhere but my feet. I hate being stuck at any one of the Vanishing Steps at Hogwarts, you see, they have already caused me enough humiliation and trouble throughout my days in Hogwarts.
In fact, I kept on looking at my feet until I bumped into someone.
"Orff – sorry!" I gasped, massaging my forehead. Apparently, I had bumped into something really hard.
"It's all right," came a familiar dreamy voice.
I stopped massaging my forehead.
"Hullo, Neville," said Luna dreamily, "fancy meeting you here."
"Er – hi," I said in return, smiling awkwardly. My gaze then fell on the small wooden crate she was heaving.
"It's a Bowtruckle," said Luna knowingly next, "I'm just doing a favour for Professor Grubbly-Plank."
This time I found myself smiling forcefully at her. "Erm – right."
"Just had your dinner, I suppose?" she asked, smiling pleasantly. I nodded.
"Why don't you come up here?" Luna asked next, causing me to feel bewildered.
"Wh – what?"
"I feel awkward, having to stare down at you when it is supposed to be the other way around," she told me. It was then I realised that I, indeed, was looking up at her. Sensing myself going red, I ascended the last step and now found myself looking down at her.
She smiled.
"Now that's better," she said with the air of a mother fussing over her children.
I seriously didn't know what to make of that, so I cast my gaze over her head instead. What I saw next was quite surprising. A couple of Ravenclaw girls had just walked past us by, eyeing us suspiciously before putting their heads together and lapsing into a fit of giggle.
Well, I wasn't supposed to feel that surprised anyway. There I was, the well-known forgetful, clumsy Longbottom with "Loony" Lovegood, things shouldn't get any more interesting than that.
"Er – Loon, I mean – Luna, I need to get back to the Gryffindor tower to finish my – er – Potions essay," I said lamely.
Luna looked purely sympathetic.
"Professor Snape can be just as unkind as Ginny's older brother," she commented, out of the blue. And I seriously didn't know what to make of that except to smile sheepishly at her.
So there I was, standing there, not knowing what to reply to that when I saw another group of girls walking past us again, eyeing us with great interest before I realised that they, just a few seconds ago, were looking at something above our heads.
Slowly, I looked upwards.
And that was when I saw it.
Mistletoes.
I instinctively turned my gaze on Luna again, wondering what her reactions would be. She, too, was staring at the mistletoes. But instead of blushing or anything, she looked really shrewd. And I was dumbfounded by this.
"Mistletoes," she said, barely in a whisper. And my conscience automatically lapsed into this chanting, "Please, please don't kiss me – or ask me to kiss you – or whatever!"
I took one step backward, very slowly, hoping she would never catch me at it.
But too late, she caught me at it. I tried to feign nonchalance instead of guilt.
"Good thinking," she said instead.
Whew. So she didn't want to kiss me either. Thank Merlin.
"Told Harry the same thing too last year," she added with a faint dreamy smile.
Told Harry – what? Did she just say that? That Harry and her – Harry wanted ... like really?
"It's often infested with Nargles."
Narg - WHAT?
"What?" I blurted out before I could stop myself.
"Nargles," she repeated, looking slightly offended, "don't you know what Nargles are? They are these—"
And she droned on about these Nargles. I barely listened to a word she was saying, because I still hadn't quite recovered from the shock yet.
Luna … of all people, doesn't know what mistletoes are for, and me, of all people, does know what they are for.
"Listen, Luna," I interrupted all of the sudden (don't ask me why I did that, I just felt like I have to), "don't you know what mistletoes are really for?"
She stared at me with those owlish eyes of hers.
"Besides being homes to Nargles and Christmas decoration?" Luna asked naively, "besides those?"
I nodded. And she looked slightly disappointed.
"And I thought that was all," she said in a disappointed moan.
For the first time of the day, I smiled my first amused smile.
"Well, there's more," I told her. The next thing I knew, I could sense myself going red again. "Erm – do you want to know – I mean, really?"
Her eyes went really owlishly round; she seemed to be genuinely interested.
"Yes," she exclaimed happily, "maybe I can tell Daddy about it and have it on The Quibbler!"
Honestly, The Quibbler might be filled with rubbish, just as Hermione had once claimed, but even The Quibbler knew that this fact is so old news. And I don't think Luna's dad is even as ignorant as her.
"Well – er," I hesitated.
"Go on," she prompted happily. With the air of getting the worse over, I told her, "Well – er, when people meet under the mistletoe, they usually kiss."
There, I had told her.
She looked slightly … bewildered? No, was that … disappointment?
"That's … nice," Luna managed at last, "but it is not really that enlightening."
I tell you, when I heard this, I started to snigger. Not enlightening?
"Not enlightening? Luna, I'm not sure if everyone will agree with you," I told her.
She looked mortally offended. "It is, alas, a matter of view then. If you don't agree—"
Seeing the hurt in her eyes, I quickly recovered from the mirth and said hastily, "Of course I agree with you. I mean – it's just nonsense."
She beamed. "Exactly. Now, Nargles are far more interesting than that."
Hmm – I dunno about that one though.
"Oof – I have forgotten about the Bowtruckle!"
Yeah, I was too.
"I better get this one back to Professor Grubbly-Plank," said Luna as she started to rush down the stairs before she looked over her shoulder and yelled, "nice talking to you, Neville!"
I waved at her, feeling slightly uplifted in joining the true Christmas spirit all of the sudden.
And as I sit here by the fireplace, recalling back our conversation, I can't help but noticing that Luna maybe ignorant and weird, but she is a very … what's the word? Oh yeah, special. Special in her own way. There is no one quite like her around here. And somehow, I am glad that she is one of the few true friends I truly have. Weird she may be, but oh well.
That's Luna for you.